IMAGE  EVALUATION 
TEST  TARGET  (MT-3) 


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Photographic 

Sciences 
Corporation 


23  WEST  MAIN  STREET 

WEBSTER,  NY.  14580 

(716)  872-4503 


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CIHM/ICMH 
Microfiche 


CIHM/ICIVIH 
Collection  de 
microfiches. 


Canadian  Institute  for  Historical  Microreproductions  /  Institut  Canadian  de  microreproductions  historiques 


Technical  and  Bibliographic  Notes/Notes  techniques  et  bibliographiques 


T 
ti 


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D 


D 


D 


Coloured  covers/ 
Couverture  de  couleur 


I      I    Covers  damaged/ 


Couverture  endommagde 

Covers  restored  and/or  laminated/ 
Couverture  restaurde  et/ou  pelliculde 

Cover  title  missing/ 

Le  titre  de  couverture  manque 

Coloured  maps/ 

Cartes  gdographiques  en  couleur 

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Encre  de  couleur  (i.e.  aufe  que  bleue  ou  noire) 

Coloured  plates  and/or  illustrations/ 
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Bound  with  other  material/ 
Relid  avec  d'autres  documents 


D 


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La  re  liure  serr^e  peut  causer  de  I'ombre  ou  da  la 
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modification  dans  la  mdthode  normale  de  filmage 
sont  indiqu6s  ci-dessous. 


I      I    Coloured  pages/ 


D 


Pages  de  couleur 

Pages  damaged/ 
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Pages  discoloured,  stained  or  foxei 
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Qualitd  in^gale  de  i'impression 

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Only  edition  available/ 
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I      I  Pages  damaged/ 

I      I  Pages  restored  and/or  laminated/ 

r~7i  Pages  discoloured,  stained  or  foxed/ 

I      I  Pages  detached/ 

r~^  Showthrough/ 

I      I  Quality  of  print  varies/ 

I      I  Includes  supplementary  material/ 

I      I  Only  edition  available/ 


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C 

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Pages  wholly  or  partially  obscured  by  errata 
slips,  tissues,  etc.,  have  been  refilmed  to 
ensure  the  best  possible  image/ 
Les  pages  totalement  ou  partiellement 
obscurcies  par  un  feuillet  d'errata,  une  pelure, 
etc.,  ont  6:6  film^es  d  nouveau  de  fa9on  d 
obtenir  la  meilleure  image  possible. 


This  item  is  filmed  at  the  reduction  ratio  checked  below/ 

Ce  document  est  filmd  au  taux  de  reduction  indiqui  ci-dessous. 

10X  14X  18X  22X 


26X 


30X 


_7 

.^-li. 

12X 


16X 


20X 


24X 


28X 


32X 


9 

itails 
s  du 
lodifier 
r  une 
Image 


The  copy  filmed  here  has  been  reproduced  thanks 
to  the  generosity  of: 

Harold  Campbell  Vaughan  Memorial  Library 
Acadia  University 

The  images  appearing  here  are  the  best  quality 
possible  considering  the  condition  and  legibility 
of  the  original  copy  and  in  keeping  with  the 
filming  contract  specifications. 


L'exemplaire  filmi  fut  reproduit  grflce  A  la 
g6n6rosit6  de: 

Harold  Campbell  Vaughan  Memorial  Library 
Acadia  University 

Les  images  suivantes  ont  6t6  reproduites  avec  le 
plus  grand  soin,  compta  tenu  de  la  condition  et 
de  la  nettetd  de  l'exemplaire  filmd,  et  en 
conformity  avec  les  conditions  du  contrat  de 
filmage. 


Original  cupies  :n  printed  paper  covers  are  filmed 
beginning  with  the  front  cover  and  ending  on 
the  last  page  with  a  printed  or  illustrated  impres- 
sion, or  the  back  cover  when  appropriate.  All 
other  original  copies  are  filmed  beginning  on  the 
first  page  with  a  printed  or  illustrated  impres- 
sion, and  ending  on  the  last  page  with  a  printed 
or  illustrated  impression. 


Les  exemplaires  originaux  dont  la  couverture  en 
papier  est  imprimde  sont  film6s  en  commenpant 
par  le  premier  plat  et  en  terminant  soit  par  la 
dernidre  page  qui  comporte  une  empreinte 
d'impression  ou  d'illustration,  soit  par  le  second 
plat,  selon  le  cas.  Tous  les  autres  exemplaires 
originaux  sont  filmds  en  commenpant  par  la 
premidre  page  qui  comporte  une  empreinte 
d'impression  ou  d'illustration  et  en  terminant  par 
la  dernidre  page  qui  comporte  une  telle 
empreinte. 


The  last  recorded  frame  on  each  microfiche 
shall  contain  the  symbol  — ^  (meaning  "CON- 
TINUED "),  or  the  symbol  V  (meaning  "END"), 
whichever  applies. 


Un  des  symboles  suivants  apparaTtra  sur  la 
dernidre  image  de  cheque  microfiche,  selon  le 
cas-  le  symbole  — ^-signifie  "A  SUIVRE",  le 
symbole  V  signifie  "FIN". 


Maps,  plates,  charts,  etc.,  may  be  filmed  at 
different  reduction  ratios.  Those  too  large  to  be 
entirely  incl'jded  in  one  exposure  are  filmed 
beginning  in  the  upper  left  hand  corner,  left  to 
right  and  top  to  bottom,  as  many  frames  as 
required.  The  following  diagrams  illustrate  the 
met.iod: 


Les  cartes,  planches,  tableaux,  etc.,  peuvent  dtre 
filmds  d  des  taux  de  reduction  diffdrents. 
Lorsque  le  document  est  trop  grand  pour  dtre 
reproduit  en  un  seul  clichd,  il  est  filmd  A  partir 
de  Tangle  supdrieur  gauche,  de  gauche  d  droite, 
et  de  haut  en  bas,  en  prenant  le  nombre 
d'images  ndcessaire.  Les  diagrammes  suivants 
illustrent  la  mdthode. 


trrata 
to 


pelure, 
nd 


n 


32X 


1 

2 

3 

12  3 

4  5  6 


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—  .  I  wi-  iriT«iiM» 


The 


/ 


LIFE 


•''n 


AND 


J     O     U     R     N 


A 


j&^ 


OF  THE 


Rev.  Mr.  HENRY  ALLINE 


J  ^«'^TED  Bv  GILBERT l:f  BEAN, 


,„,  „  **"*'»  Prist  IKO  AND 

I-oxTE^v  0„.cE,  No.  ^8.  Sta„.St»„t. 


I806> 


ACADIA  COLLEGE  LIBRARY,' 
WOLFVILLE.  N.3. 


District  of  Massachusetts,  to  wit : 

BE  it  Remembered,  that  on  the  eighteenth  rl^y  of  December, 
in  the  thirtieth  year  of  the  Independence  of  the  United  States 
of  America,  Hayden  &  Shead,  of  the  said  District,  have  de- 
posited in  this  Office  the  Title  of  a  Book,  the  Right  whereof  they 
claim  as  Proprietors,  in  the  following  words,  to  loit  : 
'^The  Life  and  Journal  of  the  Rev.  Mr,  HEJ^RY  ALLIKE^ 
In  conformity  to  the  Act  of  Congress  of  the  Unied  States,  en- 
titled «•  An  Act  for  the  encouragement  of  Learning,  by  securing 
the  Copies  of  Maps,  Charts  and  Books,  to  the  Authors  and  Pro- 
prietors  of  such  Copies  during  the  time  therein  mentioned  :  and 
extending  the  Benefits  thereof  to  the  arts  of  Designing,  Engrav- 
ing, and  Etching  Historical  and  other  Prints." 

N.  GOODALE, 
Clerk  of  the  District  of  Massachusetts* 
A  true  copy  <f  Record. 
Jtt€st»ii,  GOODALE,  Clerk. 


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4..^^.^^.i»>.  i)).  i))i.>>t«..(<ii»»  i)i'  'Hi  !>)■  »>)■  ^[ 


THE 


Rlv.  Mb.  henry  ALLINE'S 


LIFE,  &c. 


■ 


c 


HRIST  is  tlie  fountain  of  life,  the  source 
of  happiness,  the  ^lory  of  anjijelic  reahiis,  and  the  triumph 
of  Saints,  and  1  trust  is  the  life  of  my  soul,  the  joy  of  my 
life,  my  present  and  everlasting  portion.  I  therefore  desire^ 
and  intend  by  his  grace  that  his  name  should  be  my  theme, 
until  the  last  peinod  of  my  days.  And  O  may  his  blessed 
Spirit  be  breathed  into  all  my  endeavours,  may  his  love 
sweeten  all  my  trials,  invigorate  all  my  labours  ;  may  his 
name  fill  up  every  period  of  my  life,  when  in  private,  and 
every  sentence,  when  in  public  :  and  hoping  that  he  will 
cause  me  to  write  and  leave  amongst  the  rest  of  my  writ- 
ings this  short  account  of  my  life.  And  as  that  is  my  de- 
sign, I  shall  not  overburden  the  reader  with  a  relation  of 
many  passages  that  would  be  of  no  benefit,  but  shall  only 
relate  that,  which  may  be  worth  the  readers  perusal. 

i  WAS  born  in  Newport,  in  the  government  of  Rhode- 
Island,  in  North  America,  on  the  14th  day  of  June,  1748, 
of  William  and  Rebecca  Alline,  who  were  born  and  brought 
up  in  Boston,  who  gave  me  an  early  instruction  in  the  prin- 
ciples of  the  christian  religion.  I  was  early  sent  to  school, 
and  was  something  forward  in  leaniing ;  was  very  early 
moved  upon  by  the  spirit  of  God,  though  I  knew  not  then 
what  ailed  me. 

The  first  moving  I  remember  was,  when  about  eigh^t 
^£axs_o£ag;e,  by  some  discourse  between  my  father  and  mt 
eldest  sister,  in  a  thunder-storm,  when  I  heard   her  say. 
that  she  had  reason  to  be  so  distressed,  thiU  if  she  :should 


\V-f^HqSfe^-§-^ 


4  RKV.  HENRY  AM.INF^S 

be  killed  with  the  iightninj^,  as  many  had  been,  she  sliould 
^-•o  right  to  hell.  I  heard  the  words,  and  they  struck  mc 
to  the  heart,  thinkin,!;  within  myself,  what  that  could  mean, 
and  sayinj^  to  myselt,  what  is  that  hell,  1  hep^an  to  recollect 
v/hat  I  had  been  tau^ijht  al)out  hell  ;  wiiich  before  I  had 
thought  no  more  of,  than  to  repeat  the  words,  as  they  were 
taiijjht  me  :  and  as  1  thus  pondered  (thouj^h  so  youn^)  1 
beg:an  to  ha\  j  horrible  conceptions  of  that  place,  and  often 
said  to  myself, what,  is  my  sisterRebeixa  p;oing  the-e  :  what, 
is  she  r^oing  to  hell  ?  This  distressed  my  soul  to  tliat  de- 
gree, that  I  went  to  bed,  and  began  to  cry,  and  to  pray  to 
some  great  God,  which  I  began  to  conceive  of  ;  for  1  had 
before  thought  no  more  of  prayer,  though  I  was  taught 
(and  my  father  prayed  in  his  family  every  night  and  morn- 
ing) to  repeat  a  number  of  words,  as  I  did  my  lesson  at 
school  ;  but  I  now  began  to  think  there  was  a  heaven  and 
hell ;  that  there  was  a  God,  who  was  such  a  hard  htartcd 
and  cruel  beiag,  that  there  was  need  of  praying  a  grent 
deal,  to  get  h.m  pleased,  and  get  his  favour,  and  did  not 
wonder,  that  my  fatiier  prayed  so  much  ;  I  thought  if  he 
had  not  prayed  so  much,  we  should  all  be  sent  to  hell. 

I  NOW  used  to  pray  at  every  opportunity,  even  while  I 
was  walking  along,  when  going  to  school,  or  elsewhere, 
that  this  angry  God  would  not  send  me  to  hell.  1  used 
likewise  to  pray  for  my  relations,  that  they  might  be  all 
fived.  I  would  sometimes  give  way  to  play  and  vanity 
with  my  play-mates,  and  then  I  would  think  that  God  was 
more  angry  than  ever,  and  so  I  would  pray  and  confess, 
and  promise  to  make  it  up. 

1  NOW  began  to  examine  and  study  what  I  read,  J^nd 
what  I  was  taught  in  my  catechism,  that  Ada.n  had  rebel- 
It  d,  and  that  all  the  world  must  be  sent  to  hell  and  be  pun- 
ished with  all  that  could  b  j  inflicted  on  them  for  that  sin, 
excepting  here  and  there  one,  that  Go<l  had  picked  out,  and 
the  rest,  though  they  were  invited  to  come-^o  Christ,  and  a 
sort  of  sham-offer  of  salvation  made  them,  yet  there  was 
none  for  them, neither  did  God  intend  to  save  them,  when  he 
made  them  the  offer,  and  yet  would  puuish  them  to  all  eter- 
;iity  for  rejecting  Christ,  when  there  was  no  Christ  for  them. 

Such  blasphemous,  but  natural  consequences  arose 
from  what  I  had  been  taught ;  which  caused  me  to  conceive 
God  to  be  an  ill-natured,  cruel  being,  pleasir;^  himself  with 
seeing  and  keeping  pooi*  creatures  \fi  everlasting  torments* 


>t  4 


X. 


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I' 


LIFE  ANB  JOURNAL.  5 

and  then  1  would  tremble,  sometimes  expecting  he  would 
send  me  '  ^imediately  to  hell,  for  charging  him  with  it  in 
my  mind,  tmd  yet  1  could  not  liclp  it,  for  1  was  still  obliged 
to  think  so.  Thus  I  was  led  to  think  of  God  as  bad  as  of 
the  devil  by  that  blasphemous  doctrine,  that  God  decreed 
or  forc-ordained  whatsoever  comes  to  pass,  and  consequent- 
ly the  death  and  damnation  of  the  greatest  part  of  the 
world,  and  yet  made  them  an  offer  of  salvation,  when  there 
is  none  for  them  ;  and  thus  they  make  him  a  dissembler, 
and  charge  him  with  hype  jrisy  ;  offering  to  a  poor  soul,  that 
which  he  doth  not  design  he  should  have. 

Why  will  they  dress  up  a  loving,  good  (yea  all  good) 
and  glorious  Being,  in  such  a  black  and  ridiculous  habit  ? 
Why  will  they  drive  poor  bewildered  souls  to  hell  with  not 
only  such  shocking  blas'^nemous  thoughts  of  God,  but  like- 
wise despairing  of  any  mercy  from  him  ?  Why  do  they 
not"  let  God  speak  for  himself,  when  he  swears  by  himself, 
that  he  has  no  pleasure  in  the  deatii  of  the  wicked?  Why 
do  they  not  let  sinners  know,  that  he  has  said,  that  it  is  not 
his  will  that  any  should  perish,  but  all  should  come  to  the 
knowledge  of  the  truth,  and  trust  that  whosoever  will,  may 
come  ?  And  instead  of  telling  sinners  that  God  will  damn 
them  and  send  them  to  hell,  if  they  live  in  their  sins,  why 
do  they  not  tell  them  that  they  are  already  under  the  curse 
of  a  hellish  nature  by  their  own  sin,  which  they  acted  in 
Adam,  and  those  that  reject  salvation  and  love  darkness 
rather  than  light,  they  make  their  own  hell,  and  go  to  their 
own  place,  and  that  thttir  own  nature  wHl  torment  them 
and  be  at  such  an  enmity  and  rage  against  God,  as  will  ex- 
clude them  from  all  possibility  of  ever  receiving  help  by  the 
love  and  mercy  of  God,  for  there  is  nothing  they  so  much, 
hate  and  will  so  much  rage  against,  as  the  love,  goodness 
and  purity  of  God. 

I  STILL  remained  distressed  in  mind  a  great  part  of 
my  time,  and  though  my  plays  often  led  me  away  for 
hours,  yet  I  was  not  happy  in  them  ;  for  I  thought  myself 
in  great  danger,  and  often,  whe  nwriting  at  school,  would  so 
ponder  on  my  miserable  condition,  that  I  could  scarcely 
keep  my  distress  concealed.  O  the  unhappy  hours  I  wad- 
ed through,  and  knew  not  what  to  do,  neither  did  I  reveal 
my  mind  to  any  one.  I  would  often  go  up  in  the  garreti 
where  I  could  see  the  burying  place;  and  many  younger 
^:l^:   i>  a  A  2 


REV.  HENRY  ALl.INE  b 


(    > 


c}»ildren,  tlian  I  \vas,  carried  there,  and  thought  1  >voiiiiI 
give  all  the  world,  if  I  knew  where  they  were  fjone  ;  and 
would  cry  as  it  my  heart  would  break,  and  pray  to  this  un- 
known Being,  that  he  would  not  send  nie  to  hell,  and  tliiit 
1  might  not  die,  until  I  knew  how  to  prepare  for  death  ;  for 
I  thought  there  was  something  to  be  done,  which  I  could 
do,  when  I  was  grown  up.  I  still  felt  a  continual  fear,  that 
I  might  die  ;  and  if  1  should,  O  the  thoughts  where  I 
should  awake.  1  offen  in  my  heart  felt  angry  with  old  A 
dam,  and  thought  he  was  very  faolish,  and  ought  to  have 
punishment  for  ruining  himself  and  all  his  posterity  only 
for  tiie  sake  of  a  few  apples,  or  some  other  sort  of  fruit,  as 
I  thought,  yea  and  many,  many  professed  christians  do 
think  still,  that  the  trees  of  that  paradise  were  corporeal. 

When  I  was  about  nine  years  of  age,  I  be|}^an  to  read 
much  in  the  books  that  I  could  understand,  and  studied 
much  to  find  out  how  to  get  in  favour  with  the  great  invisi- 
ble God.  1  went  to  meeting  almost  every  Sabbath  and  some 
would  tell  me  about  the  stars,  and  great  things  that  God 
had  made,  and  others  the  necessity  of  externals,  and  being 
moral,  &:c.  but  I  do  not  remember  that  ever  1  heard  anv 
one  of  them  adapt  their  discourse  to  the  capacity  of  chil- 
dren, and  tell  them  in  plain  words,  that  they  must  be  born 
again  by  the  spirit  of  God,  and  that  tlicy  must  feel  and 
know  this  new  birth  each  one  for  himselfi  Indeed,  I 
suppose,  that  if  the  minister  in  many  churches  and  socie- 
ties was  to  leave  his  old  town,  or  old  paper  that  he  is  read- 
ing, and  begin  with  the  young  people  and  children,  asking 
them  what  they  knew  of  conversion  and  impress  the  im- 
mediate necessity  of  the  knowledge  of  the  spirit  of  God  in 
their  souls,  it  would  be  so  new,  that  the  people  would  start 
and  stare,  as  if  the  man  v^as  nmning  wild.  O  what  a  curse 
are  such  poor  formal  blind  leaders  I  Lord  have  mercy  on 
them,  and  open  their  eyes,  and  save  the  poor  souls,  that 
they  are  leading  to  perdition,  before  they  are  gone  beyond 
recovery. 

When  I  was  about  jen^-t  had  got  something  of  a  theo- 
ry of  religion,  but  it  di^rnot  satisfy  me  ;  I  was  much  afraid 
of  being  called  away  hy  death,  and  O  the  distressing 
thoughts  I  had  of  dying  and  going  I  knew  not  where  ;  yea 
I  was  so  afraid  of  death,  that  whenever  I  felt  any  pains  in 
my  body,  I  would  tremble,  thinking  it  was  some  disorder, 
that  would  carry  nxe  off  j  and  whenever  1  went  a  swim- 


-•'K 


# 


i7'\ 


(  > 


tlir.   ANT)  JoLRVAL. 


:^ 


:/ 


^\\ 


iniiif^  wit!\  my  niLvtcs,  1  wovM  pray,  tl.ut  I  inij^^ht  not  Ix- 
drowned  ;  and  almost  every  nii-Ut  I  went  to  my  bed,  I 
vafi  afraid  I  should  die,  because  1  could  not  die  praying. 

In  the  year   1760,  my  parents  (after  a  lonj»;  consulta- 
tion) concluded  to  move  to  Nova-Scotia  ;  this  filled  me 
>vith  hope  and  fear  :  1  had  great  desires  to  live  in  tlie  coun- 
try ;   1  thought  there  were  many  things  in  the  country  to 
amuse  me,  and  make  me  happy,  tliat  there  were  not  in  a 
town  ;  and  1  thought  myself  \veari<:d  with  every  thin^  that 
the  town  afforded  me  ;  but  still  1   hud   t»v.>  tilings  that  i 
greatly  feared  in  going  ;  the  one  was  the  danj^erof  the  sea, 
the  other  was  the  fear  of  the  Indians  in  that  country.  How- 
ever upon  the  whole  I  rather  chose  to   go   thaii  stay,  and 
though  wu  had  a  long  passage,  wc  were  carried  safe    into 
Nova-Scotia,  my  parents  with  seven  children .^  I  was  novr 
for  a  short  time  pleased  with  the   country  ;  1  thought  I 
should  enjoy  happy  days,  Init  alas  my  joys  luid  hopes  were 
soon  eclipsed,  when  it  was  frequently  reported,  that  the  In- 
dians were  about  rising  to  destroy  us  j  and  many  came  out 
among  us  with  their  laces   painted,  aiul   declared  that  the 
English  should  not   settle  this   country.     Anel  now  I  was 
more  uneasy  then  ever.     I  did  not  think  n\yself  fit  to  die, 
and  expected  to  be  killed.    1  was  so  distressed,  that  I   have 
laid  awake  manv  and  mativ  an  hour,  sometimes  almost   all 
night  listening,  and  oiten  thought,  when   1   heard  the  dog 
bark,  or  the  cattle  walking  round  the  house,  that  they  v/ere 
really  coming  or  come  ;  and   what   would  be  the  conse- 
quence ?  why  thev  would  kdl  us   all,  and  I  was  not  fit  to 
die  :  and  O  then  the  racking  thoughts,  perhaps  in  a  few 
hours  or  minutes  1  should  be  in  hell.     O  no  tongue  can  tell' 
what  I  endured*     I  still  continued  praying  and  vratching 
over  all  my  outward  conduct,  and  guarding  against  every 
public  vice,  still  hoping  that  I  might  yet  obtain  the  favour 
of  God,  and  be  saved  from  everlasting  misery.     The  dayS' 
I  spent  (when  I  was  not  about  some  worldly  employ)  much' 
in  walking  in  the  fields  and  in  meditation,  and  tjie  more  I 
contemplated  my  own  state  and  the  certainty  of  death  at* 
some  uncertain  moment,   the  more  distressed  I  was,  and 
found  that  the  scenes  and  pleasures  of  a  country  life  would 
not  satisfy  me,  and  I  began  ^o  wish  myself  back  again  with 
my  mates  and  the  amusements  of  the  town. 

Thus  the  poor  awakened  soul  in  his  distress  is  seek- 
ing and  roving  here  and  thcrcj  and  every  scheme  he  ciin 


REV.   IIENRT  Ar.LlNF.*S 


loiitrivc  to  find  pence,  rest  and  happiness  fails  him,  andean 
find  nothing  bcnficiul  to  his  poor,  sturvini^,  wandering  soul, 
until  he  finds  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ.  And  as  for  him,  they 
have  no  knowledge  of  him  any  further  than  a  historical  ac- 
count, whicii  will  not  satisfy  a  soul  under  deep  conviction. 
Thus  I  was  vvandciing  ni;^ht  and  day  in  this  distressed 
stale,  loaded  witli  guilt  and  darkness,  and  a  stranger  to  one 
moment's  solid  rest  or  true  lra|)[)incss.  All  iIk*  glories  and 
joys  of  creation  appeared  empty,  and  yet  my  mina  like  a 
drowning  man,  \vi\o  will  catch  at  a  straw,  would  catch  at 
this  and  that  prospect  of  some  enjoyments  here  on  earth, 
or  l)etler  days  by  and  by  :  but  oh  they  all  failed  me.  Ma- 
r.y  were  the  tenn)lations  I  was  led  into  by  my  dark  mind  ; 
once  for  a  considerable  time  1  was  led  to  believe  that  God 
had  neither  love  nor  regard  for  any  of  his  creatures,  but 
would  leave  them  all  in  misery,  and  only  give  them  all  ex- 
istence \N  ilhout  taking  any  care  of  them  :  I  would  say  with- 
in niyself,  I  know  not  who  or  where  he  is,  and  I  see  all  man- 
kind in  some  degree  of  misery,  want  and  disajipoinlment, 
and  I  see  idmost  al'  that  I  see,  with  their  knowk  -Ige  and  at- 
tention in  this  world,without  discovering  any  knowledge  of  or 
relation  with  tliat  (iod  they  pretended  to  know.  And  when 
I  saw  the  darkness,  ignorance,  stupidity  and  misery  of  this 
miserable  race  rushing  to  the  eternal  world  without  any 
visible  manifestations  of  God*s  care  over  them,  or  concern 
for  them,  I  could  but  conclude,  that  the  full  of  man  was  true 
enough  ;  for  I  felt  and  saw  the  misery, but  that  their  recove- 
ry or  mercy  from  God  through  Christ  towards  them,  was 
all  uncertain:  for  how  could  we  know  there  was  any  ntore 
truth  in  that  history,  than  in  the  alcoran  of  Mahomet  ? 

Oh  the  distressing  days  and  unhappy  nights,  that  I 
have  waded  through  !  nothing  but  darkness,  nothing  but 
distress  and  slavish  fear.  Sometimes  when  I  was  %/ander- 
ing  in  the  fields,  I  would  throw  myself  down  on  the  grass, 
and  lament  as  if  I  should  go  into  despair  :  and  it  is  a  won- 
der of  wonders,  that  I  did  not  embrue  my  hands  in  my  own 
blood.  I  still  continued  praying  to  this  unknown  God,  for 
although  I  had  not  much  .hope  there,  yet  it  was  my  last 
resource.  I  thought  if  sickness  was  to  come  upon  me,  I 
should  go  into  despair  ;  but  it  was  not  so  :  for  when  I  was 
about  jourteen  years  of  age,  I  was  taken  down,  and  mj 
bodily  disorder  so  st'ipified  my  mind,  that  1  had  no  more 
sense  or  coucerii  for  my  soul,  than  a  beast,  or  tiian  if  I  had 


»': 


i 


M 


LIFE  AND  JOUUNAI.. 


no  soul ;  aiul  ulthou-,!;h  I  licard  the  doctor  tell  my  mother, 
when  ?ske(l  whiit  he  ihouj^ht  of  me,  suy,  thut  he  believed  I 
never  should  recover,  yet  it  did  not  even  cause  one  thouj^lit, 
us  I  remeuxber,  what  would  become  of  my  soul,  or  when  I 
should  awake:  Ifelt  a  desire  for  ease  from  my  pains,  but  was 
so  stupid,  as  to. have  no  concern  at  all  alxjut  those  eternal 
tlunps,whi(hbcfore  had  so  employed  and  racked  my  attention. 
I  NOW  be^an  more  earnestly  than  ever  to  seek  this 
)inknown  (lod,  pruyinj]^  every  opportunity  ;  did  read  and 
study  much,  by  wl\irh  I  soon  atlaineil  to  a  j^reat  theory  of 
rclii^ion  for  one  of  my  a^e,  and  ^ot  a  considerable  Babul 
built  up  ;  but  oh  the  temptations  and  trials  tliat  1  now  be- 
};an  to  full  in,  which  almost  drove  me  to  despair.  I  first 
l)eiijan  to  be  puiVed  up  with  a  conceit  that  I  was  endowed 
with  uncommon  gifts  and  powers  of  mind,  which  if  im» 
proved,  I  should  be  able  to  find  out  and  fathom  that  lonj^ 
{bidden  mystery.  Eternity.  I  began  to  embrace  the  tempt- 
ation, and  to  pursue  the  hidden  mystery  and  dive  for  the 
bottomless  ocean. 

Soon  did  the  devil  witii  all  his  whiles  control  ' 

The  active  pow'rs  of  my  deluded  soul ; 
Presumed  to  unlaid  the  depth  unknown 
To  all,  but  the  eternal  God  alone. 

O  ETERNITY,  fctemity,  unfathomable  eternity  !  The 
joy  of  the  righteous,  but  the  dread  of  the  wicked.  1  now 
spent  hours  and  hours  poring  on  this  unknown  mystery  ; 
not  expecting  to  find  any  period  to  this  never  ending  dur- 
ation; but  that  I  might  find  the  consistency  of  an  endless  dur- 
ation and  the  nature  of  it ;  for  I  did  not  believe  that  eterni- 
ty ever  had  any  beginning  or  should  ever  have  any  end, 
but  expected  to  get  so  far  into  the  mystery  as  to  see  clear- 
ly how  it  was  that  eternity  was  in  itself  a  duration  without 
beginning  or  end  :  yea  I  thought  I  never  could  be  happy, 
until  1  had  thus  far  comprehended  the  mystery  :  neither 
had  I  any  thought  all  this  time,  that  I  was  under  a  tempta- 
tion, or  guilty  of  any  sin  in  attempting  it,  but  rather  imag- 
ined that  it  was  my  duty  ;  that  I  might  likewise  be  able  to 
communicate  the  mystery  to  others,  although  I  had  alrea- 
dy found  by  woful  experience  the  unhappy  consequence  of 
my  folly :  for  I  had  been  so  intense  and  engaged  in  the 
pursuit  of  this  mystery,  that  sometimes  I  thought  my  soul 
and  body  would  have  parted  asunder,  and  my  mind  was  in 
auch  a  confusion  as  to  border  on  despair.      Often  times  t 


10 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE*S 


would  sit  down  in  my  private  hours,  or  at  my  work,  with  a 
tietermination  neither  to  leave  the  place  or  subject  until  I 
had  some  insight  in  this  infinite  mystery.  Then  I  would  be- 
gin to  extend  and  stretch  every  faculty  of  my  soul  through 
a  long  succession  of  future  ages, and  would  sometimes  imag- 
ine, that  I  had  almost  fathomed  the  mystery.  Thus  being  en- 
couraged and  hurried  on  by  the  grand  Adversary,  would 
still  stretch  my  conceptions,  grasp  a  repeated  multipli- 
city of  years,  and  million?  of  ages  in  futurity,  I  being  still 
60  impatient  to  conceive  of  duration,  soaring  into  the  infi- 
nite ocean,  until  I  was  almost  racked  to  despair  :  for  ail 
the  concei)tion  I  attained  to  at  last  was,  that  I  found  my- 
self a  mystery  of  unhappy  existence  between  two  incon- 
ceivable eternities,  or  as  an  unextinguishable  spark  of  life 
hanging  over  or  fluctuating  in  an  infinite,  unbounded  abyss 
or  bottomless  ocean.  When  I  was  in  this  almost  despair- 
ing moment  by  these  distressing  views,  the  devil  would  tell 
me,  that  in  a  contimr  d  duration  and  perpe  .i.al  round  of  ex- 
istence, it  was  not  in  the  power  of  God  himself  to  make  any 
of  his  creatures  happy  ;  for  the  greatest  pleasures  and 
happiness,  that  could  possibly  be  enjoyed  by  a  continual 
succession  or  repetition,  would  become  a  torment.  Oh 
what  racks  of  horror  and  despairing  views  1  would  then 
be  in,  beyond  what  tongue  can  tell.  Being  in  such  a  distress 
I  would  rise  up,  and  leap,  and  step?  and  then  stop  and  turn 
and  stalk  about  like  a  mad  man,  or  a  frighted  gliost,  when 
I  have  been  in  the  field,  or  my  private  walks ;  at  the  same 
time  being  filled  with  blasphemous  reflections  against  God, 
because  he  had  given  me  an  unhappy  existence,  that  coul^ 
never  be  extinguished,  and  yet  could  not  bear  the  Ihougnts 
of  annihilation.  And  thus  I  may  say  I  have  been  times 
without  number,  both  night  and  day,  on  my  bed  and  in 
my  solitary  walks,  by  this  temptation  plunged  into  inex- 
pressible horrors  and  racking  views  of  despair ;  yea  I 
thought  never  a  poor  soul  could  be  in  more  horror  on  this  < 
side  of  hell ;  so  that  I  was  many  times  constrained  to  cry 
out  with  an  audible  voice  and  horrid  groans.  And  although 
the  devil  had  almost  made  me  believe  that  it  was  not  in 
the  power  of  God  to  make  me  happy,  yet  I  remember,  that 
the  first  words  that  I  would  generally  express,  when  I  was 
in  such  scenes  of  horr«r  and  distress,  would  be,  O  Lord 
God,  O  Lord  God,  have  mercy  on  me,  have  mercy  on  me, 
have  mercy  on  me  I  O  Lord  God  have  mercy  on  me,  have 


■i 


1 
l! 


1^ 


'  .r 


ll 


I 


( 
I 


J: 


I 


* 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


11 


have  mercy  on  me,  have  mercy  on  me,  &c.  with  a  great 
many  more  such  like  repetitions,  until  that  God,  who  was 
more  merciful  to  nie  than  I  was  to  myself,  would  in  some 
measure  retrieve  me  from  the  verge  of  despair,  give  me  a 
gleam  of  hope,  that  there  was  a  who  can  tell,  but  that  God 
is  able  to  make  me  happy >  if  I  was  in  heaven  with  him. 
Thus  I  was  hm-ried  and  driven  by  the  devil  and  my  own 
heart  almost  to  despair,  and  nothing  but  the  mighty  power 
of  God  kept  me  from  Isying  violent  hands  on  myself  ;  and 
although  I  began  sometimes  to  be  convinced,  that  it  was  a 
mystery  that  never  was,  nor  never  could  be  known  or  un- 
folded by  men  or  angels,  yet  when  the  de\al  would  come 
again  with  his  infernal  snares,  and  teli  me  that  I  had  almost 
found  out  the  mystery,  and  that  if  I  would  try  once  more,  I 
might  unfold  the  whole,  I  would  a^ain  summon  up  every 
faculty  of  my  soul  to  follow  the  suggestion. 

So  like  a  foo!,  swift  for  destruction  bent, 
Then  re-inforc'd,  and  to  the  battle  went ; 
Nop  would  retreat,  until  a  venon\'d  dart 
Turning  with  fury  to  my  bleeding  heart ;  • 
Then  would  my  tortur'd  soul  despairing  cry 
Forgive  me  Lord,  and  save  me,  lest  I  die.  / 

O  M  Y  soul,  never  forget  the  hand,  the  blessed  and  invisi- 
ble hand  that  kept  me  from  embruing  my  hands  in  my  own 
blood.  Ten  thousand  praises  belong  to  the  Lamb,  that 
kept  me  from  the  jaws  of  the  roaring  lion,  and  inter- 
posed between  me  and  eternal  ruin. 

Thus  for  three  years  I  was  racked  in  diving  into  that 
infinite  unfathomaSle  mystery.  O  eternity  !  eternity  I  in- 
comprehensible eternity  I  known  by  none  but  God,  and  yet 
the  existence  of  every  soul,  both  of  the  wicked  and  of  the 
righteous  :  and  happy  only  are  they  who  are  prepared  for 
a  blessed  eternity.  And  O  will  the  wicked  endure  everlas- 
ting night  ?  and  O  blessed,  forever  blessed  be  the  Lamb  : 
he  not  only  warned  me  from  that  eternity  of  unspeakable 
misery,  but  likewise  convinced  me  of  the  danger  I  was  in, 
while  out  of  Christ  being  wholly  exposed  to  take  up  my 
miserable  abode  in  that  bottomless  gulf,  and  shewed  me 
that  unless  I  had  an  interest  in  his  love  I  must  certainly  ex- 
ist in  keen  despair,  in  that  endless  duration,  which  I  had 
seen  but  a  small  glimpse  of.  I  now  began  to  see  mere  of 
my  lost,  undone  condition,  than  ever  I  had  seen  before.  I 
saw  that  I  was  in  the  gall  of  bitterness  and  bonds  of  iniqiu- 


12 


RF.V.  HENRY  ALMNE*S 


'.J^ 


ty,  and  had  no  lot  nor  portion  among  the  righteous,  rnd 
therefore  was  exposed  every  breath  to  be  cut  off  and  drop 
into  that  bottomless  gulf  ;  and  was  now  so  sensible  of  my 
lost  undone  condition,  that  I  thought  I  should  never  rest 
any  more  till  I  fiad  found  rest  for  my  soul :  and  although  I 
was  again  often  taken  in  the  former  temptation,  yet  1  con- 
tinued seeking  and  begging  for  mercy  from  the  unknown 
God.  1  was  now  very  moral  in  my  life,  but  found  no  rest 
of  conscience.  I  now  began  to  be  esteemed  in  youi.^ 
company,  who  knew  nothing  of  my  mind  all  this  while, 
and  their  esteem  began  to  be  a  snare  to  my  soulj  for  I 
soon  began  to  be  fond  of  carnal  mirth,  though  I  still  fiat- 
tei  cd  myself  that  if  1  did  not  get  drunk,  nor  curse,  nor 
swear,  there  would  be  no  sin  in  frolicking  and  carnal  mirth, 
and  I  thought  God  would  indulge  young  people  with  some 
(what  I  called  simple  or  civil)  recreation.  I  still  kept  a 
round  of  duties,  and  would  not  suffer  myself  to  run  into 
any  open  vices  and  so  got  along  very  well  in  time  of  health 
and  prosperity,  but  when  I  was  distressed  or  threatened  by 
sickness,  death  or  heavy  stonms  of  thunder,  my  religion 
would  not  do,  and  I  found  there  was  something  wanting, 
and  would  begin  to  repent  my  going  so  much  to  frolicks, 
and  I  promised  to  break  off  from  bad  company  ;  but  when 
the  distress  was  over,  the  devil  and  my  own  wicked  heart, 
with  the  solicitations  of  my  associates,  and  my  fondness  for 
young  company,  were  such  strong  allurements,  I  would  a- 
gain  give  »ray,and  this  I  got  to  be  very  wild  and  rude,  at  the 
same  time  kept  up  my  rounds  of  secret  prayer  and  reading  ; 
but  Cod  not  willing  I  should  destroy  myself  still  followed  me 
with  his  calls,  and  moved  with  such  power  upon  my  con- 
science, that  I  could  not  satisfy  myself  with  my  diversions," 
nor  attend  them  without  some  reluctance,  and  in  the  midst 
of  my  mirth  sometimes  would  have  such  a  sense  of  my 
lost  and  undone  condition,  that  1  would  wish  myself  from 
the  company  ;  and  after  it  w  as  over,  when  I  went  home, 
would  make  many  promises  that  I  would  attend  no  more 
on  these  frolicks,  and  would  beg  for  forgiveness  for  hours 
and  hours  ;  but  when  I  came  to  have  the  temptation  again, 
I  would  give  way,  and  promise  that  I  would  keep  up  a  bet- 
ter watch,  and  not  give  way  to  be  so  rude  and  vain  as  I  was 
before  ;  and  then  thought,  when  I  came  away  I  should  not, 
be  distressed,  nor  find  any  guilt  on  my  mind  :  but  when  I 
went,  the  devil  and  my  own  heart,  and  the  amusements  of 


'ii 


I   ? 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAt.. 


i^ 


'•i; 


t  ■■■ 

'i.  i 


\^ 


the  time  would  soon  make  me  be  as  wild  as  before :  no 
sooner  would  I  hear  the  music  and  drink  a  glass  of  wine,  but 
I  would  find  my  mind  elevated  and  soon  proceed  to  any  sort 
of  merriment  or  diversicn,  that  I  thought  was  not  debauch- 
ed or  openly  vicious,  or  that  I  thought  would  be  a  blot  in  my 
character  ;  but  when  I  retun^d  from  my  carnal  mirth  I 
felt  as  gtiilty  as  ever,  and  could  sometimes  not  close  my 
eyes  for  some  hours  after  I  had  got  home  to  my  btjd,  on 
account  of  the  guilt  I  had  contracted   the  evening    before. 

0  what  snares  were  these  frolicks  and  young  company  to 
my  soul,  and  had  not  God  been  more  merciful  to  me  than 

1  was  to  myself,  they  would  have  proved  my  fatal  and   ir- 
revocable ruin.     O  let  all  those  that  love  their  own  souls 
flee,  flee  from  carnal  pleasures,  and  young  carnal  company, 
as  they  would  from  the  gates  of  eternal  misery  ;  for  it  is 
poison  to  the  soul,  as  ratsbane  is  to  the  body  :  such  ways 
are  the  ways  of  death,  and  such  steps  take  hold   of  hell ; 
which  sins  I  began  to  follow,  when  about  seventeen  years  of 7 
age,  and  continued  in  following  them  until  I  was  twenty  ' 
three,  and  part  of  my  twenty  fourth.     O  what  a  wonder 
that  ever  I  was  snatched  from  that  alluring  snare.  The  Lord 
still  followed  me,  and  would  not  give  me  up  ;  I  began  to 
be  more  and  more  afraid  of  the  condemning  power  of  sin, 
and  my  lost  and    undone  condition.     I  then  engaged  more 
closely  into  morality  and  followed   my  duties ;  but  all  did 
not  take  away  the  fear  of  death  and  hell :    yea,  1  was   so 
burdened  at  times,  that  I  could  not  rest  in  my  bed ;  when 
I  had  been  to  any  frolick  or  into  carnal  company  I  was  of- 
ten afraid  to  close  my  eyes  for  fear  that  I  should  awake  in 
hell  before  morning,       I  was  one  of  the  most  unhappy 
^creatures  that  was  on  earth.     When  I    felt  the  least  disor- 
der in  my  body,  I  would  be  in  such  distress  that  1  could 
hardly  contain  myself,  expecting  that  God  was  about  to  call 
me  away»,and  I  unprepared  ;  fcfr  although  I  was  so  strict  in 
my  morals,  yet  my  religion  would  not  stand  by  me  in  a  time 
of  distress  or  when  death  slared  me  in  the  face.  Not  that  I 
thought  being  willing  to  die  is  sufficient  to  be  fit  to  die  ;  for 
the  wicked  have  no  bands  in  their  death,  but  when  a  man's 
eyes  are  open,  death  is  very  distressing,  without  an  evi- 
dence of  being  prepared. 

GOD  in  his  infinite  goodness  did  not  leave  me  to  rest 
on  a  form  of  religion,  but  still  gave  mc  a  sense  of  my  lo^r 

B 


u 


REV.  HKNRY  ALLINE  S 


and  undone  condition  in  a  great  degree  :  fcai  ing  almost  ev- 
ery thing  that  I  Baw,  that  it  wr.s  against  me,  commissioned 
from  God  to  call  me  away,  and  I  unprepared  :  I  was  even 
afraid  of  trees  falling  on  me,  when  I  was  in  the  woods,  and 
in  a  time  of  thunder  would  expect  that  the  next  flash  of  light- 
ning would  be  commissioned  to  cut  me  off.     Thus  I  was 
one  of  the  unhappiest  creatures  that  lived  on  earth;  and 
would  promise  and  vow,  in  time   of  danger,  that  I  would 
leave  all  my    carnal  mirth  and  vain  company,  and   that  I 
would  never  rest,  until  I   had  found  rest  to   my  soul:  but 
when  the  danger  appeared  to  be  over  I  would  soon  return 
to  my  folly,  though  not  without  great  reluctance  ;  for   the 
spirit  of  God  wrought  with  such  power  that  it  followed  me 
nig;ht  and  day,  when  I  was  in  company  or  when  I  was  retir- 
ed ;  but  I  was  so  attached  to  young  company  and  frolick- 
ing, that  it  seemed  like  parting  with  my  life  to  leave  them. 
Although  many  will  say,  they  must  wait  God's  time,  and 
and  wait  for  God's  irresistible  power  to  put  them  in  hh  way, 
and  they  wish  God's  time  was  come  ;  yet  for  my  part  I 
have  nothing  of  that  to  say,  for  I  knew  that  God  would  not 
mock  mc  ;  I  knew  that  he  followed  me  night  and  day  in- 
treating  me  to  forsake  all  and  accept  of  him  :  and  1  knew 
that  going  to  such  carnal  mirth,  and  hugging  my  idols  was 
against    his  spirit  and  against  my   everlasting  happiness  ; 
and  yet  I  would  go  and  hug  my  pleasures,  still  hoping  and 
praying    that  God  would   not    seize  the   forfeiture  at  my 
liands,  nor  leave  me  to  myself.     I  plead  that   God  would 
let  me  enjoy  my  pleasures  a  little  longer,  and  call  me  by 
and  by.     So  I  would  of  choice  put  off  the  Lord  whtn  going 
to  my   carnal  mirth   and  company,  would  pray  to  God 
not  to  cut  me  off,  when  I  got  there,  nor  suffer  me  to  give 
way  to  any  sin  ;  and  thus  I  have  not  only  stopped  to  pray 
as  I  \>  as  going,  but  sometimes  prayed  all  the  way,  that  God 
would  keep  me  from  sinning,  when  I  was  determined  to  go, 
and  rush  on  the  deyil's  ground.  I  knew  I  could  not  refrain 
myself  from  sinning  ;  yea  I  knew  it  was  sin  for  me  even  to 
go  in  such  company,  if  I  remained  wholly  passive,  when  I 
got  there  ;  as  I  promised  I  would.     O  the  subtlety  of  the 
devil  and  the  deceitfulness  of  man's  heart !  If  the  Lord  had 
not  been  infinite  in  mercy,  I  should  have  been  lost  for  ever ; 
for  I  still  continued  my  evi'  ways,  and  hugged  my   idols. 
Sometimes  when  I  knew  chat  a  great  frolick  was  intended, 
which  I  wanted  to  attend,  I  would  begin  for  sometime  be- 


LIFE   AND  JOURNAL. 


15 


(are  hand  and  keep  up  an  uncommon  watch  and  pray  more 
often  and  more  earnestly  ;  so  that  I  thoutjht  if  I  was  left  to 
be  something  rude  and  sinful,  wlien  I  i^ot  there,  for  the 
sake  of  keeping  up  my  name  among  the  polite  company  I 
should  not  feel  so  guilty  when  I  was  there,  or  when  I  came 
away  ;  and  although  I  was  thus  chained  to  the  covenant  of 
works,  yet  I  would  not  allow  myself  to  think  I  had  any  sclf- 
righteousncss,  but  intended  to  be  saved  by  free  gract. 
Thus  one  may  see  that  the  greatest  pbarisee  aiul  most 
strict  moralist  are  ignorant  of  it,  and  will  say,  that  thty 
expect  salvation  by  free  grace.  I  believe  thousands  si  id 
thousands  perish  there  forever,  and  go  down  to  their  graves 
depending  on  their  own  performances,  for  want  of  knowing 
what  it  is  to  depend  on,  and  receive  free  grace  ;  and  imag- 
ine they  do  it,  and  do  not  know  that  they  are  deceived,  until 
lost  to  all  eternity.  But  O  the  goodness  of  God  tome  a 
wretch  !  his  spirit  still  followed  me  and  would  not  suffer 
me  to  settle  down  ;  for  even  in  the  height  of  my  carnal 
mirth,  I  was  often,  while  on  the  floor  in  my  dance,  so  a- 
larmed  to  a  sense  of  my  condition,  that  I  could  hardly  con- 
tain myself,  seeing  that  I  was  rushing  against  the  bosses  of 
God*s  bucMer,  with  such  dreadful  views  of  the  gulph  of 
perdition  be»^eath  my  feet,  and  the  danger  ®f  my  being  cut 
off,  and  dropping  into  an  irrevocable  state,  that  1  have  often, 
while  in  the  dance,  cried  out  with  mental  cries, O  Lord  God, 
have  mercy  on  me,  have  mercy  on  me  !  and  do  not  cut  me 
off  in  my  sins.  Sometimes  I  would  leave  the  company, 
(often  speaking  to  the  fiddler  to  cease  from  playing,  as  if  I 
was  tired)  and  go  out  and  walk  about  crying  and  praying,  as 
if  my  very  heart  would  break?  and  beseeching  God,  that  he 
would  not  cut  me  off,  nor  give  me  up  to  hardnes<*  of  heart, 
but  spare  me,  until  I  was  brought  to  repentance :  yea 
1  had  now  such  a  sense  of  my  lost  and  undone  condition, 
and  the  emptiness  of  all  those  pleasures  and  earthly  en- 
joyments, that  I  did  not  attend  nor  carry  on  the  frolicks, 
because  I  found  any  happiness  or  sweetness  in  them,  but 
only  that  I  might  keep  up  my  credit  among  the  young  peo- 
ple, and  not  be  cast  out  of  their  esteem,  and  despised  by 
them  ;  and  I  would  make  an  excuse  of  that  before  God,  al- 
ledging  that  I  did  not  want  to  follow  them,  and  took  no 
pleasure  in  them,  but  that  I  must  and  thought  it  to  be  my 
duty  to  keep  good  fellowship  with  my  neighbors,  and  keep 
up  civil  society,  &c.  and  thus,  wretched  mortal  as  I  was,  I 


16 


REV.  HENRY  AIIlN't.  o 


continued  hugginj^  my  sins,  and  making  excuses  for 
ihem,  and  prayed  to  God  to  forgive  them  ;  still  being 
burdened  with  a  continual  load  of  guilt,  which  1  tried 
every  way  to  cover  or  expiate,  and  at  the  same  time 
pretended  that  I  was  depending  on  Christ.  I  was  now 
more  and  more  weaned  from  taking  any  delight  in  my 
carnal  company,  and  instead  of  ot  contriving  to  meet  them 
or  continue  uny  frolicks,  would  labom*  hard  to  obstruct 
them  by  many  f'xcuses  I  made,  but  did  not  tell  them  the 
cause  of  it ;  and  when  I  was  constrained  or  overpersuadcd 
to  meet  them,  and  dra>vn  out  to  dance  with  them,  I  woidd 
often  speak  to  the  fiddler  in  French,  to  desist  playiriL!,,  who 
would  make  some  excuse  to  them  (to  oblige  me)  that  he 
was  tired,  although  he  knew  nothing  of  the  cause  I  had 
of  so  doing,  and  would  break  up  the  diversion  as  soon  as 
I  could  ;  but  O  I  when  I  got  homr;  to  my  bed  chamber  I 
had  no  more  peace  or  rest  than  I  had  before,  so  that  I 
could  not  sleep  nor  hardly  lay  in  my  bed,  reflecting  on  my 
folly,  for  going  at  all,  knowing  certainly  if  I  was  to  die,  I 
should  immediately  drop  into  hell :  rolling  on  my  bed,  I 
would  call  for  mercy  and  pardon.  Spare  me,  spare  me,  O 
Lord  God,  and  cut  not  me  off;  forgive  me,  forgive  me,  O 
forgive  me,  or  I  am  gone  forever.  O  'hat  unhappy  hours 
and  nights  I  thus  wore  away,  and  my  wicked  heart  woukl 
not  bow,  and  though  I  was  one  of  the  most  unhappy 
men  on  earth,  yet  I  was  so  wicked  that  I  was  determined 
no  mortal  should  know  my  state,  lest  I  should  be  cast  out 
as  a  poor,  deluded,  melancholy  wretch  !  The  distress  of  my 
mind  was  so  great,  that  it  was  sometimes  almost  impossi- 
ble to  keep  it  concealed,  and  I  often  feared  that  the  distress 
of  my  soul  would  break  through  all  my  fortitude  ;  but  I  en- 
deavoured as  much  as  possible  to  dissemble  in  my  counte- 
nance. When  1  met  sometimes  with  meriy  companions^ 
and  my  heart  was  ready  to  sink,  I  would  labor  to  put  on  as 
cheerful  a  countenance  as  possible,  that  they  might  not  dis- 
trust any  thing  was  the  matter,  and  sometimes  would  begin 
some  discourse  with  young  men  or  young  women  on  pur- 
pose, or  propose  a  merry  song,  lest  the  distress  of  my  soul 
would  be  discovered,  or  mistrusted,  when  at  the  same  time 
it  was  a  grief  to  my  very  heart  to  hear  of  any  vain  or  carnal 
mirth,  and  would  then  rather  have  been  in  a  wilderness  in 
exile,  than  with  them  or  any  of  their  pleasures  or  enjoy- 
mcrits.  Thus  for  many  months  when  I  was  in  company,  I 
would  act  the  hypocrite  and  feign  a  men  y  heart,  but  at  the 


i 


i 


,J>r 


n. 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


ir 


s   for 
being 
tried 
timti 
>  now 
n  my 
them 
struct 
1)  the 
viacU.d 
would 
;,  who 
I'dt  he 
I  had 
»on  as 
nber  I 
that  I 
on  my 
die,  I 
bed,  I 
me,  O 
me,  O 
hours 
woukl 
ihappy 
•mined 
ist  out 
iof  my 
fipossi- 
istress 
it  I  en- 
;ounte- 
anions^ 
on  as 
aot  dis- 
d  begin 
>n  pur- 
ny  soul 
e  time 
carnal 
ness  in 
enjoy- 
pany,  I 
t  at  the 


r 


i 


I 


,^ 


same  time  would  endeavour  as  much  as  I  could,  without 
giving  them  reason  to  suspect   me,  sliun  their  company. 

0  wretched  and  unhappy  mortal  that  I  was  l  Every  thing 

1  did,  and  whe^evcr  1  ^vent,  I  was  still  in  a  storm,  and 
yet  was  taken  to  be  one  of  ihe  most  careless,  merry,  and 
light  hearted  youths  in  the  whole  town.  And  indeed  I  con- 
tinued to  be  the  chief  contriver  and  ringleader  of  the  frol- 
icks  for  many  months  after ;  though  it  was  a  toil  and  tor- 
ment to  attend  them ;  but  the  devil  and  my  o\\'n  wicked 
heart  drove  me  about  like  a  slave,  telling  me  that  I  must  do 
this  and  do  that,  and  bear  this  and  bear  that,  and  turn  here 
and  turn  there,  to  keep  my  credit  up,  and  retain  the  esteem 
of  my  associates  r  and  all  this  while  I  continued  as  strict 
as  possible  in  my  duties,  and  left  no  stone  unturned  to  paci- 
fy my  conscience,  watching  even  against  my  thoughts,  and 
praying  continually  wherever  I  went :  for  I  did  not  think 
there  was  any  sin  in  my  coi.duct,  when  I  was  among  carnal 
company,  because  I  did  not  take  any  satisfaction  there,  but 
only  followed  it,  I  thought,  for  sufficient  reasons. 

But  still  all  that  I  did  or  could  do,  conscience  would 
roar  night  and  day.  About  this  time,  after  repeated  coun- 
sels and  admonitions  of  my  faithful  parents,  I  went  home 
one  morning  about  two  or  three  o'clock,  when  all  was  in 
bed,  and  I  hoped  asleep,  because  I  feared  an  admonition  : 
however  my  parents,  although  awake,  acted  the  prudent 
part,  not  to  speak  to  me  then  ;  fearing,  I  suppose,  that  I  was 
then  warm  with  my  carnal  passions,  and  omitted  their  re- 
proof till  the  morning.  When  the  morning  came,  I  was  in 
hopes  it  would  pass  by,  but  no  ;  for  although  I  had  endeav- 
oured to  shun  giving  them  an  opportunity,  as  much  as  I 
could,  yet  when  I  came  to  the  table  at  breakfast,  they  were 
wise  enough  to  improve  the  opportunity,  and  began  in  a  ve- 
ry tender  but  emphatical  manner  to  reprove  me  for  my 
conduct.  After  1  had  endeavoured  to  vindicate  my  conduct 
as  much  as  possible,  telling  them,  that  I  was  not  guilty  of 
any  thing  criminal  or  openly  vicious  ;  and  that  it  was  only  a 
simple  recreation,  that  was  allowablfe,  my  mother  replied, 
that  although  I  might  not  be  guilty  of  any  thing  openly  vi- 
cious or  criminal ;  yet  it  vv^as  opening  a  door,  that  would 
soon  lead  me  to  it ;  and  that  she  expected  nothing  less,  but 
that  if  I  continued,  I  should  soon  be  guilty  of  almost  every 
^ce ;  and   eternally  ruined  both  in  soul  and  body :  and; 

B2 


18 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINh'a 


speaking  in  behalf  of  herself  and  my  father,  who  was  thc:i 
at  the  table  and  engaged  in  the  discourse  with  her,  she 
said,  Well,  if  you  are  determined  to  take  no  advice,  but  will 
have  your  own  way,  remember  that  it  will  not  affect  our 
happiness.  We  can  but  advise  you,  and  warn  you  of  your 
danger,  but  if  you  will  go  to  hell  and  be  forever  miscra- 

~*  ble,  remember  you  go  for  yourself ;  and  further  signified, 
that  they  should  be  as  witnesses  against  me,  at  that  great 
and  dreadful  day.  O  those  words  were  like  pointed  arrows 
to  my  inmost  soul,  and  struck  the  greatest  blow  that  e^  er 
I  had  struck,  to  cut  off  my  frolicking  (although  1  did  not 
wholly  break  off.)  What,  said  I  to  myself,  shaJl  1  one  day 
see  my  parents,  (whom  1  do  love  as  niy  own  life)  hi  heaven 
saying  to  my  condemnation,  while  I  am  in  hell  r  O  how 
can  I  bear  the  thoughts  of  that  I  I  then  immediately  went  out 
of  the  house,  walked  about  in  the  field,  crying  and  praying, 
as  if  my  heart  would  break.  What,  said  I  repeatedly,  shall 
my  parents  go  to  heaven  and  I  to  hell,  and  they  rejoicing 
-  to  see  me  miserable  I  O  shocking  thought  indeed  ! 

I  NOW  renewed  my  engagement  for  a  reformation  and 
watchfulness,  and  was  almost  ready  to  promise,  that  I  would 
never  go  to  any  more  ofjthese  carnal  frolicks.  I  now  kept 
more  close  to  my  duties  than  ever  I  did,  praying  six  or  sev- 
en times  a  day.  I  have  reason  to  bless  God,  that  I  was  not 
left  to  split  on  that  rock  ;  a  rock  oa  which  I  believe  thou- 
sands and  tliousands  perish  to  all  eternity.  I  remained  yet 
in  inexpressible  distress,  finding  no  rest  to  my  troubled 
mind.     The  devil  now  set  in  with  the  cutting  temptation, 

f-^  that  I  was  not  elected,  and  was  the  only  cause,  why  I  was 
not  converted,  or  had  not  been  converted  long  ago.  God 
had  chosen  a  certain  number,  which  would  certainly  be 
saved  to  eternal  life,  and  tisc  rest  were  left  and  could  not 
possibly  be  saved,  do  what  they  would  ;  yea,  he  persuaded 
me  to  believe,  thai  God  by  some  unalterable  decree  had  put 
it  out  of  his  power  to  redeem  mc,  and  therefore  I  must  ce  r- 
tainly  perish  to  all  eternity.  A  doctrine  too  much  preached 
up  by  those  that  are  the  ambassadors  of  Christ  as  well  as 
by  the  devil.  There  is  no  tongue  caii  express,  but  of  those 
that  have  experienced  it,  the  unspeakable  distress  I  was  un- 
der. O,  to  think  that  my  eternal  state  was  already  fixed 
in  misery  beyond  any  alteration  or  recovery  !  O  the 
thoughts  of  being  a  vessel  of  wrath  to  all  eternity  !  This 
brought  me  to  reflect  on  the  divine  Being  j  for  as  I  thought 


s 


>t- 


'■m 


1 


s  llieu 
r,  she 
at  will 
:t  our 
>f  your 
liscra- 

t  great 

ill'OWS 

It  ever 
lid  not 
lie  dav 
heaven 
)  how 
enl  out 
raying, 
y,  shall 
joicing 

ion  and 
[  would 
w  kept 
or  sev- 
tvas  not 
;  thou- 
ned  yet 
roubled 
ptation, 
I  was 
God 
inly  be 
uld  not 
suaded 
iiad  put 
list  ce  1 - 
:eached 
well  as 
of  those 
was  un- 
y  fixed 
O    the 
»  This 
hought 


LIFL  AND  JOURMAL, 


19 


1 


;f.  cruelty,  I  could  hardly  contain  myseirfromhlasphcmintj 
and  ciirbin^- the  Ciod  that  made  nie  ;  and  did  really  wish 
many  a  time  from  my  very  soul,  that  I  had  never  been 
born  ;  yea,  I  envied  every  beast,  stock  or  stone  I  cast  wvj 
eyes  upon.  I  thought  O  if  God  had  been  so  kind  to  me  as 
to  them,  how  happy  1  should  have  been  ;  but  no,  he  has  giv- 
en me  a  soul  to  exist  forever,  and  put  me  beyond  a  possibil- 
ity of  rediimption.  Thus  I  was  filled  with  blasphemous 
thoughts  and  reflections  against  God.  O  how  strong  is  tlie 
Power  of  Darkness  in  the  fallen  soul  of  man  I  And  if  there 
is  so  much  guilt  and  darkness  appearing  now  while  in  this 
imi>risoned  state,  what  will  be  the  rage  of  the  ungodly,  when 
they  ere  beyond  all  restrtunt,  and  awake  like  themselves  in 
their  own  hellish  darkness  and  rage.  O  the  deplorable  state 
of  tiie  fallen  race  I 

After  a  while  I  began  to  hare  a  hope,  that  there  was 
a  possibility  of  God's  saving  me,  and  therefore  I  would 
try  :  but  O  it  was  but  a  little  hope  or  expectatio»i ;  and 
thus  I  continued  the  most  unhappy  wretch  that  walked 
upon  the  earth  ;  knowing  that  (iod,  who  1  thought  acted 
altogether  as  an  arbitrary  sovereign,  was  to  summon  me 
away  by  death,  I  was  gone  to  all  eternity  ;  and  although  I 
was  thus  exposed,  every  breath  I  drew,  to  keen  and  ever- 
lasting despair,  yet  I  was  not  willing  to  be  saved  on  the 
«  terms  of  '.he  gospel ;  that  is,  cast  myself  wholly  on  free 
grace,  and  thought  all  this  time,  that  God  was  not  willing 
to  save  me.  Thus  I  continued  begging  for  mercy  and 
fighting  against  it  at  the  same  time. 

By  this  time  I  had  read,  studied  and  disputed  so  much, 
that  I  had  acquired  a  great  theoi  y  of  religion,  and  spent 
much  time  disputing  on  the  controverted  points,  such  as 
election,  reprobation,  resurrection,  baptism,  Sec  although  1 
never  let  any  one  know,  that  I  was  any  way  concerned  a- 
bout  them  ;  and  I  thought,  I  was  capable  to  liold  an  argu- 
ment with  any  one  that  I  could  find  :  but  instead  of  getting 
my  rest,  I  only  increased  my  distress,  for  I  thought  I  could 
deceive  the  very  elect.  Oftentimes  when  I  went  to  bed 
after  I  had  been  disputing  with  my  parents,  I  felt  so  nmch 
guilt  and  distress  on  my  mind,  that  it  seemed  I  cciikl  not 
^  continue  in  the  body,  thinking  how  I  had  deceived  them ; 
but  found  I  was  not  willing  they  should  know  my  state.  I 
now  promised  that  if  ever  I  discoursed  again  with  my  par- 
ents, I  would  discover  to  them  my  state  j  but  O  my  wick- 


20 


, », 


REV,  HENRY  ALLINL  S 


ed  heart  kept  back ;  and  wliat  made  it  more  hard  for  mt 
to  speak  and  manifest  my  condition  was  the  darkness  of 
the  time  ;  it  was  a  time  oi:  Ejjyptian  darkness.  I  have 
reason  to  l)elieve  there  were  no  more  than  five  or  six  chris- 
tians in  tlie  wliole  town,  and  they  snnk  into  death  and  form- 
ahty  :  there  was  notliing  of  the  power  of  rehgion,  the  tra- 
vail of  the  soul ;  and  conviction  and  conversion  v/ere  scarce- 
ly mentioned  ;  only  externals,  and  duties,  and  commands, 
and  different  principles,  Sec.  1  read  of  mr.ny  experiences 
and  aixoutits  ot  a  work  of  grace  in  the  souls  of  others,  and 
therefore  knew  tiiat  i  liad  no  portion  in  the  kingdom  of 
heaven  :  and  when  1  re^d  of  many  that  were  converted  in 

-T  the  former  reformation,  and  that  in  a  short  time  ;  some  be- 
ing but  a  few  days  under  conviction  and  brought  out  re- 
joicing ;  I  would  then  miu'mur  against  God,  because  he  did 
not  convert  me  ;  and  thought,  if  I  was  a  sinner,  I  was  not 
worse,  nor  hardly  so  bad,  as  many  of  them  had  been.  But 
oh  I  little  knew  what  I  was,  nor  what  I  was  harbouring : 
the  evil  oi  my  own  heart  was  yet  undiscovered  :  I  little 
knew  that  I:  was  a  hell  and  damnation  to  myself  in  my  own 
nature:  I  little  knew  that  God  was  more  willing  to  save 
me,  than  I  was  to  be  saved.  O  the  blindness  and  ignorance 
in  the  ways  and  nature  of  God  I  was  in  ;  I  knew  I  must  be- 
lieve ;  yea  it  is  held  by  many,  that  if  I  could  once  get  God 
to  be  willing,  I  should  be  sure  of  salvation  :  and  it  ii-  the 
thoughts  of  thousands,  who  profess  to  be  christians,  that 
they  must  labour  hard  to  prevail  with  God  to  have  mercy 
on  his  creatures,  as  if  he  was  scant  in  his  blessings,  and 
sparing  in  his  mercy,  and  therefore  he  was  to  be  prevailed 
with  by  effective  arguments,  to  give  consent,  that  the  bless- 
ing should  be  gi\  en,  as  if  his  mind  was  thereby  changed, 
when  it  is  wholly  the  revei'se  ;  for  his  nature  is  such  that 
he  cannot  be  but  merciful,  and  willing  to  do  good  to  all  his 
creatures  ;  and  there  is  nothing  keeps  it  from  awakened 
sinners,but  their  own  stubborn  will,  which  debars  them  frv.m 
his  love,  and  it  would  be  proper  to  plead  with  God   to  re- 

.  move  our  opposition; 
S-  One  evening  as  I  was  taking  a  walk  of  about  two  or 
"^  three  miles  to  spend  the  evening  ^vith  some  of  my  com- 
panions (as  I  had  promised)  being  alone  and  pondering  on 
my  lost  and  undone  condition,  as  I  was  at  this  time  almost' 
night  and  day,  the  evening  was  very  dark,  but  all  on  a  sud- 
den I  thought  I  was  surrounded  with  an  uncommon  light  y 


LIFE   AND  JOURNAL. 


'2  1 


n 


It  seemed  like  a  blaze  o'  fire  ;  I  thoujijht  it  out  shone  the  sun 
at  noon  day  :   I  was  iuimcdiattly  plunged  almost  in   kctn 
despair.     The  first  conception    1   had   was  that  the   «;rcat 
day  of  judgment  was  come,  and  time  at  apciiod.     O   what 
unspeakable   horrors  broke  I'orlU   immediately  upon    my 
soul  :  every   power  of  my  mind  strained  with  terror  and 
surprise.     I  thouirht  the  day  of  grace  was  now  over,  mercy 
ahuscc',  goodness  rejected,  time  at  a  period,  eternity  com- 
nieu'  ed,  the  infinite  judge  approaching,  conscience  awake, 
and  my  soul  burdened  with  almost  v:\  unsupportablc  loud 
of  i;uilt,  darkness  and  tormenting  fear,  and  a  bottomless 
i^uif  beneath  me.  All  this  appeared  as  real  as  if  it  were  actu- 
ally so.     I  thought  I  saw  thousands  of  devils  and    damned 
spirits,  by  whom  I  expected  to  be    tormented.     No  friend, 
no  Saviour,  no  Mediator  1  He  that  made  me  would  have  no 
mercy  on  me,  and  he  that  formed    me   would  shew  me    no 
favour;  and  yet  I  clearly  saw  that  his  throne  was  just  and 
"wholly  clear  of  my  blood.     I  had   nothing    to  lay    to    his 
charge,  for  I  sawjhow  I  had  wilfully  refused  his  grace,  and 
rejected  his  mercy  :  all  times    and  opportunities    of  repen- 
tance were  now  at  a  period,  and  nothing   but  loss,  loss,  in- 
cessant loss,  like  a  dagger  shot  through  my  poor  distressed 
and  almost  despairing   soul.      Thus  God  shewed  me    in 
some  degree  for  about  three  quarters  of  a  minute,  what  it 
would  be  to  meet  that  dreadful  day  in  the  condition  I  vr&s 
then  in,  without  a  Saviour ;    and  therefore  informed  me 
how  exposed  I  was  at  every  breath  I  drew,  and  what  ai 
awful  day  I  must  soon  see,  if  I  am  found  out  of  Christ ; 
yea,  methinks  I  saw  more  in  that  short  time  than  I  could 
express  in  one  week.     I  stood  all  this  time  with  my  face 
towards  the  ground,  trembling  in  body,  and  sinking  in  my 
mind,  not  having  power  to  look,  nor  desire  to  ask  for  mer- 
cy, because  I  thought  the  case  was  really  settled  with  me, 
and  therefore  it  would  be  needless  to  ask  for  mercy,  es- 
pecially when  I  saw  myself  so  justly  condemned  ;  and  O 
too  late  I  was  convinced  of  r  /  folly.     My  distress  was  sa 
great  that  I  believe  it  continued  hall  an  hour,  as  it  would 
have  separated  my  soul  from  my  body,  for  my  very  flesh 
seemed  to  consume  off  of  my  bones  with  the  weight ;  every 
thing  conspiring  to  load  me  with  unspeakable  distress. 
O  what  u  day  !  iiow  will  the  wicked  stand, 
When  scenes  immortal  open  to  their  view  ? 
All  time  deserted,  mortal  changes  past, 
And  they  awake  before  the  awful  Bar, 
Where  Grace  and  Hope  to  them  arQ  known  no  more 


22 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINK's 


Tmk  firr.t  thout^ht  I  remember,  exclusive  of  reviewing- 
the  shocliinj^  scene,  was  to  lool^  behind  me  and  see  how  fur 
the  ijurnin^  llojd  und  sweeping  dehi^e,  which  I  imagined 
to  be  coming  after  me,  was  from  me,  that  I  might  know 
how  long  I  should  be  out  of  hell,  or  how  long  it  would  be, 
before  my  doom  shovdd  be  hnally  settled.     When  I  lifted 
up  my  eyes,  I  saw,  to  my  unspeakable  satisfaction,  that  it 
was  not  as  I  expected  :  the  day  was  not  really  come,  there- 
fore I  had  an   opportunity  of  repentance,  and  a  possibility 
of  escaping  from  that  awful  and  eternal  gulf.     O  how  my 
heart  seemed  to  leap  for  joy,  and  at  the  same  time  began  to 
groan  for  mt:rcy.     I  found  the  day  of  judgment  was  not 
come,  nor  the  world  in  flames  as  I  expected.     There  ap- 
peared, as  I  thought,  a  large  blaze  of  light  in  the  shape  of  a 
circle,  with  that  side  next  to  me  open  us  though  it  yawned 
after  me,  and  as  it  drew  very  nigh  me,  it  closed  up  in  a 
small  compass,  then  broke  out  in  small  sparkles,  and  van- 
ished away.    It  is  no  matter  whether  the  light,  which  I  savr 
with  my  bodily  eyes,   was  one  of  the  common  phenomena 
of  nature,  such  as  exhaled  vapours  or  nitre,  that  had  gathered 
in  the  air ;  it  was  not  the  less  alarming  to  me  ;  for  I  believe 
it  was  really  designed  by  God  as  an  alarming  means,  as 
much  as  if  it  was  a  miracle  sent  to  me  in  particular.     We 
are  very  apt  to  evade  the  force  of  many  alarming  calls  from 
God  by  such  things  as  are  not  uncommon  in  nature. 

When  the  light  seemed  to  vanish,  and  the  scene  to 
withdraw,  my  whole  soul  seemed  to  be  engaged  to  implore 
mercy  and  grace.  O  mercy,  mercy,  mercy,  was  every 
groan  of  my  soul,  and  1  began  to  make  many  promises, 
that  I  would  never  hear  to  sin  as  I  had  done,  nor  rest  another 
day,  unless  I  had  found  a  Saviour  for  my  poor  soul.  I 
thought  very  much  of  the  goodness  of  God  to  me  in  giving 
me  one  moment  more  for  repentance,  and  that  there  ap- 
peared yet  a  possibility  of  my  being  saved. 

In  that  distressing  moment  how  I  stood         '' 
On  the  tremendous  verge  of  endless  death  ! 
While  rending  horrors  from  approaching  ruin. 
And  hellish  fancies,  poison'd  with  despair, 
And  rappid  torrents  pierc'd  my  bleeding  soul.    . 
O  far  beyond  what  mortal  tongue  can  say  ! 
•    Till  the  Almighty,  with  a  breeze  of  hope, 

Calm'd  all  the  storra,  and  bid,  tho'  dire,  be  still. 
To  whose  great  name,  ten  thousand  thanks  are  due. 
I  THINK  1  was   determined  to   spend  my  remaining 
moments  at  the  door  of  mercy,  begging  for  redeeming  lo.ve> 


i 


I  irK   ANT)  JOURKAL. 


ts 


and  if  I  never  finind  inciry,  to  ^o  down  to  the  t^ravc  mourn- 
ing,and  die  a  beggar.  1  went  to  the  house  1  intended, l)Ut  diil 
not  join  in  any  diversion  :  1  told  what  1  had  seen,  but  not 
what  effect  it  had  on  me.  I  did  not  stav  lonr  there,  for  niv 
distress  was  so  ^reat,  that  I  returned  and  went  home  to  my 
father's.  When  1  came  there,  thev  were  all  in  hed.  I 
went  to  my  bed-room,  and  rryinc^  tor  mercy  like  a  jierson 
in  agony.  1  had  still  a  clear  view  of  what  I  had  seen  and 
what  it  was  sent  for  ;  neither  did  I  think,  that  I  could  ever 
dose  my  eyes,  until  I  found  some  relief;  but  ()  the  subtil- 
ty  of  the  devil  and  the  deceitfulness  of  my  own  heart !  I 
liad  not  been  long  in  the  room,  before  there  was  represent- 
ed to  my  view  a  beautiful  woman  (on',*  whom  I  had  seen  be- 
fore, but  had  no  great  acquaintance  with)  and  the  happiness 
that  I  thought  I  might  enjoy  with  her  stole  away  my  af- 
fections from  thinking  much  of  (lod  or  my  st^ite.  The 
devil  told  me  that  I  need  not  commit  any  sin  for  to  enjoy 
her  ;  that  I  might  marry  her,  which  was  lawful  :  yea,  I  so 
acquiesced  in  the  temptation,  that  my  aflections  were  after 
her,  and  she  appeared  the  most  beautiful  object  that  ever 
I  beheld.  My  passions  were  so  inflamed  with  the  pros- 
pect, that  I  thought  I  would  not  omit  the  first  opportunity 
to  go  to  see  her  and  propose  marriage  to  her,  1  thought 
1  would  be  the  happiest  man  on  earth,  if  I  might  but  have 
her  for  a  companion  for  life.  O  the  subtilty  of  that  grand 
adversary,  who  might  by  this  temptation  have  proved  my 
eternal  ruin,  if  God  had  not  interposed.  And  I  believe 
many  souls  are  ruined  so  for  evt  r,  who  in  time  of  distress, 
and  under  some  convictions,  will  turn  away  after  the  en- 
joyments of  the  creature,  under  a  pretension  of  going  in 
the  way  of  duty.  I  had  almost  forgot  my  distress  and  un- 
speakable danger,  but  blessed  be  God,  after  I  had  been  a- 
bout  half  an  hour  captivated  wit!i  the  delusive  prospect,  he 
stepped  in  for  my  help,  and  by  his  blessed  spirit  struck  my 
heart  with  conviction  of  my  state  and  the  dangerous  snare 
I  was  plunging  myself  in  ;  he  shewed  me  that  I  was  on 
'  the  devil's  aground,  and  far  from  performing  the  vows  I  had 
so  lately  made  ;  and  at  the  same  time  convinced  me  that  if 
I  remained  in  the  state  I  was  in,  i  must  soon  meet  in  real- 
ity, what  I  had  a  faint  representation  of,  and  that  if  I  give 
way  to  this  snare  i  n>ight  grieve  the  holy  spirit,  and  that 
it  might  prove  the  means  of  my  eternal  ruin  ;  and  blessed 
be  his  name,  I  was  not  only  made  to  see  the  temptation, 


K    I 


34 


RF.V.    HEKRY    AI.LINE's 


but  likewise  to  detest  it  from  my  very  heart,  and  enabled 
to  withstand  it.  I  almost  spoke  out  with  an  audible  voice, 
saying,  get  thee  behind  me  Satan,  for  I  see  the  snare  ;  at  the 
same  time  also  saying,  I  will  not  go,  I  will  not  go,  neither 
will  I  think  of  marrying  or  enjoying  any  thing  in  this 
'  world,  until  (if  God  gives  me  grace)  I  find  a  Saviour  for 
my  soul ;  for  what  wi'll  all  these  enjoyments  J^vail  me  in  a 
dying  hour. 

1  WAS  now  more  distressed  than  ever  ;  for  I  saw  more 
and  more  my  danger,  and  the  necessity  of  an  Almighty 
Friend  to  stand  by  me  for  time  and  eternity.  I  spent  not 
only  almost  all  that  night,  but  also  the  next  day  and  many 
days  and  nights,  being  bowed  down  with  guilt  and  dark- 
ness, crying  for  mercy.  O  mercy,  mercy  for  my  preciou* 
and  immortal  soul. 

I  NOW  began  to  be  tried  with  another  very  heavy 
temptation,  which  was,  that  I  had  committed  the  unpar- 

I     donable  sin,  and  therefore  was  certainly  gone,  gone  for  ever. 

/  I  remembered,  that  at  a  certain  time  some  years  ago,  when 
I  was  in  company  with  some  young  women,  who  were 
making  a  derision  at  people's  waiting  for  the  moving  of  the 
Spirit,  I  joined  with  them  in  the  laughter  and  mockery,  and 
although  it  was  the  spirit  of  God  that  convinced  me  of  this 
sin  and  gave  me  a  great  sense  of  the  evil  of  it,  yet  the  de- 
vil now  set  in  and  told  me  that  it  was  the  unpardonable  sin  ; 
for  when  I  was  convinced  that  I  had  made  a  mock  of  re- 
ligion, and  made  light  of  speaking  reproachfully  of  the 
moving  of  the  Spirit ;  he  said  it  was  the  Spirit  of  God  I  had 
made  a  mock  of,  and  therefore  was  lost  forever  ;  for  all 
blasphemy  against  the  Father  and  Son  may  be  forgiven, 
but  the  blasphemy  against  the  Holy  Ghost  can  never  be 
forgiven,  neither  in  this  world,  nor  the  world  to  come.  O 
the  distress  I  was  now  in  !  The  thoughts  of  being  lost  be- 
yond recovery  would  rack  almost  my  soul  anr'  body  asun- 
der, and  I  thought  I  would  gi'^e  ten  thousand  vorldb,  if  I 
had  them,  to  recall  what  I  had  done.  O  h(.vv  it  would 
rack  me  night  and  day  ;  but  it  was  done,  and  I  could  not  re- 
call it  ;  yea,  and  the  devil  was  telling  me  that  I  had  sin- 
ned against  light  and  with  malice,  and  tlierefore  it  could 
not  be  forgiven  me  :  but  though  I  did  not  know  tl  en,  that 
there  was  any  thing  in  my  favour,  yet  my  being  so  dis- 
tressed for  fear  that  I  had  committed  that  sin,  and  tliat  I 
was  so  desirous  to  recall  it,  was  a  sufficient  evidence,  that 


I,irr.  AKD  JOURNAL. 


25 


enabled 
e  voice, 
;  at  the 
neither 
in  this 
lour  for 
ne  in  a 

a.w  more 
.Imighty 
pent  not 
nd  many 
nd  dark- 
preciout 

ry  heavy 
le  unpar- 
i  for  ever, 
igo,  when 
vho  were 
ing  of  the 
:kery,  and 
me  of  this 
t   the  de- 
nable  sin ; 
ck  of  re- 
lly  of  the 
God  I  had 
;    for   all 
forgiven, 
never   be 
:ome.     O 
ig  lost  be- 
aody  asun- 
orldb,  if  I 
it  would 
aild  not  re- 
had  sin- 
hM    it  could 
tl  en,  that. 
ng  so  dis- 
and  that  1 
dence,  that 


I 


H 


I  had  not  committed  it,  as  1  have  been  taught  since.     At    "^ 
length  it  pleased  God  to  relieve  me  from  this  temptation, 
by  shewing  me  that  I  had  not  committed  it  out  of  malice 
or  s^iite,  neither  had  I  much  light  at  that  time. 

My  distress  continued  still  night  and  day  ;    and  O 
what  days  and  hours  of  grief  and  trial   1  waded  through, 
being  locked  up  in  darkness,  and  a  stranger  to  all  joy  and 
happiness.     Every  thing  1  saw  :>eemed  to  be  a  burden  to 
me  ;  the  earth  seemed  accursed  for  my  sake  :  all  trees, 
plants,  rocks,  hills  and  vales  seemed  to  be  drest  in  mourn- 
ing, and  groaning,  under  the  weight  of  the  curse,  anderery 
thing  around  me  seemed  to  be  conspiring  my  ruin.  My  sins 
seemed  to  be  laid  open  ;  so  that  I  thought  that  every  one  I 
saw  knew  them,  and  sometimes  I  was  almost  ready  to  ac- 
knowledge many  things,  which  I  thought  they  knew  :  yea 
sometimes  it  seemed  to  me  as  if  every  one  was  pointing 
me  out  as  the  most  guilty  wr«itch  on  earth,     I  had  now  so 
great  a  sense  of  the  vanity  and  emptiness  of  all  things  here 
below,  that  I  knew  the  whole  world  could  not  possibly  make 
me  happy,  no,  nor  the  whole  system  of  creation.     Thus 
seeing  that  there  was  not  a  possibility  of  happiness  in  all 
the  creation,  and  none  to  be  enjoyed  in  God  or  his  ways  (as 
that  appeared  to  me  the  only  shelter  from  misery)  I  thought 
it  was  a  cruel  thing  in  God  to  make  me  or  any  other  im- 
mortal spirit  of  such  a  capacity,  as  I  found  I  had  ;  for  I 
thought  he  had  made  hungry   souls  but  nothing  to  feed 
them  ;  for  I  could  not  see  any  thing  to  feed  me  or  make 
me  happy,  and  therefore  must  be  miserable  forever.     In- 
deed it  is  so  great  a  truth,  that  all  mankind  have  hungry 
souls,  which  nothing  can  satisfy  or  feed  but  (iod  himself, 
that  I  would  to  God,  those  who  profess  to  be  the  Ministers 
of  Christ,  would  labour  to  convince  their  hearers  of  the 
disordered,  distressed,  hungry  and  self-tormenting  nature 
of  their  own  immortal  souls  ;  instead  of  telling  them,  that 
God  is  revengeful  and  vindictive,  and  that  they  must  go  to 
this  and  that  duty,  and  forsake  this  and  that  sin  to  please 
God,  or  to  get  him  reconciled  to  them  :  for  although  it  was 
contrary  to  what  our  ministers  preached  in  those  days,  yet 
the  spirit  that  convinced  me  shewed  me,  if  I  could  com- 
mand ten  thousand  worlds,  it  would  be  all  in  vain,  for  it 
could  not  give  my  soul  one  hour's  peace. 

C 


4 


26 


RtV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


'i 


f  ! 


;,(- , 


Wherever  I  went,  or  whatever  I  did,  night  or  day, 
I  was  groaning  under  a  load  of  guilt  and  darkness,  praying 
and  crying  continually  for  mercy  ;  yea  I  would  often  be  so 
intent  in  prayer,  that  when  1  met  any  one  in  the  street,  I 
would  be  praying,  until  I  spoke  to  him,  and  as  soon  as  I 
left  him,  would  immediately  begin  again  to  cry  within  my- 
self for  mercy,  mercy,  mercy.  Lord  God,  have  mercy  on 
me  :  and  while  I  was  in  company,  was  so  distressed  and 
sui  k  in  spirit,  that  I  could  scarcely  keep  the  anguish  of  my 
soul  concealed ;  and  would  often,  as  much  as  1  possibly 
could,  counterfeit  a  cheerful  countenance,  lest  I  should  be 
discovered  ;  and  thus  for  hours,  being  in  company  I  have 
exercised  all  the  fortitude  I  was  master  of,  to  keep  the 
storm  within  under  a  suppression.  When  I  waked  in  the 
morning,  the  first  thouglit  would  be,  O  my  wretched  soul, 
what  shall  I  do,  where  ahall  I  go  ?  and  when  I  laid  down, 
would  say»  I  shall  be  perhaps  in  hell  before  morning.  I 
would  man)  times  look  on  the  beasts  with  envy,  wishing  with 
all  my  heart  I  was  in  their  place,  that  I  might  have  no  soul 
to  lose  ;  and  when  I  have  seen  birds  flying  over  my  head, 
have  often  thought  within  myself,  O  that  I  could  fly  away 
from  my  danger  and  distress  I  O  how  happy  should  I  be,  if 
1  were  in  their  place.  O  how  hard  it  is  for  the  stubborn 
will  to  bow,  and  the  v/icked  to  come  down  and  give  up  all. 
They  often  imagine  that  they  are  willing  to  receive  God's 
grace  and  God  is  not  willing,  but  it  is  quite  the  reverse. 
He  standeth,  saith  the  prophet,  behind  our  walls.  We  have 
reason,  both  saints  and  sinners,  to  cry  to  God  continually 
to  take  away  the  opposition  of  our  will,  our  own  stubborn 
will,  and  the  corruption  of  our  nature,  that  God's  grace  and 
love  might  enter  in  ;  as  it  certainly  would,  as  soon  as  all 
is  given  up  :  and  this  necessity  of  praying,  watching  and 
wrestling,  is  wrought  in  the  soul  by  the  spirit  of  God,  to 
subdue  and  destroy  the  rejecting  nature  and  stubborn  will 
in  the  creature,  that  the  meek  and  lov<y  Jesus  n^gh  enter 
in.  But  I  knew  nothing  of  all  this  at  that  time,  but  thought 
that  God  could  bring  me  in  by  an  arbitrary  power  when  he 
pleased,  but  would  not. 

Fkdr'Jauy  13th,  1775,  when  about  midnight  I 
waked  out  of  sleep,  I  was  surprised  by  a  most  alarm- 
ing call  as  with  a  small  still  voice,  as  it  were  through 
TL\y  whole  soul  ;  as  if  it  spoke  these  words.  How  many 
days  and  weeks,  and   months  and  years  has  God  been 


i 


'  day, 

aying 

be  so 

eet,  1 

I  as  1 

ill  my- 

•cy  on  ^ 

d   and 

iofmy 

lossibly 

ould  be 

1  have 

;ep  the 

d  in  the 

ed  soul, 

d  down, 

ing.      1 

ing  with 

;  no  soul 

ny  head, 

fly  away 

,d  I  be,  if 

stubborn 

ve  up  all. 

ve  God's 
reverse. 

We  have 

)ntinually 
stubborn 
^race  and 
)n  as  all 
ing  and 
God,  to 
iorn  will 
igh  enter 
it  thought 
when  he 

(dnight   I 

5t   alarm - 

through 

)\v  many 

,od  been 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


27 


striving  with  you,  and  you  have  not  yet  accepted,  but 
i*emain  as  far  from  redemption  as  at  first  ;  and  us  God  has 
declared,  that  his  spirit  shall  not  always  strive  with  man, 
what  if  he  woiiki  ( all  you  no  more,  and  this  might  be  tiic 
last  call,  as  possibly  it  might  be  ;  what  would  your  unhap- 
py doom  be  ?  O  how  it  pierced  my  whole  soul,  and  caus- 
ed me  to  tremble  in  my  bed,  and  cry  out  for  a  longer  t  ne. 
O  Lord  God  do  not  take  away  thy  spirit  I  O  leavt  me  acX, 
leave  me  not ;  give  me  not  ever  to  hardness  of  heart,  and 
blindness  of  mind.  Sleep  was  for  some  time  driven  from  my 
eyes,  and  I  thought  I  would  rather  never  close  my  eyes  a- 
gain  than  to  run  such  a  risk,  and  that  I  rather  would  spend 
every  breath  I  had  to  draw  in  begging  for  mercy,  and  go 
mourning  all  my  days,  than  to  get  away  in  a  careless  state, 

0  the  thought  of  being  given  up  and  sealed  over  to  ruin, 
was  like  a  mountain  on  my  soul.  From  this  time  I  contin- 
ued, almost  every  breath  I  drew  in  prayer,  excepting  when 

1  was  asleep  :  but  O  how  hard  is  it  to  be  stripped  of  self- 
righteousness  I  I  had  begged,  reformed,  read,  studied,  and 
attained  so  much  head-knowledge,  and  got  such  a  theory 
of  religion,  that  it  was  almost  impossible  for  me  to  be  sU'ip- 
ped  and  become  a  fool. 

One  night  awaking  suddenly  out  of  sleep,  the  thought 
came  into  my  mind,  that  I  might  live  seeking  all  my  days, 
until  I  began  to  think  myself  to  be  a  christian,  and  perhaps 
fall  short  at  last.  O  how  the  thought  distressed  me  !  O 
how  the  thought  of  being  deceived  would  tear  my  soul  and 
body  as  it  were  asunder  :  yea  I  thought  I  would  rather 
spend  all  my  days  in  distress  and  begging  for  micrcy,  if  1 
might  but  be  converted  at  last :  but  llitn  not  to  get  a  hope, 
without  a  living  evidence  of  being  on  the  rock  of  ages,  even 
if  I  was  a  christiaii  :  for  the  matter  appears  to  me  so  im- 
portant, that  I  think  I  could  not  rest  v/ithout  a  living  e\i-  ^ 
dence  of  my  everlasting  welfar'^ 

While  I  was  thus  querying  in  my  mind,  and  ready 
aimost  to  despair  under  a  sense  of  my  danger,  I  thought  T  -f--- 
saw  a  small  body  of  light  as  plain  as  possible  before  mc,  at 
the  same  time,  being  surprised,  and  not  knowing  what  this 
meant,  a  small  still  voice  spoke  through  my  very  soul,  tel- 
ling me,  that  I  need  not  fear  knowing  my  conversion,  if  I 
c^er  was  converted  ;  for  although  I  was  not  certain 
thlit  I  ever  should  be  converted,  yet  if  ever  I  was,  it 
wfculd  be  as  clearly  manifest  to  me,  as  that  light.     Which 


1 


KEY.  KENRY  ALLINK*S 


light,  let  it  be  what  it  would,  I  know  I  saw  it  so  clear- 
ly, as  to  be  indisputable  that  I  saw  it ;  for  God,  who,  I  doubt 
not,  discovered  that  to  me,  could  likewise  discover  his  love 
to  me  as  much  beyond  dispute.  At  the  same  time  I  seem- 
ed in  some  degree  to  be  affected  under  a  sense  of  God's 
condescension,  and  wondered  that  he  should  stoop  so  low  ; 
but  could  not  get  hold  of  any  thing  that  would  support  my 
sinking  sijirit,  nor  remove  my  burden  of  fear  and  distress  ; 
for  1  still  harboured  some  self-dependence,  that  kept  me 
from  bowing  to  the  Redeemer.  O  the  pride  and  stubborn- 
ness of  man's  will  and  nature,  that  will  rather  catch  and 
hang  upon  any  thing,  than  to  give  all  up  to  Jesus  ;  and 
there  is  no  way  for  him  to  be  ledeemed,  but  by  yielding  all 
up,  flinching  from  himself  and  being  willhig  God  should 
be  all  in  all. 

Just  as  a  man,  rack'cl  n^  the  wat'ry  grave, 
Grasps  'veeds  and  straws  his  drowning  life  to  save. 
And  tears  to  leave  what  will  not  grant  relief, 
So  my  poor  soul,  when  trembling  on  the  brink 
Of  endless  death,  expos'd  each  breath  to  sink. 
Yet  hugs  himself  and  harbours  unbelief.  ' 

Although  I  never  yet  had  any  thing  set  home  to  my 
heart,  or  any  thing  that  I  could  get  hold  on  as  a  founda- 
tion, nor  would  allow  myself  to  think  that  I  was  born  again, 
yet  I  Still  retained  a  secret  dependance  on  somethingof  my 
own,  and  would  not  give  up  all  to  the  Saviour :  And  al- 
though my  happiness  was  all  taken  away  and  I  saw  more 
and  more  the  emptiness  of  all  things  here  below,  for  all 
pleasures  ?nd  amusements  failed  me,  yet  I  would  not  go 
hungry  to  Christ  alone.  Yea,  though  all  friends  stood  a- 
loof  from  my  sore,  and  millions  of  worlds  appeared  insuffi- 
cient to  make  me  happy,  and  the  Saviour  standing  at  my 
door  to  imdertake  for  me,  and  be  a  complete  Saviour  and 
my  portion,  yet  O  my  proud  heart  and  stubborn  will  stood 
it  out,  and  would  not  wholly  give  up  to  his  will.  O  the 
contrariety  of  man*s  nature  to  the  nature  of  God.  Thus  \ 
still  remained  nights  and  days,  weeks  and  weeks,  wandgi., 
ing  up  and  down  the  world,  under  the  curse  of  sin  i!^Y\Ci 
death,  without  one  moment  of  peace  or  settled  rest ;  S'-.^, 
ing  nothing  could  make  me  happy  in  this  world  ;  no,  not  \rx 
the  whole  creation,  nor  any  thing  in  Christ  neither,  th  at 
was  worth  aspiring  ai>er  any  further,  than  to  keep  me  froii  -^ 
misery  ,  for  as  yet  I  s,^w  no  beaty  in  Him>  nor  happinesk  ^ 


«    I 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


29 


it  so  clear- 
vho,  I  doubt 
rer  his  love 
me  I  secm- 
sc  of  God's 
)op  so  low  ; 
upport  my 
id  distress  ; 
at  kept  me 
id  stubborn- 
;r  catch  and 
esus  ;  and 
yielding  all 
jod  shouM 


ave. 


>M 


ome  to  my 
a  found  a- 
)orn  again  > 
hiiigoi'my 
And  2iU 
saw  more 
,  for  all 
d  not  go 
stood  a- 
ed  insiifli- 
ing  at  my 
aviour  and 
■will  stood 
O  the 
Thus  ; 
wandg|^„ 
of  sin  rf^i^(\ 
est  ; 


".e.- 


no,  not  \ri 
ther,  th  at 
me  froii  -^ 
lappintsie  ^ 


in  his  ways  :  but  stiU  hoping  that  God  would  convert  me, 
and  bring  me  to  enjoy  something  I  could  not  tell  what,  and 
would  still  plead  v/ith  God  to  undertake  for  me  :  and  al- 
though I  would  not  have  suft'ered  myself  to  expect  salva- 
tion any  way  by  my  own  works  either  in  the  whole  or  in 
part,  yet  all  this  lime  I  was  endeavoring  to  do  a  part,  and 
would  sometimes  think  that  my  prayers  and  fears  would 
prevail  with  God,  and  sometimes  thut  my  being  so  engag- 
ed, so  aftected,  and  so  humble,  would  affect  God,  and  cause 
him  to  pity  me,  and  be  willing  to  convert  me.  And  thus 
it  is  that  children  often  imbibe  such  conceptions  of  God,  by 
hearing  of  vindictive  wrath  and  incensed  justice  in  him; 
tlicrefore,  when  awakened,  will  labour  a  thousand  ways  to 
pacify  or  reconcile  God.  I  think  it  would  be  far  better  to 
teacli  them,  as  it  really  is,  that  God  is  notliing  but  love  and 
goodness,  waiting  for  sinners  to  be  reconciled  to  him  ;  and 
that  all  the  wrath  and  darkness,  anger  and  punishment  A 
that  there  is,  is  in  themselves,  which  would  be  more  likely 
to  convince  them  of  the  necessity  of  a  change  of  nature, 
and  excite  a  more  speedy  escape  to  the  great  Redeemer. 

I  HAD  got  so  much  light  that  I  knew  almost  as  nmch 
as  a  clu'istian  in  my  head,  but  had  nothing  saving  in  my 
heart ;  but  I  had  such  a  doctrinal  knowledge  of  the  neces- 
sity of  conversion,  that  I  thought  it  M'ould  be  the  most 
shocking  judgment  that  could  befal  me,  to  be  left  unmind- 
ful or  careless  of  the  onj  thing  needful  :  yea,  I  retained  u 
fear,  that  T  might  sit  c'ov/n  short  of  Ghrist,  or  forget  my 
exposed  state,  that  I  now  was  in,  and  must  be  in,  until  con- 
verted. There  was  nothing  I  more  feared,  tiian  getting  •, 
back  into  my  former  state  of  security,  so  as  wholly  to  for- 
get m^  lost  and  undone  condition.  About  this  time  I  en- 
deavoured to  find  out  some  way  to  prevent  my  falling  into 
an  insensible  condition,  or  forget  what  I  now  saw  of  my 
miserable  condition  ;  for  which  end  I  concluded  in  my 
mind  to  engrave  upon  some  large  rock,  in  some  private 
place  in  the  woods,  a  few  very  striking  sentences,  that 
would  express  the  distress  I  had  once  been  in,  or  what  I 
had  once  seen,  and  that  1  was  still  in  the  same  lost  and  un- 
done coalition,  and  as  much  exposed  unless  I  was  born  a- 
g^in  :  and  thus  I  should  be  alarmed,  whenever  I  passed 
by  that  rock,  which  might  prove  the  means  of  the  salvation 
of  my  precious  and  immortal  soul.  But  my  distress  in- 
-       C  2  .  .         ■ 


« 


|i! 


30 


REV.   HINRT  ALLINE's 


I 


\  *■: 


1  ; 


creasing  and  for  want  of  some  instrument  and  an  opportu- 
nity I  kept  putting  it  off,  and  so  never  completed  it.  O 
the  inconsistency  oi'  my  conduct  I  for  iiad  I  got  so  away 
and  returned  to  my  former  carnal  state,  as  to  have  no  sense 
of,  or  desire  to  seek  for  salvation,  I  should  have  had  no  de- 
sire to  have  seen  ih-di  rod..  Thus  it  is  tl.ut  man  will  con- 
.  trive  thousands  of  ways  to  bring  some  power  of  his  own 
and  to  carry  on  the  work  of  salvation  himself:  bvit  if  they 
will  not  hear  Moses  and  the  Prophets,  neither  will  they  l.e 
persuaded  though  one  arose  from  the  dead.  My  desire 
for  salvation  was  now  so  great,  that  I  thought  I  would  will- 
ingly do  or  suffer  any  thing,  that  could  be  laid  on  me  which 
would  effect  the  work  :  yea,  had  it  been  possible,  I  vvouW 
have  been  willing  to  have  suffered  the  pangs  of  death  a 
thousand  times,  to  have  purchased  salvation,  or  obtain  re- 
demption and  everlasting  life.  But  O  it  was  all  in  vain  : 
conversion  yet  was  unknown  to  me  ;  yea  at  a  greater  dis- 
tance than  ever. 

One  evening  I  was  at  a  house,  where  there  were  some 
people,  who  made  a  game  of  what  they  had  seen  of  the 
New-Lights  in  New-England,  where  some  of  them  had  been 
and  had  seen  them  ;  and  in  derision  cried  out,  they  were 
converted,  they  were  converted,  and  a  young  woman  fell 
down  on  the  floor  and  frothed  out  of  her  mouth,  and  cried, 
&c.  which  I  knew  she  did  by  way  of  mockery  :  neither  did 
I  believe  to  be  true,  what  they  said  of  the  indecencies  they 
committed  ;  although  I  doubted  not,  but  that  through  an 
extreme  distress  of  mind  they  might  do  some  things  that 
seemed  rather  indecent  to  the  world  :  but  I  still  believed, 
though  I  had  never  seen  any  such  work,  that  it  was  the 
work  of  God  :  it  grieved  me  therefore  to  hear  them  mak- 
ing such  a  game  of  it ;  yet  1  had  not  the  power  to  speak  in 
behalf  of  it,  and  thought  if  I  did  it,  they  would  laugh  at 
nie  ;  and  so,  though  I  did  not  join  with  them  I  held  my 
tongue,  which  I  ought  not  to  have  done.  1  now  believe, 
tb^-t  had  I  come  out  and  spoke,  God  would  have  given  mc 
strength,  and  it  might  have  been  a  blessing  to  my  soul. 
One  of  the  young  women  in  the  company  said  in  these 
words  (by  way  of  laughter)  Lord  have  mercy;  I  wish  I 
■was  there  to  see  how  the  creatures  act :  her  mother  (who 
professed  to  be  a  christian)  replied,  O  Abigail,  I  would  not 
have  you  go  there  for  all  the  world,  for  you  know  that  we 
^''"  not  our  own  keeners,  and  how  do  you  know  you  might 


V. 


LIFS  AND  JOURNAL. 


31 


)pportij- 
I  it.  O 
io  away 
lo  sense 
rl  no  flc- 
AW  fon- 
liis  own 
if  tl^ey 
thcv  Le 
T  desire 
Lild  will- 
e  which 
'.  vvouW 
:leath  a 
tain  rc- 
1  vain  : 
ter  dis- 

I'c  some 

of  tJie 
ad  been 
y  were 
nan  fell 
1  cried, 
her  did 
es  they 
ugh  an 
gs  that 
elievedy 
vas  the 

mak- 
peak  in 
igh   ift 

Id  n;y 
)elieve, 
vtn  mc 
y  soul. 
i  these 
wish  I 
r  (who 
nld  not 
hat  we 

might 


^.f 


not  be  taken  so  too.  O  how  this  cut  me  to  the  heart ;  be  taken 
so  too,  said  I  to  myself,  why  I  would  crawl  on  my  hand» 
and  knees,  if  it  were  possible,  all  m/ days,  if  I  might  be 
taken  hold  of,  as  I  think  they  are,  or  feel,  as  I  think  they 
feel  for  all  what  you  may  laugh  at,  and  deride  them  ;  and 
you,  thought  I,  who  profess  to  l)e  a  christian,  to  be  afraid 
that  your  daughter  should  be  there,  for  fear  of  btfing  taken 
hold  of:  but  she  was  not  alone,  for  I  have  seen  in  my 
travels  great  numbers  slnctj,  poor  blind  souls,  that  profess 
to  be  christians,  yea  ministers  and  members  of  churches, 
as  much  afraid  of  the  power  of  religion  as  she  was.  O 
that  God  would  shake  not  only  the  earth  but  the  heaven.^ 
also. 

I  STILL  found  no  relief  for  my  poor  distressed  mind  ; 
my  perishing  soul  was  yet  in  darkness  and  in  the  prison  of 
unbelief.  Sometimes  I  thought  I  depended  on  my  prayers 
and  tears,  and  then  would  begin  to  iabo'.u'  to  strip  myself 
of  them,  and  when  I  thought  I  had  no  dependence  on  them, 
I  would  de{)end  on  my  not  depending  ;  and  then  I  thought 
I  might  expect  mercy,  because  I  liad  cast  all  away.  I 
knew  that  1  must  be  humi)led,  and  therefore  would  labo\ir, 
as  many  poor  benighted  men  do  picach,to  humble  myself, 
to  prepare  the  way  for  Clirist,  and  strive  to  be  holy  and  to 
hate  sin  before  I  got  Christ. 

How  erreat  the  pride  of  all  the  fallen  race  ; 
How  liard  to  bow  to  the  Redeemer's  grace  : 
How  much  to  help  their  guilty  souls  they'll  try, 
Before  they  wholly  on  the  Lord  rely  : 
Reflect  on  God  and  oftentimes  complain, 
While  offer'd  grace  is  off'er'd  still  in  vain. 
Thus  I  continued  until  the  26th  of  March,    1775,  and 
there  being  no  preaching  in  the  town,  that  day  I  spent,  yea 
all  the  day,  in  reading,  praying  and  meditating,  sometimes 
in  the  house,  and  sometimes  walking  in  the  fields,  but  found 
no  relief  from  any  quarter.     As  I  was  about  sunset  wan- 
dering about  in  the  fields  lamenting  my  miserable,  lost  and 
undone  condition,  and  almost  ready  to  sink  under  my  bur- 
den, I  tho\ight  I  was  in  such  a  miserable  case,  as  never  any 
man  was  before  ;  and  did  not  see  any  prospect  of  ever  ob- 
taining any  relief.     O  the  thought  of  continuing  in  such  a 
dark  vault  and  distressing  storm  as  I  was  in,   how  could  I 
bear  it,  or  what  must  I  do  !    O  why  did  God  make  me  to 
be  thus  miserable,  and  leave  me,  (as  I  thouglit  he  had)  to 
perish  in  this  conditionj  being  a  stranger  to  myself,  to  God 


H 


1     li 


ll; 


I' 


t       \ 


i  * 


iK* 


32 


REV,  MEKRY  ALMKE's 


and  to  all  happiness.  1  returned  to  the  house  und^^r  a> 
much  distress  as  1  could  hardly  bear,  and  when  I  got  to  the 
door,  just  as  1  was  stepping  off  the  threshold,  the  follow- 
hig  impressions  came  into  my  mind  like  a  powerful,  but 
small  still  voice.  You  have  been  seeking,  praying,  reform- 
ing, hi!)ouring,  reading,  hearing  and  meditating,  and  what 
have  you  done  by  it  towards  your  salvation  ?  Are  you  any 
nearer  to  conversion  now  than  when  you  first  I)cgfan  ?  Arc 
you  any  more  prepared  for  heaven,  or  fitter  to  appear  be- 
fore the  impartial  bar  ol'  God,  than  when  you  first  began  to 
seek  ? 

It  brought  such  conviction  on  me,  and  that  immedi- 
ately to  my  mind,  that  I  was  obliged  to  say,  that  I  did  not 
think  I  was  one  step  nearer  than  at  first,  nor  any  more  i»ap- 
py,  or  prepared  than  years  ago  ;  but  as  nmch  condemned, 
as  much  exposed,  and  as  miserable  as  before.  Then  were 
again  in  an  instant  impressed  on  my  mind  these  words, 
Should  you  live  as  much  longer  as  you  have,  and  seek  as 
much,  pray  as  much,  do  as  much  and  refoim  as  much  ;  as 
you  have  done  nothing  now,  you  will  have  done  nothing 
then,  and  then  what  will  yoi.  be  the  better  ?  IVIy  soul 
cried  out  within  me,  no,  no,  I  shall  never  be  better,  if  I  live 
ten  or  twenty  years  longer.  O  what  shall  I  do,  Avhat  shall 
I  say,  or  where  shall  I  flije  ?  I  am  undone  ;  and  if  there  be 
not  some  way  foimd  out,  that  I  am  a  stranger  to,  and  never 
stepped  one  step  in,  I  am  gone  forever.  'O  mercy,  mercy, 
liOrd  have  mercy  on  me,  or  I  am  undone  to  all  eternity. 
And  now  1  began  to  be  stripped,  and  saw  that  I  had  done 
nothing,  and  never  could  do  any  thing.  I  had  often  thought 
that  this  was  not  right,  and  that  was  not  right ;  I  went 
wrong  this  way  and  that  way  ;  did  not  keep  my  watch  this 
time  or  that  time  ;  which  was  the  reason  that  I  had  not 
been  converted  ;  but  if  I  had  done  so  and  so,  and  had  not 
gone  astray  here  and  there,  I  should  have  found  mercy  be- 
fore now,  and  I  intend  to  keep  a  better  watch,  seek  more 
earnesdy,  and  seek  more  humbly,  love,  Sec .  and  then  I 
shall  find  mercy.  But  O  tliese  hopes  and  the  ways  I  had 
so  of^en  and  so  long  practised  all  failed  mc.  and  I  saw  that 
I  could  neither  exti  icate  mvself  out  of  my  lost,  undone  con- 
dition, nor  recommend  myself  to  God  by  any  thing  I  had 
done,  or  ever  could  do  if  I  were  to  live  a  thousand  years. 
And  i  appeared  further  from  conversion  than  ever  :  for  un- 
der some  agreeable  frames,  when  I  felt  my  passions  mov- 


t  ■' 


LIFE   A»H  JOURNAL. 


33 


und^tr  as 
gfot  to  the 

le  follow - 
e»*iu],  b.n 
I'eforni- 
and  what 

you  any 
an  ?  Arc 
^pear  be- 
^t^tjan  to 

immedi- 
did  not 

lore  hap- 

denincd, 

en  were 
words, 

seek  as 

uch  ;  as 

nothing 

^ly  soul 

if  I  hve 

'it  shall 

iiere  be 

i  never 

ernity. 
^  done 
nought 
f  went 
h  this 
d  not 
d  not 
7  be- 
more 
»en  I 

had 

that 
con- 
had 
;ars. 
'un~ 
iov- 


•• 


4 


iK 

^ 


cd,  I  would  hope,  that  I  was  nearer  conversion  ;  hut  now 
even  all  those  ui^reeahle  frames  were  |jjone,  ami  I  found 
that  I  could  neither  love,  pray,  praise  nor  reptru  ;  but  my 
heart  felt  iiurd,  my  will  stubborn,  my  soul  dry  and  barren, 
starving  for  want  of  one  crumb  of  bread,  al!  njy  wisuou)  and 
human  prudence  seenied  to  be  gone,  and  I  was  as  ignorant 
as  a  beast ;  and  my  original  sin  anil  fountain  of  corruption 
appeared  ten  thousand  times  greater  and  worse  than  all  my 
actual  sins.  I  cried  out  within  myself,  O  Lord  God,  I  am 
last,  and  if  thou  O  Lord  dost  not  find  out  some  new  way,  I 
know  nothing  of,  I  shall  never  be  saved,  for  t!ie  ways  and 
methods  I  have  pre«icribed  to  myself  have  all  failed  me,  and 
1  am  willing  they  should  fail.  O  Lord,  have  mercy,  O 
Lord,  have  mercy. 

These  discoveries  continued  until  I  went  into  the 
house  and  sat  down,  which  was  but  a  short  time,  though  I 
saw  more  than  I  could  express  or  had  seen  for  some  time. 
After  I  sat  down,  being  all  in  confusion,  like  a  drov/ning 
man,  that  was  just  giving  up  to  sink,  I  had  nothing  now 
to  depend  on,  but  on  some  invisible  and  unknown  God, 
to  whom  I  was  continually  groaning  with  groans  unuttera- 
ble. I  have  nothing  now  to  support  me,  or  help  me,  what 
must  I  do  ?  or  where  shall  I  go  ?  Will  God  have  mercy 
on  me,  or  must  I  sink  forever  ?  Being  almost  in  an  ago- 
ny, I  turned  very  suddenly  round  in  my  chair,  and  seeing 
part  of  an  old  bible  laying  in  one  of  the  chairs,  I  caught 
hold  of  it  in  great  haste  ;  and  opening  it  without  any  pre- 
meditation, cast  my  eyes  on  the  38th  Psalm,  which  was 
the  first  time  1  ever  saw  the  word  of  God  :  it  took  hold  of 
me  with  such  power,  that  it  seemed  to  go  through  my 
whole  soul,  and  read  therein  every  tiiought  of  my  hearty 
and  raised  my  whole  soul  ^vith  groans  and  earnest  cries  to 
God,  so  that  it  seemed  as  if  God  was  praying  in,  with,  and 
for  me.  This  so  affected  me,  that  I  could  not  refrain  from 
tears,  and  was  obliged  to  close  the  book,  but  still  continued 
praying  in  the  same  words  ;  for  it  seemed,  as  if  I  could  re- 
peat them  almost  as  well  without  the  book  as  with  it.  Af- 
ter I  had  sat  thus  for  some  time,  repeating  over  and  pray- 
ing in  that  Psalm,  I  again  opened  the  bible  without  any 
desij!;n  to  turn  to  any  particular  place  ;  I  cast  my  eyes  on 
the  40t.h  Psalm  ;  the  three  first  verses  being  different  from 
the  rest,  c  me  with  power  and  energy  to  my  heart ;  but 
did  not  still  take  hold  of  it  as  any  evidence  of  my  beii>g 


<i 


4 


34 


hev. 


"KNRY  ALlINE's 


wlial  to  „u,ke  r"  ,      •  I^P'-'^red  new,  and   I  r„„i  i 

vain?    xr!  '"*;'"-foi-e  mv   c-v  ,v.       "^'"'•''t  fnends  could   • 
be  °  ;>  ^  ?"''^  ^''ti^/ittn^  !"■;"■'='  "  ^°'-<'  '<•■<  me  kno  V 


i' 


(Si 


Of     :i,  ""'  ^^"«t  tins  nieht  iffC   ^'^^''  ^  L«^d   Jesus 

-™Wed  and  filf:;,'^;;'!!^,^-  -as  expelled  'mT 
choice  after  the  infinite  Cnflf  ""''  "^^  »'*"  turned  of 
'S-.S.J  and  been  clesmi  ^'f.  [^aU  V'^   '"^''  «" 

■njieaven,  but  with  what  T  „?        •  '°  """y  ^ler  death   o. 

Who,   ,  ,^^.,,^^^  fii  d  witirrr-''  i"  ™-^  ^°"'  -fo  -y 


/ 


-?-ivi2i^TXn  ■ 


LIFE  AND    JOl'RNAI  . 


v>5 


lis 


;d 


x- 


/ 


«hstrtssing  fears,  and  crying;  to  an  unknown  .Clod  for  help, 
uas  now  filled  with  immortal  love,  soaiin^^  on  the  winf^s  of 
faith,  freed  from  the  chains  of  death  and  daikness,  and  cry- 
\u\^  out  my  Lord  and  my  Cod  ;  thou  ait  my  rock  and  my 
fortress,  my  shield  and  my  high  tower,  my  life,  my  joy,  my 
present  and  my  everlasting  portion.  ^ 

O  THE  astonishing  wonders  of  his  grace,  and  tiic 
boundless  ocean  of  redeeming  love  !  millioi^s  and  niillions 
of  praises  belongs  to  his  name.  O  how  shall  I  make  the 
least  return  I  O  what  a  wretch  have  1  been  to  stand  it  out 
against  such  love.  I  have  long  and  often  wondered,  that 
God  did  not  have  mercy  on  me  and  conveit  me  ;  but  r.ow  I 
saw  it  was  my  own  fault,  and  wondered  why  he  waited  so 
long  upon  such  miserable  rejectors  of  his  grace.  O  how 
black  appeared  all  my  righteousness,  which  T  saw  I  had 
hugged  so  long.  And  O  the  unspeakable  wisdom  and 
beauty  of  the  glorious  plan  of  life  and  salvation.  I  have 
often  wanted  some  things  in  the  world,  and  some  plans  to 
be  altered,  and  wished  this  thing  and  that  thing  was  not  so, 
because  it  seemed  hard,  and  not  agreeable  to  my  carnal 
mind  and  human  reasonings  ;  but  I  would  not  now  have  any 
alteration  for  ten  thousand  worlds.  I'.very  thing  that  God 
did  was  right  and  nothing  wanting  :  I  did  not  want  then 
that  God  should  alter  any  thing  for  me>  but  I  was  willing, 
yea  chose  (for  it  was  the  food  and  joy  of  my  soul)  to  bow  to 
him,  to  be  ruled  by  him,  to  submit  to  him  and  to  depend 
wholly  upon  him  both  for  time  and  eternity  ;  and  it  was  the 
joy  of  my  soul  that  he  would  be  God  alone  forever.  I 
wondered  that  ever  an  infinite  God  should  turn  a  thought 
of  mercy  toward  the  fallen  world,  and  be  employed  for  the 
welfare  of  such  a  wretch  as  I  saw  I  was.  But  O  free 
grace,  free  grace  1  O  how  infinitely  condescending  vras  the 
Ancient  of  Days  to  become  an  infant  of  a  span  long  to  re- 
deem perishing  and  immortal  souls  t  He  deserves  their 
praises  for  erer  ;  and  my  soul  longs  to  praise  him,  for  he  is 
my  prophet,  my  priest  and  my  king  :  and  this  is  my  be- 
loved, and  this  is  my  friend,  O  daughters  of  Jerusalem.  O 
the  infinite  condescension  of  God  to  a  worm  of  the  dust  I  for 
though  mywiiole  soul  was  filled  with  love,  and  ravished  with 
a  divine  ecstacy  be)T)nd  any  doubts  or  fears,  or  thoughts  off 
being  then  deceived,  for  I  enjoyed  a  heaven  on  eartli,  and 
it  seemed  as  if  I  were  wrapped  up  in  God,  and  that  he  had 
done  ten  thousand  times  more  for  me  than  ever  I  could  ex- 


'>^ 


36 


RF.V,  l!F,NRV   AI.LINF,  5 


V  ' 


pcct,  or  had  t^cr  thought  of:  yet  he  still  stcopccl  to  the 
wtcikncss  of  my  desiiTs  ami  rcciucsts,  nuulc  as  before  ol  - 
served  on  the  13tli  of  Tebniary  ;  thouf;h  I  had  no  thoughts 
of  it  then,  until  it  was  given  me.  Lookinj^  up,  I  thought  I 
*aw  that  same  light,  though  it  appeared  different,  and  as 
soon  as  I  saw  it,  the  design  was  opened  to  nie,  according  to 
his  promise,  and  I  was  obliged  to  cry  out :  enough,  enough, 

0  blessed  (iod  ;  the  work  of  conversion,  the  change  and 
the  manifestations  of  it  are  no  more  disjKitablc,  than  that 
light  which  I  see,  or  any  thing  that  ever  1  saw.  1  will  not 
say  I  saw  either  of  those  lights  with  my  bodily  eyes,  though 

1  thought  then  I  did,  but  that  is  no  odds  to  me,  for  it  was 
as  evident  to  me,  as  any  thing  I  ever  saw  with  my  bodily 
eyes  ;  and  answered  the  end  it  was  sent  for.  O  how  the 
condescension  melted  me,  and  thought  1  could  hardly  bear, 
that  God  should  stoop  so  low  to  such  an  unworthy  wretch, 
crying  out  still,  enough,  enough,  O  my  (.iod,  I  believe,  1  be- 
lieve ;  at  the  same  time  1  was  ravished  with  his  love,  and  say- 
ing, go  on,  go  on  blessed  God  in  love  and  mercy  to  me,  and 
although  I  do  notdeserve  thee, yet  I  cannot  live  without  thee, 
and  I  long  to  drink  deeper  and  deeper  in  thy  love.  O  what 
secret  pleasure  I  enjoyed  !  happiness  and  food  that  the 
world  knows  nothing  of :  substantial  food  and  settled  joy. 
O  I  would  rather  be  a  door-keeper  in  the  house  of  my 
God  than  to  dwell  in  the  tents  of  wickedness,  crowned  with 
all  the  dignities  of  this  lower  world,  surrounded  with  all 
the  enjoyments  of  time,  and  the  most  exalted  pleasures  of 
sense. 

In  the  midst  of  all  my  joys,  in  less  than  half  an  hour 
after  my  soul  was  set  at  liberty,  the  Lord  discovered  to  me 
my  labour  in  the  ministry  and  call  to  preach  the  gospel.  I 
cried  out  amen.  Lord  I'll  go,  I'll  go,  send  me,  send  me. 
And  although  many  (to  support  the  ministry  of  r.ntichrist) 
will  pretend,  there  is  no  such  thing,  as  a  man's  knowing  in 
these  days  he  is  called  to  preach  any  other  way,  than  his 
going  to  the  seats  of  learning  to  be  prepjired  for  the  minis- 
try, and  then  authorized  by  men  :  yet  blessed  be  God,  there 
is  a  knowledge  of  these  things,  which  an  unconverted  man 
knows  nothing  of.  For  my  own  part  it  was  so  clear  to  me, 
that  I  had  not  the  least  doubt,  but  I  shoidd  preach  the  gos- 
pel ;  although  to  all  appearance  in  the  sight  of  man,  there 
was  none  appeared  more  unlikely  t  for  my  capacity  in 
the  ^  'orld  was  low,  being  obliged  to  labour  daily  with  my 


\\\ 


I 


C(l  to  t\\t: 
H'forc  ol  - 
>  thoii^l.ts 
thought  I 
it,  and  as 
cording  to 
1,  enough, 
langc  and 
than  that 

1  \\\\\  not 
cs,  tliough 

for  it  w  as 
my  hodily 
3  how  the 
uxUy  bear, 
hy  wretch, 
ieve,  I  be- 
e,  and  say- 
to  me,  and 
.ho\it  thee, 
.  O  what 
1  that  the 
ettled  joy. 
ise  of  my 
vvned  with 
with  all 
easures  of 

an  hour 
ed  to  me 
^ospeL  I 
send  me^ 
ntichrist) 
nowing  in 

than  his 
ne  minis- 

od, there 
rted  man 
L^ar  to  me, 
I  the  gos- 
lan,  there 
pacity    in 

with  mv 


$ 


IIFK   AN'D  JOL'RNAl,, 


r.r 


% 


hands  to  get  a  living  ;  my  father's  estate  was  not  very 
large,  and  my  part.nts  being  almost  prst  labour,  I  had  the 
Avholc  care  of  these  temporal  concern.s.  As  for  learning, 
it  was  true  I  had  read  and  studied  more  than  was  common 
for  one  in  my  station,  but  my  education  was  1  ut  small : 
•what  I  had  of  human  literature,  I  had  accpiircd  of  myself 
without  schooling,  excepting  what  I  obtained  before  I  wa^i 
eleven  years  of  age,  for  I  never  went  to  school,  after  I  . 
came  to  Nova-Scotia  ;  so  that  if  learning  only  would  make 
ministers  of  Christ,  as  the  world  vainly  imagine,  I  had  it 
not  :  but,  blessed  be  Cod,  I  trust  I  had  that  to  go  with  mc 
which  was  better  than  all  the  wisdom  and  learning  ;  neith- 
er had  I  the  lea«:t  doubt,  when  1  was  near  to  Cod,  of  being 
not  qualified,  though  after  that,  when  I  got  in  the  dark, 
1  had  :  but  said  with  all  my  soul,  1*11  go,  I'll  go;  send  me, 
send  me  with  the  glad  tidings  of  salvation  and  messages  of 
peace  to  my  fellow-men  :  yea,  my  whole  soul  thirsted  to 
go  ;  and  at  that  time  found  nothing  of  the  fear  of  man  or 
tlie  storms  and  trials  of  a  frowning  world  in  the  way  :  al- 
tliough  before  I  had  any  liborty  for  my  soul  from  the  40th 
Psalm,  those  words,  as  before  obsers'ed,  were  spoken  to  me  : 
'*  Many  shall  see  it,  and  fear,  and  shall  trust  in  the  Lord." 

0  that  ever  Cod  should  make  me  instrumental  in  l>ringing 
one  soul  to  the  knowledge  of  a  Saviour  I  O  Lord,  send  me 
•with  meekness  and  humility.  '^ 

I  spKNT  the  greatest  part  of  the  night  in  ecstacies  of 
joy,  praising  and  adoring  the  Ancient  of  Days,  for  his  free 
ancl  unbounded  <,Tace,  and  rejoicing  ihat  Cod  was  about  to    V 
send  m<'  with  messages  of  peace,  and  the  glad  tidings  of  f  \. 
salvation  to  my  fellow  men ;  and  thought,  if  I  had  a  thousand 
tongues,  I  couJd  employ  them  all  to  spread  the  Redeemer's 
nanje,  and  to  make  manifest  the  wonders  of  his  love  to  the 
children  of  men.     ()  that  they  may  taste  and  see  the  won-   ^ 
ders  of  redeemin  ^  love  !  "* 

After  I  had  been  so  long  in  tliis  irariSport  and  heay- 
cnly  frame,  that  my  nature  seemed  to  require  rest  and 
sleep,  I  thought  to  close  my  eyes  for  a  few  moments  ;  then 
the  devil  stepped  in,  and  told  me,  that  if  I  went  to  sleep,  1 
should  lose  it  all,  and  when  I  should  awake  in  the  morning 

1  would  find  it  all  to  be  nothing  but  a  fancy  and  delusion.  I 
immediately  cried  ^.ut,  O  Lord  Cod,  can  this  be  a  delusion  ?' 
OLoid,  ifl  am  deceived,  undeceive    me.     My  soul  was 


1 


[III 


58 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


Hi'!  > 


iy 


ii  1 


ill 


■i 


1 

} 

.  ' 

■   \ 
i 

1 

1  i 

. 

'  ' 

immediately  carried  again  beyond  all  fear  of  deception  ;  for 
I  could  rest  all  myeoncerns  on  the  Rock  of  Ages, and  found 
myself  in  the  ai-ms  of  redeeming  love.  I  then  closed  my 
eyes  for  a  few  minutes,  and  seemed  to  be  refreshed  with 
sleep ;  and  when  1  awoke,  the  first  inquiry  was.  Where  is 
my  God  ?  and  in  an  instant  of  time,  my  soul  seemed  awake 
in  and  with  God,  and  surrounded  by  the  arms  of  everlasting 
love. 

About  sun-rise  I  arose  with  joy,  to  relate  to  my  par- 
ents what  God  had  done  for  my  soul.  When  I  came  from 
my  rpom,  my  parents  were  just  arising.  I  immediately 
broke  out,  and  declared  to  them  the  miracle  of  God*s  un- 
bounded grace  to  me,  which  so  affected  them  with  joy, 
that  it  almost  overcame  them,  and  what  made  it  more  as- 
tonishing to  them,  was,  because  I  had  never  made  known 
to  them  the  distress  I  was  in  for  weeks  and  months  and 
years  ;  though  they  after  this  told  me,  they  had  often  seen 
me  tremble,  when  discoursing  about  religion  ;  and  that 
though  I  did  not  discourse  about  my  own  standing,  yet  that 
my  expressions  and  conduct  cHen  manifested,  that  I  had 
en  inward  storm.  W^hen  we  had  for  some  time  discoursed 
on  what  I  had  passed  through,  1  took  a  bible  to  shew  theni 
the  words,  that  were  impressed  by  God  on  my  soul  the 
evening  before  ;  but  when  I  came  to  open  the  bible,  it  ap- 
peared all  new  to  me,  and  I  could  not  help  mentioning  ma- 
ny glorious  promises  I  saw,  and  asked  them  many  ques- 
tions about  them,  as  if  they  had  never  seen  them  before  : 
for  it  seemed  to  me,  they  never  had  ;  or  else,  I  thought, 
they  would  have  told  rne  of  them  ;  for  how  could  they  pass 
so  carelessly  by  such  expressions  of  love  and  condescension  of 
an  infinite  God,  as  they  now  appeared  to  nie.  I  then  went 
to  prayer  in  the  family>  returned  public  thanks  to  God  for 
his  infinite  goodness  to  me,  an  unworthy  worm  of  the  dust, 
1  believe,  as  I  have  thought  since,  that  it  must  have  been 
surprising  to  them,  to  have  seen  me  thus  bold  to  pray  in 
public,  when  I  had  never  been  heard  to  speak  even  one 
word  of  my  own  standing,  nor  ever  known  to  pray  either 
in  public  or  in  ^jrivate.  O  what  happy  hours  wc  now  had 
conversing  about  the  Redeemer's  Kingdom  !  I  did  not  tell 
them  any  thing  about  my  being  called  to  preach,  keeping 
that  in  my  own  mind ;  although  I  huve  since  thought,  it 
was  the  w  ork  of  the  devil,  to  keep  it  concealed,  for  it  kept 
me  back  from  public  improvement,  loiiger  than  perhaps 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


39 


ception  ;  for 

'S,  and  found 
closed  my 
'eshed  with 
s,  Where  is 
imed  awake 
everlasting 

to  my  par- 
came  from 
Immediately 
Cod*s  un- 

with  joy, 
t  more  as- 
ide known 
onths  and 
often  seen 
;  and  that 
'g»  yet  that 
liJit  I  had 
■iiscoursed 
hew  them 

poul  the 
•le,.  it  ap~ 
>ning  ma- 
ny  ques- 

before  : 
thought, 
hey  pass 
ension  of 
len  went 
God  for 
■ht  dust, 
ve  been 
pray  in 
ven  one 
f  either 
low  had 
not  tell 
keeping 
Jght,  it 
it  kept 
)erhaps 


^il;.; 

* 


otherwise  I  might  have  done,  and  caused  me  to  pass  many 
a  sorrowful  hour,  not  knowing  what  to  do  ;  1  having  no 
one  to  tell  my  mind  to,  or  ask  advice  from,  who  perhaps 
mi^lit  have  been  instrumental  in  (iod's  hand  )f  helping  m» 
out,  and  shewing  me  the  way  of  duty.  ()  how  1  now  de- 
sired to  be  for  God  and  for  him  only,  and  to  live  lo  his  glory 
and  the  good  of  souls. 

O  let  my  days  and  all  my  hours  be  thine, 
And  lead  my  hungry  soul  to  truths  divine  : 
Set  me  from  ev'ry  eartlily  lover  h*ee, 
And  let  me  spend  my  mortal  days  with  thee  ; 
To  bring  poor  sinners  round  thy  g-lorioui  throne 
And  give  the  praise,  O  God,  to  thee  alone. 
()  let  me  never  leave  my  Saviour  more  "^ 

Till  I  shall  reach  that  blest  immortal  shore,  C 
Bound  up  in  thee,  thy  goodness  to  adore,      j 

March,  1775.  Some  account  of  my  travels  and  the 
dealings  of  God  with  me  from  the  26Ui  of  said  March  to 
May,  the  year  following. 

Little  did  I  think  now  that  I  should  ever  have  any 
doubts  about  my  own  state  ;  for,  I  thought  I  should  have 
nothing  to  do,  but  rejoice  and  walk  in  the  light  of  God's 
countenance.  I  must  acknowledge,  that  1  lived  a  consider- 
able time  without  any  distressing  doubts.  I  used  now  to 
walk  out  in  private  for  hours  and  hours,  and  conversed  with 
God  oftentimes  as  with  an  intimate  friend,  and  feasted  on 
his  love.  The  vanity,  the  pleasures,  the  grandeur,  the  es- 
teem and  the  riches  of  the  world  appeared  but  empty 
sounds  and  shadows  to  me,  and  my  soul  rejoiced  in  riches 
and  pleasures  unknown  to  the  world.  O  the  happy  days 
and  nights  I  often  enjoyed.  1  was  enabled  to  forsake  all 
my  vain  companions  and  pleasures,  and  was  determmt;d  to 
bid  them  an  everlasting  adieu  :  and  although  I  had  b<.:fore 
for  nights  and  nights  rolled  and  turned  on  my  bed  for  fear 
of  death,  judgment  and  eternity,  but  now  my  heart  v/ouM 
oftentimes  leap  for  joy  at  the  prospect  of  death  ;  for  I 
doubted  not  but  I  should  go  to  my  Father's  House,  and  re- 
joice in  bis  love  forever.  Oftentimes  when  walking  out  in 
the  evening  I  would  look  up  in  the  air,  and  think  how  my 
soul  would  rejoice  to  see  the  Judge  of  all  the  earth  appear, 
who  I  doubted  not  but  was  my  everlasting  friend. 

The  great  trials  that  1  now  passed  through,  and  bur- 
dens that  I  laboured  under,  was  respecting  my  cull  to  the 
ministry ;  the  prospect  of  which,and  how  1  should  ever  come 


49 


RE.V.    HENRY    ALLINE^S 


)ll', 


•r 


m 


I    'i 


ill  ii; 

hi 
iii  111 


!■  i 
si   i 


oMt,  would  enj^ross  almost  all  my  serious  medita- 
tions ;  for  I  "u  us  convinced  that  1  must  preach,  but  knew 
not  how,  where  or  when.  I  was  often  afraid  to  come  out, 
»nd  often  ]ono;ed  to  come  out :  yea,  wJierever  I  went  or 
whatever  1  did,  1  thought  of  little  or  nothing  else  :  1  would 
go  to  the  Lord  Vv  ith  it  in  all  my  prayers,  pleading  with  him 
to  shew  me  which  way  to  begin. 

It  was  now  published  abroad  that  Henry  AUine  was 
turned  a  New-Light ;  for  I  talked  much  with  young  peo- 
ple about  their  evil  ways,  and  what  a  wretch  I  had  been  in 
going  with  them  in  the  way  that  led  to  death.  Being  one 
day  at  work  with  a  young  man,  that  had  married  my  sister, 
lie  asked  me,  whether  a  man  might  not  be  born  again,  and 
not  know  it  ?  I  answered  very  positively  ;  No,  by  no  means, 
for  although,  said  I,  they  may  not  know  the  very  day  or 
hour,  yet  the  change  is  so  great,  that  they  will  soon  know 
it.  This  struck  him  with  a  great  sense  of  his  danger,  as 
he  had  a  hope  before,  though  I  did  not  know  it  then  ;  and 
it  never  left  him,  until  he  came  out  rejoicing  in  redeeming 
love  ;  which  was  but  about  one  day  after.  Thus  the  glo- 
rious work  of  God  began  to  spread  in  that  dark  land.  It 
was  astonishing  to  sec  how  the  conduct  and  behaviour  of 
the  young  people  was  changed';  frolicking  ceased,  and  ma- 
ny began  to  be  something  thoughtful.  I  had  been  a  leader 
of  almost  all  the  frolicks  in  the  place,  and  therefore,  al- 
though some  of  the  youth  were  not  awakened,  yet  they 
seemed  to  be  deprived  of  opportunities  to  carry  them  on  ; 
and  some  became  much  engaged  for  the  knowledge  of  a 
Saviour.  O  the  reasonthati  shouldhave  toblessGodallmy 
days,  if  I  could  labour  in  the  Redeemer's  cause  :  yea,  I 
tiiink  if  God  would  give  me  my  rec|uest,  I  would  rather  go 
in  his  name  to  my  fellow  men  with  the  messages  of  peace, 
rhan  to  be  a  ruUr  of  the  whole  world  :  and  sometimes  I  so 
longed  to  be  useful  in  the  cause  of  Christ,  in  preachihg  the 
gospel,  that  it  seemed  as  if  I  could  not  rest  any  longer,  but 
go  I  must  and  tell  the  wonders  of  redeeming  love.  I  lost 
all  taste  for  carnal  pleasures,  and  carnal  company,  and  was 
enabled  to  forsake  them.  I  still  remained  under  a  great 
weight  respecting  my  call  to  the  gospel  mhiistry  ;  not 
knowing  what  to  do,  what  t©  say,  or  where  to  go.  Some- 
times, wh^n  I  got  something  cold,  T  would  think,  that  it 
was  all  in  vain  for  me  ever  to  try  ;  for  it  was  impossible  for 
me  to  come  out,  and  attempt  to  speak  in  public :  but  when 


*s    niedita- 

^I't  knew 

come  out, 

>vent  or 

^  would 
^vith  Jiim 

nine  was 
"iig-  pC'O- 
d  been  in 
'^^ing  one 

'iiy  sister, 

l&'iin,  and 
o  means, 
day   or 

on  know 

"ger,  as 

t'»  ;  and 

t^ieeming- 

tile  gJcL 

and.     It 

viour  of 

and  ma-     • 

a  leader 

'oi'e,  aJ- 

et  they 

ni  on  J 

fe  of  a 

«dJ  my 

yea,  i 

ler  go 

peace, 

s  I  so 

igthe 

r,  but 

f  lost 

I  was 

?reat 

;  not 

)me- 

it  it 

?for 
hen 


LIFE  AND  JOURKAL 


41 


4^ 


I  got  near  to  God,  and  my  soul  filled  with  his  love,  I  saw  I 
must  9;o,  and  1  longed  to  go,  for  it  would  have  been  very 
easy  for  me,  believing  that  God  would  go  with  me  :  but 
still  the  prejudices  of  education  and  the  strong  ties  of  tradi- 
tion so  chained  me  down,  that  I  could  not  think  myself 
qualified  for  it,  without  having  a  great  deal  of  human  leani-^ 
ing ;  and  although  I  sometimes  had   not  the  least  doubt, 
but  God  had  called  me  to  the  ministry,  yet  I  could  not  be- 
lieve, that  it  was  his  will,  that  I  should  preach,  until  he  had 
found  out  some  \\  ay  to  get  me  quaUfied  by   human  assis- 
tance, for  I  thought  I  must  go,  but  could  not  go  without 
learning,  neither  could  I  believe  that  God  expected  that  I 
should  go  without  it.  O  the  strong  chains  of  tradition,  and 
the  great  prejudices  of  education  I    how  many  trials  and 
heavy  hours  might  I  have  escaped,. if  I  could  have  believed 
that  God  would  or  ever,  could  call  any  one  to  the  work  of  * 
the  ministry,  with  no  more  human  learning,  than  v/hat  I 
had  ;  or  could  I  hav».believed  that  I  was  then  called  to  go 
as  I  was.    O,  there  Was  nothing  but  what  I  could  have  gone 
through  or  suffered,  if  I  might  thereby  have  been  qualiilied 
to  go.     Sometimes  I  thought  the  prime  of  my  days  would 
be  over,  before  I  had  found  out  any  way  for  me  to  come  out ; 
and  that  I  could  not  bear.    O,  my  days  were  fleeting  away, 
and  nothing  done.     I  longed  to  be  at  work  before  the  day 
was  over  and  the  night  come  when  no  man  can  v/ork  ;  and 
then,  O  then,  I  must  quit  the  world,  and  never  be  useful  to 
souls.     O  how  impatient  was  I  for  liberty,  that  I  might  be 
employed  in  the  cause  of  Christ ! 

About  April  or  May,  I  made  known  my  mind  to  a 
man  that  married  one  of  my  sisters,  who  had  been  a  chris- 
tian some  years.  It  seemed  to  rejoice  his  heart  to  hear 
that  God  was  calling  me  to  the  work  of  the  ministry  ;  and 
told  me,  that  he  was  convinced  by  what  I  had  told  him  ; 
and  said  he  would  spare  no  pains  for  my  encouragement. 
He  asked  me  what  kept  me  from  coming  out  immediately. 
I  toldhimthe  whole  reason  was,becaasel  had  not  a  sufficient 
degree  of  human  learning.  O  the  prejudices  of  education  and 
strong  ties  of  tradition.  He  was  under  the  chains  as  well 
as  myself  respecting  human  learning,  in  some  degree.  He 
advised  me  to  apply  myself  immediately  to  reading  and 
studying,  until  some  door  opened  to  me  to  attain  to  more 
learning.    I  still  continued  restless  in  my  mind^  not  know- 

D  J 


T' 


m 


W. 


42 


«EV.  HKNfiy  ALLINE's 


•  'eft  lo  stone  S,  ^d  t"  dis'"  '''°"'  P'' '^^"^nt.  '  Th:'r  ^ 
7s  kind,  ^d  ji^,  no  tavrr^'-^Se  '"« ;  butttill  ih^tvl 
of  h,s  love  and  intentio  mo  w/^'Jr'''"'"'  ^  "e^on   4^^ 

P'-each  until  I     ad  .       '°'\^  Persuasion,  Um    '.     ,  f''''"' ' 

•      proceed  to  New^tS'"'^  l"""'"^^'  ""d  4 uefoTe      '"" 

to  get  learning  tl»:rfH'  '"'^ '^"''eavour  some' r.v  n^  "f "' 

means  or  other      ifhL        ,      ^  '^e  provided  for  i       '"^^ 
;v4'sve,y  indulgent  to  ^^e"t?';^°"^^'"'' «^ 'hey  4^^^^ 

S' '°S  "r™' ^- ' -s"gorrtn;v 

ers  in  I       '"'°,"''^  ^^''^  'he  only  on?r  h    f  ^''"^  Cornwal- 
tis  in  law,  and  he  has  been  llhT,-      "'''  excepting  broth 
vve  were  about  to  part,  Uomt^'T''  ^""^  years.  Svhen 

7  gav?  "f  good  advice,  thou  *,?l7r'"^  '  ''^  immediate" 
'■e  advised  me  to  return  ;^^-     '"^  "ot  see  it  thm  .  r 

culled  me  to  preac  ,' 1™  ^^^1'',^  '^"^'"  f"''  if  Ood"  ht[ 
ought  to  come  iiWediat'eVotrihe^t.  --&  step^'fo^^l 

t'  :u.^h  /sralSitt-dsi-r  -    P-^e  tf to^?^ 

-s  not^Zirr  so°  n'^rrf^'ht'f  '°"'"'  *"«  t^e  vessel 
»«•     I  was  impatient  to  be^^ii  li^'f  ^"^.^  ^  great  trial  to 


txi 


% 


i 


4- 


LIFE   AND  JOURNAL. 


ii 


'iew  iliat  I 
out  college 
and  strong 

The  devil 
II  the  Lord 
lonstration 
ith  me  and 
d  all  fear ; 

could  not 
fore  must 
^y  or  other 
ith  of  Oc. 
''  for  me, 
\Sot  but  a 
:oncerned 

hy  some 
Its  that  I 
for  what  ; 

"vvere  al- 
at  desire 
■^ny  relii- 
of young 

he  time 

"gland. 

ay  with 

ornwal- 
^  broth- 
WJien 

lediate- 

-n  ;   for 

od  had 
for  I 

J)   and 
to  it, 
He 
great 

Vessel 

iai  to 

pass- 

with 

■appy 

itely,. 


1 


■& 


as  God  might  have  led  me.  I  remain jd  a  few  days,  and 
heard  that  the  vessel  was  seized,  and  would  ncl  get  clear 
until  the  Spring.  O  the  trial  that  1  was  now  under  ;  the 
devil  setting  in  .it  the  same  time,  tellh-.g-  me,  H-night  i.ow 
be  convinced,  tlv.it  God  had  not  called  mc  to  pi-eacl:,  be- 
cause, ii"  he  had,  he  would  have  found  out  ways  for  me  to 
have  gone,  and  get  learning,  as  he  knew  I  coidd  not  preach 
v/ith<jul  it.  At  tl;e  same  thu^  1  heard  iVom  iwy  rv:lativ;ns, 
that  they  had  all  taken  the  small  pox,  and  tiiey  advised  me 
by  all  means  to  return,  v.  hich  I  finally  diil  (aUhou;.';h  with  a 
heavy  heart,)  and  received  with  them  the  diblemper  by  inoc- 
ulation ;  as  it  was  spreadin:;  through  the  whole  town. 
Neither  w.as  the  takinj^  of  ii  the  tenth  part-?}!'  the  trial  to  my 
mind  as  my  disappointment  was,  1  not  knowing  ^\hat  to  do, 
being  still  under  great  imi^resslons  about  \\\\  call,  v.  hicli  I 
could  not  throw  oif.  \V''e  were  all,  by  the  great  goodr.ess 
of  God,  carried  safe  throueh  the  disteiur-er.  lUv  father's 
family,  and  those  that  were  married  to  my  sisters,  aixl 
their  families,  excepting  one  ialant.  Indeed  thei-e  w,.;s  but 
one  more,  1  think,  in  the  whole  towio,  taat  died  ol'  the 
distemper.  So  uncommonly  blt;ssed  wiis  the  use  cfiiicc- 
ulation^ 

1  STILL  retained  a  continual  dra\\ini2:  to  the  ^\ork  of 
the  ministry,  and  was  impatient  to  pioelaini  the  everlasting 
gospel  :  although  I  sometimes  ["eared,  it  was  only  my  proud 
heart  that  aspired  after  a  public  station  in  the  world,  to  make 
a  great  shew,  and  court  the  applause  of  men  :  but  had  I 
known  how  much  it  would  have  turned  to  the  reverse,  1 
might  have  had  a  weapon  against  the  enemy  ;  for  altliougii 
those  that  go  without  the  power  of  the  gospel  under  a  form 
of  religion,  may  have  but  few  trials,  and  but  little  opposi- 
tion ;  yet  whoever  goes  in  the  name  of  Jesus  with  the  ])ow- 
er  of  the  gospel  must  never  expect  the  applause  of  the 
world,  but  on  the  contrary  many  irowns  ;  but  when  1  vvas 
brought  near  to  God,  and  enjoyed  his  presence,  I  could  say 
with  all  my  heart  (as  I  often  told  the  Lord)  that  1  would 
rather  be  called  immediately  out  of  time  into  eternity,  than 
to  be  left  to  go  in  the  name  of  God  without  his  call,  and 
without  his  spirit  to  lead  and  bless  me,  (it  was  now  about 
Novsmoer)  and  thouj^h  i  had  been  greatly  attached  to  the 
world,  courting  its  esteem  and  enjoyments;  yet  I  think  I 
cotdd  say  with  all  my  soul,  that  I  rather  would  go  with  a 
dispensation  of  the  gospel  to  my  fellow-inen  (although  the 


,1 


i 


I  'I 


kVi 


44 


REr.  HENRT  ALLINE*S 


trials  may  be  ever  so  threat)  if  God  would  go  with  mc,  tharr 
to  be  the  bole  monarch  of  the  universe. 

Ad  OUT  tliis  time  I  was  solicited  by  some  of  the  officers 
».  to  put  in  for  a  commission  in  the  mihtia  ;  I  utterly  re- 
fused to  take  c'K  step  in  pursuit  of  it  ;  yet  after  this,  when 
I  g-ot  a  little  in  the  dark,  I  be^an  to  wisli  that  I  had  taken 
it ;  for  that  grandem*  aiul  the  esteem  of  the  world,  which 
tlie  devil  and  my  own  corrupt  nature  sug-^ested,  I  might 
oi}tain  by  success  in  a  few  years,  began  to  look  pleasant  to 
me,  like  Kve*s  apples,  pleasant  to  the  eyes,  and  a  fruit  to  be 
desired  :  but  while  I  was  meditating  on  this,  the  Lord  broke 
iiito  my  soul  with  the  revivals  of  his  grace,  the  sweetness 
of  his  love  ;  and  shewed  me  the  vanity  of  all  things  here  be- 
low, and  tiie  worth  of  souls,  v/hich  gave  me  such  a  longing 
desire  to  go  forth  with  the  gospel,  and  proclaim  the  Re- 
deemer's name,  that  my  soul  cried  out.  Send  me,  send  me, 

0  Lord  God, in  tliy  blessed  name,  and  take  away  all  honour, 
but  the  glory  of  the  cross,  and  all  commissions  but  a  com- 
mission from  heaven  to  go  forth,  and  enlist  my  fellow-mor- 
tals to  fight  under  the  banners  of  King  Jesus  :  and  my  soul 
rejoices  to  take  it  for  my  whole  portion,  while  on  this  mor- 
tal stage.  Sometimes  I  feared  that  I  was  only  imposed  upon 
by  the  devil  and  my  proud  heart,  and  tried  myself,  whether 

1  did  not  covet  to  have  a  great  name  in  the  world,  and  to  be- 
come popular. 

One  day,  being  under  great  trials  of  mind,  one  of  my 
.  brothers  in  law  spoke  to  me,  and  asked  me  if  I  was  fully 
satisfied,  that  I  w  as  called  to  preach  the  gospel  ?  I  told  him 
yes.     He  asked  me  then,  what  I  was  waiting  for  ?  If  God 
had  called  me,  I  ought  immediately  to  go,  and  not  wait  for 
any  more  learning  ;  God  was  able  to  give  me  all  the  assis- 
tance that  I  needed.     I  answered,  that  although  I  was  con- 
vinced that  God  had  called  me,  vet  I  could  aot  think  that  it 
was  his  will  for  me  to  proceed,  until  that  he  had  given  me 
more  human  wisdom.     Why,  said  he,  has  not  Christ  learn- 
ing enough  ?  Is  he  not  able  to  teach  you  in  half  an  hour  in 
his  school,  more  than  you'll  be  able  to  obtain  in  the  seats  of 
human  learning  all  your  life.     This  I  told  him,  was  very 
true  ;  yet  I  thought  I  needed  more  of  man's  wisdom  and 
learning  than  what  I  had.     He  told  me  that  my  success  in 
the  gospel  did  not  consist  in  knowing  so  much  myself,  as 
in  the  spirit  of  God's  going  with  me,  whiqh  certainly  would 
go  with  me,  if  God  had  called  me.     I  told  him  if  the  Lord 


tl3 


\ 


i.IFE  AND  JOURNAL 


41. 


T7T 
* 


designed  that  1  should  preach  with  no  more  Icarnin^^  than 
I  had,  he  would  certainly  have  made  it  manifest  some  way 
or  other,  lie  answered,  lie  thought  it  was  already  evident- 
ly manifest,  when  a  small  number  oi  people  did  meet  in  tlie 
town  every  sabbath  day,  and  I  wiih  them,  and  no  minister, 
nor  any  one  to  ^ive  a  word  of  exhortation  ;  and  1  believe  it 
would  be  very  acceptable  to  the  christians  of  that  society,  if 
you  was  to  improve.  Tliia  bore  much  on  my  mind,  and  led 
me  to  examine  more  closely,  whether  the  Lord  had  really 
called  me  ;  and  what  he  would  call  me  for,  if  he  did  not  in- 
tend that  I  should  i)reach*:  but  still  I  thoui^ht  he  was  con- 
fined to  human  learnini^,  and  that  he  would  not  send  me 
without  it ;  but  would  find  out  some  way  to  give  it  to  me. 

0  the  prejudices  of  education  I  I  had  heard  so  nmch  of 
ministers  coming  through  the,  orders  of  men,  that  it  seemed 
to  be  an  infallible  rule.  But,  blessed  be  the  Lord,  he  still 
followed  me  with  divine  impressions  on  my  mind  to  that 
degree,  that  I  could  hardly  engage  in  any  worldly  employ- 
ment ;  for  it  seemed  as  if  it  was  not  my  work,  and  that  I 
was  out  of  my  duty  all  this  time.  O  what  a  privilege  it  ap- 
peared to  me,  and  what  a  happy  prospect,  when  I  thought 

1  should  one  day  speak  in  the  name  of  the  Lord  God.  The 
gospel  appeared  glorious,  and  my  soul  longed  to  be  engag- 
ed in  proclaiming  the  wonders  of  redeeming  love.  O,  I 
could  say  many  days  and  wctks,  that  I  would  have  chosen 
it  for  my  portion  as  long  as  life  should  remain,  and  prefer  it 
above  any  blessing  or  enjoyment  that  God  could  give  me. 
Yea,  sometimes  my  heart  would  leap  for  joy,  when  I 
thought  of  going  in  the  name  of  the  Lord,  and  would  not 
regard  any  trials  in  the  way,  if  God  would  only  go  with  me, 
and  give  me  strength  equal  to  my  day.  Sometimes  I  did 
not  doubt,  but  I  should  soon  see  the  the  happy  moment, 
that  God  would  find  out  some  way  for  me  to  go  forth  ; 
and  O  when  I  got  near  to  God,  it  would  be  the  first  re- 
quest I  had  to  make,  that  God  would  take  me  in  his  hand, 
and  use  me  in  his  vineyard  until  my  dyinjjj  day. 

About  the  1 3th  or  14th  day  of  April,  1776,  I  began 
to  see  that  I  had  all  this  time  been  led  astray  by  labouring 
so  much  after  human  learning  and  wisdom,  and  had  held 
back  from  the  call  of  God.  One  day  in  my  meditation  1 
had  such  a  discovery  of  Christ's  having  every  thing  1 
needed,  and  that  it  was  all  miiie,  that  I  saw  I  needed  no- 
thing to  qualify  me  but  Christ  J  and  that  if  I  had  all  the 


46 


REV.  MKNRY  ALLINE*a 


Hi  in 


I 


^n 


:U 


ivisdom  that  could  ever  be  obtained  liy  mortals,  without  hav- 
ini^  the  spirit  of  Christ  with  me,  I  should  never  have  any 
success  in  preaching  ;  and  if  Christ  went  with  me  I  should 
have  all  in  all.  And  ()  what  a  wilUngness  I  fell  in  my  soul 
to  go  in  his  name  and  strength,  depending  on  him  alone.  I 
found  I  had  notliing  more  to  inquire  into,  but  whether  God 
had  called  me  :  for  he  knew  what  learning  I  had,  and  could 
have  in  the  course  of  liis  providence  brought  me  through 
all  the  seats  of  learning,  that  ever  man  went  through,  to- 
gether M'ith  all  the  orders  of  men  ;  but  he  had  not ;  there- 
fore I  had  nothing  else  to  observe,  but  the  call  of  God  :  and 
when  I  got  near  to  him  and  enjoyed  a  sense  of  divine  things, 
I  was  fully  convinced  (though  in  the  dark  I  would  often 
doubt)  and  was  now  determined  to  come  forward  the  first 
opportunity  I  could  get.  The  18th  April,  being  a  day  set 
apart  for  fasting  and  prayer,  I  came  out  and  spoke  by  way 
of  exhortation,  had  some  liberty,  but  was  under  great  tri- 
als the  night  following,  when  I  was  watching  with  a  young 
man,  that  appeared  to  be  near  his  end.  The  devil  was  all 
night  against  me,  telling  me  that  I  had  gone  astray,  and 
had  no  business  to  speak,  and  that  I  had  wounded  the  cause 
of  Christ  in  so  doing  :  and  so  powerful  and  great  was  the 
temptation,  that  I  was  about  to  make  a  promise,  that  I 
never  would  speak  again  in  public  while  I  lived  ;  for  I  had 
certainly  gone  astray  ;  for  if  I  had  not,  I  should  not  be  un- 
der such  trials.  But  when  I  was  about  to  make  a  vow, 
never  to  speak  again  in  public,  a  thought  came  into  my 
mind,  that  it  was  now  not  a  proper  time,  for  if  I  intended  to 
make  such  a  promise,!  ought  to  take  a  time  when  I  had  no- 
thing to  encumber  my  mind,  and  when  I  should  get  near  to 
God,  with  nothing  to  interrupt  me  :  I  then  put  off  the  vow 
until  morning,  intending  to  seek  a  convenient  opportunity 
for  it.  Accordingly  I  went  early  in  the  morning  in  the 
woods,  and  endeavoured  to  lay  my  case  before  God,  and  the 
Lord  gave  me  a  nearness  to  him  :  and  O  what  a  change  of 
mind  I  found ;  for  I  was  willing  then  to  make  ten  vows 
that  I  would  speak,  and  that  the  first  opportunity,  which 
accordingly  I  did  the  next  sabbath.  I  spoke  a  few  words 
the  Saturday  before  to  my  parents  to  know  their  minds,  and 
although  they  did  not  dissuade  me,  yet  I  saw  it  was  not  a- 
greeable  to  them.  This  was  x  great  trial  to  me  ;  and  the 
devil  made  a  great  use  of  it  for  my  discouragement,  telling 
me,  that  I  held  them  to  be  christians,  and  1  saw  they  were 


I 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


4f 


against  it,  which  was  an  eviclenrt ,  ihat  it  was  not  tlic  will 
of  God.  But  the  Lord  carried  nn,  throiigh  it  all  ;  and  I 
iound  I  must  go  and  speak  before  .  ^rn  ;  a't'^ouj^h  1  saw 
at  the  same  time  that  it  was  disagreeable  to  them,  'i  iiey  dis- 
coursed as  if  they  were  jealous  thati  was  under  a  delusion  ; 
buttwo  or  three  of  my  christian  friends  were  ^::reedin<j!;  solic- 
itous for  me  to  proceed  :  vvliich  by  the  Grace  ot  uod  1  did, 
and  it  immediately  spread  abroad  over  the  whole  place, 
and  caused  manv  to  come  out  of  curiosity  ;  but  the  Lord 
gave  me  boldness  to  speak.  I  spoke  from  the  following 
words:  If  thou  art  wise,  thou  art  wise  for  thyself,  but  if 
thou  scornest,  thou  alone  shaltbear  it.  There  seemed  to  be  a 
great  attention  paid  by  some  ;  although  others  made  a 
scoff,  but  some  seemed  to  be  taken  hold  of,  and  some  chris- 
tians took  me  by  the  hand,  and  bid  me  God  speed  :  but  all 
the  trials  I  met  from  without  were  not  equal  to  those  with- 
in, I  still  continued  improving  every  Sabbath-day,  being 
sometimes  in  the  dark  and  sometimes  in  the  light ;  and 
when  I  was  in  darkness,  and  did  not  find  the  spirit  of  God 
with  me,  when  speaking,  I  would  be  ready  to  sink,  and 
thought  I  would  preach  no  more  ;  and  when  I  got  life  and 
liberty  again,  my  strength  and  my  resolutions  were  renew- 
ed ;  and  thus  God  dealt  with  me,  and  carried  me  through 
various  scenes. 

It  being  reported  at  this  time  that  Henry  Allinc 
was  turned  New- Light  preacher,  many  would  come  from 
other  towns,  even  whole  boat-loads.  Some  came  to  hear 
what  the  babler  had  to  say  ;  some  came  with  gladness  of 
heart  that  God  had  raised  up  one  to  speak  in  his  name ;  and 
some  come  to  make  a  scotf,  but  it  did  not  seem  to  trouble 
me  much  ;  for  I  trust  God  was  with  me  and  supported  and 
enabled  me  to  face  a  frowning  world.  The  greatest  trials 
1  met  with  were  from  my  parents,  who  were  so  much  a- 
gainst  my  improving,  as  sometimes  to  leave  the  house  as  I 
was  speaking.  O  how  it  would  cut  me  sometimes  ;  but, 
blessed  be  God,  he  not  only  carried  me  through  these  tri- 
als ;  but  likewise  so  opened  their  eyes,  that  they  were  as 
much  engaged  for  me  to  preach  the  Gospel,  as  I  was,  and 
would  have  plucked  out  even  their  eyes  for  my  encourage- 
ment. Thus  God  was  kind  to  me  in  every  respect,  and  ev- 
er worked  for  my  good.  He  blessed  my  soul,  supported 
my  body,  blessed  my  labours  in  some  degree,  increased  my 
desires   and  my  resolutions,  lifted  me  above  the  fears  and 


'     I: 


4S 


RF.V,  IIKNP.Y   AT, link's 


trials  ot' the  \V(;i'ld,  wcnied  me  in  a  great  dcj^ree  from  tlit: 
fliitteiin;^  chunus  of  this  worltl  ol"  sense,  and  increased  my 
faith. 

In-  July  I  \vasln\itcdby  one  Joseph  Baii.ey  to  preach 
at  his  housL-  at  Newport.  I  accordini^ly  vent  over,  and  found 
a  great  niiml)er  of  people  attending  :  Cod  gave  me  great 
bokhiess  and  freedom  of  speech  in  declaring  the  ^vonders 
of  redeeming  love  :  and  although  many  came  to  watch  for 
,  my  halting,  yet  they  seemed  to  be  struck  with  awe,  and 
some  of  the  christians  after  meeting  gave  me  the  iiand  of 
fellowship. 

I  coxTiNUKD  preaching  every  Sabbath,  and   wrought 
Mith  my  hands  all    the  week  ;  and  blessed  be  God  for    the 
happy  lioui's  I  enjoyed  in  the  field,  and   in    private  walks. 
()  I  enjoyed  peace,  that  the  world  knows  nothing  of  ;  and 
I  foimd  un  increasing  resolution,  to  be  for  God  and  him  on- 
ly.     I  was  determined   by   ihe  grace  of  God,  that  I  would 
not  have  any  other   portion  in   this  world   but  the  Ciospel, 
which  should    be  my  everlasting  portion  :  and  I  did  really 
believe  that  I  should  be  disentangled    from  all  my  seculai' 
employments,  and  have  work  in  the  Vineyard  of  the  Lord 
and  be  engaged  therein  all  my  life.     O,  the  very  thoughts 
of  going  in  the  name  of  Christ,  and  being   the   means  of 
bringing  a  soul  to  his  love,  woidd    often  make  my  soul  re- 
joice. 

September  27th.  I  rode  with  some  of  my  christian 
friends  to  Newport,  in  order  to  gather  a  visible  church,  to 
walk  in  the  order  of  the  Gospel;  v/Lich  had  been  some 
months  in  agitation.  I  was  chosen  to  draw  the  articles, 
with  the  assistance  of  some  brethren.  Some  articles  were 
drawn,  and  the  next  day  signed  by  some  brethren.  I 
preached  a  sermon,  and  the  Lord  seemed  to  own  us.  The 
tgason  that  we  called  for  no  assistance  from  other  church- 
es was,  because  we  did  not  think  the  churches,  in  those 
parts  were  churches  of  Christ,  but  had  only  a  dry  form 
without  religion.  The  church  was  gathered  both  of  Bap- 
tists and  Co>igregationals  ;  for  we  did  not  think  that  such 
small  non-essentilals,  as  different  opinions  about  water  Bap- 
tism, were  sufficient  to  break  any  fellowship,  and  to  obstruct 
building  together  among  the  true  citizens  of  Zion  :  and  the 
Lord  owned  and  answered  us,  and  blessed  us  by  increasing 
the  gifts,  graces  and  the  numbers  of  the  small,  feeble  band. 
Bcitthc  powers  of  darkness  and  church  of  antiQlirist  rose 


i 


Uri   AND  JOURNAL. 


49 


'1  from  thf 
reused  my 

to  preach 

and  found 

;  m^;  threat 

e  Avonders 

watch  for 

awe,   and 

e   hand  of 

:l  wrought 
od  for   the 
vate  walks, 
it^  of ;  and 
ind  him  on- 
lat  I  would 
he  Gospel, 
I  did  rtally 
my  F.cculav 
)f  the  Lord 
•y  thoughts 
means  of 
ny  soul  re- 

y  christian 
church,  to 
been  some 
tie  articles, 
tides  were 
thren.       I 
1  us.     The 
er  church - 
:,  in  those 
dry  form 
ith  of  13 ap- 
that  such 
,vater  Bap- 
to  obstruct 
n :  and  the 
increasing 
eble  band, 
hrist  rose 


/ 


njjainst   it    from   every  quarter,  both   in   public   and  pri- 
vate. 

We  then  returned  to  Falmouth,  where  I  remained 
preaching  every  Sabbath  imtil  the  27th  of  October,  when  we 
went  over  to  Newport  again,and  set  apart  by  ordination  two 
elders  :  this  was  done  without  any  assistance  from  any  other 
church  ;  and  these  elders  came  forward  to  lead  the  church,^, 
as  far  as  their  gifts  and  graces  extended.  - 

November  3d.  As  I  was  invited  to  Horton,  I  preach- 
ed there  two  sermons  on  the  Sabbath-day,  which  seemed 
to  have  much  effect,  and  gained  the  attention  of  the  people. 
I  was  desired  to  preach  again  in  the  evening,  which  I  did, 
and  the  Lord  was  there.  It  was  a  strange  thing  \o  seq  a 
young  man,  who  had  often  been  there  a  frolickmg-how 
preaching  the  everlasting  gospel.  The  people  seemed  to 
have  hearing  ears,  and  it  left  a  solemn  sense  on  some 
youths.  I  remained  there  till  Tuesday  evening  and  preach- 
ed again  ;  when  there  was  such  a  throng  of  hearers,  that 
the  house  could  not  contain  them  ;  and  some  of  them  were 
that  evening  convicted  with  power.  As  I  was  returning 
home  to  Falmouth,  I  met  a  young  man  who  desired  me  to 
attend  a  funeral.  I  accordingly  went,  and  preached  a  ser- 
mon, and  there  was  a  great  solemnity  on  the  people,  I 
saw  there  a  young  man  from  Cornwallis,  who  desired  mc 
to  come  over  there  as  soon  as  possible  ;  he  would  inform 
the  people  of  it  and  get  a  place  appointed  for  meeting ♦  I 
told  him  I  was  willing  to  go  wherever  God  called  me,  and 
would  oome  there,  if  it  appeared  to  be  my  duty,  as  soon  as 
possible.  I  then  went  home  to  Falmouth,  and  preached  indif- 
ferent places,  and  the  Lord  was  with  me.  We  had  blessed 
days;  for  the  Lord  was  reviving  a  work  of  grace.  Many 
under  a  load  of  sin  cried  out  what  shall  we  do  to  be  saved  ? 
and  the  saints  seemed  much  revived,  came  out  and  witnes- 
sed for  God.  In  a  short  time  some  more  souls  were  bom 
to  Christ,  they  came  out,  and  declared  what  God  had  done 
for  their  souls.  O  what  a  blessed  change  had  taken  place 
in  that  town.  O  may  the  praise  resound  to  the  Redeem- 
er's name. 

November  the  29th,  I  set  out  for  Cornwallis,  rode  as 
far  as  Horton,  and  from  thence  to  Cornwallis.  Being  wea- 
ry and  very  wet  (for  it  had  rained  very  hard  that  day)  I 
stopped  In  the  borders  of  the  town  that  night :  the  next 


'  'I 


10 


REV.   HENRY  ALLINL's 


r 


i     II 


;i- 


^, 


morning  being  still  wet,  I  was  something  discouraged, 
fearing  1  should  lose  the  opportunity  of  preaching  ;  being 
a  stranger  in  the  place,  and  my  horse  being  taken  lame,  1 
was  obliged  to  change  him.  I  then  rode  to  the  further  part 
of  the  town,  where  the  meeting  was  appointed  ;  but  the 
people,  not  expecting  me  to  come  by  reason  o.f  the  weath- 
er, had  not  assembled,  but  when  they  heard  that  I  was 
come,  they  immediately  gathered  a  large  congregation  time 
enough  to  preach  one  sermon  :  the  Lord  was  there,  and 
gave  me  great  freedom  ;  I  was  wholly  undaunted.  In  the 
evening  1  preached  again.  The  next  day  I  rode  about  four 
miles  and  preached  again,  when  the  Lord  began  to  set  the 
word  home  w  ith  power  on  some  of  the  hearers.  Many  peo- 
ple attended,  hcanng  that  there  was  a  wild  youth  lately  con- 
verted and  turned  preacher.  The  standing  minister  of, 
and  then  at  the  place,  came  to  hear,  and  seemed  determin- 

I  ed  to  dash  me  :  but  he  and  all  the  rest  were  to  me  then  as 
worms  of  the  dust  like  myself.  He  had  been  the  minister 
of  the  town,  but  on  account  of  some  division  between  him 
and  his  people  he  was  dismissed  and  did  not  seem  pleased 
with  my  coming  into  the  town.  I  returned  to  Morton, 
where  I  preached  two  sermons  as  I  passed  throi  •  and 
God  was  pleased  to  take  hold  of  the  liearts  of  som^  »yi  the 
hearers,  and  never  left  them, until  they  were  brought  to  the 
knowledge  of  the  Redeemer. 

1777,  January.  O  the  astonishing  goodness  to  me  an 
unworthy  mortal.  I  am  sometimes  astonished,  when  I  consi- 
der what  he  hath  done  for  me  :  but  a  short  time  ago  I  was  in 
this  very  town  frolicking  and  wallowing  in  all  manner  of 
sin  and  vanity  ;  and  am  now  through  the  riches  of  free  un- 
bounded grace,  I  trust  in  the  name  of  Jesus,  proclaiming 
the  wonders  of  redeeming  love.  O  that  God  would  go  on 
m  mercy  to  me,keep  me  humble,and  devote  me  to  his  praise. 
January  15th.  I  went  to  Newport  where  I  remain- 
ed preaching  for  five  days  ;  and  the  people  being  desirous 
to  hear,  an<d  much  scattered,  I  preached  every  day.  O 
that  the  word  might  prove  a  blessing  to  their  precious 
souls.  I  then  returned  to  Falmouth,  and  remained  there 
preaching  and  visiting  the  people  until  the  3d  of  February, . 

r-  vherc  there  still  appeared  something  of  a  work  of  God.  O 
that  it  might  be  continued  for  the  conversion  of  many  souls. 
I  now  thought  it  time  to  return  to  Cornwallis  again.  I  set 
•lit  and  rode    to  Horton,  where    I  preached  as    I   passed 


V-4. 


scouraged, 
ng  ;  being 
en  lame,  1 
irther  part 
,  ;  but   the 
the  weath- 
that  I  was 
jation  time 
there,  and 
id.     In  the 
;  about  four 
to  set  the 
Many  peo- 
i  lately  con- 
ninister  of, 
1  determin- 
me  then  as 
he  minister 
et"Nveen  him 
L-m  pleased 
to    Morton, 
:oi       •  and 
Dm-  ^i   the 
night  lo  the 

iS  to  me  an 
:henlconsi- 
golwas  in 
manner  of 
of  free  un- 
>roclaiming 
|ould  go  on 
his  praise. 
I  remain - 
Ig  desirous 
|y  day.     O 
precious 
lined  there 
February, . 
lofGod.  O 
lany  souls, 
tain.     I  set 
I   passed 


! 


LIFE  AND    JOURNAL. 


51 


through,  and  came  to  Cornvvallis,  where  I  remained  but 
four  days.  I  preached  very  often,  and  the  people  seemed 
to  be  alarmed  and  greatly  -attentive  to  the  gospel.  I  re- 
turned through  llorton  again,  where  I  met  with  some  op- 
position ;  but  God  wus  kind  to  mc,  and  gave  me  strtngtli  U) 
iiice  a  frownin;^  world.  Once  a  standhig  minister  got  up 
vhile  I  was  preaching  and  opposed,  but  the  people  jmid  no 
regard  to  it  and  he  left  the  house.  O  that  Gud  would  open 
his  eyes  before  it  was  too  late  ;  for  what  a  shocking  thing 
it  is  that  a  man  should  pretend  to  preach  that  gospel,  \\hich 
he  is  at  enmity  against,  ruining  his  own  soul  and  those  of 
others.  O  the  injury  that  is  done  by  blind  leaders  to  pre- 
cious and  immortal  souls.  Yea  I  do  not  believe  there  are 
any  men  on  earth  who  do  so  much  damage  to  tlie  Re- 
deemer's Kingdom,  as  those  unconverted  ministers.  () 
that  God  would  change  their  hearts.  I  then  rode  to  Fal- 
mouth, spent  some  happy  houis  with  Uie  christians  there 
in  the  blessed  gospeU  1  went  t»o  Newport,  and  being  in 
haste,  preached  there  but  two  sermons,  and  then  returned 
to  Falmouth, where  I  remained  until  the  15th  of  February. 
The  christians  seemed  revived,  and  some  sinners  under  a 
load  of  sin  inquiring  after  salvation.  I  then  rode  to  llor- 
ton, and  preached  there,  and  foimd  the  Lord  kind  to  me 
beyond  all  expression.  O  that  I  could  continually  live  to 
his  praise.  I  then  went  to  Cornwallis,  and  got  there  in  the 
evening  ;  but  as  they  had  heard  of  my  coming,  there  was 
a  great  throng  of  people  that  attended,  and  there  began  now 
to  be  a  considerable  work  in  the  town.  A  paper  was  drawn 
up,  and  signed  by  about  sixty  persons,  entreating  me  to  a- 
gree  to  stay  with  them  for  some  time  :  but  I  gave  them  no 
other  encouragement,  than  that  I  would  visit  them  as  often 
as  I  could  ;  for  I  dare  not  settle  down  in  any  place  for  a  time, 
as  it  did  not  appear  to  me  to  be  my  duty.  I  went  from 
Cornwallis  again  to  Falmouth  and  Newport,  and  preached 
every  day,  for  there  seemed  to  be  a  thirst  for  the  word. 

March  the  25th,  I  was  sent  for  to  visit  a  young  man, 
who  had  been  a  companion  of  mine  in  sin  and  vanity  ;  he 
never  manifested  any  change,  and  deceased  in  about  two 
days  ;  which  was  very  aftecting  to  me,  remembering  how 
many  hours  and  nights  I  had  been  with  him  in  frolicks. 
1  preached  a  funeral  sermon  and  then  rode  to  llorton, 
where  1  preached,  and  visited  some  under  conviction,  who 
seemed  not  far  from  the  kingdom.     I  then  proceeded  to 


-o 


..•  \A    v\y 


■vv*.*^'*^*.^  /     J 


X  nuu  iiot  the- 


E2 


f  i'=  i 


'  I'' 


1     u 


li  '\ 


l)l     \ii 


i:  ) 

't' 


I;      I 


HI 


I      'li 


53 


RKV.  HENRY  ALI.INe's 


Cornwallis,  where  the  work  of  God  was  still  reviving,  and 
.  there  was  a  great  opposition,  as  there  njost  commonly  ig 
from  legal  professors  and  pharisees  ;  who  made  use  of  eve- 
ry method  they  could  to  obstruct  the  work  ;  disputing  a- 
bout  the  right  of  ordination^  and  the  right  door  for  minis- 
ters to  come  in,  and  would  often  come  to  dispute  with  me 
about  it.     I  toid  them  I  was  very  ready  at  any  time  to  give 
my  sentiment  about  the  power  and  right  of  ordination  either 
in  public  or  private,  and  prove  it  by  the  word  of  God  (as  I 
.  since  have  done  it  from  the  press  in  a  book  entitled,  Two 
I  Mites)  but  still  I  chose  to  spend  my  time  as  much  as  possi- 
ble in  somethinp-  of  more  importance,  that  is,  in  preaching 
the  gospel,  and  labouring  for  the  welfare   of  precious  and 
immor'd  souls  ;  for  I  thought  it  more  for  the  furtherance 
of  my  Master's  cause  to  labour  for  the  vitals  of  rehgion 
than  to  dispute  about  tht  tradition  of  the  fathers  and  exter- 
nal observations.     Sometimes  when  I  have   met  with  a 
number,  who  came  on  purpose  to  dispute,  w  hen  I  saw  tnem 
exercised  v/ith  a  bad  spirit,  would  leave  the  house,  and  told 
them,  I  would  have  nothing  to  say  to  them,  when  they  dis- 
covered such  a  spirit.     Sometimes  they  would  follow  me 
from  house  to  house,  and  pretend,  they  were  contending 
for  the  faith  once  delivered  to  the  saints.     I  told  them,  I 
did  not  doubt,  but  they  might  think  so  ;    for  Saul  verily 
thought,  he  was  doing  God*s  service,  when  persecuting  the 
saints  of  God.     And  thus  the  poor  blind  Pharisees  will 
often  contend  about  their  poor  dry  forms  of  religion,  and 
despise  the  spirit  of  God  as  a  delusion,  at  the  same  time 
pretending  that  they  are  friends  to  the  cause  of  Christ, 
wnd  thereby  ruin  their  own  souls  and  those  of  others. 

May  the  3d,  I  returned  to  Falmouth.  O  what  differ- 
ent a])prehensions  a  prospect  of  death  often  occasions  en  a 
person's  mind.  1  was  now  sent  for  by  one  D,  S.  on  his 
death-bed  ;  who  had  been  one  of  the  most  inveterate  foes 
I  had  among  men  ;  he  would  often  curse  me  and  threaten 
me  ;  but  now  when  1  went  in  the  house,  he  reached  out 
his  hand,  and  in  an  affecting  manner  said,  if  he  had  done  me 
any  wrong,  he  begged  my  forgiveness,  and  would,  if  possi- 
ble, restore  me  four-fold,  I  answered  I  had  nothing  against 
him  on  my  own  account,  neither  had  I,  as  I  knew  of,  until 
then,  discoursed  with  him  concerning  the  state  of  his  soul . 
He  seemed  very  penitent ;  and  gave  me  an  account  of 
something  ok  light  he  lately  receivedi  and  some  manifesta- 


ti 


iving,  and 
nmonly  ig 
jse  of  eve- 
jputing  a- 
for  minis- 
with  mc 
ne  to  give 
tion  either 
God  (as  I 
tied,  Two 
1  as  possi- 
preaching 
cioiis  and 
rtherance 
F  religion  - 
md  exter- 
:t  with  a 
saw  tnem 
,  and  told 
they  dis- 
ollow  me 
nitending 
them,  I 
ul  verily 
uting  the 
sees  will 
jion,  and 
ime  time 
f  Christ, 
rs. 

at  differ- 
)ns  en  a 
).  on  his 
rate  toes 
threaten 
hcd  out 
done  me 
if  possi- 
;  against 
of,  until 
lis  soul, 
ount  of 
nifesta- 


LIFi:  AND  JOLTvKAL. 


53 


tlon  of  joy,  which  seemed  rather  to  give  one  a  hope  of  him, 
but  I  was  not  fully  satisfied.  He  insisted  on  my  company 
as  much  as  possible  until  he  died.  I  attended  his  funeral 
and  preached  a  sermon.  I  remained  in  town  until  the  16th 
May,  and  then  set  out  for  Annapolis,  as  I  had  promised, and 
preached  that  evening  at  liorton  ;  the  next  day  I  rode  to 
Cornwallis,  stayed  over  the  sabbath  and  preached  ;  and, 
blessed  be  God,  although  there  was  much  opposition  from 
earth  and  hell,  the  work,  of  God  was  still  reviving.  IVIon- 
day  evening,  met  with  a  number  of  men,  enemies  to  j 
the  work,  wiih  the  minister  with  them,  who  conducted  in 
so  unchristian  like  manner,  that  I  was  obliged  to  keep  my 
tongue  as  with  a  bridle,  lest  I  should  speak  unadvisedly  vvitli 
my  lips.  Indee'!  the  contest  rose  so  high,  and  they  disputed 
with  so  much  w^n'mth,  that  I  had  not  time  to  vindicate  the 
truth,  without  proceeding  in  a  manner  I  never  was  obliged 
to  before.  I  took  out  my  watcli,  and  held  it  on  my  knee, 
telling  them,  that  I  did  not  come  there  to  wrangle  with 
them,  but  to  defend  the  truth,  which  I  could  not  do  for  want 
of  an  opportunity,  therefore  I  intended  to  allow  each  one 
five  minutes  to  discourse,  and  I  would  have  my  five  min- 
utes also,  and  if  any  man  exceeded  fi^  e  minutes  I  would 
leave  the  room  immediately.  They  seemed  much  sur- 
prised ;  but  I  told  them,  they  could  not  think  it  hard  nor 
strange  ;  when  they  had  observed  that  for  some  time,  I 
could  not  say  a  word,  but  sat  and  heard  them  reflect ;  after 
which  I  was  enabled  to  the  conviction  of  the  spectators  to 
hold  up  light  and  support  the  truth.  But  I  may  say  at  the 
best,  such  disputes  arc  very  unprofitable,  and  1  hope  for  the 
future  to  be  more  guarded  against  such  waste  of  time,  for 
1  would  rather  have  the  enemy  say,  that  I  was  afraid  to 
hold  the  contest  than  to  be  guilty  of  spending  time  so  un- 
profitably.  The  work  of  God  was  so  powerful  in  this 
town,  tiiat  I  preached  sometimes  two  sermons  a  day  for 
five  or  six  days  together,  and  the  people  attended  in  great 
numbers.  I  discoursed  of  little  else  but  religion  night  and  ^ 
day. 

May  the  27th  I  set  out  for  Annapolis  from  Cornwal- 
lis :  and  a  blessed  day  it  was  to  my  soul.  I  had  much  of 
the  presence  of  God,  and  faith  to  believe  that  God  would  go 
with  me,  and  not  let  my  journey  be  in  vain  :  and  although 
I  was  alone  (with  regard  to  company)  yet  I  Iiad  not  the 

'  E2 


!■ : 


[Mm 


\ 


',i;i  •^^ 


!    :l 


ill    '■ 
.  i    ■ 


til     i\\' 

; 

li         '.;  1 


r 


54 


REV.  ItKNRT  ALLXNE^S 


least  concern  on  my  mind,  though  going  among  strangers,  - 
and  felt  as  wilHng  to  go  and  venture  on  the  Lord,  as  to 
preach,  where  I  was  ever  so  intimate.  I  rode  24  miles, 
and  although  the  people  were  very  civil,  yet  I  had  so  much 
'  of  the  presence  of  God,  that  I  rather  chose  to  be  alone,  be- 
cause it  was  hard  singing  the  Lord's  song  in  a  strange  land.. 
I  walked  out  into  the  woods  and  spent  most  of  the  evening 
there,  and  enjoyed  what  the  world  knows  nothing  of.  O 
the  wondrous  love  and  condescension  of  God  to  a  worm  of 
the  dust !  What  shall  I  say,  what  shall  I  think,  or  what  re- 
turns shall  I  make  ? 

How  can  the  great  Jehovah  sstoop  so  low' 
To  save  my  soul  from  everlasting  wo, 
And  lead  me  by  his  love  'vhere'er  I  go  ? 
Amazing  grace  !  that  such  an  heir  of  hell 
Sould  ever  in  the  arms,  of  Jesus  dwell. 

The  next  day  I  rode  16  miles,  and  remained  until  the 
sabbath.     The  people  gave  greut  attention  when  I  preach- 
ed, but  I  did  not  see  any  great  work  of  conviction  on  their 
minds.     There  was  a  popish  priest  amongst  the  hearers, 
who  was  greatly  enraged,  after  the  sermon  was  over,  at  the 
doci^ine  I  preached,  but  said  nothing  to  me.  The  next  day 
I  rode  with  a  young  man  to  see  the  minister  of  the  place  ; 
but  I  soon  found  by  discoursing  with  him,  sufficient  reason  to 
\  fear,  that  the  man  was  an  utter  stranger  to  conversion,  and 
'  therefore   preached,  (or  rather  read)  an  unknown    God.. 
The  next  day  I  crossed  the  river..     The  committee  of  the 
meeting  house  on  that  side  of  the  water  came  to  desire  me 
to  preach.     I  went  accordingly  and  preached,  and  great 
numbers  attended.     Soon  after  they  came  with  a  request, 
that  I  would  tarry  with  them  for  a  season,  but  I  refused, 
telling  them,  I  did  not  dare  to  do  it,  as  1  had  no  call  from 
God  to  settle  any  where.     I  staid  the   sabbath  over,  and 
told  them,  that  1  would  visit  them  as  of  tn  as  I  could*    I 
then  rode  down  to  the  town  ot  Annapolis,  crossed  the  river, 
preached  a  lecture,  and  visited  many  people..     But  O  the 
darkness  of  the  land  (called  mristians  too.)     The  name  of 
conversion,  or  tie  power  of  religion,  was  rai'ely  mentioned. 
Their  minister  woiild  only  re?t!  over  an  old  dry  lesson  of 
morals  and  forms  which  tliey  hiul  written  down.   Blind  lead- 
ers ol  the  blind,  O  that  (iod  would   have  mercy  on  them, 
and  open  their  eyes,  before  they  and  their  hearers  fall  irre- 
coverably into  eternal  ruin.     1  then  rode  again  up  to  Wil- 


LIFK  AND  JOURNAL, 


55 


trangers, 
d,  as  to 
4  miles, 
so  much 
lone,  be- 
(ige  land., 
evening 
gof.  O 
worm  of 
what  re- 


until  the 
preach- 
on  their 
hearers, 
r,  at  the 
Inext  day 
e  place  ; 
eason  to 
ion,  and 
n   God., 
e  of  the 
isire  me 
id  great 
Irequest, 
]  refused, 
lall  from 
^er,  and 
)ukL    I 
[le  river, 

O  the 
mine  of 

>tioned. 
isson  of 

id  lead- 
them, 
fall  irre- 
Ito  Wil- 


mot,  and  preached  4  or  5  days  there  ;   where,  blessed  bs 
God,  there  began  to  be  a  work  of  grace,  and   many  were 
pricked  to  the  heart,  and  crying  out   under  the  weight  of 
their  sins.     Yea  they  were  so  thristing  for  the   word,  that 
when  I  came  away  6  or  7  double  horses  came  with   me  a 
number  of  miles.     I  then  stopped  and  staid  all  night,  and 
preached  again  the  next  morning  ;  then  I  bid  them  farewell 
and  left  them  ;  some  seemed  to  be  not  far  from  tlie   king- 
dom.    And,  blessed  be  my  Lord  and  Master,  for  the  suc- 
cess of  my  journey.     Through  his  grace,  I  trust  some  of 
those  souls  will  have  cause    forever  to   praise  his  blessed 
name  for  the  messages  r>f  peace  sent  by  me.  a  worm  of  the\ 
dust.     When  I  came  to  Cornwallis  I  heard  that  there  were'^ 
^  two  ministers  come  from  Cobequid  (without  my  requesting)  ■ 
to  inquire  into  my  principles  and  preaching.     Tin^y  were 
men  that  I  had  heard  of,  but  never  seen.     1  went  to  hear 
them  preach,  and  had  reason  to  hope  that  one  of  tliem  was 
a  minister  ol  Christ,  although  something  sunk  into  a  form 
without  the  p^jwer.     The  week  following  they  both  came 
to  see  me  with  a  number  of  men,  whom  I  knew  to  be  cue-  • 
mies  to  the  power  of  religion,  which  made  me  suspect,  tliey 
did  not  come  out  of  love  and  tenderness.  However,  though  I 
had  not  requested  their  coming  to  examine  me,  I  was  very 
•    ready  to  discourse  with  them.     I  vindicaied  my  principlea 
of  religion.     They  inquired  after  my  right  to   preach.    1 
told  them,  I  trusted  my  authority  was  from  heaven  ;  but  !• 
did  not  know  whether  it  was  needful  to  discover  it  to  them, 
finding  them  much  against  tlie  power.     They   asked  me 
for  my  credentials.     I  immediately   shewed  them  what  I 
had  from  the  ciiurch,    which  they  condemned,  because  it 
was  not  from  a  soci  ty  of  ministers :  which  caused  a  dis- 
pute to  begin,  they  affirming  that  1  iiad  no  right  to  preach,* 
W'thout  a  license  from  a  society  of  ministers,  and  I  affirm- 
ed that  I  had.     They  likewise  thoug!it  it  next  to  impossi- 
ble for  a  man  to  be  called  to  preach,  wIvj  iiad  no  college 
learnin;^.     Rut  the  chief  debate  w^s  about  the  nower  of  or- 
dination, which  they  pret/Mv'.ol  was  handed  down  by  a  sue-  * 
ccssive  chain  from  the  A])o;>les  ;  w>.ich  T  endeavf>ured  to 
shew  them  was  too  far  brole  i  ever  to  retaii>  the  po-ver  of  or- 
dination that  way,   and  toid  t  em  T  could  ea*11y  provt-  it  to 
be  in  the  church.  'Thevseemel  to  reflect  ba'  d  on  avj. telling 
i  me  that  I  was  breakinvi:  thiout^h  il'  order.  I  <old  them  that 
,i;,  there  was  no  people  in  the  woridmorr  -•^^-  "     -  ' ^ 


53 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


I!  I 


!!!! 


,.i        II!  I 


trddkions  of  men  than  the  church  of  Rome  ;  and  where  was 
uil  their  religion,  or  what  had  they  but  a  dry  form  ?  and 
therefore,  although  I  strictly  held  to  all  the  orders  of  God's 
house,  yet  1  looked  on  the  power  of  God's  Spirit  far  more 
important  than  the  traditions,  the  bare  traditions  of  men. 
They  signified  they  could  not  bid  me  God  speed.  I  told 
them  I  did  not  request  it.  When  they  found  I  was  es- 
tablished in  my  sentiments  and  not  easily  moved,  they  be* 
gan  to  be  more  moderate,  and  to  advise  me,  making  me  an 
offer  of  their  libraries,  and  what  assisteuice  they  could 
give  me,  if  1  would  leave  oft*  preachiug  until  I  was  better 
qiudified  :  I  thanked  them  for  their  kindness,  as  1  imagined 
they  meant  well ;  but  I  told  them  the  Lord  knevr  before  he 
called  me,  how  unqualified  I  was  as  to  human  learning, 
and  as  he  had  called  me,  I  trusted  he  would  qualify  me  for 
whatever  he  had  for  me  to  do.  1  told  them  besides,  that 
the  work  of  God  was  then  prospering  in  my  hands,  and 
therefore  I  did  not  dare  to  desert  it.  They  told  me  they 
looked  on  me  as  a  stiff  young  man,  and  then  went  away. 
I  remained  in  Corawallis  about  five  days,  preached  often, 
raid  visited  those  under  conviction,  and  the  Lord  was  with 
me,  and  blessed  my  labours,  and  may  his  blessed  name 
have  the  praise. 

July  the  5th.  I  went  from  CornwaUis  to  Hortonand 
preached  there  once  ;  from  thence  I  went  to  Falmouth, 
where  I  had  the  happiness  to  find  one  of  my  sisters,  who 
had  long  been  under  conviction,  and  in  such  great  distress, 
that  she  was  sometimes  almost  ready  to  sink  (yea  to  that 
degree  was  her  distress  of  mind,  that  it  consumed  the  flesh 
off  of  her  body,  and  brought  her  very  low)  had  found  the 
blessed  Redeemer,  and  was  rejoicing  in  his  love,  telling 
what  God  had  done  for  her  soul.  O  the  wonders  of  God's 
indulgent  hand  to  the  children  of  men  !  How  great  is  his 
love  I  How  unbounded  is  his  grace  I  O  that  I  was  al- 
ways filled  with  gratitude.  I  saw  there  also  three  young 
men  who  came  upwards  of  40  miles  under  great  distress 
of  mind  to  hear  the  gospel ;  two  of  them  have  since  been 
brought  to  the  knowledge  of  Redeeming  love.  I  remained 
in  Falmouth  until  the 20th  of  July,and  there  appearedacon- 
siderable  stir  among  many  of  the  young  peojile,  inquiring 
afterthe  blessed  Jesus.  O  that  they  might  be  brought  to  the 
knowledge  of  Him.  I  went  then  over  to  Newport,  preach- 
ed on  the  Sabbath  in  the  field,  the  house  not  being  able  to 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL* 


5f 


md  >7here  was 
J  form  ?  and 
'ders  of  God's 
pirit  far  more 
ions  of  men. 
peed.  I  told 
r»d  I  was  es« 
)ved,  they  be- 
taking me  an 
f;   they   could 

I  was  better 
is  1  imagined 
lew  before  he 
iian  learning, 
[ualify  me  for 

besides,  that 

hands,   and 

told   me  they 

went  away, 
cached  often , 
)rd  was  with 
)lessed  name 

Hortonand 
)  Falmouth, 
sisters,  who 
'tat  distress, 
[yea  to  that 
ned  the  flesh 
d  found  the 
love,  telling 
ers  of  God's 
great  is  his 
t  I  was  al- 
three  young 
eat  distress 
K  since  been 

I  remained 
)earedacon- 
i,  inquiring 
■ought  to  the 
ort,  preach- 
eing  able  to 


/ 


lit 


contain  the  people  ;  and  the  Lord  was  there  with  his  Spir- 
it. I  then  returned  to  Falmouth,  and  from  thence  went 
through  Horton  to  Comwallis,  where  I  found  the  work  of 
Ciod  still  prospering.  A  great  number  met  almost  every  even- 
ing,  and  continued  until  eleven  and  twelve  o'clock  at  night, 
praying,  exhorting,  singing,  some  of  them  telling  what 
God  had  done  for  their  souls,  and  some  groaning  under  a 
load  of  sin. 

August  the  3d.  A  committee  was  chosen  by  the 
people,  and  came  with  a  request  to  me,  that  I  would  engage 
wilh  them  a  certain  season,  because  they  wanted  my  as- 
sistance in  gathering  together  m  church  order.  My  an- 
swer to  them  in  writing  was  as  follows  :— 

In  answer  to  your  request  as  a  committee  I  must  ac- 
quaint you  first — That  although  on  account  of  the  divisions 
now  existing  in  this  town  you  may  reasonably  imagine  that 
it  is  not  very  a?!;reeable  for  me  to  remain,  yet  considering 
your  destitute  circumstances  together  with  the  desire  of  so 
great  a  number  of  people,  and  trusting  thac  the  Almighty 
God  ( without  whom  we  can  do  nothing)  will  undertake  to 
heal  our  divisions  by  increasing  a  christian  like  spirit  of  love 
among  us,  I  must  acknowledge  as  yet  it  appears  my  duty 
to  rem?  in.  But  secondly  as  the  circumstances  of  the  coun- 
try now  is,  I  am  under  some  obligations  to  visit  the  neigh- 
boring towns,  which  are  alike  destitute,  for  which  reason  I 
cannot  reside  here  all  the  time  ;  therefore  I  have  concluded) 
after  my  return  from  Annapolis,  (if  God  permit)  to  reside 
here  six  months  of  the  nine  ensuing  months.  Thirdly  as 
for  many  reasons,  it  has  been  in  agitation  for  sometime,  my 
further  introduction  into  the  work  of  the  ministry,  which 
cannot  be  effected  until  some  better  regulations  (respecting 
the  church  affairs)  shall  be  made,  no  w  when  by  the  com- 
mittees, church  or  members  of  the  church  gospel-meas- 
ures shall  be  taken  to  effect  the  same  ;  I  shall  then  stand 
t-eady,  as  I  promised,  to  proceed  so  far  as  directed  by  the 
word  and  Spirit  of  God.  Fourthly  and  lastly.  As  for  the 
methods  and  conditions  of  my  being  supported  as  a  gospel- 
minister,  I  shall  wholly  leave  it  to  your  discretion  and  the 
word  of  God  :  and  subscyribe  myself 

The  sinner's  friend  and  servant,  and  well- 
wisher  af  your  everlasting  happiness, 

HENRY  ALLINE. 


ill  111.  ^ 


REV,  HENRY  ALLINE's 


I     ,1 


Which  answer  gave  great  satisfaction  to  both  the  commit- 
tee and  the  people. 

August  the  i4th.  I  set  out  with  a  young  man,  who 
came  for  me  to  go  again  to  Annapolis.  I  rode  through  all 
the  county  of  Annapolis,  preached  night  and  day,  and  vis- 
iting the  people,  found  the  work  of  God  increasing  ;  some 
souls  born  to  Christ  rejoicing  in  the  Redeemer's  love,  and 
others  having  no  rest  night  nor  day,  but  groaning  under  a 
sense  of  their  condition.  I'or  my  own  part,  (blessed  be  God) 
I  found  still  longingdesires  to  serve  those  poor  mourning  souls 
in  the  name  of  my  Lord  and  Master.  Yea  I  thought  there 
was  nothing,  that  Go4«ould  do  for  me,  would  make  me  so 
rejoice  as  to  send  me  with  glad  tidings  to  poor  perishing 
souls,  and  mourning  sinners.  I  preached  so  often  and  rode 
so  much,  that  sometimes  I  would  seem  almost  worn  out ; 
and  yet  in  a  few  hours  would  be  bo  refreshed,  that  I  could  la- 
bour again  for  twelve  hours  in  discoursing,praying,  preach-, 
ing  and  exhorting,  and  feel  strong  on  my  lungs.  O  the 
goodness  of  God  to  me  a  worm  i  What  storms  and  fa- 
tigues both  in  body  and  mind  has  he  carried  me  through. 
O  what  happy  hours  have  I  enjoyed  in  his  vineyard  night 
and  day.  When  I  had  preached  through  all  the  county,  I 
returned  to  Cornwallis,  where  I  expected  to  stay  some  time ; 
but  there  came  a  young  man  from  Falmouth  desiring  me 
to  come  and  visit  some  people,  who  were  sick,  and  had  a  great 
desire  to  see  me,  I  accordingly  went.  I  had  preached  but 
one  sermon  and  visited  the  sick  but  a  few  hours,  when  I 
was  sent  for  from  Cornwallis,  to  attend  a  funeral  there  of 
a  woman,  who  died  very  suddenly.  She  was  well  and 
made  her  cheese  in  the  morning,  and  died  before  ten  o'- 
clock in  the  forenoon.  I  remained  now  in  Cornwallis  for 
some  time  s  preached  very  often,  and  visited  the  people,  es- 
pecially those  under  the  work  of  the  Spirit.  In  the  mean 
while  came  some  of  the  standing  ministers,  offering  to  li- 
cense me,  if  I  would  acknowledge,  that  I  had  done  wrong, 
in  preaching  so  long,  though  with  the  approbation  of  the 
churches,  without  a  license  from  the  ministers.  I  told  them 
that  I  was  so  far  from  acknowledging  that  I  had  done 
wrong  in  preaching  by  receiving  only  the  approbation  or 
credentials  from  the  church,  that  I  still  held  the  church  to 
have  the  prerogative,  and  intended  to  use  what  influence  I 
could  until  my  dying  day  to  .^estore  that  power,  which  the 
ministers  had  robbed  the  churches  of,  as  far  as  God  shall 


ed  on  the  Sabbath  in  the  field,  the  house  pot  being  able  to 


Y 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


59 


the  commit- 

ng  man,  wlio 
^  thrcugh  all 
day,  and  vis- 
ising  ;  some 
:r's  love,  and 
ing  under  a 
ssed  be  God) 
mrning  souls 
lought  there 
make  me  so 
r  perishing 
;en  and  rode 

worn  out ; 
at  I  could  Ja- 
ng^ preach- 
es.    O  the 
ms  and  fa- 
e  through, 
yard  night 
e  county,  I 
sometime; 
esiring  me 
lad  a  great 
cached  but 
s,  when  I 
\1  there  of 

well  and 
re  ten  o'- 
iT/allis  for 
eople,  es- 
he  mean 
^ing  to  li- 
le  wrong, 
1   of  the  ^ 
old  them 
ad    done 
:)ation  or 
hurch  to 
iuence  I 
hich  the 
od  shull 


enable  me.  After  this  I  went  to  Falmouth,  where  I  remain- 
till  the  26th  of  October,  enjoyed  some  happiness,  aiid  hap- 
py days  among  the  people  of  God  ;  then  went  to  Newport, 
remained  there  about  three  days  and  returned  to  Fal- 
mouth again  ;  and  much  of  the  the  goodness  of  God  I  saw 
and  enjoyed.  I  shall  never  be  able  to  express  with  my  pen 
the  various  scenes,  which  I  went  through  in  my  soul. 
Sometimes  rejoicing  and  then  in  great  trials  ;  yet  I  am 
^  convinced  that  it  will  prove  for  my  good.  O  tluit  I  could 
'  always  keep  near  to  the  meek  and  lowly  Jesus. 

Bear  me,  thou  nieek,  thou  everlasting  dove. 
Above  my  trials  on  the  wings  oHove  ;  • 

f       '  And  grant  me  daily  wisdom,  lo^fl^and  grace, 

That  I  with  joy  may  run  the  christian  race. 

I  tHEN  went   to   Cornwallis,  where  I  found  all  my 
:  friends  well ;  the  christians  all  very  lively  in  religion  ;  and 
some  conrerts  now  declaring  the  sweetness  of  redeeming 
love,  and  what  God  had  done  for  their  souls.     I  oftentimes 
enjoyed  much  happiness  among  them,  to  sec  them  so  cn- 
i  gaged  in  the  Redeemer's  cause,  and  to  see  what  love  ce- 
mented their  souls  together. 
-  The  20th  November  I   set  out  for  Wilmot.     I  ex- 

'  pected  some  company  to  go  with  me,  but  was  happily  dis- 
appointed, as  they  were  not  agreeable  to  me.  I  was  much 
indulged  with  the  presence  of  my  blessed  Lord  and  Master. 
O  who  would  not  follow  the  blessed  Lamb  of  God,  to  enjoy 
what  I  have  often  found  in  his  blessed  ways.  I  think  I 
can  say  that  sometimes  I  have  rode  miles  and  miles  con- 
versing with  God,  and  enjoyed  that  which  the  world  could 
never  give,  nor  take  away  :  sometimes  I  would  get  down 
from  my  horse,  and  step  in  the  woods  and  rejoice  for  some 
,  time,  and  often  wrestling  with  God,  to  go  with  me,  and 
give  me  success,  and  have  been  blessed  with  a  satisfactory 
evidence,  that  I  should  see  his  work  prosper  before  I  re- 
turned. When  I  came  below  the  tovm,  I  found  the  Spirit 
of  God  still  troubling  the  waters,  and  some  souls  happy  ; 
although  the  opposition  was  very  high,  especially  from  the 
minister  of  the  place,  and  many  of  his  church.  O  the  dam- 
age that  is  done  by  unconverted  ministers,  and  legal  pro- 
fessors. I  have  found  them  in  my  travels  more  inveterate 
against  the  power  of  religion,  than  the  open  profane.  But, 
blessed  be  God,  although  they  left  no  stone  unturned  to  ob- 
struct what  they  called  a  delusion ;  yet  the  work  still  in- 


ing  able  tc^ 


«0 


«EV.  HENRY  ALLINt'S 


l!!'. 


;'  I'd 


!|:    1':' 

I 


fl 


If 


creased,  and  Cod  gave  me  such  a  sense  of  divine  things, 
that  I  endeavoured  to  pass  by  all  the  reproaches  as  much 
as  possible. 

December.  When  I  had  been  through  the  whole 
county,  and  had  visited  and  preached  to  all  the  societies,  I 
bid  them  farewell,  committed  them  to  God  and  returned  to 
Cornwallis.  I  found  the  kindness  and  love  of  my  blessed 
Jesus  continued  to  me  still.  O  that  my  soul  was  more 
humble  at  his  blessed  feet.  It  was  the  20lh  December 
when  I  returned  to  Cornwallis,  where  I  found  some  of  the 
christians  more  1  old  to  speak  in  public,  which  I  endeavour- 
ed to  encourage  as  much  as  possible  :  some  poor  souls 
bowed  down  and  m«|urning  under  a  sense  of  their  guilt ; 
while  others,  poor  unhappy  souls,  were  making  a  scoff  and 
derision  at  the  work  of  God.      O  that  thev   knew  in  this 

0 

their  day  the  things  that  belong  to  their  peace,  before  they 
are  forever  hid  from  their  eyes.  It  was  enough  to  con- 
vince any  one  that  it  was  the  work  of  God  to  see  the  enmi- 
ty, rage  and  darkness  of  that  siprit,  that  was  night  and  day 
engaged  against  it.  Many  of  those  who  were  called  chris- 
tians would  labour  hoiu's  and  hours  with  harsh  reflections 
on  those  who  were  attending,  where  the  waters  were  troub- 
led, to  keep  them  from  it. 

January  1st,  1778.  I  went  to  Falmouth, where  it  was 
enough  to  make  a  christian's  heart  rejoice  to  see  the  alteration 
of  things.  A  little  time  ago  they  were  going  on  in  all  man- 
ner of  wickedness,  frolicking,  sin  and  vanity  ;  and  now  meet- 
ing to  praise  the  Lord,  the  great  Redeemer  of  mankind, 
and  thirsting  after  the  word  of  life.  Some,  who  a  few 
years  ago  were  the  ringleaders  to  vice,  now  singing  Hosan- 
nas  to  the  son  of  David,  and  live  so  exemplary,  that  they 
are  an  ornament  to  the  gospel  they  profess.  O  may  the 
blessed  Jesus  have  all  the  praise.  O  what  great  things  has 
God  done  for  this  desert  land  I  The  wilderness  is  become  a 
fruitful  field,  and  the  desert  blossoms  as  a  rose.  When  I 
had  been  in  town  about  three  weeks  I  returned  to  Cornwal- 
lis, where  I  had  likewise  blessed  days  and  hours ;  for  God 
was  there  of  a  truth  ;  and  I  spent  some  blessed  moments 
with  them.  One  evening  after  I  was  in  bed,  I  was  very 
much  troubled  in  my  mind,  which  seemed  to  forebode  no 
good.  I  got  up  in  the  morning  under  gloomy  apprehen- 
sions of  some  disagreeable  turn,  and  remained  so  almost  all 
the  day  ;  in  the  evening  I  preached,  after  which  I  invited 


V    J 


divine  things, 
ches  as  much 

gh  the  whole 
lie  societies,  I 
nd  returned  to 
of  my  blessed 
)ul  was  more 
ih  December 
d  some  of  the 
1  I  endeavour* 
le  poor  souls 
f  their  guilt ; 
ng  a  scoff  and 
knew  in  this 
e,  before  they 
nough  to  COP- 
I  see  the  enmi- 
night  and  day 
•e  called  chris- 
irsh  reflections 
ivs  were  troub- 

i,  where  it  was 
the  alteration 
)n  in  all  man- 
md  now  meet- 
of  mankind, 
who  a  few 
[nging  Hosan- 
UT,  that  they 

0  may  the 
iat.  things  has 

is  become  a 
te.     When  I 

to  Cornwal- 

s :  for  God 

Ised  moments 

1  was  very 
forebode  no 

ly  apprehen- 
1  so  almost  all 
lich  I  invited 


LIFK  AND  JOURNAI. 


ei 


/ 


two  of  my  christian  friends  to  my  lodging,  one  of  them  told 
me,  he  had  had  diirk  and  distressing  hours  for  some  time, 
occasioned  by  a  certain  text  that  bore  upon  his  mind.  I 
asked  him  what  text  it  was.  He  answered  the  words  arc 
these  :  Sleep  on  now  and  take  thy  rest :  and  he  asked  my 
mind  about  them.  I  immediately  told  him  that  it  appear- 
Jk  ed  to  me,  the  interpretation  at  that  time  carried  a  very 
^  gloomy  aspect.  He  asked  me  what  I  learned  from  them  to 
us  in  these  days.  I  answered  him  thus,  while  I  was  striving  - 
with  my  spirit  and  labouring  among  you  for  the  salvation  of 
souls,  intreating  you  to  be  up  and  doing,  while  the  waters 
were  troubled,  by  watching  and  praying,  which  you  have 
too  much  neglected,  while  I  v^s  with  you,  and  now   sleep 

;^  if  you  can  ;  for  be  assured  there  is  a  dying  hour  a  coming.  ' 
He  said  it  expressed  much  the  same  to  him.     I  then  told 

■:,  him  what  I  had  passed  through  in  my  own  mind  the  night 
before,  and  how  it   bore  on  my   mind.      We  went  to  my 

;  lodging  and  about  eleven  o'clock  at  night,  had  us  1  may  say 
,'  very  suddenly  such   horror  of  darkness,  as  was  said  Abra- 
ham was  once  in.     My  whole  soul  was   benighted,  and  a 
;  4'^t:orm  of  temptation  rose  up  against  me  so  that  I  was  oblig- 
^^€d  to  say  with  David,  The  strong  bulls  of  Bashan  have  be-    ' 
^set  me  around.     O  the  darkness  and  distress  of  my  mind. 
U'liis  was  the  first  distress,  darkness  or  doubt  of  my  standing  " 
hat  ever  I  had  known  since  my  conversion  :  for  now  I  gave    . 
iway  to  the  enemy  (it  being  new   to  me)   so  that  I  wholly 

'doubted  my  standing,  that  I  tried  to  invalidate  all  the  evi- 

jdcnces  I  had  since  my  conversion  of  having  enjoyed  the 
presence  of  God,  and  to  throw  it  all  away:' yet  I  found 
something  like  an  anchor  of  hope  within  the  veil,  which  I 
could  not  get  rid  of;  though  I  tried  much,  and  prayed  to 
God  to  take  it  away.  O  the  unspeakable  distress  I  was  un- 
der I  I  could  neither  eat,  drink  nor  sleep  with  any  satis- 
faction ;  for  it  was  wholly  new  to  me,  so  tliat  I  knew  not 
what  to  do,  what  to  say,  where  I  had  been,  where  I  now 
was,  nor  where  I  was  going.  O  my  soul  cried  out  to  some 
unknown  God.  Help,  help,  O  my  God  :  if  thou  art  mine  ; 
if  not,  O  my  God  undeceive  me.  My  darkness  and  dis- 
tress was  without  any  relief  more  than  a  minute  at  a  tin.e, 

•for  three  days  and  three  nights  (as  Jonah  was)  and  I  could 
feay  with  him,  that  I  was  in  the  belly  of  I. ell ;  I  v/cnt  down 

io  the  bottom  of  the  mour.tains,  and  the  earth  v  ith  her  bars 

F  . 


X 


<52 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


,t:i  I 


y>    iiu^' 


■;     .i 


i'- 


M'ere  about  mc.  But  my  God  remembered  mc,  and 
brought  me  again  to  rejoice  in  the  wonders  of  his  love, 
and  to  triumph  over  the  powers  of  darkness.  (.)  the  un- 
spinikable  happiness  my  soul  enjoyed  when  God  delivered 
me.  I  am  convinced  it  was  all  hi  great  love,  yea,  of  unspeak- 
able benefit  to  fit  me  for  the  work  I  had  before  me,  which 
God  knew,  though  I  did  not.  O  let  me  remember,  and  for- 
ever adore  his  love. 

Fedruary  the  20th, I  went  to  Falmouth,  and  found  my 
christian  friends  happy.  I  related  to  them  the  unccinmon 
scene  I  had  been  carried  through,  and  some  of  what  I  had 
endured,  and  did  still  endure,  and  how  God  had  appeared 
for  my  relief.  They  commiserated  me,  and  rejoiced  that 
God  had  brought  me  through  it,  and  told,  that  it  was  all  in 
love  to  me,  to  prepare  me  for  what  1  was  to  pass  through, 
and  to  fit  me  for  a  great  work,  and  v/ould  alt  at  last  prove 
for  my  good,  and  the  furtherance  of  the  gospel  :  it  likewise 
proved  a  means  of  stirring  up  their  minds,  and  tlie  minds 
of  many  others.  I  remained  in  Falmouth  until  the  10th  of 
March,  prcacliing,  visiting  and  exhorting  both  saints  and 
sinners,  and  then  returned  to  Cornwallis  ;  where  I  sooh  saw 
that  gloomy  and  distressing  day,  which  I  had  before  seen 
at  a  distance.  The  small  pox  that  had  been  through  other 
towns  very  favourably,  was  now  spreading  and  proving  ve- 
ry mortal.  Religion  was  as  it  were  driven  away,  but  sor- 
row and  distress  were  there  ;  for  numbers  were  down  rnth 
that  malignant  distemper,  and  very  corhmonly  three  buried 
in  a  day.  O  what  a  day  of  darkness  this  was  ;  for  they 
were  all  taken  down  at  once,  as  they  were  mostly  under 
inoculation.  Thus  the  judgments  of  God  are  (often  as  it 
was  now)  so  far  from  working  a  reformation,  or  increas- 
ing religion  ^  that  it  seemed  to  banish  it,  and  chain  the 
people's  minds  down  under  an  excess  of  sorrow  and  slav- 
ish fear.  O  what  a  desolation  spread  through  the  town, 
until  every  house  was  tried  with  sickness  or  death,  and  eve- 
ry face  gathered  blackness. 

i^  PRiL  the  17th,  I  went  to  Horton,  preached  there  as  I 
went  through  :  but  religion  was  likewise  low  there.  I  then 
went  to  Falmouth,  where  I  remained  a  few  days,  spent 
much  time  with  a  woman  under  strong  temptations :  she 
bad  been  under  conviction,  and  w^as  now  tempted  to  believe, 
that  there  was  no  mercy  for  her.  O  how  strong  are  the 
powers  of  darkness   on  the  minds  of  sinners,  when  broke 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


63 


\  tnc,  and 
of  bis  love, 
(.)  the  im- 

)d  delivered 

of\irispeak- 

me,  Avhich 

icr,  und  I'or- 


id  found  my 
unccinnion 
what  I  had 
ad  appeared 
rejoiced  that 
it  was  all  in 
iss  through, 
at  last  prove 
:  it  likewise 
dthe  minds 
I  the  10th  of 
h   saints  and 
re  I  sooH  saw 
1  before  seen 
irouc;h  other 
i  proving  ve- 
tvay,  but  sor- 
•e  down  vath 
three  buried 
'\s  ;  for  they 
iiostly  under 
e  (often  as  it 
or  increas- 
id  chain   the 
■ow  and  slav- 
^h  the  town, 
ith,  and  eve- 

led  there  as  I 
here.   I  then 

days,  spent 
3tations:  she 
:ed  to  believe, 
ong    are  the 

when  broke 


A' 


loose.  But  l)lcss'jd  be  God,  he  is  our  helper  still,  and  in 
i\im  we  may  rejoice.  I  then  went  to  Newport,  preached 
in  a  large  barn,  atul  there  appeared  some  movings  of  Ciod's 
Spirit,  after  which  1  retiu'ned  with  some  christian  friends 
to  Tahnouth,  where  1  enjoyed  great  satisfaction,  when  in 
public. 

M  w  the  3d,  a  number  being  met  to  spend  the  evening, 
about  ten  o'clock  came  in  a  young  man  from  ConnvalHs  af- 

^  ter  me  to  go  and  see  the  womin  of  the  house  where  1  had 
boarded,  who  was  at  the  point  of  death  with  tiie  small  pox  ; 
this  struck  me  to  the  heart,  not  on  account  of  her  death,  but 
as  to  the  state  of  her  soul :  for  when  I  left  lier  last,  she  had 
not  had  any  evidence  of  her  conversion,  but  had  been  a  long 
time  under  great  distress.  1  immediately  set  out  and  rode 
all  night;  but  when  I  came  there  (idthough  I  was  grieved  at 
losing  her  company,  as  I  saw  she  \>as  on  the  confines  of  eter- 
nity) yet  my  distress  was  removed,  when  I  talked  with  her; 
for  she  gave  me  an  account  of  her  conversion  the  same  day 
of  my  leaving  her  last,  after  I  was  gone.  O  how  this  rela- 
tion (especially  finding  it  to  be  the  gospel-work  and  having 
full  fe'Iowship  with  her)  made  my  heart  leap  for  joy  ;  for 
my  soul  could  witness,  that  it  was  a  work  of  grace  by  the 
blessed  Redeemer.  She  continued  but  two  days,  and  left 
the  world,  taking  flight,  I  trust,  to  the  glorious  realms  of 
light.  O  shall  I,  shall  I  once  join  that  sacred  band,  tell  me 
O  my  God  ;  can  it  possibly  be  ?  yes,  through  thy  boundless 
grace  it  is,  and  I  trust  I  shall.  I  staid  at  Cornwallis  to  at- 
tend the  funeral,  and  I  preached  a  funeral  sermon  from  1st 
Thessalonians  4th,  from  the  13th  verse  to  the  end. 

May  the  27th,  I  went  to  Annapolis  with  a  young  man 
that  came  for  me,  where  I  remained  about  five  weeks.  O 
t!ie  great  goodness  of  God  that  I  saw  and  enjoyed  while 
there  :  but  yet  I  am  not  suitably  affected  under  a  sense  of 
his  great  goodness  tov.ards  me.  O  how  can  I  ever  get  so 
cold  as  I  do  1  O  my  Jesus, keep  me  awake  ajid  near  to  thy- 
self: let  me  never  go  a  whoring  ..fter  other  lovers.  I  went 
to  Cornwallis,  and  when  I  came  there  the  work  of  God  was 
reviving  again  ;  the  chrissliuns  seemed  alarmed,  some  sin- 
ners awakened,  and  crying  out  after  a  Saviour,  and  some 
that  had  been  awakened  and  gone  back  were  again  £;larm- 

=jed  ;  and  there  appeared  a  prospect  of  a  revival.  6  the  good- 
ness of  God  to  me  a  worm  !  what  shall  I  render  to  him  for 
all  his  benefits      Wherever  I  go  I  find  him  kind  to  me  :  but 


\ 


I    ■ 


1 1 


'I 


I  I 


l! 


^ 


I 


64 


IIEV.   HEXRY   ALLINt  5 


when  I  talk  of  returnln;j;  to  God,  I  am  left  with  astonish' 
ment  of  joy,  tluit  he  h:\s  declared,  he  w  ill  have  mercy  and 
not  sacrifice.  I  iicver  have,  nor  never  can  make  the  least 
return  ;  yet  )iis  mercy  is  as  free  as  ever,  and  he  delights  t(i 
do  f^ood.  C)  that  I  could  be  hiniiblc  at  his  feet,  feel  my 
nrAhinj^neFs  and  acknowledge  his  goodness.  But  O  the  re- 
mains of  pride  and  unbeli<;f:  O  how  they  hang  upon  mef 
and  bar  me  often  fioni  a  sense  of  his  love.  Sometimes  1 
have  my  foes  beneath  my  feet,  and  then  how  soon  there  a- 
1  iscs  a  host  aj^ainst  me,  and  I  am  wandering  in  captivity  ; 
yet,  blessed  be  God,  they  cannot  keep  mre  long  ;  my  Jesu» 
gives  me  the  vu  tory  again. 

July  the  3d^  I  went  to  Horton  where  I  preached  and 
fnjoyed  some  happy  hours :  Biit  O  my  ungrateful  heart, 
that  it  is  not  more  uHected  under  a  sense  of  God's  good- 
ness !  Trom  Ilorton  I  wont  to  valmouth,  where  I  found 
many  of  the  christians  much  indulg»'d  with  great  discover- 
ies of  divine  truths,  and  m.anifestaticns  of  God's  love  to  their 
i^ouis.  One  of  my  brothers-in-law  (likewise  a  brother  in 
Christ)  began  to  speak  in  public,  that  had  not  done  it  before  j 
and  many  of  the  christians  v.ere  so  lively,  that  religion  was 
I  almost  all  their  theme  ;  and  some  sinners  under  conviction 
still  inquiring  the  v/ay  to  and  after  salvation.  But  O  how  dan- 
gerous is  the  case  of  those,  who  have  been  awakened,  and 
tasted  the  word  of  God,  and  the  powers  of  the  world,  to  come 
l?v  conviction,  and  ure  turned  back  aeain  to  their  vanities,  as 

js  often  the  Cftse.  O  the  uhspeakabie  danger,  and  the  de- 
plorable condition  of  enlightened  apostates. 

August  15th,  I  returned  to  CornwalUs.  Many  of  my 
friends  came  to  see  me  ;  some  of  them  were  strong  in  the 
fuith,  and  some  in  doubts  and  darkness,  mourning  the  absence 
of  God.  O  the  unhappy  hours  christians  pass  through, when 
in  the  dark  ;  far  more  unhappiness  than  the  unconverted  : 
for  they  have  some  carnal  sweetness  in  the  things  of  time 
and  sense, but  tl]jg  christians  find  those  pleasures  to  be  wholly 
spoiled  to  them,  and  when  they  are  not  enjoying  God,  they 
enjoy  nothing  :  but  yet  they  would  not  change  with  uncon- 
verted and  all  their  carnal  pleasures  fortenthousardthousuad 
worlds.  The  hypocrites  may  find  some  rest  in  their  false  con- 
fidence and  apprehension  of  future  happiness,  and  the  Pharisee 
and  dry  moralists  can  many  times  lean  contentedly  on  their 
dry  forms  and  outward  performances  of  religion  ;  hut  tho 
christians,  who  have  known  and  eaten  of  the  heavenly  food 


i 


astcnUh- 
KTcy  unci 

the  least 
ulic^hts  t(i 
t,  feel  my 
O  the  rc- 
apon  mfc> 
lelimcs  I 
II  there  a- 
captivity  ; 

my  Jcsu* 

ached  aiul 
elul  heart, 
Dcl's  good- 
:re  1  found 
it  discover- 
ove  to  their 

brother  in 
e  it  Ijefore ; 
eligion  \yas 
X  conviction 
O  how  dan- 
Ikened,  and 
li  Id  to  come 

vamticsp  as 

land  the  de- 

Fany  of  my 
Ironc;  in  the 
[the  absence 
lovigh,when 
Iconverted : 
igs  of  time 
,  be  wholl  y 
God,  they 
irith  uncon- 
fdthousdiad 
Ir  false  con- 
lie  Pharisee 
\\y  on  their 
|n  ;  hut  thvO 
ivenly  foo4 


;* 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


^5 


from  the  blessed  Redeemer,  C'\n  neither  rest  on  their  exter- 
nal perrorriiwiiH.cs,  on  tiieir  past  experiences^  nor  on  their 
expectations  of  future  happiness;  for  they  are  thirsting  af- 
ter the  present  ssveet  eiijoynient  of  (iod  and  the  manifesta- 
tion of  his  love  :  and  will  often  sav,  in  times  of  darkness, 
with  David,  My  days  are  consumed  like  smoke,  my  loins 
are  burned  as  an  hearth,  my  heart  is  smitten  and  withered 
like  grass,  so  that  I  forget  to  cat  my  bread  ;    I  am  like  a  pe- 

.  iican  of  the  wilderness,  or  an  owl  of  the  desert:  /  watch 
and  am  as  a  sparrow  alone  upf)n  the  houso  top.  And  say 
with  Job,  O  liiat  1  knev.'  where  to  find  him,  that  I  might 
come  even  to  his  seat  ;  I  would  order  my  cause  before  him 
and  till  my  mouth  with  arguments.     Well  they 'have  this 

.,to  comfort  tliem  ;  He  that  loves  them,  will  love  them  to  the 
!>cn(\  ;  and  although  he  hides  his  face  for  a  little  moment,  yet 
with  everlasting  goodness  will  he  visit  them. 

'  Lei  those  that  mourn  his  absence  wait;  *'"' 

A  For  God  beholds  tlieir  mourning  i>tate, 

I  And  will  return  again. 

His  arms  of  liwe  shall  wipe  their  tears 
, ,  And  banisii  all  their  doubts  and  fearsy 

And  .ill  their  foes  be  slain.  ,      - 

i  I  RKMAi>fKD  in  Cornwallis,  preached  in  different  parts 
6i  the  town,  and  conversed  with  those  imder  distress  until 
the  23d  of  August,  and  tlien  set  out  again  for  Annapolis.. 
Blessed  be  God  for  wliat  I  enjoyed  of  his  presence  on  the 
Way.  ()  it  is  blessed  riding  from  place  to  place  when  I 
find  God  is  with  me.  When  I  came  to  Wilmot  I  found 
the  Lord  still  striving  with  his  people,  and  found  some  of 
his  children  appeared  bold  in  his  cause.  As  I  was  sitting 
line  day  in  the  door  of  a  house,  when  it  thundered  and 
Mghtened,  a  dry  trunk  of  a  tree,  and  a  large  elm  were 
•truck  by  a  flash  of  lightning  before  the  door. 

O  the  great  goodness  of  my  Maker  God, 
,  To  send  the  flaming  sheets  of  fire  abroad  ; 

Make  rugged  elms,  and  stately  trunks  endure  ^ 

The  blazing  shock  while  I  am  held  secure. 
Mark  how  the  bellowing  thunder  roars  around,      ^,     « 
Makes  pillars  bend,  and  shakes  the  solid  ground  t 
While  I  with  wonder  safely  stand  and  see 
The  flanrnng  scene,  guarded  from  injury, 
O  Jesus,  Jesus,  let  rae  love  thy  name,  —       * 

.  And  cheerful  sound  thine  everlasting  fame. 

F  2 


■^s 


\ 


(i; 


j  »!  ^1 


REV.  HENRY  ALI.INt'b 


I  WENT  down  tq  Annapolis,  where  I  preached  ofteir^ 
had  great  trials  of  mmd,  and  some  happy  hours.  About 
the  first  of  September  1  was  taken  with  a  very  sore  throat 
occasioned  by  a  swelling,  which  continued  some  days  ;  so 
that  I  could  swallow  nothing  but  a  few  spoonfuls  of  liciuids- 
for  my  support,  but  was  enabled  to  speak  in  public  when  at 
the  worst,  to  my  own  astonishment,  and  the  astonishment 
of  others  also.  But  O  the  goodness  of  God.  In  about  six 
days  it  begun  to  abate,  and  went  wholly  away  in  a  few  days^ 
after.  I  continued  riding  and  preaching  almost  all  the 
time,  and  the  Lord's  work  prospered  under  my  hands  A- 
bout  this  time  I  was  threatened  to  be  abused  by  a  number  of 
ruffians,  but  they  were  not  permitted  to  do  it.  O  may  they 
see  and  consider,  before  it  is  too  late  ;  that  their  souls 
might  be  saved  in  the  day  of  Christ's  appearing.  And  O 
that  I  might  always  have  a  heart  filled  with  love  so  far  as 
to  pity  them  and  pray  for  them. 

After  I  had  seen,  preached  to,  and  conversed  witli 
all  the  societies  in  the  county,  I  returned  to  Cornwallis.  O 
what  returns  shall  I  make  or  what  shall  I  say,  of  the  in- 
finite goodness  of  God  ;  or  what  shall  I  do  with  this  un- 
grateful heart  of  mine,  that  is  no  more  affected  under  sucii 
expressions  of  God's  love,  and  care  to  and  of  me.  Nothing 
was  scarcely  talked  of  now  among  numbers  where  I  preach- 
ed but  religion.  Wherever  tliey  met,  their  langu^tge  was 
the  language  of  Zion,  and  telling  what  they  had  enjoyed. 
I  then  rode  to  liorton  where  I  saw  the  work  of  God  among 
his  children.  The  day  following  I  rode  with  9  or  10  to 
Falmouth  to  meet  the  christians  there,  and  to  commune 
with  them  ;  and  thus  the  Lord  increased  the  numbers  and 
boldness  of  his  children.  The  christians  at  Falmouth  seem- 
ed at  first  to  be  but  weak,  and  few  in  number,  but  were  now 
increased  in  gifts,  graces  and  numbers.  O  the  happy  day? 
that  we  enjoyed,  while  anti-christ  was  raging  all  around  us, 
and  said  that  we  were  all  under  a  delusion  The  Lord  in- 
crease such  a  delusion  over  the  whole  earth  amonp-  all  the  in 
habitants  of  it.  On  the  Sabbath  I  preached  two  sermons, 
and  it  was  a  day  of  God's  power  among  the  christians  pres- 
ent, and  some  sinners  were  pressing  into  tlie  kingdom  ol 
God.  Yea,  it  seemed  as  if  they  were  determined  to  take 
the  kingdom  by  violence,  O  Jesus,  help  them  and  carry  on 
thy  blessed  work* 


^ 


\ 


4 


cached  ofieir^ 
)urs.  About 
y  sore  throat 
nic  days  ;  so 
fuls  of  licjuids- 
ublic  when  at 
astonishment 

In  about  six 

in  a  few  days 

hnost  all  the 

ly  hands      A- 

)y  a  number  of 

O  may  they 

at  their  souls 

"in  15.     And  O 

love  so  far  as 

on  versed  witii 

ornwallis.    O 

ay,  of  the  in- 

with  this  uu- 

:ed  under  such 

me.    Nothing 

here  I  preach- 

langurige  was 

had  enjoyed. 

of  God  among 

:h  9   or   10  to 

to  commune 

e  numbers  and 

almouth  seem- 

•,  but  were  now 

the  happy  days 

;  all  around  us, 

The  Lord  in- 

Tionfr  all  the  in 

I  two  sermons, 

christians  pres- 

^e  kingdom  ot 

rmined  to  take 

m  and  carry  on 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL 


6r 


I  REMAINED  somc  time  in  Falmouth,  then  went  to 
Horton  and  Cornwallis  where  I  preached  often,  and  saw  thr; 
goings  of  God  in  his  sanctuary.  The  opposers  were  much  ■• 
engaged  in  reproachmg  the  cause  of  Christ.  One  evening 
being  desired  to  preach  at  a  man's  house,  who  would  some- 
times get  drunk,  a  number  of  enemies  contrived  to  get 
him  drunk,  and  send  him  home  drumming-  (as  he  was  a 
drummer)  to  disturb  the  meeting  :  but  God  frustrated  their 
evil  design.  The  man  being  out  at  work  in  the  woods,  was 
expected  to  go  home  about  dark  by  a  tavern,  which  was 
between  him  and  his  house,  and  tlie  way  he  commonly  went 
home  from  his  work  ;  but  directed  by  Providence;  he  went 
home  by  quite  a  different  way  ;  though  he  knew  nothinc; 
of  their  design,  as  he  told  me  afterwards,  and  suid  if  he  had 
gone  the  other  way  he  might  been  overcome  by  liquor,  as 
he  was  given  to  it,  and  have  done  what  they  desired,  if  Be- 
ing requested,  I  attended  now  a  meeting  of  somc  of  the  bap- 
tists in  Horton,  to  advise  about  gathering  a  church  there. 

0  may  the  time  come  when  Ephraim  shall  no  more  vex 
Judah,  nor  Judah  envy  Ephraim,  and  that  there  might  nev- 
er more  be  any  disputes  about  such  non -essentials,  as  water 
baptism  ;  the  sprinkling  of  infants,  or  baptising  of  adults  by 
immersion  ;  but  every  -one  enjoy  liberty  of  conscience. 
They  gathered  in  church  order,  and  made  choice  of  one 
N.  Person,  (who  was  not  endowed  with  a  great  gift  in  the 
word)  for  their  elder  ;  intending  to  put  him  forward,  until 
God  gave  them  some  better  one,  or  brought  him  out  more 
in  the  liberty  of  the  gospel  ;  after  which  he  "vvas  ordained^^ 

1  then  went  to  Cornwallis  and  preached  there  for  a  season. 
Blessed  be  God,  I  had  great  liberty  in  inviting  precious  and 
immortal  souls  to  the  glorious  gospel,  and  found  my  de- 
sires were  strengthened,  to  spitad  my  Master's  name  ;  yea 
I  was  never  more  happy,  than  when  I  was  preaching  the 
gospel,  and  found  my  soul  engaged  ;  and  thought  I  could 
travel  over  the  whole  world  to  proclaim  that  Jesus  reigned, 

I  REMAINED  iu  Comwiilhs  until  the  1 7th  of  Novem- 
ber, and  then  v.ent  to  Horton,  preached  there  ;  and  from 
thence  to  Falmou'h  ;  was  still  blest  with  a  great  sense  of 
the  worth  of  souls  and  the  sweetness  of  redeeming  love, 
and  longing  to  be  instrumental  in  bringing  many  poor  per- 
ishing souls  to  share  with  me  in  that  love.  December  the 
12th,  I  went  to  Newport,  had  some  happy  hours  in  my  own 
•oul,  and  fouint  some  siniRrs  under  conviction,  but  none  of 


68 


REV.  iienut  alline's 


:|ll 


I 
Si! 


'•J 


W'  HI' 


I 


.N 


\'\ 


ill;  ■' 
Hi  I 


U     :1 


It 


;'    •! 


.^ 


tliem  brought  out  since  I  was  last  there.  O  the  danger  of 
lingering  on  tlic  plains,  as  souls  too  often  do  under  convic- 
tion, and  many  have  been  left  there  forever.  O  that  sin- 
gers might  be  av^'akened  by  the  Spirit  of  God,  and  that  they 
would  let  all  go  for  Christ's  sake. 

I  RETi'uNED  to  Falmouth  and  remained  there  until 
the  Sth  of  January,  1779,  and  then  went  to  Cornwaiiis, 
where  I  Ibund  the  Kedeenier's  Blessed  Kingdom  still  re- 
viving. The  '2'.ld  day  of  said  uionth  I  met  the  Congrega- 
tional Church  to  consult  about  methods  for  my  ordination, 
tiiat  1  miglit  be  more  useful.  I  told  them,  if  I  might  in 
any  degree  be  more  uselul  by  the  imposition  of  hands,  than 
what  I  was  now,  1  would  rejoice^  The  church  proposed 
to  consult  with  the  otl.er  churches  in  fellowship,  to  which 
all  agreed,  that  if  they  would  assist,  as  I  doubted  not  but 
they  would,  1  should  be  \^•iIling  to  receive  the  imposition  of 
hands,  altl'.ough  I  never  expected  vo  be  settled  In  any  place  ; 
for  I  would  ralher  stand  wholly  alone  in  the  world,  than  to 
go  contrary  to  the  gospel,  or  join  in  affinity  with  those 
churches  that  held  the  form  of  godliness  without  the  pow- 
er. I  likewise  told  them,  it  might  be  for  our  encourage- 
ment ;  that  althougli  we  first  gathered  a  few  in  number,  and 
Lvontended  for  the  puv/er  and  liberty  of  the  gospel,  with  the 
powers  of  darkness  ;  yet  the  hand  of  the  Lord  had  been 
with  us,  and  watered  us  with  the  spirit  of  love,  increasing 
our  numbers  and  graces,  and  I  trusted,  he  still  would,  if  we 
went  according  to  the  gospel.  Some  of  the  christians 
seemed  afraid  to  come  out  against  a  frowning  world  and 
the  will  of  many  christians.  I  told  them  it  was  very  evi- 
dent, that  they  never  had  stood  up  for  that  which  we  be- 
lieved to  be  the  v/ork  of  God,  which  our  souls  and  many 
others  had  rejoiced  in,  and  therefore  how  could  we  think 
them  to  be  the  ministers  of  Christ.  I  entreated  them  to 
stand  fast  in  the  liberty  whereunto  Chi  ist  had  made  them 
free  ;  and  by  no  means  join  with  the  church  of  anti-christ ; 
and  for  my  own  part  I  utterly  refused  any  assistance  in  my 
ordination  from  any  of  them,  that  1  did  not  believe  were  in 
the  cause  of  Christ,  and  I  believed  that  God  would  stand 
by  me  and  bless  me  if  I  followed  him  in  the  gospel. 

The  23d  of  January  I  set  out  again  for  Annapolis  ; 
being  very  cold,  I  rode  very  fast  and  was  something  worri- 
ed. O  the  goodness  of  God  to  me,  in  keeping  me  from 
any  accident,  and  my  nature  from  being  overcome  by  the 


y 


LIFK   AN*D  JOURNAL. 


65 


5  danger  of 
icier  convic- 

0  that  sin- 
id  that  they 

there  until 
Coinwallis, 
m  still  re- 
Congrega- 
ordinirtion, 

might  in 
lands,  than 

pi'GpvOsed 
y  to  which 
;d  not  but 
position  of 
iiiy  place ; 
d?  than  to 
^'ith   those  •, 
the  pow- 
ncourage- 
mber,  and 

with  the 
lad  been 
ncreasing- 
uld,  if  we 
:hristians 
'orld  and 

ery  evi- 

1  we  be- 
^d  many 
ve  think 
them  to 
de  them 
i-christ ;  ♦ 
3e  in  my 

^ve^e  in 
d  stand 

lapolis  ; 
;  worri- 
e  from 
by  the 


,# 


Severity  of  the  weather,  and  in  blessing  mc  with  his  pres- 
ence. O  the  unbounded  goodness  of  (iod  to  his  creatures  ; 
ten  thousands  of  praises  belong  to  his  name.  O  may  I 
forever  bear  my  part  with  all  the  followers  of  the  Lamb,  hi 
the  lofty  strains  above,  where  I  shdl  see  my  Jesus  face  to 
face.  O  my  God,  give  me  this  for  my  everlasting  portion  ; 
let  me  be  thine,  and  thou  be  mine  iur  ever.  I  remained  in 
Wilniot  about  eight  days,  and  then  went  down  to  Granville 
and  Annapolis  My  friends  were  rejoiced  to  hear  the 
gospel ;  but  there  were  none  brought  out  of  late  to  the 
knowledge  of  Christ.  O  tlmt  the  Redeemer's  kingdon* 
might  nourish  and  spread  from  pole  to  pole,  and  bring 
thousands  and  tens  of  thousands  to  embrace  redeeming 
love  and  praise  his  name.  When  I  went  down  the  river 
I  found  some  much  engaged  after  Christ.  Every  evening, 
almost  every  wb.ere,  where  I  put  up,  the  room  was  full  to 
hear  discourses  and  exhortations.  I  was  now  sent  for  by 
one  Mr.  F.  a  minister  of  the  church  of  England,  to  see 
him  :  and  was  enabled  (when  he  discovered  his  Arian  prin- 
ciples) before  all  the  society  to  hold  out  the  truth  of  the 
gospel,  warning  him  of  his  danger,  and  charged  him  to  for- 
bear destroying  souls. 

February.  I  returned  to  Wilmot,  preached  indif- 
ferent places,  and  the  word  seemed  to  have  effect.  I  thca 
set  out  for  Cornwallis  with  some  christians,  that  came  for 
me  from  thence^  where  I  returned  in  peace  and  safety  on 
the  58th  of  February.  O  how  many  stonKis  wet  and  dry, 
with  foes  without  and  foes  within,  have  I  been  through,  and , 
the  Lord  stood  by  me,  and  carried  me  through  them  all ; 
neither  have  1  lacked  any  thing.  1  found  there  three  or 
four,  which  I  had  reason  to  hope,  were  born  to  Christ  since 
I  went  fro7n  thence,  now  rejoicing  in  the  God  of  their  sal- 
vation, and  si'nging  praises  to  the  King  of  Glory  :  and  ma- 
ny others  bowed  down  under  a  great  sense  of  their  lost  and 
\mdone  condition.  O  that  God  would  carry  on  yet  a  bless- 
ed work,  and  bring  many  precious  and  immortal  souls  to 
shout  forth  the  Redeemer's  praises.  I  remained  a  while 
in  Cornwallis,  preached  as  often  as  my  bodily  strength 
would  admit ;  and  then  went  to  Falmouth  where  I  met  the 
church  to  conclude  about  my  ordination.  I  found  there  al- 
so one  woman  brought  out  of  the  horrible  pit  nnd  miry 
clay,  and  her  feet  set  upon  the  rock  of  Christ,  with  a  new 
song  ill  her  mouth,  even  praises  to  the  God  of  her  saWa- 


"hiiK 


'0 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


ll'!-' 


:     li 


t      l;lf 


tion.  I  then  went  to  Ilorton,  wliere  the  work  of  God  was 
reviving  ;  so  that  I  remained  there  five  days,  preaching- 
every  day,  and  the  house  of  worship  was  throni^ed  with 
hearers.  Four  or  five  were  brought  out  by  the  Redeemer 
from  great  distress,  rejoicing  in  the  glorious  way  of  hfe, 
and  tellhig  what  God  liad  done  for  their  souls.  I  went  a- 
gaiu  to  Cornwallis  to  inform  them  of  some  of  the  proceed- 
ings of  the  church,  and  returned  to  Falmouth  and  Newport, 
and  appointed  a  time  of  meeting  for  a  general  council  to 
,    proceed  to  ordination.  ^ 

Vs  April  3th.     We  met  from  the  three  churches.   One 

of  Horton,  one  of  Cornwallis,  the  other  of  Newport,  and 
Falmouth  met ;  held  a  day  of  fasting  and  prayer,  and  con- 
cluded to  proceed  the  next  day.  April  6th,  met  in  a  large 
barn  to  proceed  to  ordination  ;  and  after  prayer  and  sing- 
ing, and  a  sermon  preached,  I  received  the  imposition  of 
hands  by  nine  delegates,  three  chosen  out  of  each  church  : 
after,  we  sung  and  prayed.  Then  they  gave  me  my  cre- 
dentials signed  by  the  delegates. 1 1  went  then  to  Newport, 
preached  there,  and  returned  as  soon  as  possible.  1  went 
to  Cornwallis,  where  1  found  a  vessel,  that  was  going  to 
the  river  St.  Jolm's,  where  I  had  been  expecting  to  go, 
and  waited  only  for  God  to  open  a  door,  firmly  believing,, 
that  he  would  not  only  send  me  there,  but  likewise  bless 
my  labours  there  ;  and  my  soul  longed  to  go  in  the  name 
of  Jesus.  I  spent  some  time  in  Cornwallis  visiting  my 
friends,  especially  those  under  conviction,  who  seemed  loth 
that  I  should  leave  the  place,  as  they  are  too  apt  to  lean  on 
means,  and  often  bar  a  blessing  from  their  souls.  I  en- 
deavoured to  make  them  shake  it  off,  and  to  shew  them  the 
necessity  of  going  immediately  to  Christ,  and  lean  altogether 
on  him.  I  preached  often  and  saw  the  work  of  the  blessed 
/  Kedeemer  thriving.  We  spent  hours  in  praying  and  sing- 
ing together,  and  then  parted.  All  the  christians  seemed 
to  have  a  spirit  of  prayer  for  my  success.  I  bid  them 
farewell  and  sailed  from  Cornwallis  the  25th  day  of  April. 
In  about  three  days  we  got  up  the  river  St.  John's. 
The  people  heard  that  I  was  come,  and  came  on  board  to 
fetch  me  ashore.  The  next  day  a  number  of  the  church 
met  i  they  related  to  me  their  broken  state,  and  the  dark- 
ness of  the  times.  I  laboured  as  much  as  possible,  and 
soon  got  information  of  the  state  of  religion  and  the  senti- 
ments of  the  people.     I  found  there  v/as  a  number  of  sin* 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


DfGod  was 
5  preaching- 
ongecl  witli 

Redeemer 
r-av   of  life, 

I  Avent  a- 
be  proceed- 
id  Newport, 

council  to 

t'ches.  One 
;wport,  and 
ir,  and  con- 
t  in  a  large 
if  and  sing- 
iposition  of 
ch  church  : 
ne  my  cre- 
o  Newport, 
e,  1  went 
s  going  to 
;ting  to  go, 

believing,, 
ewise  bless 

the  name 
isiting  my 
eemed  loth 
:  to  lean  on 
uls.  I  en- 
w  them  the 

altogether 
the  blessed 
5  and  sing- 
is   seemed 

bid  them 
y  of  April. 
St.  John's. 
n  board  to 
he  church 

the  dark- 
ssible,  and 

the  senti' 
)er  of  sin* 


71 


cere  christians,  but  very  much  under  trials  and  discourrior- 
mcnts,  and  reproached  by  those  who  held  the  form  wltliout 
the  power  of  rehgion.  When  the  Sabbath  cair^e  I  prcach- 
[0'  ed  and  the  Lord  was  there,  and  took  much  hold  of  the  peo-  . 
pie.  The  week  ensuing  I  preached  t\ro  lectures,  and  went 
from  place  to  place,  visiting  the  people,  and  incjuiring  into 
their  standing.  O  it  was  a  grief  to  see  sincere  christians 
thus  scattered  up  and  down  the  moimtains  like  slieep  hav- 
ing no  shepherd ;  and  the  accuser  of  the  bretheren  had 
sown  much  discord  among  the  christians.  There  had  been 
a  church  there,  but  had  separated  on  account  of  the  great- 
est part  holding  the  minister  to  be  an  unconverted  man, 
who  afterwards  went  away,  but  the  division  still  subsisted. 
I  went  still  from  place  to  place  preaching  often  and  visidng 
the  people  ;  and  God  of  his  infinite  mercy  began  a  work  of 
grace.  Some  christians  much  revived  shouted  forth  the 
Redeemer's  praise,  and  some  sinners  were  brought  under 
conviction.  I  spent  as  much  time  as  I  could,  with  all  the 
members  of  the  visible  church,  tryinpj  to  get  them  together, 
but  all  was  in  vain.  Indeed,  I  fear  tlie  greatest  reason  was, 
some  of  them  did  not  love  the  power  of  religion.  It  wovUd 
not  have  been  of  any  servxe  to  have  joined  them,  unless  • 
tlieir  hearts  were  changed  ;  but  yet  being  members  of  the 
visible  church,  they  did  not  see  fit  to  exclude  them  from 
walking  with  them,  if  they  had  desired  it.  I  then  advised 
them,  as  many  as  could,  to  fenew  the  covenant,  and  to 
come  again  into  chirrch  order  ;  that  when  any  minister  of 
Christ  should  come  amongst  them,  they  might  enjoy  all 
the  privileges  of  the  gospel.  Many  of  them  seemed  well 
satisfied  with  the  proposal,  fell  in  with  the  advice,  and  renew- 
ed the  covenant.  The  greatest  part  of  the  old  church,  and.  , 
(others  likewise  that  had  not  joined,  joined  now  ;  and  the  work 
of  the  blessed  God  increased.and  there  appeared  much  love 
among  them.  O  that  God  may  increase  our  love  and  hu- 
mility. The  church,  that  was  now  united  again,  sent  re- 
peated requests  to  those  that  had  not  joined,  to  come  and 
join  them,  and  at  the  same  time,  if  they  could  not,  they 
were  willing  they  should  enjoy  liberty  of  conscience  ;  but 
some  still  refused.  I  was  so  engaged  in  preaching  and  dis- 
coursing with  the  people,  that  for  some  time  I  could  scarcely 
get  time  to  put  pen  to  paper  ;  no,  wot  for  4  or  5  days  to- 
gether. I  passed  through  many  distressing  trials  in  my 
,     own  mind,  but  the  Lord  would  not  leave  me  long  without 


I    i  111 ';! 


72 


>, 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINL'S 


£  !i! 


Hi 


reticf;  and  I  enjoyed  also  many  joyful  and  happy  hours. 
O  the  goodness  of  God  to  such  a  wretch.  1  m  as  once,  be- 
ing under  great  distress  and  trials  in  my  own  mind,  re- 
markably relieved  by  the  following  words,  lie  knoweth 
the  way  that  I  take,  and  w  hen  he  hath  tried  me,  I  shall 
come  forth  as  gold.  O  the  g'^odness  of  Ciod  to  me  a 
worm  of  the  dust  I     Lord  help  me  to  love  thee  with  all 

my  soul.  ...    ' 

Well,  the  blessed  hour  rolls  dn  with  speed, 

When  I  from  darkness  shall  be  freed  ; 
And  sin  no  more  control  : 

From  storms  1  trust  to  take  my  flight  ]  > 

Up  to  the  realms  of  endless  light ; 
And  love  inspire  my  soul. 
The  work  of  God  was  still  increasing  ;  souls  crynig  out 
what  they  shall  do  to  be  saved,  and  christians  enjoying  great 
discoveries  of  divine  truths.  But  O  1  found  many,  who  in 
my  judgment  were  unhappily  deceived.  O  how  broad  is 
the  way  to  hell.  Some  careless  and  secure,  some  building 
their  hopes  on  the  sand.  O  how  di  jadful  is  it  for  a  man 
to  go  to  the  grave  with  full  expectations  of  heaven,  and  to 
awake  in  hell.  How  shall  we  know^  a  true  from  a  false 
confidence  ?  Why  it  may  be  observed  that  those  who  have 
a  false  confidence  are  confident  of  heaven  and  happiness 
liereafter  ;  but  those  that  have  a  true  confidence  are  thirst- 
ing after  heaven  and  the  enjoyment  of  God  while  here. 
Again  those  with  a  false  confidence  complain  mostly  of 
outward  trials  and  crosses  :  but  those  with  the  gospel  turn 
of  confidence  complain  mostly  of  the  trials  and  crosses 
which  they  experience  within.  Again,  those  with  a  false 
confidence  will  tell  of  what  they  expect  God  will  do  for 
them  hereatter :  but  those  of  the  c;ospel  turn  will  tell  what 
God  does  for  them  in  theiv  souls  now.  And  for  the  reason 
of  the  false  confidence,  the  souls  of  such  are  imprisoned 
and  see  not  their  own  disorder  :  and  as  for  their  joys,  their 
animal  spirits  may  be  elevated  with  a  prospect  ot  happi- 
ness, when  the  inmost  soul  is  never  touched  nor  redeemed  ; 
and  their  light  being  darkness,  they  neither  see  their  dan- 
ger, nor  the  importance,  nor  the  difference.  But  the  true 
christian's  turn  is  such,  that  they  having  the  Spirit  of  God, 
can  discern  their  own  vileness,  and  ten  thousand  dangers, 
•which  the  others  cannot  see.  He  that  has  the  turn,  that 
is  after  God's  own  heart,  is  also  humble,  and  longs  greatly 
to  be  free  from  sin,  yea,  from  all  sin  wliatever,  and  to  be 


l.lfE   AND  J0URN>\1,. 


n 


\ppy  hours, 
as  once,  be- 
1  mind,  le- 
le  knoweth 
me,  I  shall 
od  to  me  a 
lee  with  all 


is  crying  out 

joying  groat 

any,  who  in 

ow  broad  is 

ime  building 

t  for  a  man 

Lven,  and  to 

rom  a  false 

e  who  have 

happiness 

are  thirst- 

hile  here. 

mostly  of 

ospel  turn 

nd  crosses 

ith  a  false 

will  do  for 

11  tell  what 

the  reason 

mprisoned 

joys,  their 

ot  happi- 

edeemcci ; 

their  dan- 

ut  the  true 

it  of  God, 

1  dangers, 

turn,  that 

igs  greatly 

and  to  be 


rr.arle  perfectly  holy  :  while  those  of  the  other  turn  do  not 

wholly  hate  sin.    C)  happy,  hap^jy  souls,  whose  treasure  is 

above  ;  their  love  and  holiness  centre  there,  constrained  by 

^'       the  ties  of  love. 

Soon  they  shall  safely  reach  '.he  happy  shore, 

Where  doubts  and  storms  and  death  are  known  no  more. 

/,  The  last  Sabbath  1  preached  at  St.  John's  river  ;  the 

people  seemed  so  loth  to  go  away,  that  we  stopped  at  the 
meeting-house  door,  and  sung  and  discoursed  some  time, 
and  then  I  left  them  to  go  down  the  river.  O  how  many 
souls  may  be  hurled  off  from  this  mortal  stage,  before  I  re- 
turn there  again.  The  next  day  I  went  down  the  river 
about  ten  miles,  and  preached  a  lecture,  took  my  leave  of 
them,  and  the  day  following  proceeded  farther  down  the 
river,  encamped  one  night  in  the  woods  ;  but  as  1  hadchris- 
tians  who  carried  me  down  the  river,  we  had  some  happy 
moments  there,  and  likewise  in  the  boat.  The  next  day 
I  went  to  Mahogany,  and  preached  there  on  Saturday ;  and 
Sabbath-day  morning  a  boat  came  for  me  to  go  to  the  town 
and  preach  there,  which  I  did,  and  although  it  was  a  dark 
j)lace  and  the  King's  garrison  ;  yet  I  must  acknowledge 
there  appeared  some  movings  of  the  spirit  among  them  ; 
,  ep>p-ciaily  among  some  of  the  soldiers.  But  O  the 
darkness  of  the  place.  The  greatest  part  of  the  people 
f  ouducted  as  if  they  were  to  die  like  beasts.  I  suppose 
there  were  upwards  of  200  people  there  come  to  the  years 
of  maturity,  audi  saw  no  signs  of  any  christian  excepting 
one  soldier.  Yet  although  I  was  among  such  an  irre- 
ligious people,  the  Lord  was  kind  to  me,  and  I  lacked  for 
nothir.g  while  I  was  there. 

An  opportunity  soon  presented  to  cross  the  bay  to 
Annapolis.  When  I  came  there,  I  found  the  work  of  God 
in  some  degree  reviving  :  some  in  distress  and  in  some 
sense  of  their  danger.  I  was  there  brought  to  the  knowl- 
edge of  a  Saviour  afresh.  But  among  all  the  reproaches, 
that  I  had  before  been  through,  I  was  never  so  wounded  as 
now.  A  young  man,  who  had  been  awakened  under  my 
preaching,  (being  tuined  back  from  good  beginning)  de- 
clared  that  he  saw  me  in  bed  with  a  young  woman  ;  and 
that  I  never  should  be  seen  in  those  parts  again.  Many ' 
of  my  friends  began  to  believe  it,  and  now  looked  on  me 
with  coldness.     I  endeavoured  to  bear  it,  and  the  burden  of 

G 


X 


li^i 


I 


11 


it 
r 


t 


I 


li 


II  '-^  I 


i:  '11 


v;i< 


I 


74 


REV.  HENRY  ALLIN'E'§ 


h,  and  took  no  steps  to  prove  my  innocence,  Lut  only  deni- 
ed the  fact ;  leaving  it  with  God,  to  order  the  event,  telling 
those  who  advised  me  to  take  the  law,  that  1  would  leave  it 
to  my  Lord  and  Master  to  clear  my  character,  and  \'ndi- 
cate  the  honour  of  his  cause ;  which  he  did  in  a  short 
time,  although  the  report  had  spread  much.  The  young 
man  was  struck  with  such  guilt  in  his  own  conscience,  that 
he  could  not  refrain  the  acknowledgement  of  it.  He  came 
out  and  declared  publicly  that  he  had  told  a  lie  ;  that  he 
had  been  imposed  upon  by  the  devil  and  his  own  malicious 
nature  :  and  he  appeared  as  great  a  penitent  as  almost  ev- 
er I  saw ;  and  he  told  me,  that  if  it  would  be  of  any  ser- 
vice, he  would  give  his  life  to  heal  the  wound,  which  he 
had  given  to  the  cause  of  Christ,  and  seemed  as  if  he  could 
never  forgive  himself  ;  and  in  a  short  time  he  was  brought 
to  the  knowledge  of  Christ ;  and  came  out,  I  trust,  a  sin- 
cere christian  to  the  satisfaction  of  all  the  society.  And 
en  the  whole,  this  report  proved  the  removal  of  others 
which  had  been  against  me  :  for  none  could  be  more  ix)si- 
tively  affirmed  than  this  was,  and  this  proved  to  be  wholly 
made.  And  thus  I  have  learned  to  pay  no  regard  to  false 
reports.  I  remained  preaching  in  the  plaee,  and  the  peo- 
ple thronged  to  hear  the  gospel ;  some  travailing  in  the 
pangs  of  the  new  birth  ;  cutting  pangs^  unknow  n  to  all  but 
those  who  have  experienced  them,  and  a  wounded  spirit 
who  can  bear.  Many  and  many  a  night  I  have  sat  up  until 
twelve,  one,  two  and  three  o'clock,  labouring  with  distres- 
sed souls.  But  it  is  God  alone  that  can  heal,  though  he 
often  does  it  by  the  use  of  means  ;  and  many  bar  a  blessing 
.from  their  souls  by  leaning  on  the  minister;  and  many 
more  by  a  prejudice  against  them.  Two  christians  came 
ft'om  Cornwallis  to  Annapolis  hearing  that  I  was  there  ; 
with  them  I  returned  to  Cornwallis,  and  enjoyed  happy 
hours  in  our  journey. 

July.  I  found  my  friends  well,  rejoicing  at  my  re- 
turn, and  relating  what  God  had  done  for  them  while  I  was 
gone.  Some  souls  were  added  to  the  faithful.  O  dear  Je- 
sus, what  ails  my  heart,  that  I  have  no  more  love  for  thee. 
O  how  can  I  but  be  in  a  flame  of  love  at  this  time. 

July  1 6th,  I  rode  to  Horton  and  preached  there,  but 
to  my  sorrow  found  some  that  had  been  awakened,  turned 
back  again.  O  the  deplorable  condition  of  those  that  turn- 
ed back  again,  and  walk  no  more  with  Jesus.      The  next 


LIFE   AND  JOURKAL. 


t  only  deni- 
,ent,  telling 
uld  leave  it 

and  >'ndi- 

in    a   short 

rhe   young 

cience,  that 

He  came 

;  that  he 
1  malicious 

almost  ev- 
f  any  ser- 
U  which  he 
if  he  could 
as  brought 
'ust,  a  sin- 
ity.      And 

of  others 
more  jxjsi- 

be  wholly 
ird  to  false 
d  the  pee- 
ing in  the 

to  all  but 
dcd  spirit 
at  up  until 
h  distres- 
though  he 

a  blessing 
nd  many 
ians  came 
as  there ; 
ed  happy 

ray  re- 
hile  I  was 

dear  Je- 
;  for  thee. 

riere,  but 
:d,  turned 
that  turn- 
The  next 


'// 


day  I  went  to  Falmouth,  and  a  good  day  it  was  to  my  soul. 
I  found  my  christian  friends  well,  but  religion  amongst 
them  not  so  lively  ;  yet  still  may  we  rejoice  ;  for  although 
the  religious  fall,  they  shall  rise  again.  Hearing  that  one  of 
the  brethren  of  the  church  at  Newport  was  at  the  point  of 
death,  I  went  over,  found  him  low  in  body,  but  happy  in 
mind,  triumphing  over  death  and  tl>e  grave,  1  preached  a 
lecture  the  next  maining,  ami  then  went  to  llorton  and 
preached  the  same  day.  The  last  Sabl)ath  in  July  I  was  iu 
Cornwallis,  and  met  the  church,  when  five  members  were 
added.  I  remained  preaching  tlie  sweet  mysteries  of  the 
cross,  and  enjoyed  many  happy  hours  in  Cornwallis  until 
the  3d  of  August ;  then  went  to  Hortoii,  found  the  chris- 
tians revived.  I  then  went  to  Falmouth  and  Newport, 
preached  to  them,  visited  many,  and  then  took  leave  of  them 
again  for  a  season,  expecting  to  go  again  to  Cornwallis,  An- 
napolis and  St.  John's  :  but  to  my  sorrow  I  found  tlie  enemy 
/getting  in  among  the  christians  in  warm  debate,  and  sowing 
(liscord  about  non-essential  matters*  O  that  ever  christians 
should  contend  about  that,  which  never  was  nor  never  will 
be  of  any  benefit  to  their  souls,  (as  is  often  the  case)  instead 
of  contending  for  the  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus.  The  first  Sab- 
bath we  had  a  blessed  meeting ;  five  joined  tlie  church, 
three  had  joined  the  evening  before.  We  had  tlie  sacra- 
ment in  the  field,  because  the  house  we  had  could  not  con- 
tain the  people,  that  attended  the  public  worship  with  us. 
Many  of  the  christia<ns  seemed  very  happy,  but  some  sisters 
fettered  in  their  minds  about  water-baptism  began  to  be 
dead  and  dull.  I  spent  what  time  I  could,  with  my  friends, 
labouring  to  quash  those  vain  disputes,  and  many  soon  got 
their  minds  free*  I  now  bid  all  my  friends  farewell  for  n 
season,  and  set  out  foi'  Annapolis.  And  O  the  kindness  of 
God  to  me  I  What  shall  I  say  of  his  love.  I^ord  God,  give 
me  thy  spirit,  that  I  may  love  and  serve  thee  with  my  body 
and  soul,  all  the  days  of  my  life. 

Take  me,  send  me,  O  thou  indulgent  God,  '    ' 

To  spread  the  blest  Redeemer's  love  abroad: 

Send  me,  O  God,  the  gospel  trump  to  blow, 

To  mortals  dead  in  sin,  and  doom'd  to  wo,        '  ' 

That  they  may  kno'v  thy  love,  before  too  late 

They  rue  in  darkness  their  eternal  state. 

And  when  I  came  to  Wilmot  I  found  a  young  man 
there  come  out  rejoicing  in  the  King  of  Heaven.     O  the 


r — 


7i 


REV.   HENRY  ALLIME's 


[1,11 


wonders  of  thut  love.  When  I  came  to  Granville,  I  found 
tlic  society  still  eni^aji;e(l  in  the  cause  of  God  :  but  many 
scoflin;.?;,  making  their  bands  strong.  O  that  they  knew  in 
this  their  day  the  things  that  belong  to  their  everlasting 
peace,  before  it  is  for  ever  hid  from  their  eyes.  O  that  their 
souls  might  be  saved  in  the  day  of  Christ's  appearing.  I 
then  went  from  place  to  place  preaching  night  and  day, 
and  labouring  in  conversation  at  every  opportunity.  But  O 
1  want  more  love  and  humility.  I  now  went  on  board  a 
vessel  for  St.  John's  river  ;  but  lay  six  days  in  Annapolis 
hason  :  yet  the  Lord  was  kind  to  me,  I  enjoyed  some  hap- 
py hours  there. 

Blest  be  the  hand  that  stills  the  swelling"  tide, 
That  man  with  tottering  barques  securely  ride  : 
Or  else  for  them  provides  some  sheltering  bay, 
Guarded  Irom  danger  till  the  storms  allay.     , 
YetO  how  few  among  the  seamen  are, 
That  feel  a  sense  of  heaven's  indulgent  care. 
How  few  returns  of  love  to  that  kind  hand, 
That  guards  them  still,  and  brings  them  safe  to  land. 

And  while  I  remained  there  I  went  ashore  to  a  small 
village,  and  preached  a  lecture  ;  and  who  knows  what  Gcd 
may  design  by  this  wind  ?  O  might  it  be  the  means  of  con- 
verting one  soul  among  that  small  number.  On  Saturday 
morning  the  wind  changed,  and  we  reached  St.  John's  in 
the  evening.  Sabbath  day  morning  I  gave  out  word  that  I 
would  preach,  and  there  was  a  great  attention  given  by 
some  :  and  O  the  kindness  of  God  in  providing  me  a  con- 
venience to  carry  me  on  my  way.  The  commanding  Offi- 
cci'  treated  me  with  civility,  and  told  me  that  he  was  to  send 
his  barge  up  the  river  :  so  that  it  was  not  delayed,  but  went 
immediately  up  the  river  ;  and  although  it  was  something 
disagreeable  going  up  in  an  open  boat,  and  especially  as  it 
stormed  all  the  night,  yet  I  enjoyed  some  sense  of  God's 
goodness,  and  got  up  to  Maugertield  about  ten  in  the  morn- 
ing. My  friends  were  rejoiced  to  see  me  returned  j  and  I 
was  rejoiced  to  find  many  souls  born  to  Christ  since  I  was 
last  there  ;  and  what  was  something  remarkable  and  like- 
wise uncommon,  3  or  4  were  upwards  of  50  years  of  age. 

September.  The  church  met  as  soon  as  possible  af- 
ter I  came  there,  and  made  choice  of  two  elders  and  two 
deacons.  One  of  the  elders  came  since  out  in  public,  and 
appears  likely  to  be  a  useful  man.  The  power  of  religion 
was  reviving,  but  the  enemies  raging  ;  yet  tlie  christians 


i,  I  found 

but  many 
y  knew  in 
vtrlusting 
'  that  tliL'ir 
.^urin}.';.  I 
and  day, 
y.  But  U 
11  board  a 
AnnapolU 
iome  hap- 


•  » 

le 


LIFE  AND  JOURKAL. 


^7 


»>! 


to  land. 

to  a  small 
Avhat  God 
;ans  of  ccn- 
1  Saturday 
John's   in 
ord  that  I 
given  by 
me  a  con- 
ding  Offi- 
as  to  send 
,  but  went 
omething 
ially  as  it 
of  God's 
the  morn- 
d  ;  and  I 
ce  I  was 
and  like- 
of  age. 
ssible  af- 
and  two 
iblic,  and 
religion 
hristians 


A 


seemed  not  to  regard  it,  but  still  pressed  forward  to  the 
City  of  Rest.  Many  professors  of  religion  not  only  oppose 
and  reject  the  gospel,  but  likewise  labour  to  prejudice  the 
minds  of  others  against  the  work  of  God.  Wo  unto  them 
tliat  will  neitlier  enter  into  the  kingdom  themselves, 
nor  suffer  thosse,  that  ?re  entering  in,  to  enter. 

I  SPENT  much  time  in  discoursing  and  preached  often. 
O  that  it  might  prove  a  blessing  to  their  souls,  and  to  be 
the  glory  of  God.  One  evening  a  sincere  christian  came 
to  me  (l)ei!ig  under  such  trials  of  mind  as  almost  sunk  liim 
in  despondency)  wringing  his  hands  and  crying,  O  what 
shall  I  do,  or  where  shall  I  flee  ?  I  fear  I  am  deceived.  (> 
tlic  thoughts  of  having  a  false  hope.  If  I  were  a  christian, 
how  could  I  live  so  far  from  God,  and  be  guilty  of  so  ma- 
ny sins  ?  Although  he  was  such  a  man,  that  there  was  per- 
haps not  one  in  twenty  that  lived  so  unspotted  in  the 
world.  But  it  is  a  truth,  that  the  neai'cr  a  soul  lives  to 
God,  the  tenderer  is  his  conscience.  The  number  of  chris- 
tians increased  fast,  and  likewise  their  gifts  and  graces. 
When  I  was  about  coming  away,  the  church  met,  and 
gave  me  a  call  to  stay  witJi  them  as  much  as  posssible. 
To  which  I  gave  them  an  answer  as  folio ws^— 

To  THE  Church  of  Christ  i-n  Maugerfield. 
Dearly  beloved  in  the  Lord,. 

Im  answer  to  your  request  1  dfesire  under  a  deep  sense 
of  my  own  inability,  not  only  to  acknowledge  my  own  un- 
worthiness  to  be  called  a  servant  of  the  Lord  to  his  church  ; 
but  at  the  same  time  may  the  honour  of  God,  and  the  wel- 
fare of  precious  and  immortal  souls  ever  excite  a  cheerful 
obedience  to  the  call  of  God,  while  I  am  indulged  to  act  on 
the  mortal  side  of  the  grave  ;  accounting  it  the  greatest 
honour  that  God  can  confer  on  me,  to  wash  the  feet  of  his 
saints  ;  and  although  1  have  yet  no-  expectation  of  being 
called  to  settle  over  any  particular  church  or  flock  ;  yet  I 
dare  not  refuse  the  utmost  of  my  endeavours  to  promote 
the  welfare  of  the  church  of  Christy  where  God  in  his  provi- 
dence shall  cast  my  lot ;  and  therefore  as  I  am  convinced 
of  your  being  part  of  Christ's  body,  and  settled  according  to 
the  plan  of  the  gospel,  I  can  with  cheerfulness  go  hand  in 
hand  with  you,  and  serve  you  with  the  greatest  delight  both 
in  public  and  private,  when  God  in  his  providence  shall  see 
St  to  cast  ray  lot  among  you,  making  you  the  people  of  my 

G2  . 


79 


REV*  IIENRr  ALLINE's 


I      I 


B  ■ 


■    I'' 

I, 

II 


'"      I 


;:(    .' 


I' .      '<> 


particuhir  cure  while  present,  and  charge  my  memory 
while  ah:<ciit  ;  Icavinrj  it  tu  the  ijjrcat  Uulur  of  all  things  tu 
determine  how  long  or  how  often  I  shall  be  witli  you.  At 
the  same  time,  dear  brethren  and  sisters,  intreating  you  in 
the  bowels  of  the  meek  and  lowly  Jesus  to  watch  over  mc 
in  love  and  faithfulness,  remembering  my  labours  in  the 
gospel,  that  you  bear  me  on  your  mind  at  your  Father's 
throne,  as  a  particular  subject  of  your  prayers,  while 
present  or  absent,  that  I  may  be  a  lasting  blessing  in  the 
hand  of  God  to  you  and  others  :  to  which  end  may  the  glo- 
ry redound  to  Father,  Son  and  Holy  Spirit,  amen  and  amen. 
And  wishing  Grace,  Mercy  and  Peace  to  attend  you,  with 
the  same  to  all  the  followers  of  the  Lamb.  I  have  subscrib- 
ed myself  Your  unworthy  servant  in  the  Lord, 
October  29th,  1779.  HENRY  ALLINE. 
October  31st.  After  preaching  two  sermons  I  bid 
them  farewell  to  go  down  the  nver,  promising  to  see  them, 
if  God  permitted.  Preached  in  different  places  as  I  went 
down  the  river,  and  saw  the  power  of  God  among  sinners. 
i  Some  groaning  under  a  load  of  sin,  and  some  come  out  re- 
^i  joicing  in  God  their  Saviour.  Some  children  of  10  to  13 
yisars  of  age  crying  out,  Where,  where  shall  I  fly,  that  I 
might  get  rid  of  my  si.is,  darkness  and  death,  that  I  might 
love  God  with  all  my  soul. 

The  6th  of  November  I  got  down  to  the  mouth  of  the 
river,  remained  there  some  time  waiting  for  a  passage  a- 
cross  the  bay.  I  trust  it  was  not  in  vain.  One  who  was 
a  stranger  happened  there,  vho  at  a  sermon  was  taken  hold 
of,  and  never  left  me,  until  he  was  brought  to  the  knowl- 
edge of  a  Saviour.  Thus  God  by  unseen  ways  brings  a- 
bout  the  salvation  of  dying  souls,  O  may  the  blessed  Jesus 
have  the  praise. 

November  13th,  left  Fort  Howe  and  reached  Annap- 
olis in  about  seven  hours  ;  found  many  still  pressing  into 
the  kingdom  of  God,  and  my  soul  enjoyed  great  liberty  in 
the  gospel,  and  had  a  longing  desire  to  proclaim  the  Re- 
deemer's name.  ,_,  - 

Look  down,  look  down,  dear  Jesus,  let  me  go 

Unto  my  fellow  mortals  donm'd  to  woe. 

Fain  would  I  go  in  thy  all-worthy  name 

To  spread  thy  goodness  and  thy  lusting  fame. 

O  send  me,  send  me,  to  the  guilty  race, 
.  With  the  glad  tidings  of  redeeming  grace. 

O  send  me,  send  me,  Jesus,  I  implore 

To  sound  thy  blessed  same  from  shore  to  shore. 


LiPK  v.vD  jyrnNAf . 


f9 


them, 
I  went 


mtmorj.' 

things  tu 

you.     At 

n^  you  in 

I  over  me 

rs  in  the 

L-  Futher's 

rs,    while 

n<.r  in  the 

\y  tlie  glo- 

and  amen. 

I  you,  with 

e  subacrib- 

uord, 

LLINE. 

ions    1  bid 

i  see 

at 

irit>-  sinners. 
'J 

3Uie  out  re- 

pf   10   to  IS 

fly,  that  I 

hat  I  might 

louth  of  the 
passage  a- 
iie  who  was 
taken  hold 
the  knowl- 
's  brings  a- 
lessed  Jesus 

hed  Annap- 

ressing  into 

at  liberty  in 

"aim  the  Re- 


Many  reproachei  wcri  cast  out  .u^aiiist  the  woik  of 
God  ;  but  all  cannot  obstruct  it.  Thj  l.uid  slill  coati:)Me:> 
hii  goodness,  and  the  people  of  CioJ  are  much  civ^agcd  in 
Jii;i  cause.  IJut  ()  what  a  shockin;.;  thought  it  i.-i,  tluU  tiie  oi.ly 
thing  that  can  possibly  make  poor  souls  happy,  audthe  only 
way  that  God  has,  or  could  hnd  out,  should  bj  so  opposed 
and  rejected,  as  it  is  by  many  ;  when  God  looks  down  IVcjui 
above  with  pity,  to  miU:e  poor  souls  the  heirs  of  his  un- 
bounded love. 

And  sending  his  heralds  with  a  powerful  sway. 
And  hanrned  souU  tUe  gospcl-sOUMd  obey. 
Then  legal  priesti  and  phariseti  engaije 
Ag-ainst  llie  Saviour  with  infernal  rage  ; 
Reject  that  love  which  woukl  their  souls  redeem  i 
Because  against  iheir  pride  and  carnal  sclunie. 

But  sometimes  I  luve  seen    that  their  ragj  and     k> 
bour  against  the  Redeemer's  cause  have  been    the   means 
of  doing  good  ;  although  no  thanks  to  them,  but  when  they 
have  manifest'jd  such  spite  against  the  cin  istiiuis,   us  thai 
the  blind  world  have  seen    it  was   from  a  dark  region,  and 
convinced  they  were  wholly  lead  by  a  bad  spirit,  and  tjierc- 
fure  many  have  turned,   and  some,   that  before  were    vile, 
have  met  with  a  saving  change.  O  it  was  a  great  joy  to  see 
some  young    mi^n,  who  had    been   profane    swearers,  now 
v/itnessing  for  God,  nroclaiming  the  wonders   of  his  love, 
and  what  he  had  done  for  their  souls,  and  exhorting  their 
former  companions  to  flee  from  the  wrath  to  come  :  and  in- 
stead of  meeting,  as  they  often  hud  done,   for  carnal  pleas- 
ures now  meeting  for  the  glory  of  God.      One  young  man 
after  sermon  got  up,  and  told  what  God  had   done  for  his 
soul  ;  and  related  the    remarkable  goodness  of  God  in  de- 
livering him  from  the  jaws  of  the  roaring  lion  and  from  irre- 
vocable, runi.  Once  when  he  was  about  drowning  himself  by 
reason  of  despairing  temptations.      Another  time  when  he 
had   sharpened    his  knife  to  cut  his  throat.  lie    thought  he 
would  go  into  another  roomoftlie  house  first  for  a  little 
time  :  the  woman  of  the  house  happened  to  be  in  tlie  room  ; 
who  (not  knowing  any  thin<jj  of  his  design)   lianded  him  a 
book,  and  told  him  to  read  that  passage,  which  she  turned 
to,  which  being  applicable  to  his  state  and  present  case,  and 
an  encouragement  for  sinners  bordering  on  despair,  was  set 
home  to  him,  and  prevented  his  ruin.     Another  time  lie 
said,  he  drew  a  sword  (being  in  his  chamber)  put  the  point 
of  it  to  his  breast  and  the  other  end  against  the  wall,  in- 


lore. 


r»,t!S 


■«««« 


8f. 


REV.   HEN'HY   ALLINK*S 


■f   ^' 


'I'  I  ri  li 


V  li 


tendhi;;  to  thrust  his  body  on  it,  ^vhell  he  was  struck  witlt' 
a  tremjbling?  vNith  a  forbear  behig  spoken  as  it  were  to  his 
heart,  he  then  refrained,  and  hid  the  sword  under  his  pil- 
low, intendini^  to  put  it  olf  for  the  present ;  but  the  sword 
was  found,  and  taken  away.  And  after  all  this,  I  trust,  was 
brought  to  the  knowledge  of  a  Saviour.  O  the  wonders  of 
redeeming  love  I  O  how  great  is  the  goodness  of  God, 
how  boundless  his  love  and  how  free  his  grace  I  And  yet 
how  little  is  he  loved  and  served  by  his  creatures.  Ah  how 
little  regard  is  paid  to  his  ways.  O  is  it  possible  for  so 
great  a  being,  so  good  and  merciful  a  being  tc  be  so  little 
regarded,  when  all  the  race  of  Adam  is  absolutely  and  e- 
ternally  dependent  on  hii>i..  ()  that  the  ?v'ofld  were  awake 
to  know  tlieir  state,  themselves  and  their  Creator. 

Dkckmheti  loth,  1  went  to  Cornwallis  with  two  men 
in  comp'.my  ;  and  great  was  the  goodness  of  God  to  my 
soul  on  the  journey  O  I  thought  I  enjoyed  that,  which 
the  world  knows  I'othing  of,  and  which  my  sou)  esteems 
more  th-m  ten  thousand  worlds.  But  O  my  i.igratitude, 
cruel  ingratitude  ;  how  it  still  torments  my  impnsoned  soul 
and  bars  me  from  enlargement  of  mind.  The  christians 
were  sometmics  bkot  with  liberty  in  their  souls  :  but  the 
work  of  conviction  had  been  dec  ining  ever  since  the  dis- 
putes began  -about  water  baptism.  O  that  christians  would 
think  what  they  are  about,  when  warmly  contending  about 
such  non-essential  matters  ;  and  that  they  are  not  only  laying 
stumbling  blocks  before  the  blind  world,  but  neglect  also  the 
vitals  of  religion,  and  the  salvation  of  poor  unconverted- 
souls.  I  went  to  Horton,  had  great  freedom  to  proclair.i 
the  Redeemer's  blessed  name  ;  and  the  Lord  sent  bless- 
ings bv  me  to- his  children.  The  next  day  I  went  to  Fal- 
mouth. The  Lord  seemed  to  be  reviving  his  work  again. 
One  woman  who  was  in  great  distress,  when  I  left  that 
town,  was  now  rejoicing  in  the  glorious  plan  of  life  and  salva- 
tion through  a  blessed  Redeemer.  O  that  God  would  engage 
my  soul  and  the  souls  of  others  to  exalthisworthy  name.  But 
ah  what  are  the  praises  of  angels  or  men  to  God  ?  I  soon 
returne,d  to  Horton  and  Cornwallis  again,  preached  there 
often,  and  enjoyed  some  happy  hours  in  my  OAvn  soul ;  and 
many  of  the  christians  were  so  much  indulged  with  the  pres- 
ence of  God,  that  they  could  scarcely  speak.  O  may  the 
name  of  Jesus  get  the  praise.  Oftentimes  after  sermon 
the  saints  would  arise,  exhort  and  witness  for  God.     1  went. 


LIFE   AND    JOURNAL, 


•  I 


)  his 
>  pil- 
word 
:,  was 
ers  of 
God, 
id  yet 
[i  how 
for  so 
oUttle 
and  e- 
awake 

0  men 
to  wy 
which 
;steems 
atitude, 
led  soul 
wistians 
but  the 
:he  dis- 
iS  would 
about 
[y  laying 


ui^ain  to  Ilortor.,  found  great  liljerly  in  preaching :  from 
thence  I  went  to  Ijalniouth.  Iher^  had  been  a  great  fall 
of  snow,  and  I  beins^  alone,  was  most  overcome,  for  the 
snow  v/as  so  deep,  that  1  was  ol)lii^v:d  part  of  the  way  to 
beat  before  the  horse  :  but  the  Lord  was  beyond  measure 
kind  to  me.  I  thought  I  enjoyed  more  happiness  in  all 
my  troubles  and  worrying  through  the  snow,  than  thousands 
who  were  in  their  cieled  houses,  with  all  which  this  world 
can  give  them.  I  enjoyed  also  t^-eat  happiness  with  my 
friends  in  Falmouth,  where  I  remained  about  14  days.  O 
shall  I  one  day  meet  all  the  christians  in  the  realms  of  e- 
terna!  rest  I  Can  it  possibly  be  that  I  shall  be  one  of  that 
happy  and  blessed  number,  that  shall  rejoice  for  ever  in  the 
infinite  Ciod,  and  solace  myself  in  the  unbounded  ocean  of 
self  existing  love  !  After  this  i  went  to  Cornwallis,  found 
the  christians  something  strong  in  the  faith  ;  and  all  those 
that  had  professed  to  have  met  with  a  change,  but  two  or 
three  remained  lively,  and  living  witnesses  of  the  glorious 
gospel :  but  many  that  had  been  awakened  are  gone  back  to 
sin  and  vanity,  and  the  work  of  conviction  declining  ;  and 
to  my  sorrow,  some  unprofitable  disputes  about  water  bap- 
tism.- I  then  returned  to  Horton,  where  I  was  much  in- 
dulged with  the  presence  of  God,  and  liberty  in  the  gos- 
pel ;  but  not  much  work  appeared  among  the  sinners. 

;f  February  2^.  1  went  again  to  Cornwallis,  saw  some 
small  movings  among  the  sinners,  and  the  christians  stirred 
up.  O  that  God  would  revive  his  own  work  again,  and 
bring  more  precious  and  immortal  souls  to  enjoy  the  won- 
ders of  redeeming  love.  February  lOth,  I  went  to  Horton 
and  preached  there,  and  from  thence  to  Falmouth.  I  en- 
joyed much  of  Go<rs  love  on  the  way  and  while  in  Fal- 
mouth. O  that  I  could  continually  live  to,  and  walk  with 
God  wherever  I  go,  and  enjoy  his  love  in  a  greater  degree. 
If  it  was  not  for  pride  and  unbelief,  my  soul  would  rejoice 
continually  :  but  O  I  shall  never  get  rid  of  all  those  chains, 
until  I  leave  this  mortal  world.  O  may  I  then  go  to  my 
Father.  I  remained  some  tin^e  at  Falmouth,  and  then  took 
my  leave  from  them  for  six  ijionths,  intending  again  to  go 
to  Annapolis  and  to  the  river  St.  John's.  When  I  came  to 
Horton  I  found  a  man  who  had  been  a  great  opposer  to  the 
work,  brought  to  the  knowledge  of  Christ,  and  proclaiming 
what  God  had  done  for  his  soul :  many  others  seemed 
much  stirred  up,  and  inquiring  after  Jesus.     O  may  it  con* 


1  went. 


82 


REV.   HENRY  ALLINE*S 


['lasting 


I 


fr. 


Lh 


Corn- 


3  then'  everlasting  joy.    l  went  trom  Uience 
.o,  stayed  their  the  Sabl)ath  and  preached  ;  and  then  re- 


tinue 
wallis 

turned  to  Horton  again  ;  where  the  work  seemed  to  be  re- 
Yiving.  I  preached  often  while  there,  and  the  Lord  biessed 
mv  labours.  I  then  went  to  Cornwallis,  staved  a  short 
time,  £'nd  set  out  for  Annapolis.  O  that  I  could  be  wholly 
for  that  blessed  Redeemer,  who  has  so  freely  given  his  life 
for  me,  and  all  the  fallen  world.  O  that  J.  had  an  humble 
place  near  his  blessed  feet  to  be  swallowed  up  in  God, 

1  long  to  walk  and  live  so  near  to  God  ; 
As  always  taste  the  sweetness  of  his  word  : 
And  ev'ry  pow*r  of  heart  and  soul  engage, 
To  spread  his  name  while  on  this  mortal  stage. 
T!ien,  then,  O  then  let  me  forever  soar, 
To  realms  of  light,  where  storms  are  known  no  more  ; 
There  where  my  Jesus  in  his  glory  reigns. 
Let  me  arise  to  strike  the  highest  strains  : 
There  let  my  soul  through  endless  ages  rove 
O'er  the  perfections  of  my  Saviour's  love. 

BiTT  O  when  I  speak  of  those  solemn  and  soul  trans- 
porting  truths,  why  is  not  my  whole  soul  ravished  v  ith; 
sacred  joy  and  humbled  at  my  Saviour's  feet  more  than  I- 
am  ? 

Makch  10th,  I  set  out  from  Annapolis  on  snow  shoes  ; 
as  there  %vas  no  riding  on  account  of  the  depth  of  the  snow., 
A  yoiing  man  went  with  me  to  carry  my  saddle-bags.  AVe 
had  to  \valk  forty  mrles  before  we  could  ride  .  I  travelled 
the  forty  miles  in  five  days.  The  next  day  I  preached  and 
found  the  work  of  God  reviving*  Some  who  were  oppos- 
es, the  last  time  I  vr?^  there,  were  now  falling  in  with  the 
work  and  inquiring  what  they  must  do  to  be  saved.  One 
man  took  me  by  the  hand,  saying  I  am  rejoiced  at  your  re- 
turn this  way,  although  the  time  has  been  when  I  have  seen 
you  passing  my  house,  if  it  had  not  been  for  the  law,  I 
would  have  murdered  you.  O  the  power  and  goodness  of 
God  among  the  sons  of  men  f  When  I  came  down  to 
Granville  we  had  a  day  of  fasting  and  prayer,  and  conclu- 
ded tf  proceed,  us  had  been  thought  of  before  to  embody 
and  v.aik  in  church  oixler.  The  next  day  the  christians 
came  out  in  public  meeting  declaring  what  God  had  done 
for  their  souls  and  joining  in  church-iellowship.  Different 
opinions  about  water-baptism  was  not  thought  a  iufficient 
bar,  and  therefore  they  joined  congregations,  and  as  to- 
¥aptism  each  one  enjoyed  a  liberty  of  conscience.     O  thRt 


orn- 
11  re- 
i  re- 
issed 
short 
hoUy 
is  liie 
inible 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL, 


63 


ore  •, 


trars- 
d  vitlv 
than  I- 

shoes ; 
snow,. 

We 

•avelled 

led  and 

oppos- 

ith  the 

One 
our  re- 
Lve  seen 
law,   I 
iness  of 
|own  to 
concUi- 
imbody 
ivistians 
td  done 
lifferent 
^ifficient 

as  to- 

O  th^t 


1 


V  M 


God  would  set  his  name  there,   increase  their  love,  their 
srength  and  number  to  the  end  of  the  world.     1   remained 
ridini^  about  from  place  to  place,  and  preached  often,  imtil 
the  2  1st  of  April,  when  I  went  on  board  of  a  vessel  to  sail 
to  St.  John's,  and  arrived  there  the  next  day.     1  preached 
on  the  Sabbath,  remained  there  until  the  next  Sabbath  day, 
^\nd  spent  my  time  in  a  chamber  by  myself,  chiefly  at  my 
pen,  which  may  be  a  blessino;  to  some,  after  I   am  in  my 
grave.     I  then  went  on  board  a  vessel  to  go  u])  the  river, 
but  by  reason  of  a  head  v/ind,  was  Tour  days  going  up  ;  but 
1  still  employed  r»iy  pen,  and  could  not  but  admire  the  wis- 
dom of  God  in  this  particular ;  for  when  I  was  on  land,   I 
preached  so  often,  that  I  could  not  get  much  time  to  write. 
And  O  how  kind  the  Lord  was  to  me,  to  give  me  such  man- 
ifestations of  love,  as  I  was  often  indulged  with.     O  that  I 
could  live  wholly  to  God.      When    I  came  up   the  river  I 
found  the  christians  under  some  trials   about  some    difficul- 
ties ;  but  the  Lord  was  pleased  to  remove  them  so  far,  that 
they  went  on  still  rejoicing.    O  the  wisdom  that  it  requires 
for  christians   to  walk  through  this  ensnaring  world,    and 
what  care  ought  they  to  take  not  to  lay  stumbling  blocks  in 
the  way  of  the  blind  ;  and  how  ought  they  to  employ  both 
body  and  soul  in  the  Redeemer's  cause.  I  remained  preach- 
ing and  visiting  from  place  to  place,  passed  through  many 
trials,  and  enjoyed  many  happy  hours  until  the  5th  of  June» 
and  then  began  to  go  down  the  river.    I  preached  at  se\eral 
places,  as  I  went  down  ;  but  the  work  of  God  was  not  so 
powerful  as  it  had  been,  although  many  of  the  christians 
were  very  happy,  and  some  souls  were  born  to  God.     O 
may  Jesus  continue  a  good  work  in  the  land,  and  bless  them 
with  the  outpouring  of  his  spirit.     Much  company  went 
with  me  from  place  to  place,  sometimes  six  or  seven  boats 
loaded  with  people.     When  I  came  to  the  river's  mouth  I 
was  obliged  to  tarry  a  fiorthnight  waiting  for  a  passage,  but 
I  hope  it  was  not  in  vain ;  for  I  preached  and  visited  the 
people. 

June  the  25th.  I  left  St.  John's  river  and  went  to 
Annapolis.  When  I  came  there,  I  was  blessed  with  some 
sense  of  God's  goodness  to  me,  so  that  my  heart  was  filled 
with  love  to  God,  and  1  enjoyed  a  happy  day.  I  heard  by 
some  friends  that  the  disputes  about  water-baptism  were 
increased,  and  had  risen  to  such  a  height,  that  there  was  a 
talk  of  a  separation  ;  but  God  blessed  me  in  enabling  me 


m 

'IS 


«4 


r.IV.  HENRY   ALMNh's 


t   i 


i  i , 


to  bear  the  burUtn,  tind  go  forward  in  the  gc 'spel;  through 
the  unspeakable  trials  1  met  with,  and  revived  a  senLe  of 
divine  truths  among  many  of  the  christians,  so  that  the 
vain  disputes  began  to  cease,  and  some  sinners  were 
brought  imder  conviction.  O  that  the  Redeenicr's  king- 
dom might  revive,  and  souls  be  born  to  Christ.  Yea  it  is  my 
soul's  desire  that  God  would  make  me  instrumental  in  ad- 
vancing the  honour  of  h4s  l)lessed  name  :  for  wli)-  should  I 
live,  but  to  spread  the  wonders  of  redeeming  love  thiough 
the  blessed  gospel  ?  or  what  could  all  the  v/orld  afib;  d  me 
without  divine  joy  ?  O  it  is  Jesus  alone  that  makes  my 
moments  sweet,  and  supports  me  in  all  my  trials. 

July.     I  came  to   Cornwallis,  and    remained  there  a- 
bout  four  days,  and  found  too  much  of  the    dispute;-,  about 
v/ater-baptism    existing  among  some  of  the  christians.     O 
how  much  advantage  does  the  enemy  get  in  the  minds  of 
christians    by    those    zef.lous     disputes   aboi.t   non-essen- 
tials ;     making  that   the   chief  subject  of  their  discourses 
when  the  essentials  or  work  of  God  is  neglected.     I  have 
often  observed  in  the  short  compass  of  my   ministry,  that 
when  the  christians  get  much  of  the  life  of  religion  with  the 
love  of  God  in  their  souls,  those  small  matters  were  scarce- 
ly talked  of,  but  whenever  they  met  their  discourse  was  a- 
bout  the  work  of  God  in  the  heart,  and  what  God  had  done 
for  their  souls  ;  inviting  sinners  to  come  to  Christ,  and  set- 
ting forth  in  their  conversation  the   important  truths  of  the 
gospel ;  but  as  soon  as  religion  grows   cold,   then  they  sit 
hours  and   hours  discoursing   about  those    things    wlilch 
would  never  be  of  service  to  body  or  soul,  and  proving   the 
validity  of  their  own  method  or  form  of  some  external  mat- 
ters, and  condemn   others,  who  do  not  think   as  they  do. 
Ah,  how  many  hours  have  I  seen  spent  even  among  chris- 
tians to  prove  the  different  methods  of  water-baptism  either 
to  infants  or  adults,   either  by  sprinkling   or   immersion  ; 
when  it  would  not  at  all  help  the  poor  so\d  in  the  least  out 
of  its  fallen  state  back  to  God  without  the  true  baptism  of 
the  spirit  of  Christ,  which  alone  can.    O  that  all  the  distinc- 
tion might  be  made  only   this,  to   wit,  christians   and  the 
world  :  converted  or  unconverted.     And  that  the  christians 
or  children  of  God  might  go  hand  in  hand,  as  if  there  was 
no  difference  among  them,  since  they  are  all  agreed  in  the 
essentials  :  yea  methinks  every  thing  else  is  too  small  to  be 
.mentioned  among  them. 


LIFE  AN*D  JOURNAL. 


85 


.* 


■ough 
Le   of 
t   the 

king- 
is  my 
in  acl- 
ould  I 
rough 
li  lI  me 
s  my 


lere  a- 
•,  about 
IS.     O 
nds  of 
-tssen- 
ourses 
1  iiuve 
ry,  that 
yiih  the 
scare c- 
was  a- 
ul  done 
Liid  set- 
of  the 
ley  sit 
\\  liich 
the 
al  mat- 
ley  do. 
chris- 
1  cither 
rsion  ; 
ast  out 
itism  of 
distinc- 
and  tlie 
ristians 
re  ^vas 
i  in  the 
ill  to  be 


ng 


I 


JuLT  6th.  I  went  to  Horton,  preached  tb/^re  tw'o  days 
*nd  enjoyed  happy  hours  with  the  brethren  and  sisters.  O 
the  mercies  I  have  found  given  to  the  saints  of  God  !  And 
if  this  happiness  is  so  great  in  this  world  under  so  many  dis- 
t)rders,  darkness  and  sin  ;  what  will  be  the  unspeakable  hap- 
piness of  meeting  them  in  etenial  felicity  !  O  sl^all  I  one 
day  be  found  among  that  happy  number,  swallowed  up  in 
everlasting  love.  I  now  went  to  Falmouth,  where  I  was 
much  encouraged,  seeing  the  people  throng  to  hear  the 
word,  and  found  no  disputes  there  about  those  non-essential 
matters  ;  for  they  seemed  to  enjoy  so  much  of  the  vitals  of 
religion  and  presence  of  God,  as  to  lift  them  up  al)ove  all 
sectarian  zeal.  O  what  stuff  and  darkness  will  the  love  of  the 
meek  and  lowly  Jesus  burn  up  and  expel.  O  that  his  love 
might  so  lake  place  in  the  souls  of  the  sons  of  men,  as  to 
cement  them  all  in  the  ways  of  God,  and  all  the  fallen  race  be- 
come acquainted  with  the  great  Redeemer.  But  O  shocking 
thought  that  the  greatest  part  of  mankind  are  lost  for  ever. 

July  1 5th.  I  went  again  to  Horton:  found  some- 
thing of  the  spirit  of  God  still  among  the  people.  But  O 
I  am  amazed  at  m  vself  and  all  the  world,  that  there  are  no 
more  impressions  of  divine  things  on  my  mind.  And  O 
how  can  it  be  that  the  perishing  Ivorld  can  possibly  remahi 
so  insensible  of  their  standing  ;  death  threatening,  time  piis:- 
sing  an  ay,  eternity  approaching,  and  the  soul  condemned  ; 
and  with  redeeming  love  all  around  them  :  all  things  a- 
larming  ihem  to  flee  from  irrevocable  ruin,  and  at  the  same 
time  Christ  inviting  them  to  eternal  felicity  with  alluring 
charms  and  endearing  expressions.  How  fatal  are  the 
bars  of  death  that  charm  immortal  soujs  to  everlasting 
pains. 

O  mighty  Jesus,  rouse  their  souls  to  fly 
From  endless  ruin  while  his  love  is  nigh. 
Save  them,  O  Jesus,  by  thy  grace  divine, 
And  let  them  be   O  God,  forever  thine. 

O  that  the  world  were  awake  to  know  their  standing 
and  embrace  redeeminng  love  :  but  ah  how  little,  how  lit- 
tle do  they  know  of  themselves  ;  how  little  do  they  consid- 
er that  they  are  prisoners  of  hope,  uihabitants  of  a  moment 
and  bound  for  eternity:  self  condemned,  yet  surrounded 
with  free  and  unbounded  grace.  If  thmi  hadst  known,  saith 
Christ  to  the  woman  of  Samaria,  the  gift  of  God,  and  who 

H 


86 


'  r-'- 


REV.   HENRY  ALLIKE'S 


!    i  !i!l' 


It  is  that  asks  of  thee  to  give  him  to  drink,  thou  wouldst 
usk  of  him,  and  he  would  give  thee  the  Hving  water.  But  be- 
cause they  knewnot  the  worth  and  danger  of  their  own  souls, 
nor  tlie  worth  of  a  Redeemer's  love,  they  waste  their  days 
nncCncerned  and  post  down  to  eternal  perdition.  O  can  it 
be,  can  it  be  that  everlasting  life  should  be  offered  in  vain  : 
must  Jesus  suffer,  bleed  and  die,  and  souls  go  to  hell  at 
last  I  O  that  they  knew  the  worth  of  that  blessed  name, 
wl.ich  my  soul  does  sometimes  enjoy.  O  would  they  but  on- 
ly Iicarthe  small  whispers  of  conscience,  it  would  bring  then* 
to  see  more  and  more  their  lost  and  undone  condition,  until 
they  were  willing  to  cast  all  on  the  blessed  Jesus  Christ, 
and  receive  him  for  their  whole  portion,  tricnd  and  helper. 
But  when  conscience  begins  to  work  and  breaks  up  their 
carnal  peace,  they  will  not  hear,  but  rather  choose  to  retain 
that  carnal  peace,  which  will  stifle  the  sp?rit  of  God,  and 
thereby  expose  themselves  to  everlasting  misery. 

July  the  22d.  I  went  with  a  number  of  brethren  to 
consult  about  some  matters  that  appeared  to  he  my  duty. 
There  jippeared  a  great  harmony  among  some  bretliren 
and  u  desire  to  promote  the  vitals  of  religion,  for  I  still  found 
:\  Tuimber  alive  m  religion  and  travailing  for  the  salvation 
•)!' souls.  O  that  we  had  eiore  of  that  spirit  of  pity  that 
oncQ.  wept  over  Jerusalem.  The  next  day  we  came  to  the 
Lord's  table.  And  O  what  a  blessed  day  it  was  to  my 
soul  and  to  the  souls  of  manv  others.  But  still  I  wonder 
that  I  am  no  more  affected  when  I  come  to  the  table  : 
V,  hich  although  in  itselt  is  nothing,  yet  it  is  a  representa- 
tion of  the  most  remarkable  scene  and  solemn  sight  that 
ever  was  seen  by  angels  or  men  :  so  affecting  that  it  is  a 
wonder  that  all  the  spectators  were  not  overborne  with  the 
impression,  and  that  the  earth  was  not  more  convulsed  than 
It  was,  when  the  great  Creator  being  in  a  mortal  body  was 
in  exquisite  torments  and  weighty  sorrow.  O  can  it  be  I 
v.Lis  it  indeed  the  King  of  Glory  who  was  thus  extended  be- 
tween the  heavens  and  earth,  and  bled  and  died  for  the  sins 
of  the  fallen  world  ?  Ah  for  his  rebellious  offspring,  who 
w  ere  in  themselves  cursed,  lost  and  undone  forever.  And 
O  shnll  I  say  for  me  even  me,  and  be  no  more  affected  when 
beholdine;  the  representation.  O  what  a  heart  of  stone,  what 
an  unjeeiinp;hearthave  I,  that  can  come  to  the  means 
of  grace  with  so  little  love  and  gratitucfe.  O  the  darkness, 
death  and  inseusibility  of  my  soul     It  is  a  wonder  that  ev- 


& 


LIFE  AND  JOUllNAL. 


67 


ouldst 
ut  be- 
souls, 

days 
can  it 
vain  : 
[lell  at 
name , 
)ut  on- 
;  thcn» 
1,  iinlil 
:hrist, 
iclpcr. 

their 

retain 

:1,  and 

rcn   lo 
f  duty, 
etliren 
found 
Ivation 
y   that 
;  to  the 
to  my 
vonder 
table  : 
senta- 
t  that 
it  is  a 
ith  the 
d  than 
ly  was 
it  be  I 
led  be- 
\e  sins 
J,  who 
And 
II  whtn 
*,  what 
Imeans 
rkness, 
hat  ev- 


ery sermon  I  hear,  every  means  of  grace  I  enjoy  does  not 
carry  me  beyond  all  seuae  of  this  mortal  world.  Yea,  could 
I  see,  who  it  was  that  bled  and  died  for  every  thing,  both 
spiritual  and  temporal,  I  enjoy,  and  what  great  things  he 
has  done  and  is  still  doing  for  me,  my  heart  would  break 
with  love  to  his  name.  Every  thing  I  sje  declares  hi» 
love  and  goodness  :  Every  thing  declares  that  1  am  m-or- 
tal  and  immortal,  and  O  yet  asleep. 

Rouse  me,  O  God,  with  truths  divine, 

From  darkness  and  from  death  ; 
To  view  and  love  that  hand  of  thine 

That  gave  me  life  and  breath. 
But  O  awake  my  soul  the  more, 

With  Jesus'  dying  love  ;  . 

That  I  may  his  great  name  adore, 

While  mortal  life  shall  move. 
Then  when  I  draw  expiring  breath, 

And  leave  this  mortal  stage  ; 
Call  me  from  all  these  chains  of  death. 

And  sin's  infernal  rage. 
Let  me  awake  with  saints  above  ; ,. 

Upon  the  peaceful  shore  J  ^^ 

To  bask  in  everlasting  love 

And  ever  sin  no  more. 
There  I  shall  bow  before  his  throne, 

And  see  my  Father's  face, 
Where  death  and  sin  no  more  are  known, 
To  sing  redeeming  grace. 
But  O  what  a  mystery   of  mysteries   that  I  can  ex- 
pect ere  long  to  awake  with  God    and  enjoy  the  meek  and 
lowly  Jesus  ;  that  I  can  expect  an  everlasting  crown  when 
a  few  years  more  are  gone  ;  and  yet  be  amused  with  wliat 
is  of  no  service  eithertobodyorsoul.  Ihaveoftenthoughttliat 
if  I  was  a  christian,  had  Christ  in  me  the  hope  of  glory,  (as 
every  christian  has)  and  was  really  a  temple  for  the   living 
God,  that  I  should  be  so  carried  away  with  the  impressions 
of  that  divine  union,  as  to  be  utterly  insensible  of  anv  tliini'- 
in  this  mortal  world.     How  could  I  possibly  ever  liave  one 
cold  or  shmibering  hotir  ?    Why  is  not  my    so)il  so  attract- 
ed by  love  as  to   break  off  all  relation   with  this  t'lcmental 
world  ?    O  what  a  mystery  am  I  to  myself !  rcl.itcd  to  C^od 
and  yet  a  worm  ;  to  heaven   and  hell  ;  on  a  pinnacle   be- 
tween two  unbounded  oceans,  with  but  a  moment  of  time, 
yea,  not  sure  of  that,  an'^   yet  sure  of  an  eternity  ;  soon  to 
cast  my  die  forever  and  yet  unconcernei!.     O  Lord  (jod  a- 
wake  my  soul,  my    time,  my  eternity,  all  that   I  have,  :i:n 


83 


.*; 


REV.   HENRY    AI.LfNK's 


.1 


or  ever  shall  be.     Be  thou  mine,  and  let  me  be  thine  for«v« 
er  in  all  I  want,  I  ask  no  more. 

About  the  last  of  July  I  went  to  Falmouth,  and  from 
thence  to  Newport,  where  I  had  not  l)een  for  some  time. 
The  cluistians  were  rejoiced  to  hear  the  j^ospel,  and  got 
i'(X)d  for  tlieir  souls.  O  the  privilege  of  the  everlasting 
i^ospel  to  those  who  have  known  the  sweetness  of  divine 
truths  ;  while  the  wicked  and  ungodly  reject  it,  and  account 
it  as  a  matter  of  no  importance:  and  while  the  christians 
spare  no  pains  to  go  to  hear  the  gospel,  and  to  attend  the 
means  of  grace,  making  it  the  chief  of  their  concern,  the 
greatest  part  of  the  world  look  on  it  as  a  matter  that  doth 
not  concern  them,  and  pass  by  them  as  they  would  by  some 
idle  tales.  O  the  blindness  of  the  world!  \v  ho  that  ha* 
seen  this  fallen  state,  and  tasted  tlie  sweetness  of  redeem- 
ing k)ve,  can  forbear  to  grieve  :  when  they  see  how  many 
thousands  pass  by  and  reject  the  only  possible  way,  that  God 
could  find  out  to  make  them  happy,  until  they  rtrc  plunged 
into  inconceivable  ruin,  and  too  late  convinced  of  their  mis- 
take, and  rue  their  folly  in  everlasting  misery.  Sometimes 
when  I  have  a  small  view  of  the  state  of  the  fallen  world, 
seeing  the  innumerable  disorders,  that  have  ushered  in  by 
the  means  of  our  rebellion,  the  chains  of  darkness  and  death 
that  have  chained  the  fallen  race  down  from  a  sense  of  their 
condition,  the  shortness  of  precious  time,  the  worth  of  pre- 
cious immortal  souls,  together  with  some  taste  of  the 
sweetness  of  redeeming  love  and  the  prospect  of  the  glo-^ 
riouR.  way  of  life  and  salvation  through  the  incarnation  of 
the  Deity  ;  I  am  so  involved  in  unfathomable  myptery,  that 
I  am  ready  to  cease  from  all  endeavours  to  labour  in  the 
Redeemer's  cause,  because  the  truths  are  so  important  and 
the  impressions  are  so  small,  yea  the  truths  are  so  impor- 
tant, that  it  seems  to  perplex  all  attempts  ;  and  obliges  one 
to  cry  out.  Lord,  who  then  sliall  be  saved  ? 

Arise  ;  O  Jesus,  spread  thy  gospel  grace. 
And  help,  O  help,  the  dying  sinkin.^  race. 
Arouse  the  supine  with  thy  powerful  word  ; 
Release  the  guilty  with  thy  precious  blood, 

O  WHAT  changes  is  my  soul  sometimes  carried 
through.  In  my  private  walks  I  can  pray  and  rejoice,  and 
find  a  heaven  wherever  I  go :  and  sometimes  I  go  from 
preaching  to  preaching,  and  can  neither  pray,  nor  love,  nor 
praise  j  my  hea-t  feels  like  a  rock,  and  my  heart  is  bqunci, 


i 


LIFE   ANn  JOURNAL 


•9 


up  in  a  prison,  or  is  in  a  storm  of  fear  and  tcmi^ation,  and 
i  have  no  more  peace  than  a  man  in  the  greatest  misery. 
Yea  I  am  hke  a  man  tl\at  has  lost  all  his  friends,  until  Jesus 
returns  ;  and  then  I  forget  all  my  sorrows  ;  my  soul  can 
rejoice  in  my  God,  and  imagine  I  shall  never  see  such  dark 
hours  again.  But  ah  too  soon  I  wander  away  again  Uv  my 
pride  and  unbelieving  heart  and  mourn  without  the  sun  : 
yet  I  have  this  for  my  encouragement,  that  I  find  mystlf 
not  happy  nor  easy,  nor  at  home,  until  the  comforter  re- 
turns. 

O  Jesus,  take  me  in  thy  heav*nly  arms  ; 

And  \veai\  my  soul  from  all  these  earthly  charnvj  : 

Give  me  a  sense  ol'lhy  eternal  iove, 

To  raise  my  drooping  soul  where'er  I  rove . 

I  AM  more  and  more  convinced  that  the  world  lies  in 
darkness  and  death,  knows  nothing  of  itself  nor  of 
the  Redeemer.  Yea,  and  many  that  arc  called  christians, 
call  it  enthusiasm  to  talk  of  enjoying  the  Holy  Spirit 
here  in  this  world,  and  imagine  if  they  do  so  and  so,  God 
will  reward  them  after  death  ;  or  that  their  redemption 
consists  in  God's  being  willing  that  they  should  come  to 
heaven  when  they  die  ;  and  therefore  it  is  unknown  to  them 
where  they  are  going,  or  what  they  will  be  after  death  ; 
for  it  is  a  secret  tlidt  belongs  to  God,  to  make  it  manifest, 
when  they  have  done  with  the  world.  O  the  wretched 
blindness  of  the  fallen  world  I  when  it  is  a  real  truth,  that 
man  stands  here  for  nothing  but  to  be  redeemed,  not  after 
he  is  gone  from  hence,  but  while  he  is  here  ;  and  if  he  is 
not  redeemed  here  in  this  world,  he  never  can  be  redeemed 
hereafter  :  and  therefore  it  should  be  the  greatest  and  only 
mquiry  of  the  creature  to  know  what  is  done  in  him,  and 
whether  he  is  redeemed  or  not,  and  how  much  he  is  re- 
deemed from  sin  and  misery  ;  but  so  long  as  he  imagines 
his  everlasting  happiness  depends  on  God's  brmging  hira 
after  death  into  some  hupj^y  place  called  heaven,  he  will  be 
careless  al)out  getting  his  soul  redeemed  now.  So  thousands 
of  souls  are  kept  blind,  until  they  &re  gone  beyond  all  re- 
covery. To  carry  on  tliis  infernal  scheme,  a  number  of 
anti-christian  niinisters  are  labouring  wight  and  day  to  pixDve 
that  a  feeling  knowledge  of  redemption  in  the  soul  is  not  to 
be  attained,  and  that  all  such  pretensions  are  a  vain  imagi- 
nation and  a  delusion  ;  and  t^ll  their  hearers,  if  they  do  so 

H2 


tf 


I 


I :  I  i: 


90 


REV.   HFNRY   AI.I.lNh  :> 


and  so,  and  arc  l)aptizcd,  join  the  churcli,  come  to  the  l.ordV 
table,  and  do  tlicir  best  in  those  outward  thinp;s,  all  will  be 
well.  And  thus  they  ai*e  miu'derini^  the  precious  and  im- 
mortal soulr,  about  them.  O  that  God  would  awaken  and 
convert  them,  or  remove  them.  And  ()  that  all  maukincJ 
would  believe  that  they  need  to  be  redeemed. 

Lord  send  thy  cjlorioiis  word  abroad, 
^  And  shew  the  dying"  world  tlicir  slate  :  ,    * 

Bring- them  to  feel  the  Christ  of  God, 
Before  alas  it  is  too  late. 

About  this  time  the  work  of  God  began  to  revive  in 
Falmouth.  Some  nep;roes  were  taken  hold  of,  and  one 
came  out  and  joined  the  church.  Four  white  people  at  the 
same  time  joined  the  church,  and  God  seemed  to  be  espous- 
ing his  cause  :  many  ears  were  open  to  hear  the  gospel, 
and  some  inquiring  after  the  meel:  and  lowly  Jesus,  whom 
they  had  long  rejected,  and  despised.  Ah  the  despised  Je- 
sus indeed  !  How  many  thousands  in  the  w  orld  that  dtspise 
the  power  of  the  gospel  as  the  most  insignificant  matter,  or 
as  an  enemy  to  their  present  and  everlasting  peace.  O  how 
is  my  heart  sometimes  affected  at  the  thought  of  it.  De- 
pendent on  him,  as  we  are,  for  every  l^eitth  we  draw,  and 
held  up  by  him  from  our  own  helU  and  invited  by  his  bleed- 
ing wounds  to  liis  own  bosom,  and  yet  how  little  regarded. 
O  that  n>y  head  were  waters,  and  my  .'yes  a  fountain  of 
tears,  that  1  might  weep  day  and  night  for  the  slain  of  the 
sons  and  daughters  of  Adam.  O  that  they  were  wise,  that 
they  understood  this,  that  they  would  consider  their  latter 
end. 

I  HAVE  seen  in  my  travels  that  the  christians,  who  had 
had  a  knowledge  of  the  love  of  God,  and  the  sweetness 
of  his  blessed  name,  would  regard  no  trouble,  nor  spare  no 
pains  to  attend  the  means  of  grace,  where  the  gospel  is 
preached  with  power  ;  while  many  of  the  unconverted  would 
not  only  reject  it,  but  seem  to  make  their  boast,  that  they 
could  stand  against  it,  or  keep  from  hearing  it.  I  have 
known  many  crying  out,  by  way  of  reproach  to  the  chris- 
tians, who  held  to  the  power  of  religion,  and  would  always 
impress  the  necessity  of  conversion,  Lord,  keep  me  from 
such  a  conversion.  I  have  often  heaixl  others,  who  were 
openly  profane,  say,  I'll  be  d-m-d,  if  they  will  convert  me. 
And  some  others  would  say,  that  they  would  convert  their 
horses  or  dogs.     O  too  shocking,^  too  shocking  even  to  be 


l.lli:    AM  J  JOl'R.V.Vf. 


'•31 


Ihad 

less 

no 

is 

luld 

jiey 

ive 

I'is- 

lys 

>in 

5  re 

le. 


tliouc^lif.  Thus  tlie  woi-k  of  cmvei-s'on,  wliicli  cost  the 
blood  of  the  Son  of  God,  Ibi*  which  ?^'^n^t  tlio  world  stinds, 
and  on  which  aloro  h:in;^s  the  etL-i'n.d  And  Miiulterahlc  s^atc 
of  all  the  race  of  A d:^;n,  i:»  ma<lL'  a  rMicul'j  of  ;ibout  the 
streets,  in  frolick,   hxlU  and   taverns.      But   O   \\)it;r^   will 


such  ere  lonj^  appear,  or  how  will  t!ity  stand,  WMcn  tin^ 
mortal  mask  is  thrown  OiT;  wlieii  rocks  and  mnuntanis  wiU 
deny  them  a  shelter,  when  they  must  appear  before  ih.e  in- 
finite God,  to  stand  the  naked  test,  and  rjceive  their  ever- 
lastin^f  doom  ?  Ah  what  heait  cm  endure  the  tiioni^ht  of 
b-jinijj  a  spirit  of  darkness,  and  a  ijjrowinjj  blasphemer  to  all 
eternity. 

I  H  AVK  enjoyed  some  hapny  hours  and  p^^aceful  days, 
but  nothint^  to  wirat  I  nii'^ht,  if  my  heart  was  rii^ht  with 
God.  vSonietimes  when  1  lay  down  on  my  bed,  my  heart 
can  rejoice,  and  I  find  niy  heart  m.elted  with  love  to  God. 
Sometimes  I  t^roan,  and  Uiin  from  pole  tt)  pole,  and  cannot 
find  any  relief,  nor  get  one  groan  into  hea'  en.  O  the  dif- 
ferent scenes  of  my  life  1  Yet  blessed  be  God,  it  will  all 
prove  for  my  good. 

I  REMAINED  wlth  my  friends,  prea'.hing,  praying  and 
conversing  at  every  op[)ortanity,  and  saw  many  of  them  on 
the  mount.  I  went  to  Horton  ;  tlicre  appeared  not  much 
movings  of  the  Spirit  tliere.  From  thence  1  went  to  Corn- 
wallis.  Some  siunts  there  were  now  set  at  liljortv  from  their 
darkness  and  distress,  wlio  had  been  under  great  trials.  O 
the  sweetness  of  release,  when  the  mourning  soid  has  long- 
been  bowed  down  under  doubts  and  fears,  temptations  and 
trials  ;  and  when  the  blessed  Redeemer,  who  is  their  soul's 
cliief  delight,  stirs  up  hi;,;  kingdom  in  their  hearts,  gives 
them  the  communication  of  divine  grace,  and  comforts  their 
drooping  spu'its  with  the  smiles  of  Heaven.  O  the  huppy 
exchange  from  chains  to  liberty  ;  from  darkness  to  light ; 
from  grief  to  joy  ;  from  mourning  to  rejoicing  ;  from  cap- 
tivity to  victory  :  then  they  can  lean  on  the  breast  of  their 
Beloved,  and  rejoice  in  his  glorious  name.  O  their  is  none 
that  can  tell  the  sweetness  of  his  love,  but  those  that  have 
enjoyed  it. 

O  the  transporting- smiles  of  Jesus' face 
When  he  breaks  in  with  his  redeeming  grace. 
Now  does  the  mourning  soul  leap  and  rejoice, 
Soon  as  they  hear  their  blest  Redeemer's  voice. 
How  soon  with  joy  their  fetter'd  spirits  move 
■  When  they  can  feel  one  spark  of  sacred  love. 


IMAGE  EVALUATION 
TEST  TARGET  (MT-3) 


1.0 


I.I 


1.25 


Ui|28     125 

14    l||||).6 


V] 


<^ 


% 


/a 


0} 


/A 


Photographic 

Sciences 
Corporation 


23  WEST  MAIN  STREET 

WEBSTER,  N.Y.  MS80 

(716)  872-4503 


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iV 


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% 


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\ 


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i^ 


i^ 


^il 


i 


97 


REV.  HENRY   ALLINE  S 


Some  time  when  I  have  a  small  taste  of  redeeming- 
love,  and  find  a  nearness  to  Christ,  I  sec  that  beauty,  and 
find  that  divine  sweetness  in  his  presence,  that  it  seems  as 
if  I  could  not  content  myself  to  live  any  longer  under  such 
clogs  and  imprisonments  :  yet  I  long  to  remain  to  proclaim 
salvation  to  my  fellow-men.  Yea,  I  cannot  say  that  I  have 
such  u  desire  for  deatii  as  for  liberty.  O  liberty,  liberty. 
All  things  that  were  corporeal  seem  a  clog,  and  every  thing 
that  was  dark  airl  sinful  a  strong  chair.  It  seems  so  un- 
reasonable to  live  on  any  thing  but  God  and  so  unprofitable 
to  my  own  soul,  that  1  seem  as  impatient  as  a  wild  bird  in  a 
cage  :  for  the  ligl\t  and  liberty  that  I  have  obtained  makes 
nie  know  myself  and  discover  chains  and  darkness.  ()  how 
often  <.ould  I  say  with  Job,  O  that  I  knew  where  I  could 
find  him,  tivat  I  might  come  even  to  his  seat ;  I  would  order 
my  cause  before  him  and  fill  my  mouth  with  arguments. 
Ah  when  I  get  some  small  intercourse  with  Heaven,  then  I 
l)Lgin  to  see  how  little  I  have,  and  to  open  my  whole  soul 
before  God  as  l)e lore  a  friend,  and  sometimes  when  I  am 
thus  blest,  it  appears  as  if  I  had  almost  obtained  the  victo- 
ry, and,  if  I  could  obtain  a  little  more,  I  should  he  free,  and 
live  in  the  liberty  of  the  gospel,  which  appeared  just  before 
me  ;  but  instead  of  getting  out,  as  I  thought  I  soon  should,  i 
begin  very  unexpectedly  and  almost  very  imperqeptiljly  to 
slip  back  again  into  my  prison  and  chains  ;  and  sometimes- 
I  think,  I  was  not  watchful  enough  ;  and  will  endeavour  the 
next  revival  I  have  to  be  more  engaged  and  certain  to  hold 
it :  and  when  it  comes  sometimes,  I  am  so  attached  to  the 
present  enjoyments,  that  i  think  notiiing  about  losing  it, 
until  it  is  gone  ;  and  when  I  attempt  to  watch,  I  perhaps 
watch  i.i  my  own  strength,  until  I  have  watched  it  all  away* 
O  what  a  mystery  I  am  to  myself! 

August  t'.e  28th,  I  left  Cornwallis  and  went  to  Hor- 
ton  and  remained  there  preaching  and  visiting  my  friends* 
Some  were  inquiring  after  the  blessed  Jesus.  ButO  what 
little  inquiring;  was  there  to  what  we  might  imagine.  O 
the  insensil^ility  of  the  fallen  world,  slumbering  away  the 
inoinents  of  proliation  like  the  beasts.  How  many  thou- 
sands are  there  in  the  world,  that  from  year's  end  to  year's 
end  without  asking  themselvcs^what  they  are,  where  they 
are  bound  to,  where  they  are  from,  or  where  they  soon  will 
be.  Although  their  everlasting  concerns  are  dependent  on 
these  few  fleeting  moments.     How  alarming  would  it  be  if 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


n 


jdeeming- 
auty,  and 
seems  as 
nder  such 
►  proclaim 
lat  I  have 
Yy  liberty. 
very  thing 
ns  so  un- 
iprofttablc 
d  bird  in  a 
led  makes 
s.  ()  how 
re  I  could 
oiild  order 
irguments. 
ven, then  1 
whole  soul 
/hen  I  am 

the  victo- 
le  free,  and 
I  just  before 
)n  should,  1 
qeptiUy  to 

sometimes 
leavour  the 
ain  to  hold 
•bed  to  the 
losin<5  it, 

I  perhaps 

it  all  away* 

;nt  to  Hor- 
[ny  friends* 
iutO  what 
lagine.  O 
away  the 
liany  thou- 
lid  to  year's 
Ivvhere  they 
ly  soon  Avill 
Ipendent  on 
3uld  it  be  if 


I 


some  angel  was  to  inform  them  of  tlie  fall  of  a  new  made 
angelic  glol)e  v/ith  all  its  innumerable  inhabitants.  How 
great  would  be  our  anxiety  for  a  possibility  of  their  recov- 
ery. But  how  much  more  affecting  would  be  the  next  in- 
formation by  an  angel  that  a  way  of  recovery  was  opened 
for  them  by  the  gift  of  God  himself  to  their  fuUen  state,but 
was  disregarded  and  rejected  by  them  for  years  and  ycM'Si 
while  he  wassufiering  in  their  streets,  in  making  use  of  ev- 
ery possible  metiiod  to  get  an  admittance  with  his  oflered 
grace.  O  how  would  it  awake  hi  our  hearts  ten  thousand 
queries,  fears,  griefs,  resentment  and  ardent  longings  too 
big  to  be  contained,  and  too  confused  to  be  expressed  or 
regulated,  and  incupal)le  of  producing  advice,  or  prosecu- 
ting the  result.  And  thus,  O  thus  and  te?»  thousand  times 
more  and  worse  than  cur.  be  expressed,  or  even  conceived, 
is  the  state  and  conduct,  and  unfathomable  mis(M-y  of  the  in- 
habitants of  this  moit.il  world.  O  astonishing,  astonishing  ! 
Can  it  be  that  immortal  souls,  uplieldfrom  tht-ir  own  self-tor- 
menting despair,  and  tiiat  b  '  the  bleeding  hand  of  an  incar-» 
nate  God,  invited,  alarme  1,  persuaded,  intreatjd  and  woo- 
ed by  all  the  expressions  and  endearing  charms  of  the  heav- 
enly Comforter  to  flee  to  the  arms  of  self-existent  love,  and 
take  up  xn  everlasting  al)ode  in  the  realms  of  eternal  bliss, 
and  yet  asleep,  or  rise  in  opposition  to  all  that  has  been  or 
can  be  done,  and  all  this  while  all  the  miseries  of  an  eternity 
of  exquisite  tortures  and  keen  despair  are  threating  every 
breath  to  engulf  the  unguarded  throng  ?  Christ  bleeding, 
dying,  rising ;  the  Holy  Spirit  striving,  hell  threatening 
and  the  wide  extended  gates  of  heaven  waiting  to  receive 
the  self-condemned  and  self-tormented  to  eternal  joy.  And 
yet  O  must  it  be  said,  that  the  fallen  world  is  sleeping, 
musing,  rejecting,  fighting  and  opposing  all  the  endearing 
charms,  cutting,  chaining,  tormenting  and  plunging  them- 
selves down  deeper  and  deeper  into  the  bottomless  gulf  of 
irrevocable  despair.  O  the  wretched  state  of  mankind  ! 
Ah  I  how  low  are  they  fallen,  and  what  a  miserable  con- 
dition are  they  in,  and  exposed  to  encreasing  misery  for 
ever.  Sometimes  when  I  have  a  small  sense  of  man's 
wretched  state  ;  O  how  my  heart  akes,  and  what  shall  I  say, 
or  what  shall  I  do  ?  It  is  God  only  that  can  help  them  ;  yes 
and  would  help  them,  if  they  would  receive  his  help  j  but 
they  love  darkness  rather  than  lijfht. 


H 


RhV.  MENRY  AI.I.TKe's 


I  I 


A" 


Jcsvis,  extend  thy  arms  of  prare  .    '.-  *  •♦ 

To  save  the  poor  unhappy  ruc^'.  ,*  ^  •   '* 

O  pluck  them  from  the  gates  of  hell, 

Til  at  ihey  may  yet  in  glory  dwell. 
Thp;  1st  of  September  I  set  out  for  Annapolis  county 
with  warm  desires  to  spread  the  Redeemer's  kingdom,  and 
as  it  is  Ciod  that  gives  those  longing  desires,  they  cannot  be 
wholly  in  vain,  nor  utterly  lost.  And  ()  I  thought  I  could 
say  many  times  when  going  from  place  to  place  to  pro- 
claim the  Redeemer's  name,  that  I  could  freely  give  up 
soul  and  body  for  that  end,  and  let  mc  meet  with  what  op- 
position I  might  from  any  quarter  whatever,  if  God  was 
with  me,  I  regarded  it  not,  and  could  find  a  longing  desire 
to  be  for  God  only,  and  to  be  spent  for  the  good  of  souls. 
Yea  and  although  my  trials  were  great  from  various  quar- 
ters, yp t  1  would  not  exchange  stations  of  life  with  the 
greatest  Monarch  on  the  Globe.  O  wliat  sweetness  do  I 
often  find  in  the  greatest  storms,  when  I  find  my  Jesui 
nigh. 

Let  all  the  siorms  of  earth  engage^  ,    .     ,- 

And  hell  with  her  infernal  rage  ; 

I  can  their  threat'nings  all  defy, 

Long  MS  I  find  my  Jesus  nigh. 
O  THAT  I  could  lean  upon  him  all  my  days,  and  feel  a 
sense  of  his  love  and  presence,  that  I  might  be  humble  at 
his  feet  and  his  great  name  exalted.  Lord  Jesus,  I  cannot 
live  without  thee  :  nothing,  nothing  but  thyself  can  make 
me  happy  ;  for  thou  art  all  in  all.  O  be  with  me,  be  with 
me,  wherever  I  go,  and  give  me  much  of  thy  Spirit,  to 
make  me  faithful  in  thy  glorious  cause  ;  Lord,  let  me  be 
thine  for  ever. 

September  5th.  I  went  down  to  Granville,  where  X 
preached,  and  found  the  work  of  God  still  reviving.  But 
when  I  speak  of  the  work  reviving,  I  am  astonished.  I 
stand  aghast,  that  I  am  not  more  affected  for  wha«.  I  see  ; 
and  no  more  alarmed  because  I  see  no  more.  How,  O 
how  can  I  sleep  and  slumber,  when  I  as  much  believe,  as 
I  believe  I  have  a  being,  that  if  the  last  trumpet  were  this 
moment  to  sound  the  dreadful  peal,  that  not  only  the  great- 
est part  of  the  world  of  mankind,  which  I  never  saw,  but 
even  of  those  with  whom  I  labour,  converse,  eat  and  drink* 
would  in  an  instant  of  time  awake  blasphemers  in  hell  ?  Lord 
God, pity  the  souls  thou  hast  made,  and  shake  them,  O  shake 
them  by  judgments  or  mercies  to  a  sense  of  their  misera* 


^  r 


rouiuy 
m,  and 
mot  be 
[  could 
to  pro- 
ive  up 
hat  op- 
)d  yv'ds 
;  desire 
:  souls, 
s  quar- 
ith  the 
ss  do  I 
'  JesuSk 


d  feel  a 
ble  at 
cannot 
make 
e  with 
irit,  to 
me  be 

^here  T 
But 

kd.     I 
I  see  ; 

low,  O 

ive,  as 

re  this 

great- 

r,  but 

drinkt 

I?  Lord 
shake 
iisera« 


♦.     *       •     '     ••'         LIF£   AND  JOURNAL.  *  Vo 

blc,  lost  coiuiilion,  before  the  mediatoiial  hour  is  past.  Save 

Ihem,  save  them,  O  thou  mighty  C^od  ot  Jacob. 

Gird  on,  O  Prince  of  Peace,  thy  gospel  sword, 
Ride  in  the  chariot  of  thy  sacred  word. 
,       From  land  lo  laud,  thro'  every  nation  tread, 
To  raise  immortal  spirits  from  the  dead. 

O  THAT  God  would  make  mc,  even  me  a  Morthless 
worm,  instrumental  in  calling  many  soiils  liomc  to  (iod  ! 
O  that  I  might  spend,  and  be  spent  in  proclaiming  the  ever- 
lasting gospel,  and  that  many  souls  migi^t  for  ever  cast 
their  crowns  at  his  feet,  and  raise  irnu'iorta)  lionotu's  to  his 
glorious  name  for  blessings  sent  them  by  :ny  stammering 
tongue.  Atthistimelsawtlie  greatest  society  that  1  ever  had 
seen  in  Aiui*«polis  ;  more  nvmibers  joined  the  church  and 
many  dinners  under  conviction,  inquiring  vvb.at  they  mi>st 
do  to  be  saved,  and  the  christians  rejoicing  in  their  Redeem- 
er. O  that  Jesus  would  still  go  on  to  revive  his  kingdom 
in  the  hearts  of  the  sons  of  men,  that  they  may  be  redeem- 
ed from  eternal  death,  and  in  his  everlasting  love.  liul  I 
have  reason  likewise,  and  more  so,  to  say,  O  that  the  sons 
of  men  would  receive  him  :  for  there  is  nothing  in  Ck)d  to 
keep  sinners  from  redeeming  love  and  everlasting  joy ; 
neither  is  it  possible  for  him  to  with -hold  any  good  thing 
from  any  good  creature  that  will  recieve  it.  God  being 
infinite  in  love  and  compassion  flows  from  his  goodness  to 
every  empty  vessel.  But  as  the  weeds  that  turn  from  the 
sun  grow  sour,  so  any  creature,  angel  or  man  that  turns 
from  God,  grows  dark, malicious  and  miserable.  O  the 
danger  and  deplorable  condition  of  turning  from  God.  O 
how  has  the  thought  of  a  separate  state  fix)m  God  racked 
my  very  soul :  especially  when  I  see  the  overflowing  good- 
ness of  the  Divine  Being,  that  would  fain  make  them  hap- 
py, even  all  that  will  be  happy.  And  against  this,  yea  all 
this,  O  how  many  thousands  are  miserable  ;  considering 
that  it  is  against  so  much  love  and  condescension.  O  the 
cutting  reflections  of  losing  all  happiness  and  enduring  all 
misery  of  choice.  When  I  take  a  small  view  of  these 
things  and  man's  miserable  condition,  and  consider  where 
we  are  from,  what  we  now  are,  and  what  wc  must  soon 
be,  O  how  does  my  soul  awake  with  surprise,  and  labour 
under  the  weighty  consideration,  and  groan  for  myself  and 
fellow-men.  O  howdollamentandrepentman'sfirstrebellion 
and  fall,  and  long  that  they  may  be  redeemed.    O  how  does 


!     A 


!)6 


RtV.  HfctJRY  ALLINE  S 


I  1 


my  soul  pant  for  the  spreading  of  the  blessed  gospel,  and 
the  impressmg  the  name  of  the  blessed  Jesus  on  the  hearts 
of  thousands  :  especially  when  I  have  a  small  view  of  the 
miserable  ct/.dition  of  the  souls  that  are  out  of  Christ,  and 
the  unspeakable  misery  that  awaits  them.  O  what  happy 
hours  do  I  find  when  I  can  lean  upon  Christ  by  a  lively  faith, 
and  feel  the  impressions  of  God*s  blessed  name,  and  the 
power  of  hi>s  redeeming  spirit  on  my  soul :  but  if  not ,  C) 
how  distressing  and  unhappy  I  waste  my  golden  hours  and 
days.  And  O  the  sudden  changes  of  my  mind.  One  hour 
I  can  preach,  pray  or  discourse  with  my  soul  at  liberty,  and 
warmed  with  divine  love  ;  vnvi  the  next  hour  all  that  1  say 
or  do  feels  dry  and  barren,  and  my  soul  fightii>g  in  a  stoim 
with  the  current  of  the  world,  the  flesh  and  the  devil  a- 
gainst  mc. 

Great  blessings  attended  my  preaching  through 
Maugerville  on  the  river  St,  Johns,  where  1  had  now  ar- 
rived, especially  among  the  christians.  The  church  seem- 
ed greatly  revived,  ti'avelling  in  love  ;  some  were  added  to 
the  churchy  and  some  poor  sinners  awakened  :  and  I  still 
found  (blessed  be  God)  a  longing  desire  to  spread  the  bles- 
sed name  of  my  blessed  Master.  O  Lord  Jesus,  grant  a 
double  portion  of  thy  blessed  spirit.  Yea,  Lord,  what  doth 
my  soul  so  much  long  for  ? 

Not  all  the  riches  of  the  mortal  staje, 
Could  half  so  much  my  soul  engage. 

Some  time  in  the  last  November  I  came  down  to  the 
mouth  of  the  river  St.  Johns,  and  was  obliged  to  stay  some 
time  there,  waiting  for  a  passage.  I  preachedamong  the  peo- 
ple there,  and  spent  all  the  time  I  could  with  my  pen  ;  and 
enjoyed  some  happy  hours  while  1  was  there,  almost  every 
day.  But  considering  how  I  am  indulged,  I  am  a  faithless 
vine  ;  for  I  have  all  that  I  need  in  this  world,  God  goes  with 
me  and  preserves  me  by  sea  and  by  land,  both  night  and 
day,  and  yet  how  little  is  my  heart  affected  therewith.  How 
little  is  my  soul  drawn  out  to  love  him  who  gave  his  life 
for  me.  Sometimes  I  have  thought  I  could  not  contain  my- 
self any  longer  so  far  from  Got'.  I  was  like  a  restless  crea- 
ture in  prison.  But  ah,  fallen  asleep  again  in  some  de- 
gree, and  do  not  wrestle  as  I  ought.  O  that  God  would 
make  me  useful  to  those  people,  that  they  might  receive 
some  blessings  from  God  by  me,  and  O  that  he  would  re- 
ward them  for  their  kindness  to  me.    But  ah,  I  fear  man/ 


LIFE  AND    JCL'RNAL. 


•f 


el,  and 
b  hearts 
of  the 
i&t.  and 
.  happy 
ly  faith, 
and  the 
not,  C) 
>urs  and 
ine  hour 
rty,  and 
at  1  say 
a  stoi m 
devil  a- 

tli  rough 
now  ar- 
:h  seenv* 
added  to 
d  1  still 
the  bles- 
grant  a 
lat  doth 


to  the 
ly  some 
the  peo- 
t;n  ;  and 
it  every 
aithless 
)es  with 
ght  and 
How 
his  life 
in  my- 
ss  crea- 
me  de- 
would 
receive 
luld  rC" 
man/ 


of  them  willlose  all  their  reward,  because  they  have  not  a 
principle  of  divine  love  m  their  soul. 

Novp:mber  the  25th,  1  landed  in  Cornwallis.  O  that 
I  was  suitably  affected  of  the  kindness  of  God  with  me. 
How  nuich  have  1  seen  of  his  care  over  me,  and  yet  how 
little  do  1  love  him.  He  has  been  with  me  by  night  and  by 
day,  by  sea  and  by  land,  has  guarded  and  supported  my 
body,  fed  and  encouraged  my  soul,  and  often  blest  my  la- 
bours for  the  good  of  others.  O  that  I  could  live  under  a 
continual  sense  of  his  goodness,  and  be  willing  to  be  any 
thing,  and  to  go  any  where,  that  might  be  for  liis  glory,  my 
good,  and  the  good  of  others.  But  O  the  remains  of  sin 
and  darkness  are  often  like  chains  and  fetters  to  my  soul. 
Gire  me  love  and  humility,  O  my  God. 

The  Sabbath-day  I  preached,  and  the  Lord  was  pleas- 
ed to  come  with  his  spirit  in  a  remarkable  manner  to  mc 
and  others.    I  thought  1  longed  to  proclaim  the  gospel,  that 
I  felt,  from  land  to  land,  and  be  worn  out  in  so  sweet  a  cause. 
Witness,  O  land,  the  goodness  of  my  God  ; 
And  every  creature  spread  his  name  abroad. 
Witness,  ye  silent  arbours,  where  I  rove, 
How  often  there  my  soul  has  found  his  love. 
And  silent  vales  where  lonely  hours  I  trod. 
How  often  I  enjoy'd  the  smiles  of  God. 
Witness,  ye  turifs  of  moss,  where  often  I 
Have  kneelM,  and  found  my  blest  Redeemer  by. 
O  the  sweet  wondtrs  of  that  blood  divine. 
That  makes  all  things,  and  life  immortiJ  mine. 
.•  There  would  I  spend  my  fleeting  hours  in  praise* 

And  never  leave  till  I  shall  see  his  face. 
Let  me  with  Jesus  through  this  desert  rove 
Till  I  shall  be  in  the  bright  worlds  above, 
Where  nothing  shall  be  known  to  break  my  love. 

November  the  28th,  I  went  with  a  number  of  the 
brethren  from  Cornwallis  to  Horton  to  meet  the  churches 
of  Horton  and  Falmouth  there,  in  order  to  settle  some  mat 
ters  in  dispute,  to  heal  breaches,  and  make  up  divisions. 
There  seemed  to  be  a  desire  for  unity  in  many  ;  but  some 
were  so  stiff  in  non-essentials,  that  they  were  not  willing  to 
walk  with  those  that  differed  from  them  in  those  matters. 
O  that  christians  would  bear  and  forbear  I  And  what  for- 
bearance is  there  if  we  cannot  walk  with  those  that  differ 
with  us  in  some  non-essential  points.  For  my  own  part  I 
have  always  been  very  positive  ever  since  I  knew  the  differ* 

I 


] 


98 


REV.   UENUV  ALLINt's 


ence  between  the  form  and  power  of  religion,  not  to  receive 
or  walk  with  any  as  christians  that  had  not  known  a  work  of 
grace  in  their  souls,  or  had  not  a  living  Christ  in  their  souls  ; 
for  which  I  have  often  been  called  censorious,  and  unchari- 
table ;  but  I  desire  no  charity  without  grounds.  But  as  for 
any  difference  in  non-essential  matters  or  the  externals  of 
religion,  they  never  were,  iTor  I  hope,  ever  will  be  any  bar 
to  me  in  walking  or  communing  with  those  I  believe  to  be 
followers  of  the  Lamb  in  sincerity  and  in  truth  ;  and  have 
the  life  of  religion,  although  they  might  differ  from  me 
in  many  small  matters :  for  if  Jesus  loves  them,  and  bears 
with  what  they  call  errors  in  judgment,  why  should  poor 
man  reject  or  call  that  common  or  unclean,  which,  I  really 
believe,  Christ  has  cleansed.  Yea,  were  we  to  take  all  our 
externals  of  religion,  all  our  principles  and  tenets,  which 
were  even  according  to  the  letter  of  the  word,  without  a 
living  Saviour,  what  would  they  all  avail  ?  Yea,  put  all  that 
ever  was  known  or  done  by  man,  without  the  Spirit  of  God 
in  one  scale,  and  the  scanty  love  and  humility  of  a  poor  ig- 
norant, broken  hearted  christian  (that  seems  to  know  no- 
thing about  any  principles)  and  it  would  so  far  overbalance 
the  other,  as  to  enter  the  gates  of  heaven)  reach  the  heart 
of  the  kingdom  of  glory,  while  the  other  with  all  his  prin- 
ciples would  be  driven  al)out  in  the  wmd  like  the  smoke  of 
Cain's  unaccepted  sacrifice.  O  that  every  christian  would 
remember  that  command  of  their  blessed  Lord  and  Mas- 
ter, and  comply  therewith.  Labour  (saith  he)  not  for  the 
meat  that  perisheth,  but  for  that  meat  that  endureth  to  ever- 
lasting life.  What  are  all  the  externals  of  religion  without 
the  power,  and  the  love  of  the  living  God  ?  And  when  they 
enjoy  that  love,  it  makes  all  things  right.  If  it  is  love  that 
fulfils  the  law,  and  nothing  but  love,  O  love  him,  love  him, 
ye  followers  of  the  Lord,  and  then,  O  then  you  will  sinceri- 
ly  love  one  another. 

About  the  Jtst  of  December  I  went  to  Falmouth, 
found  the  christians  well  ti  avelling  in  love  and  unity.  I  re- 
mained a  short  season  with  them,  had  many  happy  hours, 
and  our  hearts  were  in  some  degree  knit  together  like  Da- 
vid and  Jonathan's.  I  preached  and  conversed  with  them, 
and  then  went  to  Halifax  to  commit  a  small  piece  of  my 
writings  to  the  press.  O  the  trials  I  went  through  there 
to  see  the  darkness  and  death  of  that  great  throng  of  peo- 
ple, and  no  door  to  proclaim  the  |;ospel,  as  my  toul  longed 


J:: 


LIKE  AVD  JOURNAL. 


99 


receive 
mrk  of 
souls ; 
nchari- 
t  as  for 
nals  of 
my  bar 
t  to  be 
d  have 
)m  me 
d  bears 
d  poor 
[  really 
all  our 
,  which 
thout  a 
all  that 
of  God 
)oor  ig- 
low  no- 
balance 

heart 
IS  prin- 
»oke  of 

would 

Mas- 
ter the 
|o  ever- 

ithout 

;n  they 

Ive  that 

yt  him, 

iinceri- 

louth} 

I  rc- 

I  hours, 

Le  Da- 

them, 

|of  my 

there 

pco- 

mged 


to  do  it.  O  with  what  joy  would  I  labour  night  and  day, 
if  I  might  be  the  means  of  awakening  some  of  their  pre- 
cious and  immortal  souls,  and  bring  them  to  Christ.  <) 
Jesus,  send  me,  send  me  in  thy  blessed  name  to  the  dying 
world.  Give  me,  O  Lord,  for  my  portion  to  spend  and  be 
spent  in  thy  vineyard,  and  bring  many  souls  to  the  knowl- 
edge of  thyself.  After  I  had  committed  my  writing  to  the 
press,  1  returned  to  Falmouth. 

About  the  loth  of  December  I  rode  to  Horton,  and 
met  the  church,  and  a  blessed  day  it  was  to  my  soul  wliilj 
proclaiming  the  gospel,  awd  many  of  the  christians  were  re- 
joicing in  their  Gc  !,  and  telling  the  wonders  of  his  love. 
O  the  sweet  moments  and  happy  days,  that  I  have  seen  iu 
the  house  of  God  among  the  christians,  a  'lappincss  that 
the  world  knows  nothing  of.  Well  might  the  proplict  say, 
He  would  rather  be  a  doorkeeper  in  the  house  of  God,  tlian 
to  dwell  in  the  tents  of  wickedness.  O  let  my  never-jnd- 
ing  portion  be  among  that  people,  whose  God  is  the 
Lord  J  let  their  God  be  my  God,  and  their  joys  be  my  joys. 

0  let  me  live,  O  let  me  reign, 

'    .  With  those  that  do  my  Jesus  love  : 

1  count  no  other  portion  gain, 
And  long  to  meet  them  all  above. 

I  REMAINED  in  Horton  preaching  in  various  places, 
and  the  Lord  was  with  me,  and  often  gave  me  so  much  of 
his  presence,  as  lifted  me  up"  above  the  world.  The  next 
week  I  went  to  Newport,  where  I  met  the  church  and 
communed  with  them.  I  enjoyed  some  happy  hours  tlicre, 
but  passed  through  some  distressing  moments  under  a 
sense  of  hardness  of  heart  and  stupidity  of  mind.  The 
next  morning  I  awoke  very  early,  and  was  thinking  about 
the  important  scenes  of  the  day  4)efore.  Although  I  had 
then  much  freedom  and  great  blessings  ;  yet  when  I  came 
to  look  back  upon  it,  I  found  I  was  so  little  affected,  had  so 
little  profittcd,  was  so  little  humbled, so  little  filled  with  Icve 
to  God  for  his  grace,  that  it  all  appeared  almost  one  un- 
mixed evil,  and  not  fit  to  be  seen  or  looked  upon  by  a  God 
of  holiness  and  purity.  O  how  full  of  sin  did  all  my  devo- 
tion appesrr,  especially  when  I  saw  in  whose  presence  I 
was,  and  what  I  was  then  doing.  I  was  not  only  the!> 
preaching  the  everlasting  gospel  of  the  Kiilid om  of  Glory, 
on  which  hangs  the  eternal  state  of  all  the  sons  of  men, 
^d  ought  to  awake  every  heart  to  receive  it,  but  likewise 


I'M 


i 


100 


KHV.  HENRY  ALLTNt'S 


rcprcscntinp;  the  most  «iolemn,  the  most  aflecting,  and  the 
luo&t  inii^oitant  scene  that  ever  \vill  be  seen  hy  angels  or 
men  :  even  the  broken  body  of  an  incarnate  God,  God  and 
man  on  Calvary's  Mount,  bleeding  and  dying  for  the  sins 
of  tlie  fallen  race.  O  astonishing,  and  I  no  more  cngs^ed) 
uo  more  afl'ected  I 

About  the  2 1st  of  December  I  went  to  Horton.  The 
lord  gave  me  great  freedom  in  proclaiming  the  everlasting 
gospel.  But  O  what  a  wonder  is  it,  that  I  say,  I  believe 
that  the  infinite  (iod  goes  with  me,  and  assists  me  to  pro- 
claim these  trutiis,  which  eternally  concerns  all  the  sons  of 
men,  and  that  I  am  no  more  affected  I  Can  He  that  rules 
self-existent  and  unchangeably  condescend  to  stoop  so  low  ? 
O  shall  he,  before  whom  angels  and  archangels  bend  with 
reverence  and  humility  ;  yea,  before  whom  millions  and 
millions  of  worlds  are  as  a  grain  of  sand,  be  ever  engaged 
for  the  welfare  of  such  a  miserable  wretch  as  I  am,  and  at- 
tend my  faithful  labours  in  the  gospel,  and  I  have  no  more 
gratitude  ?  O  death,  darkness  and  ingratitude  !  The  very 
rocks  would  melt  with  gratitude  at  what  I  profess  to  be- 
lieve. Sometimes  (although  I  enjoy  much  of  God  at 
times)  I  have  seen  such  a  disproportion  between  what  I 
am,  and  what  I  ought  to  be,  or  between  what  I  profess  to 
believe  and  what  I  feel,  that  I  have  been  almost  ready  to 
say,  that  it  was  all  only  the  force  of  imagination.  But  yet, 
O  blessed  God,  there  is  a  reality,  and  although  the  chris- 
tians  are  imprisoned,  while  in  this  mortal  state,  yet  they 
have  that  acquaintance  and  enjoyment  of  God,  that  the 
world  knows  nothing  of,  and  will  certainly  advance  in  their 
victory  of  death,  sin  and  self  more  and  more,  till  th«y  have 
landed  far  beyond  the  reach  of  all  these  chains  and  disor- 
ders. 

God  will  indulge  his  children  with  his  hand 
To  lead  them  sate  thro'  all  this  desort  land, 
And  then  will  call  them  from  this  mortal  shore 
To  realms  of  light,  where  death  is  known  no  more. 

O  THE  stupidity,  blindness  and  miserable  condition  the 
world  is  in  !  how  is  it  possible  that  men,  whose  seuls  are 
to  exist  for  ever,  either  in  happiness  or  misery,  can  be  so 
careless  and  unconcerned,  as  if  they  were  all  devoted  to  their 
several  places,  and  doomed  to  their  happiness  or  miseries 
by  some  irresistible,  arbitrary  decree  without  the  use  of  any 
u^eans ;  or  whether  they  embraced  a  Saviour  or  net.    An4 


id  the 
els  or 
xl  and 
le  sins 
vaged, 

The 

luAting 
jelicve 
to  pro- 
sons  of 
t  rules 
olow  ? 
id  with 
•ns  and 
jgaged 
and  at- 
D  more 
le  very 
to  be- 
;od  at 
what  I 
>fess  to 
;ady  to 
ut  yet, 

chris- 

It  they 

at  the 

In  their 

y  have 

disor- 


LIPK   AND  JOURNAL. 


:ui 


lion  the 

lis  are 

be  so 

lo  their 

liseries 

of  any 

An4 


how  much  more  inconsistent  with  truth,  aiul  cruel  to  their 
own  eternal  state  do  they  con(Uict,  when  they  aie  indulged 
with  a  few  moments  of  probation  out  of  clerical  now,  aiid 
the  means  of  their  salvation  inseparable  with  the  emis,  ail 
the  woi  Id  fallen  and  condemned  and  undone  ;  with  redeem- 
ing love  all  around  them  ;  destruction  beneath  them  ;  liie 
avenj^er  of  blood  pursuing  and  mercy  inviti'K;  them  ;  liie 
Spirit  of  God  striving  with  them, and  the  Kcdeemer  sayng 
to  them,  He  that  belicveth  shall  be  saved,  and 'he  that  be- 
lieveth  not  shall  be  damned  :  and  yet  poor  man  sleeps  aw?.y 
his  hours  of  probation  ;  those  few  moments  on  which  turns. 
the  scale  of  his  everlasting  fate  ;  or  is  careless  and  uncon- 
cerned, as  if  there  was  nothing  more  than  the  loss  or  price 
of  some  empty  shadow  at  stake:  although  the  happiness 
on  the  one  hand  is  infinitely  unspeakable,  and  the  misery 
<on  the  other  hand  inexpressibly  intolerable,  and  both  c* car- 
nal and  unalterable.  And  these  few  moments  are  all  tlie 
time  that  ever  he  will  have  through  the  endless  ages  of  e- 
ternity  to  embrace  the  one  ?nd  escape  the  other.  I)  auKiz- 
ing,  amazing  !  And  yet  the  greatest  part  of  the  world,  and 
many  of  those  who  profess  to  believe  these  things  squander 
away  day  after  day,  month  after  month,  and  year  after  year, 
eating  and  drinking,  sleeping  and  waking,  laugl.ing  and 
Jestinjj,  in  all  manner  of  vain  amusements,  sinful  pleasures, 
and  insignificant  employments  as  stupid  and  careless  as  the 
very  beasts;  until  thousands  and  tens  of  thousands  cfrop 
out  of  all  pcjssibility  of  redemption  into  keen  despair. 

A  BOUT  the  2'5th  of  December  I  went  to  Cornwallis,  and 
remained  thereuntil  the  1st  of  January.  I  preached  oflin 
there  among  the  people,  and  found  many  of  the  chrisiiaiis 
very  lively  in  religion,  but  there  remained  still  some  dis- 
putes between  the  baptists  and  congregationals  about  wa* 
ter-baptism.  Many  hours  were  very  unprofiiably  spont  by ' 
some  of  the  christians,  contending  abov't  it.  O  the  infinite 
goodness  of  Ciod  to  bear  the  infirmities  of  his  childrer.. 
How  much  tradition,  superstition  and  idolatry  do  we  beur 
about  us,  yet  he  loves  us,  often  man'fcsting  his  presence  : 
jea,  I  am  convinced  so  great  is  God*8  love  and  compassion 
to  the  fallen  world,  that  he  will  leave  no  stone  unturned  to 
bring  them  to  eternal  rest  j  and  does  often  bless  christi.ius 
of  different  sentiments  ;  not  only  to  teach  us  a  spirit  o;  K}i;- 
bearance;^  but  likewise  to  manifest  his  infinite  love  and  re;v 

13 


III 


102 


Her*  BtRKY  allinbS 


I 


tl      i 


1 

]< 

i 

., 

L 

' 

diness  to  forgive.  It  is  a  great  degree  of  darknesi  and  self- 
conccil  that  we  are  possessed  of,  when  we  imaf»ine  that  Ciod 
will  not  bless  any  people  with  his  spirit  and  love,  who  dif- 
fer* with  us  in  non-essentials.  ()  the  great  goodness  and 
forbearance  of  Gotl  to  his  children.  Who  can  but  love 
him  for  his  condescension  and  kindness.  Although  we  arc 
full  of  all  manner  of  wickedness  and  disorders  while  passing 
through  this  world,  yet  his  love  is  so  gi*eat,  that  he  give* 
U''  his  presence  and  his  smiles,  which  are  worth  ten  thous- 
and  worlds.  Yea,  saith  the  prophet,  In  all  their  afflictions 
he  was  afflicted,  and  the  angel  of  his  presence  preserved 
them.  Sometimes  I  had  suth  a  sense  of  his  goodness, 
that  1  wondered  all  the  world  did  not  love  him  ;  and  long- 
ed to  have  more  liberty  in  my  own  soul  from  darkness  and 
unbelief,  that  I  might  proclaim  his  love  and  goodness.  Yea, 
sometimes  I  almost  wish  to  be  dissolved,  to  be  where  I 
might  love  and  praise  him  without  any  fetters  or  interpos- 
ing clouds  :  for  it  seems  as  if  it  only  marred  and  degraded 
the  goodness  of  God,  when  I  attempt  to  speak  of  it  here  in 
this  imprisoned  and  corrupted  state.  Well  ;  the  time  is 
coming)  if  I  belong  to  the  spiritual  house  of  Israel,  and  have 
known  the  Redeemer's  love  in  my  heart,  that  I  shall  share 
in  the  glorious  liberty  of  the  sons  of  God  and  rejoice  for 
ever,  where  sin  and  death  are  known  no  more.  O  is  it  my 
lot,  is  it  my  lot  ?  Shall  I  one  day  rejoice  with  those  whose 
God  is  the  Lord,  and  sin  and  sorrow  no  more  ?  O  the  un- 
speakable joys  of  the  upper  world  !  One  glimpse  of  it 
makes  my  heart  rejoice  even  while  in  this  rmprisoned  state. 
O  I  am  lost  with  wonder  and  joy,  when  I  think  what  great 
things  God  will  do  for  them  that  love  him.  O  a  never  end- 
ing eternity  of  joy  for  them.  But  O  the  unhappy  state  of  the 
wicked  !  How  little  happiness  do  they  enjoy  even  in  this 
world.  How  much  grief,  pain  and  trouble  do  they  undergo. 
They  toil,  labour  and  dig,  turn  and  twist  to  find  some  rest 
and  happiness,  but  find  none  ;  there  stdl  remains  an  uneasi- 
ness within.  Yea  the  most  hardened  wretches  in  the  world) 
when  distressing  hours  come,  and  death  stares  them  in  the 
&ce,  tu-e  racked  with  distressing  fears  and  dreadful  ex- 
pectations. The  fears  of  death  and  destruction  will  threat- 
en and  alarm  them  at  times,  although  at  other  time«  thej 
seem  ever  so  easy  and  quiet  in  their  minds. 

Whv  precioni  souls,  why ,  why,  unguarded  thuf, 
leict  with  foes  from  hell  on  every  side 


LirS  AKD  JOUKNaL. 


103 


id  scir- 
at  (iod 
ho  diP. 
ss  and 
It  love 
we  arc 
)assing 
;  give* 

thous- 
lictions 
jstrved 
odntss, 
i  long- 
ess  and 
s.  Yea, 
^hcre  I 
iterpos- 
;  graded 

here  in 
time  is 

« 

nd  have 
11  share 
>ice  for 
is  it  my 
:  whose 
the  un- 
se  of  it 
ed  state, 
it  great 
rer  end- 
:e  of  the 
in  this 
ndergo. 
me  rest 
uneasi- 
e  world, 
n  in  the 
dful  ex- 
l  thr^at- 
eB  thej 


Insulting  thy  short  hours  of  broken  peace  : 
Why,  wasting  momenti*  bought  witli  blo<Kl  divine, 
In  quest  of  that  which  hut  au^nients  thy  (^rict. 
Wliy  pre»t  with  sorrows  ;  knd  thy  little  bark, 
Of  mortal  life,  that  floats  so  near  the  gulf 
So  much  exposM,  invaded  ev'ry  hour 
While  that  blc»t  hand  (and  must  1  say  that  hlcad) 
That  snans  the  realms  immense,  that  liolds  wiih  l(>ve« 
^     Seraphic  millions  in  their  sacred  flam?, 

Stretch'd  from  the  realms  of  self-existent  love 
To  guard  thy  life,  thy  foes  defeat,  redeem 
From  death's  dark  vault,  attract  with  joys  divine. 
And  lead  to  the  realms  of  uncreated  light ; 
Where  pleasure  reigns  uninsuhed  with  fcnr. 
And  far,  yea  far  from  changes,  loss  or  night. 
O  why  immortal  spark,  why,  why  refuse 
Unmingled  joys,  to  court  eternal  pain  ? 
"Vhy  hug  sad  hours  of  fear  and  deep  distress, 
•     And  disregard  the  joys  of  endless  day. 

Why  wear  thy  chains  in  dungeons  dark  before 
Angelic  freedom  and  immortal  crowns. 
Leave,  leave  O  urdiappy  wanderers  that  sue 
For  joys  within  this  mortal  urb.     O  leave 
Those  stars  delusive  for  tke  Ntar  that  leads, 
from  dark  abodes  to  th*  uncreated  sun  : 
Leave  death,  fear,  foes,  dark  and  slavish  chains 
For  Jesus  (tho  despis'd)  and  all  his  realms 
Of  sacred  love  and  glories  uncreate. 
And  may  I  see  you  there,  O  there  with  him. 
That  spake  all  worlds  to  move  ;  and  join,  O  join 
With  countless  seraphs  in  immortal  songs 
In  love  eternal  as  the  God  himself. 
Another  year  is  drawn  to  a  period,  and  O  what  have 
I  done,  what  advance  have  I  made  in  the  only  thing  for 
which  I  have  my  being  ?   How  many  thousands  have  land- 
ed in  the  eternal  world  since  this  year  commenced,  whose 
die  is  cast  and  doom  unalterably  fixed,   and  I  am  spared  ? 
But  O  if  I  look  back  on  the  year  past  and  review  my  walk) 
how  dark  and  how  crooked  is  it,  and  how  little  have  I  ad- 
vanced my  Redeemer's  name,  and  how  little  useful  have  I 
been  to  my  fellow-men. 

My  fleeting  years  how  are  they  fled  away 

And  hurry  to  the  grave  without  delay  ; 

Soon,  soon  they'll  plunge  me  from  this  mortal  shore 

To  worlds  where  months  and  years  are  known  Ro  more. 

O  Jesus,  Jesus,  fit  me  for  the  change. 

And  call  me  far  beyond  the  reach  of  painSy 

To  join  with  angels  in  immortal  itraini. 


fii 


104 


REV.  he:*rt  alline's 


IT 

i 


'   •!. 


\  if 

1 

i 

li 

Pr: 

THE  BEGINNING  OF  THE  TEAR   1781. 

Kind  hand  thut  led  nie  through  the  exhausted  ye«r 

And  bid  reluming  earth  once  more  appear. 

But  O  how  much  of  years  and  moments  past, 

Are  to  myself  and  fellow  mortals  lost. 

How  little  have  I  spread  my  Saviour's  praise, 

How  liiile  progress  in  his  sacred  ways. 

O  niiglit  I  now  begin  my  life  anew 

And  bid  my  former  sloth  and  sins  adieu. 

Awake,  O  blessed  God,  awake  my  heart, 

With  every  lust  and  idol  dear  to  part, 

Whatc'er  I  harbour  that  rejects  thy  reign 

My  willing  soul  implores  to  have  them  slain. 

Ah  blessed  God,  whale'er  rejects  thy  grace 

Let  them  be  brought  and  slirtii  before  thy  face.       " 

Ajid  O  inspire  my  soul  with  grace  divine 

That  I  may  be  bf)th  soi.i  and  body  thine. 

And  lead  n  e,  blessed  God,  where'er  I  go, 

With  lieavenly  zeal  the  gospel  trump  to  blow. 

O  send  me,  send  me  in  thy  blessed  name. 

The  glorious  words  of  Jesus  to  proclaim, 

Wliere'er  thovi  cast  my  lot,  where'er  I  rove,. 

Inspire  my  tongue  to  sound  redeeming  love. 

Endow  my  soul  with  meekness  of  the  Laiab 

To  spread  thy  dying,  bleeding,  rising  fame. 

Strip  me  of  self,  and  fill  me  wi»:b  thy  grace, 

To  sound  glad  tidings  to  the  fallen  race. 

Methinks  I  long,  O  blessed  God, to  spread 

Thy  gospel  wonders  to  restore  the  dead. 

Send  me,  O  Go. I,  and  teach  the  blind  to  sec,, 

And  in  thy  name  to  set  the  captives  fr  .e. 

Send  me  with  gospel  cares^unto  the  deaf 

And  Gilead's  Balm  to  give  the  sick  relief. 

Let  me  awake  the  mciPt  unfeeling  race. 

And  comfort  mourners  with  thy  gospel  grace. 

Let  me- proclaim  my  dear  Redeemer*£  charms 

To  lead  his  children  to  their  Saviour's  arms. 

Thy  lambs  unto  thy  bosom  let  me  guide 

And  wounded  spirits  to  thy  bleeding  side. 

Take  me  O  God  into  thy  heavenly  care. 

And  lead  a  worm  thy  goodness  to  declajt, 

Devote  me  in  the  essentials  of  thy  name 

To  spread  ihe  meekness  of  the  bleeding  Lamb. 

Teach  me  to  count  all  earthly  joys  but  loss. 

That  I  may  spread  the  wonders  of  the  cross* 

O  let  me  face  a  frowning  world  with  joy  ; 

Engage  the  powers  nf  darkness  to  destroy. 

And  hoM  me  soft  within  thy  blessed  arms. 

From  earthly  grandeur  and  alluring  charms. 

O  let  me  now  begin  my  days  anew. 

With  joy  thy  gospel  wonders  to  pursue. 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


lOJ 


.»        Enf^g^e  my  soul  to  spread  thy  name  abroad, 
And  give  approaching  moments  to  my  God. 
What  days  to  come,  kind  Heaven  intends  tor  mc, 
My  cheerful  soul,  O  God,  devote  to  thee. 
And  fcverj'  power  of  life  and  soid  engag-e 
By  grace  divine,  while  on  tli.s  mortal  stage  ; 
Then  in  the  last  decline  of  mortal  breath, 
Help  me  with  joy  to  triumph  over  death. 
And  in  my  dying  gi'oans  let  me  proclaim 
The  wonders  of  my  dear  Redeemer's  name. 
O  let  me  tell  to  the  surviving  race 
Redecining  love  and  his  unbounded  grace. 
Then  from  these  changing  scenes  oi  day  and  night 
Let  me  with  sacred  ardour  take  my  flight  ; 
Leanine  my  soul  upon  my  heavenly  friend, 
Find  all  my  labours  and  my  sorrows  end. 
My  soul  redeemed  from  death  and  endless  woe, 
"Will  bid  farewell  to  all  these  scenes  below. 
Cheerful  IMl  reach  the  blest  the  blissful  shore 
Where  sin  and  death  shall  plague  me  never  more. 
There,  there,  with  all  the  glorious  hosts  above, 
My  soul  shall  feast  on  everlasting  love. 
And  live  with  Jesus  on  those  peaceful  plaint 
Where  every  saint  in  love  immortal  reigns. 
O  blessed  Jesus,  shal?  my  portion  be 
Forever  found  bound  up  with  joy  in  thee  ! 
O  shall  I  once  hear  my  Redeemer  say 
Come  happy,  happy  spirit  come  away  i 
Come  home  unto  the  saints*  eternal  rest, 
And  lean  upon  your  great  Redeemer's  brcMt  ? 
O  shall  I,  shall  I,  blessed  Jesus,  reign 
Where  I  shall  never  never  sin  a^ain  ? 
There  endless  ages  on  the  blissful  shore 
Let  me  be  found  thy  goodness  to  adore. 
There  give  my  longing  soul  a  humble  place 
Near  thy  dear  feet,  to  sing  redeeming  grace, 
There  let  me  sound  thine  everlasting  fame  ; 
And  give  the  glory  to  the  slaughter'd  Lamb. 

January,  1781.  This  year  I  intend,  if  Ood  permit, 
to  pen  down  the  travels  of  my  soul  every  day,  which  in  the 
tjme  past  I  have  not  done. 

1st.  In  the  morning  I  enjoyed  happy  moments  with 
my  Lord  and  Master  ;  after  which  I  was  in  great  darkness. 
In  the  evening  I  preached  a  sermon,  I  thought,  und«r 
the  greatest  sense  of  darkness  and  hardness  of  heart, 
that  ever  I  had.  Then  went  to  my  lodgings  under 
the  same  trials  ;  but  about  1 1  o'clock  at  night  I  received  a 
jewel  I  trust  firom  God  on  some  deep  points' of  diirinit]^* 


I'*" 


106 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE*S 


;''(.. 


i 


h 


which  I  hud  Ion"  been  searching  after,  and  which  will  be 
in  some  of  my  writings. 

2d.  This  day  I  left  Com wallis  for  Annapolis.  O  may 
the  Lord  direct  my  ways  this  cay,  and  teach  my  heart  to 
spread  his  worthy  praises.  I  erijoyed  some  blessed  hours 
and  some  darkness.  In  the  evening  just  before  I  came  to 
an  inn,  I  had  a  blessed  visit  to  my  soul.  O  that  I  was 
more  humble  I 

3(1.  O  THE  joyous  moments  of  this  moaning  !  How 
can  my  soul  endure  the  absence  of  my  God.  O  God  de- 
liver me  from  these  storms,  or  make  them  useful  to  my 
soul  and  fellow-men,  as  thou  has  done  trials  before. 

4th.  Blessed  be  God,  he  does  not  leave  his  children 
long  without  some  relief.  In  the  morning  my  «oul  was 
under  great  tribulations,  in  the  evening  leaping  for  joy. 

Ten  thousand  praises  to  this  God  belong", ' 
O  could  I  make  his  goodness  all  my  song  :    ^ 
And  tell  the  world  the  greatness  of  his  care, 
And  bring  my  fellow  men  his  love  to  share. 
5th.  Methinks  I  feel   in  a  great  degree  the  awful 
distance  I  am  plunged  from  God  by  my  rebellion,     I  find 
some  longing  desires   for  redemption  from  this   gulf.     O 
when  shall  I  get  the  victory  over  the  remains   of  self,  and 
be  more  freed  from  these  chains  of  death  and  darkness.  In 
the  evening  I  preached  and  found  some  liberty. 

6th.  Blessed  be  God  for  the  union  I  found  in  the 
morning  and  likewise  in  the  evening.  O  that  I  could  walk 
in  humility,  and  be  useful  in  his  blessed  cause,  O  that  I 
might  all  my  days  be  married  to  the  Redeemer  and  his 
kingdom  ] 

7th.  This  morning  in  a  solitary  walk  I  enjoyed  a 
greater  nearness  to  God  than  I  have  for  many  months. 
Being  the  Sabbath  I  preached  two  sermons  to  a  great  so* 
ciety,  and  it  f/as  a  day  of  God*s  power. 

8th.  Lord,  rouse  my  heart  with  grace  divine,   - 
Antl  let  me  be  entirely  thine, 

While  mortal  life  remains. 
Then  in  the  glorious  rfealms  above 
With  those  that  sing  Redeeming  love 

I'll  raise  the  highest  strains. 

9th.  O  the  unbounded  goodness  of  God  to  visit  the 
sons  of  men  with  such  blessings  as  he  has  this  day  ;  and 
my  soul  has  had  a  share  with  them.  But  O  what  returns 
have  I  made  [  *      ., 


LIFE   AND  JOUKNAL, 


107 


)yed  a 
lonths. 
;at  so- 


^it  the 
and 
;  turns 


\      t 


loth,  This  morning   in  some   degree    I  waked  vithv 
God,  and  had  a    sence  olthe  world's  being  held  up  by  the 
Redeemer.       O   that   the    world  knew  that  they  were  al- 
ways moving  in  God,  and  acting  for  eternity. 

O  Jesus,  help  me  near  thy  face, 

Inspir'd  with  love  divine  : 
And  give  my  sovil  a  humble  place, 

Neai'  the  dear  tcet  ot"  thine. 

1 1th., O  WHAT  a  load  of  death  and  darkness  I  am  bur- 
dened with,  and  O  how  little  of  God*s  love  do  I  know  and 
enjoy  !  yet  methinks  1  long  for  release,  liberty,  love  and 
humility  ;  then  I  should  be  useful  in  tlie  Redeemer's  bless- 
ed kingdom,  and  rejoice  in  his  name. 

12th.  Many  changing  scenes  I  am  carried  through. 
Sometimes  I  am  in   some  degree  on  Pisgah's  top  and  then 
down  with  Jonah  to  the  bottom  of  the  mountains,  and  the  I 
earth  with  her  bars  are  about  me.     O  the  christian's  life  is 
a  mixture  of  grief  and  joy. 

13th.  O  that  my  trials  might  all  further  mc  in  my 
way  to  the  kingdom.  But  O  I  often  say,  how  can  it  be 
that  I  am  a  christian  :  are  the  frames  I  pass  through  con- 
sistent with  a  redeemed  soul  ?   O  Lord  undertake  for  me. 

I4th.  O  THB  goodness  of  God  to  me  I  Why  am  I  not 
more  filleii  ivith  love  to  God,  when  I  am  so  indulged  still 
with  his  grace  as  1  have  seen  and  enjoyed  to  day  ?  especi- 
ally when  I  was  preaching  ;  and  had  a  great  sense  of  the 
worth  of  precious  souls. 

15th.  I  THINK  I  have  longing  desires  to  walk  nearer 
to  God,  but  the  pride  of  my  heart  leads  me  astray.  O  the 
sin  and  corruption  that  remains  in  my  soul !  How  little  do 
I  love,  how  little  do  I  serve,  and  how  little  am  I  redeemed 
from  self. 

1 6th.  O  THE  ten  thousand  chains  of  death  and  dark- 
ness that  man  is  bound  down  with.  I  thought  some'.imes 
I  had  some  light  and  life,  knew  something  of  God,  and  had 
some  sense  of  divine  truths :  and  yet  I  can  pass  by  the 
cross  of  Christ,  the  dying  groans  and  bleeding  wounds  of 
the  Son  of  God,  with  my  soul  but  little  more  affected  than 
the  stones.  O  that  God  would  awake  me,  and  bless  me 
with  life  divine,  while  this  mortal  life  endures. 

1 7th.  O  COULD  I  rise  this  morning  with  all  my  soul 
to  spread  my  Saviour's  name,  ar^l  devote  my  life,  while 
minutes  roll,  to  tell  the  goodness  oi  the  Lamb :  but  O  how 


10& 


i\E\.   HLNRY  ALLINE's 


!'f 


■I 


little  life  and  activity  do  I  have.  In  the  morning  clouds  and 
darkness  ;  in  the  evening,  while  preaching,  some  light, 
life  and  humility  :  but  soon  my  heart  begins  to  stray  again. 
18th.  O  THAT  1  could  feel  more  of  the  worth  of  pre- 
cious and  immortal  souls,  that  1  might  be  engaged  in  my 
Master's  cause  ;  but  I  find  so  much  sloth,  ignorance  and 
unbelief,  that  I  am  almost  useless. 

19th.  The  scenes  and  trials  of  the  night  past  uncom- 
mon,    ()  shocking  scene  too  great  to  be  expressed. 
When  midnight  slumbcs  in  an  instant  fled, 
And  left  me  trembling  in  furious  storms, 
With  lieliish  monsters  round  my  restless  mind  ; 
And  a  black  gulf  that  yawn'd  beneath  my  feet. 
O  how  I  shudder  at  the  bell  within  ! 
O  lor  redemption  from  blasphemous  self! 
It  is  impossible  to  tell  the  racks  of  distress  that  I  was 
under  when  seeing  and  feeling  the  hellish  nature  that  re- 
mains in  my  body  of  sin  and  death.     For  three  hours  I 
could  neither  pray,  praise  nor  rest,  but  was  so  wounded,  that 
it  seemed  enough  to  separate  my  soul  from  my  body.   Yet 
I  esteem  the  discovery  as  a  precious  jewel,  shewing  me 
more  than  ever  I  saw  before,  the  deplorable  condition  fallen 
man  is  in. 

20th.  This  day  I  continued  under  a  solemn  sense  of 
the  last  night's  travail.  In  the  evening  got  some  release. 
I  implored  that  God  would  shew  me  still  some  important 
scenes  that  seemed  in  some  degree  to  be  on  my  mind,  but 
could  not  discover  what  they  meant,  or  what  the  Lord  in- 
tended. 

2 1st.  I  STILL  retained  a  weight  on  my  mind  from  what 
was  past,  but  sometimes  got  some  happy  moments,  and 
trust  after  God  with  the  weight  of  divine  truths  on  my 
mind.  O  that  God  would  lead  and  support  me.  I  preach- 
ed to  a  great  number  and  saw  miich  of  the  power  of  God 
even  among  the  opposers« 

22d.  This  morning  I  thought  I  found  some  longing 
desi  'es  after  love  and  humility.  O  that  God  would  bring 
me  near  to  himself.  In  the  evening  falling  into  a  society, 
I  was  desired  to  preach,  and  the  Lord  was,  I  trust,  there,  and 
it  proved  a  tiessing  to  some  souls.  O  may  the  Loixl's  name 
be  praised  in  and  by  me. 

23d.  I  HAD  this  morning  some  happy  hours.  In  the 
evening  I  preached,  and  had  great  liberty.  Some  of  those 
who  had  been  in  opposition  seemed  to  have  their  ear** 


ids  and 
;  light, 
r  again, 
of  pre- 
in  my 
ice  and 

uncom- 


Eit  I  was 
that  re- 
hours  I 
kd,  that 
dy.  Yet 
ring  me 
m  fallen 

ense  of 
release. 

portant 
|ind,  but 

.ord  in- 

\m  what 
Its,  and 

on  my 
Ipreach- 

>f  God 

longing 
bring 
society, 
:re,  and 
is  name 

In  the 
)f  those 
lir  earn 


LIFl£  AND  JOURNAt. 


109 


opened,  and  attended  with  earnest  desires  for  ti  blessing, 
«ind,  1  trust,  received  some.     God*s  name  be  praised  for  it. 

S4th.  Othe  unspeakable  trials  of  mind  I  had  in  the 
forepart  of  this  day  I  God  deliver  me  from  them,  and  grant 
me  the  joy  that  is  in  believing.  In  the  evening  I  preach- 
ed, and  a  blessed  evening  it  was  to  my  soul  and  to  those  of 
others.     O  what  an  unsanctiiied  wretch  I  am  ! 

25th.  O  THE  darkness,  death  and  misery  the  world  is 
in  !  Methinks  I  have  a  sense  sometimes  of  millions  and 
millions  that  are  pressing  down  to  ruin.  O  that  they  knew 
in  this  their  day  the  things  belonging  to  their  peace,  that 
fheir  souls  might  be  saved  in  the  day  of  Christ's  appearing. 
Lord,  send  me,  send  me  to  my  fellow^men. 

26th.  Preachi^d  almost  every  day,  and  although  I 
passed  through  many  distressing  hours,  yet  when  I  came 
to  speak  in  God's  name,  then  I  found  liberty,  or  methinks  I 
shcAiId  sink. 

27th.  Met  with  the  chtirch,  and  a  blessed  day  it  was. 
Some  souls  were  added  to  the  church.  O  the  joyful  news 
r)f  salvation  proelaimed  by  young  christians.  To  hear  them 
tell  what  the  Lord  had  done  for  their  souls  was  enough  to 
melt  the -most  hardened  heart.  They  sung  hosannahs  to 
the  son  of  David,  and  declared  the  wonders  of  his  love, 

28th>  I  ADMINISTERED  the  Lord*s  supper  to  the  new- 
embodied  chr.rch  ;  and  it  was  a  day  of  God's  grace.  In  the 
evening  there  were  greater  manifestations  of  God's  power, 
souls  crying  out,  what  must  we  do  to  be  saved. 

29th.  I  HAD  some  heavy  trials,  chains  and  storms  of 
grief  this  day.  O  Lord  God,  support  me  under  the  iri,and 
bring  me  near  to  Christ.  I  went  to  preach  at  a  house  of 
one  who  had  been  an  enemy  to  the  cause.  When  I  came 
he  met  me  at  the  door,  and  desired  me  to  preach  from  a 
particular  text  he  would  give  me.  I  told  him  1  would  not 
preach  to  satisfy  curiosity,  because  I  must  labour  for  the 
good  of  society  ;  but  would  as  willingly  preach  from  one  text 
as  from  another,  if  the  Lord  gave  it  to  me.  He  said,  he 
desired  no  more,  and  then  mentioned  the  text,  which  seem* 
ed  immediately  to  be  given  to  me,  and  took  hold  of  my 
mind.  I  told  him  I  would  preach  from  it  for  it  was  a  bless- 
ed text.  ]  then  went  in  and  preached,  and  it  was  the  most 
powerful  meeting  I  ever  saw  in  that  country.  Yea  1  think 
the  very  devils  became  subject.     O  may  the  Lord's  i\iMiie 


h; 


110 


BEV.    HENRY   ALLINE's 


*  ','i 


i 


»■'    ■  f 


have  all  the  pruise  fur  the  blessings  given  to  souls  tliat 
night. 

30th.  I  AM  surpiiscd  that  I  am  no  more  engaged  than 
1  am,  when  1  consider  the  station  I  am  in,  and  the  Impor- 
tant scenes  I  am  surrounded  ■with. 

31st.  Many  dangers  and  triak  I  have  been  carried 
through  this  month,  but  great  has  been  the  kindness  oi  the 
Lord  towards  me.  O  he  is  a  faithful  ntaster,  althougli  1 
am  an  unfaithful  servant.  O  that  I  had  made  greater  ad- 
vances in  the  Redeemer's  cause.  O  methinks  1  am  still  a 
dry  and  barren  shrub  in  the  vineyard  of  God.  The  month 
is  past,  and  how  little  have  I  done  to  the  good  of  m^  own 
soul,  and  to  those  of  others. 

February  1st.  O  that  I  may  spend,  what  of  this  month 
is  allotted  me,  to  the  glory  of  God,  and  the  good  of  souls. 
Some  happy  hours  I  enjoyed  this  day,  especially  in  the 
fvening.  I  preached  as  1  was  returning  from  Annapolis 
to  Cornwallis.  O  the  sweetness  I  fmd  in  jiroclaiming  my 
.blaster's  name,  that  the  world  knows  nothing  of. 

2d.  I  HAD  some  sense  this  morning  of  redeeming  love. 
But  O  the  pride  and  unfaithl  Iness  of  my  lieart  leads  me 
astray.  O  how  soon  do  I  lose  the  visits  from  Heaven,  and 
receive  such  vain  lovers  in  my  heart.  I  had  some  happy 
hours  in  riding  30  miles  this  day  ;  and  although  I  was  so 
fatigued  by  riding  in  a  heavy  rain,  that  1  could  scaitely  walk. 
when  I  got  from  my  horse  ;  yet  when  1  began  to  preach,  1 
had  such  a  sense  of  the  Redeemer's  cause,  that  I  almost 
forgot  my  bodily  infirmities.  O  the  unspe^able  goodness 
of  God  to  such  a  worm  1 

3d.  I  wKNT  this  day  from  Cortiwallis  to  Horton  and 
had  some  happy  hours,  but  also  some  trials.  I  preached  a 
sermon  in  the  evcniug,  and  the  presence  of  God  was  among 
his  children. 

4th.  I  HAD  uncommon  darkness  and  trials  of  mind  in 
the  morning  ;  so  great  that  I  did  not  kuow  what  I  could  say 
in  the  cause  of  Christ,  expecting  to  meet  part  of  two 
churches  at  the  Lord's  table,  as  I  did.  Rut  the  Lord  Mas 
kind.  I  cannot  tell  tiic  time  that  I  had  such  liberty  in  the 
gospel  ;  and  a  blessed  day  it  was  to  many.  Some  sinne  » 
were  alarmed. 

5th.  This  day  I  saw  enough  to  melt  my  heart  and  a- 
Avake  my  soul  to  love  and  praise  God,  if  I  was  not  more  in- 
&ei\sible  tlian  the  beasts  •:  for  I  went  to  see  a  man,  that  had 


LfTE  AND  JOURNAL. 


Ill 


uls  tliat 

:ed  than 
Impor- 

carricd 
5  of  the 
ougli  I 
ater  ad- 
a  still  a 
month 
n_,   own 

>  month 
r  souls, 
in  the 
napolis 
ng  my 

ig  love, 
ids  me 
n,  and 
happy 
was  so 
y  walk. 
exich,  1 
almost 
odness 

n  and 
ched  a 
imong 

ind  in 

lid  sav 

0 

)f  two 

d  was 
in  the 
inne  s 

nd  a- 
ire  in- 
it  had 


been  one  of  my  intimate  companions  in  sin  and  vanity  be- 
fore I  was  converted  ;  who  was  now  on  the  confines  of  e- 
ternity,  and  appeared  as  far  from  redemption  as  ever,  just 
bidding  farewell  to  this  world  ;  I  fear  without  a  change  of 
heart,  or  knowledge  of  salvation.  O  that  he  might  be 
plucked  from  the  jaws  of  hell  before  he  is  gone  and  no  more 
seen.  And  O  that  I  might  have  my  whole  heart  and  soul 
awake  to  love  God  for  his  goodness  to  me  a  wretch. 

6th  O  THE  unhappiness  of  this  day  by  reason  of  dark- 
ness until  the  evenhig  ;  when  preaching  the  gospel,  the 
Lord  gave  me  great  liberty  from  my  chains,  and  sent  a 
blessing  by  me  to  many  of  his  children.  Lord,  keep  me 
humble  and  take  the  praise  to  thyself. 

7th.  MfcTHiNKs  I  can  say  that  the  greatest  trials,  and 
the  greatest  grief  I  pass-  through,  is  because  I  am  so  far 
from  God,  so  little  redeemed  from  sin  and  self,  and  know 
so  litt!^:  of  the  Redeemer,  alid  am  so  little  inilamed  with 
love  to  his  worthy  name.  O  that  God  would  take  posses- 
sion of  ray  heart  -and  soul,  and  transform  me  into  his  like- 
ness. 

8th.  I  HAD  some  happy  moments  in  the  forepart  of  this 
day.  O  the  sweetness  of  that  peace  beyond  what  tongue  can 
tell.  But  O  it  is  a  thorny  way.  How  soon  do  trials  arise. 
Some  distressing  scenes  opened  to  my  view,  and  made  my 
heart  tremble,  but  the  Lord  was  kind  to  me.  I  preached  in 
the  evening  and  had  great  assistance.  I  trust  I  was  made 
instrumental  in  feeding  God*s  children. 

9th.  This  morning  I  was  under  great  darkness.  O 
what  a  load  it  is.  How  can  I  bear  the  abscence  of  my  Lord 
and  master.  It  seemed  as  if  I  could  not  rest  without  my 
Lord's  return.  Return,  retura,  O  my  God,  blessed  be  his 
name,  he  doco  not  leave  me  long.  Some  happy  glimpses 
of-divine  love.  O  that  God  would  continue  his  goodness  to 
a  wretch.  I  went  this  evening  to  see  an  aged  woman  near 
the  grave,  and  had  no  Saviour.  O  what  a  shocking  sight 
it  is  to  see  an  immortal  soul  in  that  miserable  condition. 
Lord  God  have  mercy  on  her. 

10th.  O  THE  unhappiness  of  living  at  a  distance  from 
God.  I  think  my  soul  groans  to  be  delivered  from  dark- 
ness and  death.  This  day  seemed  to  be  a  day  of  darkness 
until  the  evening,  when  I  found  some  relief.  O  the  worth 
and  sweetness  of  one  hour,  yea  one  minute  in  the  presence 
•£  God. 


fr 

w          ■   ■ 

j 

1 

'  1 

112 


REV.  MENRY  ALLlK^'s 


l\ 


*4 


l# 


llth.  I  I'RK ACHED  this  day  in  Falmouth,  and  it  was  ft 
day  on  which  God  fed  his  children  with  redeeminpj  love  ; 
and  my  own  soul  found  great  liberty  ;  so  that  I  could  speak 
boldly  for  God  :  and  1  trust  the  day  was  not  in  vain  to 
sinners. 

12th.  Wknt  to  Hortoi'  with  some  christians  who  were 
very  lively  rejoicir.pj  and  shouting  as  they  rode,  and  speak* 
ing  of  the  wonders  of  God*^s  love.  I  trust  the  Lord  was 
with  us,  us  with  the  two  disciples  that  travelled  to  Emmaus, 
and  caused  the  hearts  of  some  of  us  to  burn. 

13th.  O  THE  scene  I  had  this  day  of  the  necessity  of 
a  friend  in  a  dying  hour,  and  the  greatness  of  that  change 
in  some  small  degree.  But  O  it  i^  unknown  (but  by  seme 
ghmpses)  to  all  the  inhabitants  of  this  mortal  world.  No 
one  but  those  beyond  the  grave  can  tell  it.  In  the  evening 
I  preached,  then  rode  about  6  miles,  and  found  some  sense 
of  a  present  God  after  I  had  retired  to  my  bed. 

I4th.  Riding  from  place  to  place  I  was  blessed  with 
a  sense  of  God's  love  to  the  world.  My  soul  enjoyed  hap- 
py hours  with  God.  O  the  sweetness  of  divine  truths. 
In  the  evening  1  preach  to  a  great  number,  chiefly  of  youths, 
and  God  was  there*.  O  what  longing  desires  I  had  (or 
their  everlasting  salvation. 

15th»  O  HOW  unhappy  it  is  to  live  at  a  distance  from 
God.  Could  I  bear  to  vcar  away  one  year,  as  I  have  this 
forenoon.  O  how  do  the  unbelieving  world  live  forty  or 
fifty  years  having  no  hope  and  without  God  in  the  world. 

16th.  I  HAD  great  liberty  in  my  soul  this  morning, 
and  seemed  to  find  my  heart  awake  :  after  which  I  rode 
out,  and  met  with  great  opposition.  I  was  called  a  liar, 
compared  to  a  Papist  and  received  many  reproaches. 
But  O  what  return  shall  I  make  to  God,  that  I  find  his 
grace  keeps  my  corrupt  nature  down,  and  as  soon  as  I  left 
them,  could  find  in  my  heart  to  forgive.  O  the  praise 
belongs  to  God,  and  to  him  only. 

17th.  I  FOUND  some  nearness  to  the  fountain  of  living 
waters.  But  O  how  little  is  my  heart  awake,  and  my  soul 
engaged  for  God.  I  am  surprised,  that  I  am  no  more  ia 
love  with  the  blessed  Redeemer.  O  God,  redeem  me  from 
4eath. 

18th.  I  WAS  in  some  degree  enabled  this  morning  to 
stay  myself  upon  God.  I  preached  two  sermons,  and  the 
Lord  fed  many  of  his  children*     As  for  my  own  part  I  did 


it  was  ft 
P:  love ; 
Id  speak. 

vain  to 

ho  were 
d  speak-^ 
ord  was 
mmaus, 

essity  of 
change 

)y  seme 
d.     No 

eveninjj 

le  sense 

ed  with 
ed  hap- 
truths. 
youths, 
had  ibr 

ce  from 
ive  this 
brty  or 
orld.    ' 
orning, 
I  rode 
a  liar,  * 
oaches. 
nd   his 
s  I  left 
prai  sc 

f  livinj^ 
\y  soul 
lore  ill 
e  from 

ling  to 
nd  the 
t  I  did 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


113 


not  find  that  freedom  which  sometimes  I  have  had.    I  likc- 
.  wise  spoke  in  the  evening  and  found  some  liberty  and  more 
love.     But  O  for  humility,  humility. 

19th.  I  AWAKED  this  morning  with  some  sense  of  di- 
vine things, and  after  I  got  upfounda  great  nearness  to  God 
in  prayer,  and  my  soul  fed  on  immortal  bread.  But  O  too 
soon  it  is  gone.  I  find  my  soul  needs  daily  bread  as  much 
as  my  body  :  neither  can  a  christian  live  without  it. 

20th.  Some  distance  from  Ciod  in  the  morning.  O 
the  darkness  and  distress  I  pass  through,  when  I  do  not  en- 
joy my  God.  In  the  evening  I  got  some  liberty  in  preaching , 
O  it  is  sweet  speaking  for  God,  when  he  stands  by  and  as- 
sists us  :  which,  blessed  be  God,  I  have  found  by  experience. 

2 1st.  O  HOW  unhappy  are  those,  who  spend  their  days, 
having  no  hope  and  without  God  in  the  would.  I  have 
been  this  day  some  hours  without  his  sensible  presence.  O 
what  an  unhappy  mortal  have  I  been.  All  my  friends  and 
earthly  enjoyments  fuil  to  make  me  happy,  when  I  mourn 
the  absence  of  my  God. 

22d.  Although  I  enjoyed  something  of  God  this  day, 
especially  in  the  evening  when  I  preached  :  yet  I  am  so  fur 
from  such  a  realizing  sense  of  things,  as  I  think  1  ought  to 
have,  and  my  soul  aspires  after  ;  that  methinks  I  know  no- 
thing, and  am  ready  sometimes  to  say,  that  I  am  one  of 
the  most  blind  mortals  on  earth,  and  almost  as  insensible 
as  the  beasts. 

23d.  Though  I  live  so  far  from  God,  and  have  so  lit- 
tle of  divine  truths  ;  yet  methinks  I  can  say,  T  neither 
hear,  see  nor  know  of  any  thing  in  the  whole  system  of 
creation,  that  my  soul  so  pants  after  as  the  livhig  imd  true 
God.r  When,  O  when  shall  I  be  brought  near  him  and 
feast  on  his  love.  My  soul  longs  for  thee,  for  thee,  O  my 
God  ;  return  O  mv  friend. 

24th.  For  want  of  the  presence  of  God,  I  have  passed 
away  the  greatest  part  of  thi^  day  in  grief  O  for  some 
glimpse  of  my  Saviour' 5=  love  l  I  long,  I  long  to  see  his 
face,  and  to  find  my  mind  bound  up  in  a  lively  sense  of  his 
presence. 

25th.  I  PREACHED  this  day  to  a  great  society.  My 
soul  had  great  liberty  in  the  forenoon  ;  in  the  afternoon  a 
great  sense  of  the  death  and  darkness  that  still  remains  on 
the  soul :  but  in  the  evening,  when  exhorting,  found  Ui?: 
Lord  nigh,  ami  could  rejoice. 

K2 


lU 


REV.  HENRY  ALLXNB^ 


26th.  Although  I  cannot  say,  but  I  have  enjoyed 
something  of  my  Redeemer's  love  this  day  ;  yet  methinks 
it  is  so  little  in  comparison  of  what  my  soul  longs  for,  that 
I  just  begin  to  see  my  emptiness^  and  long  to  taste  more'. 
Give  me,  give  me,  O  my  God,  larger  draughts  of  redeem- 
ing grace. 

27th.  I  HAD  some  communion  with  God  this  morn- 
ing. But  O  how  soon  it  is  gone,  and  my  soul  was  left  to 
mourn  until  the  evening,  when  an  aged  christian  came  to 
see  me,  who  telling  the  dealings  of  God  with  his  soul,  got 
my  mind  awake  and  my  heart  enfiamed  ;  at  the  same  time 
I  found  my  mind  bore  away  into  another  region.  O  the 
sweetness  of  conversing  with  the  saints  of  God  about  our 
Father's  Kingdom.  After  this  I  preached,  and  found  the 
Lord  was  there  cf  a  truth.  IVly  soul  and  the  souls  of  ma- 
ny others  were  awake  with  love  arid  joy  divine. 

28th.  This  day  1  went  from  Cornwallis  to  Horton  r- 
and  O  how  was  I  grieved  to  see  a  vast  croud  of  people  at 
horse-racing.  O  that  they  knew  the  worth  of  those  pre- 
cious hours  they  are  wasting,  and  the  danger  their  poor 
souls  are  in,  they  would  not  risk  their  souls  on  such  a  pin- 
nacle of  danger.  O  are  these  my  fellow  men  acting  for, 
and  hastening  to  a  boundless  ecernity,  and  so  unconcerned  I 
F'ty  their  souls,  O  my  blessed  Jesus,  and  awake  them.  Af- 
terward I  left  all  my  companions,  and  all  other  company  ; 
and  as  I  was  riding  through  the  woods,  my  soul  enjoyed 
that,  which  the  world  cannot  give  nor  take  away.  The 
Lord  of  his  infinite  mercy  appeared,  walked  with  me,  and 
fed  me  with  immortal  bread. 

Ten  thousand  thanks  I  owe,  but  nought  to  pay* 

To  that  kind  hand,  that  guards  my  dang'rous  way.   •v.. 

Thro  the  past  month  He  made  my  life  his  care, 
'  And  kept  my  soul  from  ev'ry  fatal    nare. 

Although  to  him  I  so  unfaithful  prove,       * 

He  deals  with  me  in  kindness  and  in  love. 

Ten  thousand  blessings  he  has  freely  given  ; 

Sweet  hours  of  peace,  and  a  foretaste  of  Hea'n. 

Has  bless'd  my  labours  in  the  gospel  field, 

And  from  his  word  some  sacred  truths  reveal'd; 

O  could  I  now  with  all  my  fioul  awake, 
'  And  all  my  idols,  sloth  and  sins  forsake ; 

And  spend  the  few  remainder  of  my  days 
-      >  To  his  great  name  as  monuments  of  praise. 

^        May  sacred  love  my  heart  and  soul  inflame,.  ' 

To  cry,  all  worthy,  worthy,  is  the  Lamh. 


tXFE  ANn  JOURNAL. 


115 


enjoyed 
nethinks 
for,  that 
tc  more', 
redeem - 

is  morn- 
its  left  to 
came  to 
soul,  got 
ime  time 
O  the 
bout  our 
bund  the 
is  of  ma- 

Horton  r- 
eople  at 
lose  prc- 
leir  poor 
ch  a  pin- 
;ting  for, 
icerned ! 

em.  Af- 

mpany  ; 

enjoyed 
The 

me,  and 


ray. 


March  lit.  Come,  blessed  Jesus,  now  my  heart  enf^age,  ' 

To  spread  thy  name  while  on  tliis  mortal  stage. 
Lei  me  begin  this  precious  month  anev. 
Bid  all,  but  my  Redeemer's  cause,  adieu. 
Where'er,  O  God,  my  mortal  feet  sliall  treid; 
O  fix  my  eyes  on  Christ,  my  blessed  head. 
Make  mc  successful  in  my  Saviour's  name. 
With  humble  mind  thy  gospel  to  proclaim. 

I  was  under  vaiious  impressions  this  day.     I   had 
some  dark  and  some  happy  hours.     In  the  evening  I  found. 
the  sweetness  of  redeeming  love.     Lettjie  name  of  Jesus 
get  the  praise  for  it. 

2d.  I  WENT  this  day  to  visit  some  who  had  been  g^cat 
opposers  to  the  cause  of  Christ,  but  seemed  now  to  have  a 
hearing  ear.    O  that  they  might  escape  from  eternal  death, 
that  their  souls  might  be  saved,  in  the  day  of  Christ's  ap- 
pearing.    In  the  evening.  I  preached,  and  the   Redeemer 
himself  was  there,  tccding  his  children  with  redeeming  love. 
3d.  AxT HOUGH  I  pass  through  many  trying  hours, 
yet  I  trust  they  will  all  turn. for  my  good.  But  O  how  Httle 
am  I  submissive  to  the  ways  and  will  of  God.  I  cannot  find 
my  soul  so  bound  to  the  will  of  God,  as  to  feel  myself  melt- 
ed at  his  teet.     O  that  (iod  would  humble  nie,  and  devote 
my  soul  to  his  praise,     Mclhinks  his^  ways  are  so  sweet  I 
long  to  be  wholly  for  God.     This  evening  I  spcke  by  ex- 
hortation in  a  company  and  the  Lord  blessed  my  labours. 
It  was  a  blessing  to  many  in  the  room  as  well  as  to  myself. 

4th.  I  preached  in  the  forenoon  under  a  sweet  sense 
of  being  a  mouth  for  God,  and  tlie  power  of  God  was  like 
a  mighty  rushing  wind.  In  the  afternoon  sermon  a  blessing 
attended, but  not  with  such  power  as^in  the  forenoon.  In  the 
•  evening  I  rode  about  4  miles,andprcaclied  again.  The  Lord 
blessed  my  labours  by  feeding  some  of  his  children  and  by 
awakening  some  si"  ners.  O  that  I  might  live  and  die  in 
the  cause  of  God.     A  ble&sed  cause  it  has  been  to  my  soul. 

5th.  I  had  this  morning  some  sense  of  God*s  love,, 
and  felt  my  soul  willing  to  be  wholly  for  God,  and  devoted 
to  his  praise.  After  this  I  felt  darkness  prevail.  I  went 
to  Falmouth,  spent  .the  evening  with  some  of  my  christian 
friends,  and  God  was  amongst  us.  But  O  how  little  do  I 
love,  how  little  do  I  praise  that  blessed  hand,  from  whom 
I  receive  such  inexpressible  blessings. 

6th.  The  thoughts  of  living  one  year,  as  I  have  done 
this  morning)  without  the  presence  of  God,  would  break. 


116 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINii  S 


V' 


my  heart.  But  O  he  is  kind,  and  doth  not  leave  me  long- 
without  some  taste  of  his  love  ;  but  1  hve  too  far,  too  fur 
from  my  God.  When  shall  I  be  brought  nearer.  Ilum- 
Wle  me  O  my  God.  and  let  mc  live  to  thee  and  for  thee  a- 
lonc.  God's  presence  bej^ins  my  joy  and  makes  my  Hea- 
ver, but  bus  al)bei»ce  bej^ins  my  sorrow,  and  leaves  me  to 
mourn.     Bless  mc,  O  my  God. 

7{]u  O  HOW  little  is  my  heart  affected  under  such  a- 
larmuij^  truths  witli  such  important  scenes  as  I  am  encir- 
cled with.  O  that  I  was  alive  by  faith,  that  I  mij^ht  not 
spend  my  days  so  far  trom  the  only  thinc^,  for  whicii  I  am 
continued  in  this  world.  O  what  will  soften  my  heart,  or 
what  will  melt  my  soul  to  love. 

8th.  O  THK  heavy  hours  this  day.  I  was  mourning  for 
God's  absence,  and  wanderinj^  in  the  dark  imtil  the  evcninj^, 
when  preachins;  my  soul  ^ot  reliel.  But  O  too  soon,  I  am 
afraid  I  shall  j;et  away  from  God  again  and  lose  my  joy. 
Lord  keep  me,  keep  me 

9th.  Lord  awake  my  soul  and  impress  on  my  he.'ift 
thy  blessed  truths,  that  I  may  not  only  hear,  but  feel  that 
blessed  name  of  Jesus  and  live  to  his  praise. 

loth.  O  WHO.  would  think  that  So  soon  after  receiving 

a  manifestatiwi  of  God's*  l6ve  I  should  find  m)'Belf  in  cap- 

til  ity  ? 

How  many  scenes  of  changes  day  and  night, 
My  soul  goes  thro'  of  clouds  and  glimpse  of  light  .'„' 
One  hour  my  soul  enjoys  redeeming  love,  . 
The  next  1  in  a  barren  desert  rove. 

1 1th.  This  day  preached  two  sermons  and  found  the 
Lord  to  be  pres^nnt  both  to  me  and  others.  A  great  dis- 
covery was  given  to  many  of  us  of  coming  out  of  self  and 
before  God.  But  it  is  the  work  of  the  Redeemer,  and  ma- 
ny souls  felt  it  this  day,  and  reJ9iced  in  redeeming  love  and 
the  wonders  thereof. 

12th.  Some  sweet  rays-  of  divine  love  broke  out  into 
my  soul  this  day,  and  caused  me  to  long  for  more.  Why 
should  I  starve  in  aland  of  plenty,  or  go  mourning  when 
the  the  gospel  is  all  around  me  ?   Lord  awaken  me. 

13th.  O  WHAT  changes  of  life  while  wading  through 
this  wilderness.  Sometimes  up  then  down.  One  hour  in 
the  light  and  then  dark.  I  enjoyed  some  blessed  moments 
this  morning,  when  my  soul  rejoiced.  In  the  evening  tria.(s 
and  a  great  sense  of  darkness. 


MFR  AND  JOURNAL. 


UT 


e  lon^ 
too  fut 
Hum- 
thce  a- 
y  Hea- 
me   to 

such  a- 

encir- 

jht  not 

1  I  am 

lart,  or 

ling  for 
vcning, 
n,  I  am 
ly  joy. 

y  heiirt 
el  that 

ceiving 
in  cap- 


XI 


nd  the 
eat  (lis- 
elf  and 
nd  ma- 
3ve  and 

mt  into 
Why 
;  when 

irough 
lour  in 
oments 
g  trials 


14th.  As  1  was  riding  to  Nc^>port  I  found  sonric  hap- 
py hours.  But  C)  I  do  not  enjoy  >vhat  I  might  if  my  heart 
was  right  with  (iod.  Yet  I  think  I  long  for  a  nearness  to 
God.  O  the  happiness  of  living  near  to  him,  who  is  the 
blessed  (iod  of  peace  and  happiness. 

15lh.  1  HAD  this  day  a  great  sense  of  I'l;^  emptincs.^ 
and  vanity  of  all  tilings  '  'jre  below.  If  I  had  millions  and 
millions  of  worlds,  they  would  not  make  mc  happy.  Christ 
is  all  in  all,  in  him  1  Hnd  a  solid  peace.  U  Jesus,  be  my 
God. 

16th.  This  day  I  preached  in  a  dark  part  of  Newport, 
but  God  was  there  ;  and  thwe  appeared  great  attention  to 
the  word.  Some  soubi  wtTe  awakened,  and  my  own  so»il 
felt  the  life  of  religioi\.  Blessed  be  the  Lord  for  standing 
by  such  a  worm. 

17th.  I  VISITED  n  man  on  a  death-bed  ;  found  him 
under  a  great  sense  of  the  necessity  of  being  regenerated^ 
with  a  desire  for  redemption.  Travelling  from  the  house 
with  a  young  man,  I  made  a  stop  in  the  woods,  as  I  fre- 
quently used  to  do.  God  gave  me  a  great  nearness  to  him- 
self :  but  the  young  man  in  a  particular  manner  was  car- 
ried away  under  such  a  sense  of  the  love  of  God  and  hi^ 
own  nothingness,  that  he  could  not  forbear  crying  out.  A 
good  day  it  was  to  us  both. 

18th.  PaKAcfHED  two  sermons,  found  uncommon  lib- 
erty in  my  soul,  and  many  felt  the  the  word.  O  that  I 
might  ever  be  kept  humble  at  the  feet  of  Jesus,  then 
would  my  soul  rejoice. 

19th.  I  WENT  to  P'almouth,  preached  in  the  evening, 
and  found  the  Lord  nigh.  But  O  the  trials  of  mind  which 
I  had  soon  after,  which  arose  from  a  sense  of  my  distance 
from  Cod.  Light  discovers  dfirkness.  Liberty  makes  mc 
often  feel  fetters,  and  groan  under  them  ;  but  not  so  much 
at  the  same  instant  as  soon  after  it ;  then  I  discover  disor- 
der and  death. 

20th.  I  SET  out  for  Halifax,  and  still  retained  a  great 
sense  of  the  distance  that  I  and  aU  mankind  lived  from  the 
only  thing  for  which  we  have  our  being.  In  the  evening» 
being  in  a  private  room  at  a  tavern,  I  found  my  heart  ta 
melt.  O  the  blessed  hours  that  I  sometimes  thus  enjoy 
when  the  Lord  is  nigh  me,  which  the  v'orld  knows  nothing  of. 

21st.  This  was  an  unhappy  day  to  me  ;  for  although 
I  had  success  in  getting  a  book  from  the  presS)  yet  not  spe- 


rid 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINt's 


I  ■  i 


^-;/ 


ing  an  opportunity  to  preach  the  gospel,  as  I  longed  to  do  ; 
and  having  no  religious  society  (tliough  I  found  two  or  three 
christians  there)  almost,  made  ready  to  sink,  O  that  I 
could  always  live  with  Oodin  the  world. 

2^2cl.  1  REMAiNKD  in  the  town  till  the  evening.  O 
what  a  land  of  darkness  it  is.  Who  could  believe  by  the 
conduct  of  the  croud,  when  passing  through  the  place,  that 
tliey  were  bound  for  an  eternity,  each  one  having  an  im- 
mortal soul  of  more  value  thlan  millions  of  worlds.  O  how 
it  grieved  my  soul,  when  there  appeared  no  desire  nor 
room  for  the  gospel. 

23d.  1  RODE  to  Falmouth,  and  had  some  happy  mo- 
ments :  but  my  soul  did  not  find  that  lig)it  and  liberty 
which  I  have  often  enjoyed,  and  I  felt,  at  the  same  time, 
impatient  to  spread  the  Redeemer's  name. 

2'4th.  O  HOW    I  long  for  that  the  world  cannot    give. 

0  for  the  love  of  Jesus  to  draw  my  soul  after  him,  and  en- 
gage me  to  praise  him.  Give  me,  O  blessed  Lamb  of  God, 
the  enjoyment  of  thyself,  and  let  me  be  thine  forever;  then 
shall  my  soul  rejoice  in  thee,  the  God  of  my  salvation, 

25th.  Blessed  be  God  for  the  manifestations  of  his 
k)ve  to  my  soul  this  day,  and  for  the  great  freedom  he  gave 
me  in  proclaiming  the  Redeemer's  name,  and  for  bles- 
sings given  to  poor  sinners.  Some  came  out  and  rejoiced 
in  the  Redeemer's  kingdom,  and  his  love  to  them.  And 
what  was  most  rejoicing,  was  to  see  a  poor  negro-man  get 
up  and  tell  what  God  has  done  for  his  soul.  Blessed  be 
God,  that  he  chooses  the  weak  things  of  the  world,  and 
things  despised  of  men.  I  have  often  seen  in  the  com- 
pass of  my  travels,  poor  servants  and  slaves  shouting  forth 
tiie  Redeemer's  praise  ;  while  their  masters  stood  in  open 
rebellion,  and  rejected  the  simplicity  of  the  gospel. 

26th.  Cast  down  but  not  in  despair.  For  though  I 
find  such  darkness  and  trials  at  times,  yet  I  find  more  hap- 
piness than  all  the  world  can  give  me.  But  O  how  little 
do  I  love,  how  little  do  I  praise  God,  and  how  far  do  I  live 
from  God  I.  O  thou  ever  blessed  God,  take  me  near  unto 
thee. 

27th^  Cf  the  remains  of  sin  and  dapkness  !  How  shall 

1  be  delivered  from  these  chains.     My  soul  thirsts  for  lib- 
erty, like  the  Hebrew  slaves  for  the  year  of  Jubileee.  When, 

0  when  shall  1  obtain  the  victory  over  self  ?  This  evenincj 

1  i)reached,  and  found  some  joy  in  the  cause  of  Christ, 


to  do  ; 

>r  three 

that  I 

ig.     O 

by  the 

ce,  that 

an  im- 

O  how 

ire  nor 

py  Tno- 

liberty 

2  time, 

t   give. 

and  en- 

ofGod, 

r ; then 

n, 

of  his 

le  gave 

\r  bles- 

ejoiced 

And 

.\n  get 

5sed  be 

,  and 

com- 

forth 

m  open 

)ugh    I 
e  hap- 
littie 
1  live 
unto 

w  shall 
or  lib- 
When, 
venincr 


Id 


V 


I/IFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


119 


28th.  I  HAD  some  longing   desire  after   the  blessed 

'God  this  day,  but  not  that  nearness  to  the  Saviour  as   my 

heart  pants  after.     O  unhappy  state  ;  when  I  cannot  enjoy 

my  God.     Help  me,  O  my  Jesus.     O  the  trials  of  my  soiii 

when  I  was  ridiu'^  about  1 1  o'clock  at  night. 

29i:h.  This  morning  I  had  some  relief  from  the  trials 
of  the  last  evening.  1  had  some  happy  moments  when 
discoursing  with  some  christian  friends,  and  preached  in 
the  evening  to  a  large  society. 

30th.  The  more  I  sec,  the  more  1  am  convinced  that 
I  am  blind.  I  this  day  saw  my  blindness  more  tiian  ever. 
O  that  I  was  more  awake,  and  moi-e  acquainled  with  God 
and  myself.  O  what  an  insensible  state  is  the  world  in  ! 
How  little  do  tiiey  know  lliemselves,  and  O  where  are  they 
bound  to  '. 

31st.  THot'Gii  the  work  of  God  has  ceased  here  in 
some  degree,  yet  blessed  be  God,  there  are  yet  some  under 
conviction,  and  some  seekers.  O  that  they  may  not  seek 
in  vain.  And  O  that  God  M'ould  enlarge  my  heart  to  love 
liim,  and  give  praise  to  his  name,  and  be  for  him  for  ever. 
How  kind,  O  dear  Jesus,  is  thy  care  to  worthless  me,  » 
Avorm,  and  how  nuich  do  I  sliare  of  thy  free  grace  ! 

April  1st.  O  might  I  now  the  ensuing  month  begin      , 

To  serve  my  God,  unci  flee  from  ev'ry  sin,  ,,• 

O  that  the  Lord  would  my  whole  soul  inflame, 

To  tell  mv  tellovv-men  his  blessed  frame. 

Lord  give  me  meekness  and  a  humble  heart, 

That  1  may  never  from  thy  ways  depart.  "  ' 

Be  thou  my  leader,  portion,  and  my  friend, 

Till  days  and  weeks  and  months  with  me  shall  end. 

Then  call  my  spirit  to  tlie  peaceful  shore, 

Where  I  shall  sin  nor  sorrow  any  more. 

This    day    I  preai  lied   in    ^Vindsor,  where  I  never   | 
j)reached  before.     There  appeared  something  of  an  heariiii'; 
ear  ;  but  at  the  same  time  the  devil  was  raging,   and  the 
great  men  of  the  place  tery  much  opposing.     I   trust  God 
intends  to  begin  a  work  of  grace  in  that  town. 

2d.  This  morning  Twas  invited  to  see  a  num  who 
iiad  been  an  opposer,  but  seemed  to  begin  to  hear.  O  that 
their  hearls  might  bow,  that  1  might  yet  wash  their  feet  iu 
the  gospel.  Rut  1  had  this  day  some  heavy  trials  in  my 
mind.  Lord  remove  my  darkness.  O  that  my  soid  might 
enjoy  more  liberty  in  the  gospel,  and  receive  sweet  visith 
from  tlie  love  of  Jesus  t  ^  ,  ... 


120 


R«V.   HENRY  ALLINE'S 


«.. 


•••.■ 


!'■'' 


it 


r  'I 


i1 


3d.  This  day  I  went  to  Horton.  I  preached  in  the 
-evening,  when  the  blessed  Jesus  gave  me  his  presence,  and 
some  success  in  the  minds  of  the  hearers.  O  what  a  de- 
sire I  felt  for  the  salvation  of  some  of  the  youths,  when  I 
was  speaking  to  them  in  the  name  of  Jesus. 

4th.  This  day  I  preached  in  Horton.  There  seemed 
to  be  great  movings,  especially  amongst  the  young  people. 
O  that  their  precious  and  immortal  souls  might  be  saved  in 
Ihe  day  of  Christ's  appearing. 

5th.  SoMi;  happy  moments  I  had  in  riding  to  Com* 
\  allis  ;  but  O  iiot  half  so  much  as  I  might  have  if  my  heart 
\Vi  .s  more  redeemed.  O  this  unbelief  i  remove  it,  remove 
it,  O  blessed  God,  and  give  me  liberty. 

6th.  This  day  to  my  pen,  und  I  thought,  with  a  de- 
sire that  all  might  be  a  blessing  to  souls,  when  I  am  done 
with  in  this  world,  if  not  before.  I  think  I  wish  to  be  spent 
in  the  service  of  God  and  the  welfare  t>f  souls. 

f  th.  I  FOUND  some  nearness  to  God,  and  my  soul 
could  rejoice.  But  O  how  soon  do  some  earthly  toy« 
steal  me  away.  How  soon  do  I  lose  the  sweetness  of  di- 
vine things  and  l^ecome  barren.  O  what  a  miracle  I  am  to 
myself ;  one  hour  rejoicing  on  the  mount,  the  next  I  am 
down  in  the  valley  wandering  in  the  wilderness,  and  grovel- 
ling in  the  dark. 

8tli.  I  PREACHED  this  day,  and  found  the  Lord  at 
hand.  My  own  soul,  and  the  souls  of  others  were  much 
indulged  with  the  love  of  God.  O  what  returns  of  love 
•shall  I  repay  for  what  I  have  seen  and  felt  of  Christ  this 
day. 

9th.  O  THAT  I  had  more  victory  over  pride  and  un- 
belief, that  my  soul  niight  live  nearer  to  the  blessed  Jesus, 
and  desert  him  no  more. 

Take  me,  O  blessed  jesus,  in  thy  arms, 

And  fill  Hiy  soul  with  thy  transporting  chifl-ms. 

10th.  When  Jesus  is  nigh  my  soul  rejoiceth,  but 
when  absent  I  mourn.  Happy  are  they  that  eat  bread  with 
him  daily,  that  do  not  live  in  a  legal  form,  nor  on  past  ex- 
perience,  l)ut  gather  manna  every  morning.  This  day 
when  preacliing  ray  soal  tasted  of  that,  w  hich  th.e  world 
cannot  give. 

Uth.  Employed  sometime  in  writing  this  day  :  and 
blessed  hours,  I  have  often,  being  thus  employed,  enjoyed  ; 
when  I  could  feel  what  I  wrote,  and  feast  my  soul  on  the 
glorious  plan  of  life*  •      . 


i  in  the 

net,  and 

at  a  de- 

when  I 

seemed 
;  people, 
saved  in 

to  Com* 
nv  heart 
,  remove 

ith  a  de- 
am  done 
be  spent 

my  soul 
thly  toy« 
ss  of  di- 
ll I  am  to 
xt  I  am 
d  grovel- 
Lord  at 
re  much 
of  love 
hrist  this 

t  and  un- 
ed  Jesus, 


:eth,  but 
read  with 
1  past  ex- 
This  day 
e   world 

lay  :  and 
enjoyed  ; 
ul  on  the 


llFE  AND    JOURNAL. 


lil 


12th.  O  I  have  reason  to  say  witli  Rebecca,  1  arr 
weary  of  my  life,  because  of  the  daughters  of  Ileth.  O  the 
remains  of  death  and  barrenness.  How  it  wearies  my  soul) 
and  makes  me  mourn  as  in  a  wilderness  Now  and  then  I 
hav .:  a  glimpse  of  light,  love  and  liberty  ;  but  O  too  soon  I 
slit  e  back  to  chains,  formality,  darkness,  death  and  insensi- 
bility. 

ISth.  I  CANNOT  live  without  something  of  Jesus. 
What  is  all  my  past  experience,  unless  i;  be  revived  in  my 
heart  ?  O  let  me  never  live  a  day  withe  at  convene  with 
Heaven,  and  a  taste  of  divine  tilings. 

14th.  This  day  one  of  the  churches  met.  I  was  there, 
and  some  members  joined  the  church.  And,  O  blessed 
day  it  was,  for  Jesus  himself  was  there  by  the  assistance  of 
his  Holy  Spirit,  and  therefore  his  children  must  rejoice,  and 
darkness  must  flee. 

I5th.  This  was  a  day  that  God  passed  by,  and  gave 
his  followers  a  visit  of  his  love.  Scarcely  one  at  the  house, 
"where  we  met  for  worship,  but  was  much  indulged  with  his 
presence  ;  especially  those  that  came  to  the  table.  O  how 
kind  the  Lord  is  to  make  use  of  those  representations  in 
the  elements  to  stir  up  the  hearts  of  his  children,  and  give 
them  the  living  bread.  O  happy,  happy  souln  with  such  a 
Father. 

16th.  Who  would  have  thought,  that  in  so   short  a 
time  as  from  yesterday,  I  could  have  got  my  mind  bO  im- 
prisoned, after  having  had  so  much  liberty.     But  God  re- 
members my  frame.     In  the  evening  my  soul  could  again 
rf^joice  *n  the  God  of  my  salvation. 

1 7th.  I  RODE  this  day  some  distance,  and  preached 
in  the  evening  ;  passed  through  various  scenes  in  my 
mind,  yea,  sometimes  through  various  changes  and  frames 
in  one  hour.  O  tlie  restless  nature  of  an  imprisoned 
soul. 

18th.  O  WHEN  shall  I  enjoy  what  my  soul  longs  for, 
when  shall  I  :  _  the  tim^  that  i  may,  like  Enoch,  be  able 
to  walk  all  my  time  with  God.  I  had  some  happy  hours 
this  evening  ;  but  O  for  more.  • 

19th.  Hiding  to  Falmouth,  I  felt  a  great  sense  of  the 
darkness  of  man's  mind, crying  out,  why?  v)  why  is  not  my 
mind  conversing  with  God  all  the  way,  and  filled  with  hit 
love  ? 


Ijiv 


109 


PvLV.  HEWIY  ALLII.E  S 


20t}i.  O  THIS  unfeeling  heart  of  mine  ;  "vvhy  does  it 
not  melt ;  what  keeps  me  from  continually  rejoicinj^  in 
Jesus ; 

Lord,  take  my  idols  all  away, 
And  turn  ray  darkness  into  day. 
On  my  poor  spirit  dartly  shine, 
And  let  me  live  on  bread  divine'. 

21st.  Little  dees  the  world  know  either  the  trials  or 
the  happiness  of  the  christian.  What  scenes  are  they 
carried  through,  unknown  by  the  unconverted  I.  It  is  a  way 
the  vultvire'b  eye  hath  not  seen,  nor  lion's  whelp  ever 
trod  ;  but  O  it  is  a  blessed  wtiy  ;  for  in  the  most  trying 
hours  tlic  christians  would  not  change  stations  with  the 
king  on  the  throne  with  all  his  earthly  grandeur  and  en- 
joyments ;  and  although  at  times  they  may  have  troubles 
ever  so  trying,  yet  they  are  safe  ;  for  God  Mill  soOn  brin^- 
all  sorrows  to  a  period. 

22d.  This  was  a  day  of  rejoicing,  when  I  was  preach- 
ing. Many  christians  were  released  from  long  trials,  and 
shouted  forth  their  Redeemer's  praise.  O  that  the  world 
knew  by  happy  experience  what  t  ley  enjoyed,       ; 

23d.  This  day  I  waslabowing  with  some  young  peo- 
ple, and  God  blessed  my  labours.  O  how  my  heart  re- 
joiced to  see  the  prime  of  life  devoted  to  God  ;  and  although 
much  despised  by  the  ungodly,  yet  what  can  be  more  hap- 
py, more  safe,  or  more  honorable,  than  for  young  men  and 
women  to  follow  the  Lamb,  and  espouse  his  blessed  cause. 
And  they  shall  one  day  shine  with  angels  and  archangels 
at  the  right  hand  of  the  Redeemer. 

24th;  I  HAD  some  unhappy  hours  this  forenoon  by 
reason  of  darkness,  but  happy  hours  in  the  evening,  when 
proclaiming  the  Redeemer's  name  to  my  fellow-men.  O 
the  unspeakable  worth  of  one  hour  in  his  presence. 

25th.  Pride  and  unbelief  are  my  cruel  enemies. 
They  wound  my  soul,  dishonor  God,  render  me  useless, 
and  lead  me  into  a  wildeniess.    <  ,     *         . 

26th.  I  PREACHKD  this  day  in  tlie  evening,  my  soul 
found  the  blessed  Lord  to  be  nigh.  My  tongue  had  liberty, 
and  my  soul  was  so  affected,  that  I  longed  to  spread  the 
gospel  from  pole  to  pole.  Many  of  the  christians  were 
very  happy.     May  Jesus  have  the  praise. 

27th.  O  IT  is  by  the  smiles  of  the  King  of  Heaven  that 
my  soul  thus  rejoices.  O  it  is  the  Redeemer's  love  mr 
heart  fuels.  .1 


!!      . 


oes   it 
[u\^   in 


iiils  or 
i  they 
i  a  way 
p  ever 
trying 
ith  the 
iiid  en- 
roubles 
1  bring 

Dreach- 
ils,  and 
e  world 

ng  peo- 
eart  re- 
though 
e  hap- 
len  and 
cause. 
fi  an  gels 

lOon  by 

',  when 

len.     O 

lieiTiies. 

iseless, 

Uy  soul 
I  liberty, 
;ad  the 
lis  were 

ren  tViat 
love  n>y 


Lll't  AT«D  JOUnNAL. 


!23 


ORth.  O  Jesus,  docs  not  my  soul  loni^;  for  the  enjoy- 
tnent  of  thy  blessed  self,  and  pant  for  thy  love,  as  the  liart 
panteth  after  the  water  brooks  ?  O  humble  me  and  take, 
rae  in  the  arms  of  thy  love,  and  let  me  walk  with  thee  all 
my  days. 

29th.  This  day  I  preached  in  Windsor,  where  the  « 
gospel  has  been  long  shut  out,  and  where  unconverted  min- 
isters traded.  The  Lord  blessed  his  word  l)y  me,  and  th>-jre 
appeared  an  attention  with  hunger  here  and  there.  One 
began  to  niake  somt  inquiry  about  that,  whicli  is  so  mucii 
undervalued  by  the  geneiality  of  mankind.  O  that  Ciod 
vrould  carry  on  a  work  here. 

30th.  A^TKOUGii  many  of  the  great  men  oppose  the 
gospel,  and  my  preaching  here  ;  yet  there  appeared  more 
and  more  doors  open  for  me  to  preach.  I  spent  some  time 
this  day  with  some  inquiring  minds,  and  found  by  the  grace 
of  God,  a  great  freedom  to  proclaim  the  name  of  Jesus,  and 
the  power  of  religion  arainst  whatever  opposition  there 
might  be.     • 

May  1st.  This  day  I  preached  again  at  Windsor  j 
and  the  Lord  was  pleased  to  bless  my  labours  to  some  souls : 
and  although  the  evening  raged  to  that  degree  that  I  wa*j 
threatened  by  some  of  the  leading  men  of  the  government  ^ 
to  be  silenced,  and  put  on  board  a  man  of  war  ;  yet  the 
Lord  was  kind  to  me,  and  gave  me  boldness  in  his  name  ; 
and  more  doors  were  opened  to  receive  the  gospel. 

2d.  I  RETURNED  to  Falmouth,  and  found  much  of  the 
presence  of  God.  I  preached  a  lecture  there.  O  the  great 
kindness  of  my  blessed  Master  to  me,  his  unworthy  and 
unfaithful  servant.  The  saints  of  God  were  fed  by  God's 
blessings  on  my  labours.     O  may  Jesus  get  all  the  praise. 

3d.  I  HAD  this  day  some  darkness  and  trials  of  mind, 
and  some  peaceful  moments.  And  blesaed  l)c  God  I  am 
say,  I  tind  no  rest  in  any  thing  but  in  God,  and  I  hope  I  ne- 
ver shall.     Lord  Jesus,  keep  my  soul  awake. 

4th;  LwKNT  to  Horton,  and  enjoyed  some  happy  mo- 
ments on  the  road.  I  think  I  could  say  before  God,  as  far 
as  I  know  my  heart,  I  long  for  purity  of  heart,  and  holiness 
of  Hfe.  O  that  God  would  search  me,  and  cleanse  me  from 
every  evil. 

nth.'O  HOW  can  I  live  so  far  from  God  ?  How  can  F 
endure  such  an  unfeeling  heart  ?  It  is  a  burden  to  my  souF 
beyond  any  thing  that  I  suffer.     No  wonder  the  apostl*. 


124 


REV.  HENRY  ALLIWE'S 


J 

1 
1 

I 

cried  out,  O  ^vretched  man  that  I  am,  who  shall  deliver  mfr 
frqm  this  body  of  sin  and  death  ? 

6th.  I  puE ACHED  this  day  at  the  court-house  in  Hor- 
ton  ;  and  God  came  as  in  his  spii'it  with  power  to  his  chil- 
dren :  nunvbers  of  them  were  rejoicing.  In  the  evening  I 
preached  again.  TJic  house  was  crouded  where  I  preached, 

7th.  In  the  evening  I  had  some  happy  moments :  but 

0  they  were  too  soon  gone  by  my  unbelieving  heart,  and 
theii  I  went  mourning  till  the  evening,  when  my  heart  and 
tongue  were  at  liberty  in  preaching.  Bles«<.d  be  tlie  God  of 
Jacob  for  this  night. 

8lh.  I  RODE  to  Cornwallis,  but  cUi!  not  find  my  heart 
breathing  afterGod,as  I  have  soinetimes  done  nding,though 

1  had  some  happy  moments  wiiJi  u  seafaring  man,  tliat  I 
overtook  and  travelled  with,  whom  I  found  to  be  a  (  hris-. 
tian,  and  who  told  me  his  experience  ar  d  the  travels^of  his 
soul,  which  were  very  remarkable.  When  i.nder  convic- 
tion, he  was  brought  so  near  to  despair,  and  to  give  up  all 
hopes  of  ever  being  saved,  that  he  hud  often  put  his  hand 
in  the  fire  to  try  how  he  could  bear  the  torments  of  hell,, 
and  yet  after  all  was  brought  out  a  bright  christian,  and 
now  shouts  for  the  wonders  of  God's  love  and  grace  to  th« 
fallen  race. 

9th,.  I  ENJOYED  some  happy  hours  this  day  witJi  my 
pen  ;  when  I  found  in  my  soul  a  desire  that  my  writings 
might  after  my  decease  be  useful ;  far  although  I  preach- 
ed without  any  notes,  neither  did  I  write  many  sermons, 
yet  I  wrote  much  on  almost  every-  essential  truth  of  the 
gospel. 

loth.  7  PREACHED  this  day,  and  found  great  liberty. 
God  revived  his  children  greatly,  so  that  some  of  them 
were  almost  overcome.  O  how  do  such  things  appear  to 
the  world,  that  i^  blind  in  sin,  and  knows  nothing  of  what 
the  christians  enjoy  in  their  souls  of  God. 

1  Uh,  O  THAT  I  could  live  with  my  mind  shut  out  from 
the  world,  and  all  its  flatteries  ;  as  the  Lord  has  command- 
ed to  enter  the  closet  and  shut  the  door  :  the  happiness  of 
which  I  have  known  by  experience  even  in  such  company. 

12th.  I  HAD  some  trials  of  mind,  and  some  sense  of 
divine  things.     O  that  I  could  be   more   sensible  of  that 
invisible  hand  that  is  still  engaged  for  my  welfare.     I  had 
some  happy  hours  with  some  cliristian  brethreo  that  iii  tha 
•yening  came  to  see  me.  * 


LIFE    AN'D  JOURXAC. 


IC'S 


ivev  mc 

in  Hor- 
his  chil- 
/ening  I 
reached, 
its:  but 
;art,  and 
eart  and 
e  God  of 

ny  heart 
g,  though 
1,  that  I 
■t  a  ( hris-. 
elsdoi'  his 
;r  con  vie - 
ive  up  all 

liis  hand 
s  of  hell,. 
,tian,   and 

,ce  to  th« 

witji  TdJ 

writings 

1  preach- 

sermons, 

:h  of  the 

It  liberty, 
of  them 
I  appear  to 
ig  of  what 

|t  out  from 
'ommand- 
Ippiness  of 
I  company. 
|e  sense  of 
of  that 
-e.     I  had 

[that  ia  tha 


1 3th.  I  CAxMF.  to  the  table  of  the  Lord  with  the  church 
at  Cornwallis,  and  enjoyed  much  of  divine  truths  :  but  I 
think  I  enjoy  more  under  the  sermons  than  at  the  breaking 
of  the  elements.  I  veiily  believe  that  many  christians  set 
too  much  by  the  elements  or  the  command,  as  though  they 
expected  a  blessing  of  reward  hereafter,  for  following  or 
obeying  the  command- of  Christ,  or  external  observations  ; 
for  it  is  a  truth  that  it  does  them  no  more  good,  than  it  proves 
a  means  of  stirring  up  and  awakening  the  heart :  and  that 
is  all  it  is  given  to  us  for :  and  so  are  all  the  means  of 
grace. 

14th.  I  HAD  some  trials  of  a  hard  heart,  but  some  lib- 
erty in  the  evening.  There  was  a  yonng  man  that  came 
from  ^Vindsor  to  see  me,  and  hear  the  gospel,  being  under 
great  convictions.  My  soul  can  rejoice  at  limes  at  the  pro- 
motion of  the  Redeemer's  cause  j  but  O  that  I  had  greater 
longings  for  it. 

l5th.  I    HAD  some  happy  moments  this  day.     O  ho^v 

•  little  do  I  know  or  enjoy,  considering  what  God  has  done, 

and  is  doing  for  me.     1  am  am  amazed  at  myself.     What 

privileges    I    am   indulged   with,    and    how   little   I    am 

transformed  to  tiie  holiness  of  Gcd. 

16th.  C)  THE  distance  that  I  find  myself  from  God 
this  day  until  the  evening,  wi^en  I  was  preaching,  my  soul 
■was  hroi>ght  nigh  to  God.  But  I  count  it  a  blessing  to  see 
my  blindness  and  feel  my  death.  It  is  light  that  discovei's 
darkness,  and  life  feels  death. 

17th.  This  day  I  left  Cornwallis  to  go  to  Annapolfs 
with  two  men  that  came  for  me.     O  that  Jesus  would  go 
.with  me,  and  make  this  a  prosperous  journey.  • 
O  that  my  Jesus  v/oaid  employ 
My  heart  and  soul,  w  ith  sacred  joy. 

To  sound  the  wonders  of  ids  grace.  ^ 

'    .  O  that  I  might  a  blessing-  prove, 

To  spread  the  sweetness  of  his  love, 
,  Amongst  the  worst  of  Adam's  race; 

I  RODE  about  10  miles,  and  preached  a  lecture,  and 
then  rode  several  miles  more  the  same  day,  and  enjoyed 
some  sweet  moments  on  the  road.  \ 

18th.  This  day  I  rode  about  20  miles.  Sometim.es 
my  heart  was  at  liberty,  and  then  in  prison.  O  the  changes 
of  the  christian's  frames.  One  hour  they  are  ready  to  say, 
th^ir  mountain  stands  strong,  and  they  can   rejoice   ainU 

L2. 


rt!<  i 


W 


'J! 

t' 

i 

t^ 

' 

\         1 

'        t 

' 

;    ^1 

i' 

' 

ill 
1 

,  i 


:'■* 


I       ^ 


!  ]'-; 

M 

1 

i 

126 


REV.  HEKRV  ALLINR'b 


think  they  are  the  happiest  creatures  in  the  world  :  the 
next  hour,  if  they  do  not  continue  their  state,  they  feel 
darkness,  death  and  blindness,  and  think  there  are  none  so 
unhappy. 

19th.  O  THAT  the  world  knew  the  happiness  of  the 
followers  of  the  Lamb,  and  the  sweetness  I  have  found 
in  his  love,  since  I  knew  his  ways*.  For  although  1  pas*, 
through  many  trials,  unknown  to  the  world,  yet  they  prove 
for  my  good,  and  I  enjoy  more  in  one  hour  tlian  all  the 
world  can  give  me. 

fOth.  Many  thronged  to  hear  the  word  this  day.   My- 
self and  others  had  great  liberty.     O  the  sweetness  of  the 
gospel,    when  the  soul  can  feed   on   it.     In   the   evening 
God  smiled  on  some  of  his   children,  so  that  they   could, 
hardly  speak  in  exhortation  or  in  prayer,  being  so  much, 
overcome  with  joy  and  love. 

21st.  I  RODE  about  10  milc",  and  preached  a  sermon. 
The  power  of  God  was  so  great,  that  every  christian  there 
i-ejoiced. 

2  2d.  O  HOW  happy  do  I  find  this  body   of  sin   and 
death  ;  how  it  giicves  and  wounds  my  heart.     O  that  eve- 
ry fetter  were  broken,  and  every  mountain  removed. 

23d.  This  day  I  visited  some  that  were  just  in  the 
grave,  and  to  all  appearance  strangers  to  Christ.  O  what 
a  shocking  thought  it  is  for  a  man  to  live  1%  the  world 
threescore  years  and  ten,  and  die  out  of  Christ,  and  go  to 
hell.  In  the  evening  I  preached,  and  it  was  clearly  evi- 
dent that  God  was  there,  by  the  influences  of  his  Holy 
Spirit. 

24th.  I  PREACHED  this  day  of'Christ's  sufferings- and 
works  among  the  fallen  race.  I  tiiink  God  was  pleased  to 
discover  to  me  and  others  some  important  truths  of  the  ev- 
erlasting gospel.  O  the  worth  of  God'6  word,  when  open- 
ed and  applied  by  his  Holy  Spirit. 

25th.  I  FOUGHT  almost  the  whole  of  this  day  with  the 
\  the  old  man,  and  obtained  no  victory,  but  remained  still  in 
captivity  till  the   evening;,  and  thought  I  could  for  a  short 
time  triumph  over  my  inward  foes. 

26th.  Sometimes  1  think  I  know  some  little  of  God, 
it  seems  almost  needless  to  publish  his  name,  or  attempt  to 
do  it :  yea,  the  more  I  see,  thv  more  I  perceive  my  igno- 
rance. O  for  wisdom  from  ?ibove  to.  humble  the  soul>  and 
exalt  the.  Redeemer* 


LIFE   AND  JOURNAL. 


1  «• 


:  the 
ley  feel: 
lone  so 

of  the 
found 
1  pass 
y  prove 
all  the 

.  My- 
of  the 

evening 
could, 

o  much. 

sermon, 
m  there 

jin   and 
hat  eve— 
d. 
in  the 

0  what 
5  world 
id  go  to 
rly  evi- 
ls Holy 

igs-  and 
eased  to 
r  the  €v- 
;n  open- 

with  the 

1  still  in 
a  short 

of  God, 
:empt  to 
ly  igno- 
oul>  and 


'^7th.  This  day  I  preach jd  to  a  great  number  of  peo- 
p^fe  in  a  bari\.  Many  of  tlie  christians  were  rejoicing.  But 
v)  how  little  is  my  soul  affected  to  wl»at  it  should  l>f:,  in  de- 
livering such  truths.  Although  I  sometimes  feel  my  soul 
awake  and  happy,  and  engaged  beyond  what  I  can  ex- 
press, yet  it  is  no  ways  adequate  to  the  importance  of  thi? 
subject  ;  and  the  more  I  sec  and  feel,  mulhinlcs  the  less 
I  see  and  feel  in  my  own  conception. 

28th.  I  ENJOYED  this  day  some  happy  moments,  auri 
had  some  heavy  hours  and  darkness.  O  vvhcit  a  crooked 
and  uneven  walk  the  christian's  walk  is.  One  hour  ii; 
liberty  and  rejoicing,  the  next  in  prison  and  grieving. 

29th.  This  day  I  rode  with  company  some  distance 
and  then  preached.  1  think  my  soul  felt  the  power  of  the 
gospel  ;  likewise  many  others.  ()  the  sweetness  of  God*s 
word,  when  it  comes  with  power  to  tlie  sou!.  Ah  I  little 
does  the  world  know  what  the  christians  enjoy. 

30th.  O  THE  death  that  1  feel  this  day  at  times -in  my 
soul  ;  and  then  for  a  short  moment  would  get  relief  again  : 
and  would  think  that  I  should  not  get  so  imprisoned  again  ; 
and  perhaps  in  an  instant  would  find^  myself  again  in  a 
wildeniess..  O  that  I  could  live  with  God  every  hour  of 
my  life,  and  desert  from  him  no  more. 

3 1  St.  Rode  in  company  some  distance,  and  preached. 
Conviction  seemed  to  be  revived  on  the  minds  of  many, 
and  christians  got  some  blessings..  My  own  soul  enjoyed 
happy  moments,  but  too  soon  got  away  again  from  God  in 

the  dark. 

Great  i&  the  kindness  of  my  Saviour's  hand,  * 

Who  leads  me  thro'  this  world's  deceitful  land  ; 
Guards  me  in  peace  from  all  the  rage  of  hell, 
Amidst  my  foes  makes  me  in  safety  dwell. 
June  1st.  Throu(3h   the  unbounded  goodness  of  my 
God,  who  fills  the  heavens  with  his  glory,  I  am  brought  to 
the  beginning  of  another  month   in  health   of  body,  and 
sometimes  in  health  of  soul.     O  might  I  now.  give  up  my 
soul,  my  hand,  my  tongue,  my  life,  and  aU  to  the  R  jcJeeruer. 
2d.  O  the  happv  -;ioments  I  have  found  sometimes  at 
my  pen,  when  I  fino    iny  soul   disentangled  froni  every 
amusement,  and  stayr.d  upon  God,  and  feeding  on  hig  love. 
Bv*t  I  am  grieved  that  I  enjoy  no  more,  when  I  am  so  much 
indulged.      This   day   I  have  hours   aloni  and  none   to 
make  me  afraid  ;  but  still  I  find  pride  and  unbelief  bars  mc 
from  much  of  the  .love  of  God, 


•^'fK^ 


mv' 


¥.Pi 


n^jV.  IIF.NRY  AI.r.INL 


n 


1' 


ZO,.  Freaciifd  tliiii  day  two  scnnoiis  in  ;i  lurp;c  barn,- 
an<l  lowurds  sunscl  one  SL-rnion  in  u  prlvalo    iifuisc.     Th<; 
Lord    was  witli    nic,   and    ^illi     he  society    most  of  the 
dav,   and  tlrat   very  sensibly.     Si'iners  v.cre  awakened  anil 
chriblians  were  rejoicii'if^. 

'lib.  ()  THiu  cl'.ani^es  that  the  Spirit  of  (iotl  makes  in  a 
man's  n/nul.  'I  hi*  liay  1  was  mvited  to  a  man  wlio  had 
been  j^o  i;'rcat  an  opposcr  as  to  ti;rcv»ten  to  abu.se  me.  I 
foiiiul  liim  undei"  a  i.  veat  sense  of  liis  con(iiti(;n,  and  cryini^ 
for  nrjicy.  1  staid  with  hini  tliat  niji^-ht.  Some  others  in 
the  same  nei[i;Iibcurb.o(  d  were  awakened. 

.Oth,  I  Roni:  witii  a  christian  friend  from  place  to  pUicc 
to  see  them  th.^t  were  uwakened,  and  tlien  preached  in  the 
evenini;.  'I'hc  Lord  warr  there  by  hir  Spirit,  and,  I  trii«t, 
set  the  truths  homu  en  the  minds  ol  many.  IJIessed  be  his 
name, 

6th,  I  SPKNT  tlic  fore  part  of  this  (Uiy  goinp;  from 
house  to  house,  and  conversing-  with  sainis  and  sinners. 
I  preached  in  the  afternoon,  and  althow.gh  the  people  were 
dismissed  about  seven  o'clock,  yet  so  great  was  their  de-- 
sire  to  hear,  that  tliey  left  not  the  house,  but  remained  un- 
Vil  eleven  o'clock  at  nig;ht,  and  Clod  gave  a  blessing. 

7th.  I  RODii  twenty  miles  this  day,  and  preached  a 
sermon  ;  and  the  Lord  fed  iiij  children,  and  my  own  soiU 
got  greatly  refreshed. 

8th.  1  HAD  this  day  some  vf:ry  Inappy  , moments,  and 
some  very  trying  ones  ;  but  God  carried  me  through  thera, 
blessed  be  his  name,  and  gave  me  strength  equal  to  my 
day  ;  but  <.)  how  little  do  I  love  or  fear  him  ;  or  what  do  I 
do  to  his'  praise  . 

9lh.  Tnis^day  I  met  the  church.  Some  joined  the 
church,  and  the  Lord  was  there.  Yea  and  something  very 
uncommon-,  and  for  the  comfort  of  aged  and  distressed  sin- 
ners happened  there.  An  old  woman  came  and  declared 
her  conversion,  w'ho  had  lived  70  years  in  the  world,  and 
hud  been  a  member  of  a  church.  She  said  she  thought  to 
become  a  christian  gradually,  and  thought  herself  as  good 
as  otliers  in  the  church. .  O  that  thousands  in  the  world, 
who  are  church-members,  were  as  sensible  of  their  igno- 
rance of  Christ  and  the  new  birth. 

10th.  I  PREACHED  two  sermotts  this  day  in  a  large 
harp,  and  partook  of  the  sacrament  with  the  church.  SomiC 
more  joined  the  church,  and  a  blessed  day  it  was  to  many 


'^'A'c  I)arn;. 
;.se.     T\,ii 
''t  of  the 
'tiled  and 

uikcs  in  a 

wjio  iiad 

inc.     I 

'f'  ciyinjv 
•Uicrs  in 

loplaee 
'(I  i:j  tlic 

I  tniht, 
■fl  be  his 

S:  from   ' 
'iinners. 
Ic  were 

licir  de- 
iK'd  un- 


L»FE  ANI>  JOUR>NAL. 


r2f 


ched   a 
'n   soiU 

s,   and 
'  them, 

0  my 

itdoX; 
fl    the; 

';  very 
cl  sin- 
iared 

1  and 

M  to 

Ejood 
orJd, 
gno- 

j»  -.'■■••    ■ 
irge 

)me 

any 


of  them.  I  rode  to  a  meeting-house,  where  I  preachecj 
again,  and  some  of  the  brethren  exhorted  and  prayed.  Some 
of  them  were  almost  ready  to  leave  their  bodies  with  rap- 
tures. 

1 1th.  O  thR  mournful  hours  of  darkness  with  a  sense, 
of  the  body  of  sin  and  death  I  was  burthened  with  this 
day  !  O  how  can  I  live  any  longer  witliov.t  Ciod.  O  where 
sliould  I  go  for  help  or  rest,  if  I  had  nc  God  :  but  blessed, 
be  his  name,  he  appears. 

12th.  I  HAD  some  liberty  this  day,  especially  in 
preaching  ;  but  not  so  much  as  my  soul  longed  for.  When, 
O  when  will  Jesua  give  me  more  hberty  of  soul  ?  When 
sliall  I  get  more  victory  over  sin  and  death,  and  live  and. 
walk  with  God  every  hour  of  my  life  ? 

13th»  None  but  christians  can  tell  the  burthen   of^ 
death  and  darkness  they  have  sometimes  to  bear.     The 
sinners  know  not,   they  are  dead.     I  had  some  happy  mo- 
ments this  evening  when  preaching,  and  some  sinners  were 
convicted.  O  that  God  would  convert  their  souls. 

14th.  I  RODE  about  11  miles  and  preached,  and  thea 
about  13  miles  in  the  evening  ;  and  a  hippy  evening  it  was 
to  me  riding  alone  through  the  woods.  1  thouglit  it  wa\ 
as  happy  a  ride  as  ever  I  knew,  8ind  although  it  was  very 
dark,  yet  that  darkness  was  pleasant  to  me,  because  I  liad 
light  within.  O  the  unspeakable  worth  of  a  heavenly  friend,, 
and  the  sweetness  of  conversing  with  him. 

15th.  Mt  mind  at  times  seemed  stayed  on  God  thif 
day  ;  but  I  had  some  ilarkness  and  trials  for  part  of  the 
day  ;  yet  the  Lord  was  kind,  and  blessed  be  his  name. 

16th.  As  1  came  to  Horton  last  evening   I   met  this  y 
day  the  church  of  Horton  and  Comwallis.     Some   mem*^ 
bers  were  added  to  the  church  ;  and  it  was  a  day  of  joy  to 
christians  ;  and  it  was  the  joy  of  my  heart  to   meet.  with, 
them  and  see  them  happy. 

17th.  A  TERY  large  number  met  this  day  from  three 
towns,  and  part  of  the  churches  came  to  the  Lord's  table« 
The  Lord  gave  his  children  a  great  sense  of  his  love.     O^ 
that  I  could  love  him  more. 

18th.  This  morning  I   had  some  happy  momenta^ 
.  an#  spent  some  time  with  three  men  that  were  under  con- 
viction,  who  came  from  a  great  distance  to   see  me.     O 
may  they  be  brought  to  knpw  the  Lord  and  to  enjoy  hi^Ss 
Ipve.. 


ICO 


RKV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


n 


\ 


19lh.  I  HAD  not  mucli  liberty  this  day  until  the  eve- 
ning when  prcachinj^.  God  gave  my  soul  '.i  sense  of  his 
love  ;  and  many  of  the  children  of  ( iod  were  also  jjjrcatly 
blessed.  Some  were  almost  carried  out  of  the  body  with 
divine  discoveries. 

20th  1  WKNT  to  Falmouth,  and  had  not  much  liberty 
in  my  soul  till  the  evening.  O  that  1  could  find  my  whole 
soul  awake  to  love,  pray  and  praise  my  Ood,  and  that  I 
niii^ljt  enjoy  him  every  hour  of  niy  life. 

21r,t.  Many  assembled  this  day  to  hear  tlie  gospel, 
and  God  made  it  a  good  day  to  his  children,  and  to  some 
tinners  in  awakening  them,  and  bringing  them  to  cry  out 
for  mtrcy.  O  tha*  they  might  find  relief  to  their  souls. 
It  was  also  a  good  oay  to  my  soul ;  but  I  do  pot  live  so 
near  to  God  as  I  think  I  might. 

22d.  I  THINK  I  long  to  live  above  rII  things  here  be- 
low, and  have  my  mind  continually  stayed  upon  God,  that 
I  might  feed  upon  his  love,  and  praise  his  nnme,  as  long  a» 
1  live, 

2od.  Many  dark  moments  I  waded  through  this  day, 
and  it  seemed  I  was  the  most  unhappy  of  all  beings,  I 
find  the  nearer  I  have  lived  to  God,  the  more  distressing 
it  is  to  be  in  the  dark.  O  how  can  I  bear  his  absence  s'o 
long  ?  I  must  have  some  glimpse  of  his  love,  or  I  cannot 
live.     I  find  he  is  kind,  and  reclaims  mc  very  often. 

24th*  This  morning  my  soul  seemed  at  liberty  before 
meeting,  and  part  of  the  day.  O  the  happiness  of  having 
the  mind  borne  away  above  the  vs^orld  I  and  it  was  a  day  of 
rejoicing  to  the  christians  There  was  the  greatest  num- 
ber thot  ever  I  saiv  attend  in  that  town,  and  they  appesured 
to  give  great  attention. 

25th.  Who  could  have  thought,  unless  they  had 
known  it  by  experience,  that  a  christian  could  so  soon  get* 
his  mind  in  prison,  after  he  has  had  such  liberty,  which  was 
my  case  this  day  ?  but,  blessd  be  God,  he  soon  appeared 
again  and  gave  me  some  taste  of  his  love.  O  may  he 
have  the  praise,  ard  may  my  soul  rejoice  in  him. 

26th.  I  THOUGHT  I  should  not  have  had  liberty  this 
day  ;  for  I  would  have  it  for  about  a  moment,  and  was  then 
in  darkness  a;.;ain  ;  but  in  the  afternoon  when  I  preached, 
the  Lord  gave  my  soid  more  liberty,  than  I  have  had  for 
some  time.  Many  of  the  christians  were  likewise  rejoicing* 
()  that  I  could  love  such  a  good  God  more,  and  live  morei 
to  his  praise^.  '  •  ^  . 


LlfE  AND  JOUUNAL, 


131 


the  eve- 
56  of  his 
)  p^fcatly 
"»(ly  witii 

:li  liberty 
II  y  uhole 
ncl  that  I 

gospel, 
to  some 
'  cry  out 
r   souls. 

live   so 

icre  bc- 
od,  that 
long  a» 

lis  day, 
iigs.  I 
ressing 
ence  so 
cannot 

before 
having' 
day  ©f 
num- 
)eared 

had 
)n  get 
h  was 
cared 
ly   he 

this 
then    -  ; 

1  for 
cing-^ 
iioroL 


27th.  I  uoDK   with  a  christian  friend   from  place  to 

place,  and  conveised  with, the  pe(Ji)le.     The  doors  of  same 

liouaes  were  open  to  converse,  but  others  so  evidently  shut, 

that  I  soon   left    them.     As  for  myself,  1   passed  this  day 

through  various  seenes  of  light  and  darkness 

28th.  I  wENr  over  to  Windsor  wit. i  tour  or  five  in 
company,  and  preaciiid  a  lecture  there.  Tlic  Lonl  caused 
some  movings  amonr;,st  the  people,  and  I  eiijoyed  some 
happy  mom«iUs  in  my  soul.  O  that  I  could  feci  thw  love  of 
Jesus  every  hour. 

29th.  I  WENT  to  sec  some  people  uutler  some  mov- 
ingfi  of  the  Sph'it,  but  did  not  enjoy  nuich  hl.>-.ily  :r.  my  own 
soul.  •  C)  how  unhappy  it  is  lo  feel  a  load  of  c';-  ith  and 
darkness,  pride  and  luibelief,  williout  some  lijjlit  and  libei  ty. 

30tli.  It  seems  an  enccurugement  to  sre  li'^oplc  j^ive 
such  a'tention  in  tlii;:  dar'.:  ph'xe  as  I  <ViMnd  tliey  did  :  the 
Lord  was  with  us  this  lay,  and  it  was  a  good  day  to  the 
christians  ;  yea,  u  \.>:o<)d  day  to  I'.nMi  souls  indeed. 

July  Ist.  This  day  was  a  vyood  day  to  the  ehri^tians, 
who  were  there  mostlv  from  otl^er  towns  ;  and  some  sin- 
ners  were  under  conviction.  We  met  again  just  before 
sun-down,  ^nd  many  people  attended.  , 

2d.  t  jfAD  some   happy  moments    tliis  day,  likewise  , 
some  darkness.     O  that  1  could  enjoy  Cod  every  hour,  and 
live  to  him.  r 

O  would  the  Lord  stoop  dovin  so  low, 
To  ruard  iviy  i'cet  where'er  I  g-o, 

And  devote  nie  lo  Ills  praise. 
O  lake  nie,  take  i"ne  near  to  thee, 
.-  And  let  mc  but  buctcssful  be, 

In  thy  cause  all  my  days. 
3d.  I  ENjoYKD  this  day  some  happy  hours;  and  about  the 
middle  of  the  afternoon,  I  took  a  walk,  and  thought  I  felt  not 
only  a  nearness  to  God,  but  likewise  some  peculiar  impres- 
sions on  my  mind  of  the  necessity  of  giving  all  up  to  God,  let 
what  would  come  ;  aiid  I  saw  the  need  I  stood  in  of  having  a 
friend  to  loan  unon.  I  often  told  tlie  Lord  that  1  never 
should  be  able  to  go  through  the  storms  of  the  world  witli- 
out  a  sense  of  a  present  friend,  and  seemed  as  nYuch  en- 
gaged to  miplore  the  hand  of  God  to  supportr  me,  as  if  I. 
licid  knov/n  I  lu\d  some  trials  to  no  through  immcdiatelv. 
And  m  i  :ss  than  an  hour  I  was  threatened  of  my  life  by 
two  or  three  men.  An  ofiicer  of  emin-rants  came  to  me  > 
first  with  his  reproaches  in  the    public   street,   scymg,  lie 


1 39 


1''\  itt 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE^S 


I  told 


wanted  that  I  should  convert  him 
have  expected  good  manners  and  civility  from  a  nian  that 
made  his  appearance,  letting  alone  religion  ;  and  that  I 
wondered  that  one  like  him  wonld  assault  a  stranger  in  that 
manner  in  the  public  streets.  Pie  then  began  to  curse  and 
«wear,  asking  me  what  riglrt  I  had  to  preach.  I  told  him 
it  was  out  of  my  power  to  give  him  the  least  account  of  it. 
He  then  raged  in  a  most  shocking  manner,  and  threatened 
•my  life,  with  bitter  oaths.  After  this  two  ruffians  went  by 
the  house  where  1  was  with  drawn  swords,  -swearing  they 
would  take  away  my  life,  but  did  not  come  in  the  house^ 
.although  there  was  not  one  that  resisted  them  :  neither 
.'did  I  attempt  to  hide  or  flee  from  them,  but  was  sitting  in 
*  tlie  house  discoursing  with  some  christians.  Thus  I  saw, 
that  in  all  their  rage,  there  was  an  awe  upon  them.  O  tlwkt 
they  might  see  and  repent  before  it  is  too  late. 

4th.  About  five  in  the  afternoon,  came  an  officer  to 
the  house  where  I  was,  in  an  insulting  manner.  The  mafi 
of  the  house  turned  him  out  of  the  doors.  After  which  he 
cursed  and  blasphemed,  and  laboured  to  break  open  the 
door  with  a  stick  of  wood.  In  a  few  moments  there 
were  near  twenty  men  round  the  door,  many  of  them 
swearing  they  would  l)e  the  death  of  me.  I  was  advised  by 
some  in  the  house  to  go  out  at  the  back  door  and  getaway, 
I  replied  that  I  would  -do  it  by  no  means,  1  was  called  there 
\yy  God,  and  there  I  would  stay,  till  duty  called  me  away. 
I  opened  the  window,  and  asked  them  what  they  wanted  of 
me  ;  telling  them  to  act  like  reasonable  men  ;  and  if  I  had 
done  them  any  wrong,  I  was  ready  to  answer  for  it.  After 
"  which  I  told  the  people  of  the  house  that  1  would  go  out 
among  them,  and  see  if  I  could  not  pacify  them.  My 
friends  advised  nie  not  to  go  out,  telling  me  they  would  cer- 
tainlv  kill  me.  I  told  them  I  feared  not,  and  that  I 
.  would  go  out,  and  they  might  fasten  themselves  in. 
I  then  opened  the  door,  and  went  out.  They  came 
around  me,  and  one  of  them,  lifting  up  his  hand,  swore 
he  would  be  revenged  on  me.  I  caught  him  by  the 
forepart  pf  his  coat  with  meekness,  and  begged  him  to  con- 
sider what  he  was  about,  and  to  act  like  a  rational  man. 
He  cursed  an  ]  swore  for  a  ^vhile,  but  did  not  strike  me.  By 
this  time  the  officer  and  otherj  in  the  company  became  so 
calm  as  to  talk  witli  me.  I  wes  thirn  told  by  the  officer, 
that  lie  would  advise  nae  as  a  friend  to  desist  frotii  preaci;- 


I  iTfiight 
man  that 
d  that  I 
er  in  that 
;urse  and 
told  him 
ant  of  it. 
lireatened 
s  went  by 
,ring  they 
le  house^ 
:  neither 
sitting  in 
Lus  I  saw, 
..     O  that 

officer  to 
The  man 
which  he 

open  the 
nts  there 

of  them 
idviscd  by 
get  away, 
lied  there 
me  away, 
wanted  of 
d  if  1  had 
it.  After 
lid  go  out 
em.     Mv 

• 

vould  cer- 
id  that  I 
selves  in, 
ey  came 
nd,  swore 
u  by  the 
m  .0  con- 
Mi  al  man. 
erne.  By 
ecame  so 
le  officer, 
a  preach- 


IIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


IfS 


ing,  or  leave  the  place.  I  told  him,  I  should  obey  God  be- 
fore man.  He  then  told  me  my  life  would  be  t£Lken  away 
in  a  few  days  if  I  continued  preaching.  I  told  him  I  would 
preach  when  1  was  called  ;  neither  was  I  about  to  leave  the 
place,  until  duty  called  me  from  it :  and  after  some  more 
conversation  with  him  and  others  of  the  company,  I  bid 
him  a  good  night,  and  went  in  the  house.  A  little  after  I 
got  in,  another  party  of  men  came  round  the  corner,  and 
rushed  up  to  the  door,  inquiring  for  me  in  a  great  rage  ; 
but  did  not  come  in  the  house,  but  remained  round  the 
door,  some  of  them  mocking  and  hooting,  while  we  were 
singing  and  praying. 

5th.  This  day  my  life  was  threatened,  if  I  walked 
out.  But  God  was  stronger  than  a  strong  man  armed  ; 
for  I  had  no  hands  laid  upon  me.  In  the  evening  they 
came  round  the  house  where  a  number  of  us  had  met  to 
sing  and  to  pray,  cursing,  swearing  and  threatening.  O 
may  I  ever  have  a  heart  to  pity  them  and  to  pray  for  them, 
as  long  as  they  are  objects  of  prayer.  O  that  they  might 
return  and  consider  before  the  great  day 

6th.  Blessed  be  God  for  his  kindness  and  love  to  me 
this  morning,  wheji  walking  out  in  the  fields.  Then  I 
found  it  was  easy  to  suffer  any  thing,  if  Christ  was  with 
me.  But  O  without  him,  how  could  I  stand  the  storms  of 
this  world,  and  what  is  worse,  those  of  my  own  heart  ?  Yea> 
I  found  by  what  trials  and  persecutions  I  went  through,  <that 
it  was  hard  to  have  the  mind  in  such  a  frime,  as  to  suifer 
wholly  for  Christ.  As  for  the  pains  of  tht>  body,  whicli  I 
might  suffer  by  any  corporeal  punishment,  1  found  that  I 
could  sometimes  bear  and  endure  them,  with  a  resolute 
spint  of  the  gospel  in  exercise,  and  not  have  my  heart 
suitably  affected  with  the  spirit  of  Christ,  This  would  not 
be  suffering  for  Christ's  sake.  And  herein  I  believe  many 
arc  deceived  about  bearing  the  cross,  even  when  they  seem 
to  bear  it  patiently  without  reflection  and  resentment,  or 
any  desire  of  revenge  ;  bearing  trials  and  reproaches  bold- 
ly and  with  fortitude,  and  expect  a  reward,  when  tliey  are 
not  really  aiming  at  the  glory  of  God,  nor  truly  influenced 
with  his  Spirit  ;  that  spirit  of  tlie  blessed  Redeemer  and 
his  gospel  ;  which  they  ought  to  have,  to  bear  his  cross.      . 

7th.  The  vessel  that  I  had  been  waiting  for  to  go  to 
the  county  of  Cumberland  was  now  come  in.     I  went  ou 


134 


K-EV.  HENRT  ALLim.'s 


board  of  her,  aiid  the  same  day  we  sailed,  after  I  had  bid 
my  friends  farewell,  promising  to  return  to  them  as  soon 
as  possible.  We  lay  in  the  bason  of  Mines  all  that  night. 
About  midnight  there  was  a  terrible  thunder-storm,  but  the 
Lord  was  kind  to  me,  blessed  be  his  name  for  it. 

8  th.  On  Sabbath-day  I  got  to  Partridge -island,  and 
preached  there  about  seven  in  the  morning  to  what  people 
were  there.  They  were  about  20  in  number,  and  seemed 
to  give  great  attention  to  the  word  preached,  and  my  own 
soul  was  also  blessed.  And  great,  yea  great  was  God*s 
goodness  to  me.  O  that  I  could  love  him  with  all  my  soul ! 

9th.  I  RODE  through  tlie  woods  about  50  miles  to 
where  it  was  inhabited.  I  was  then  in  a  strange  place, 
where  I  never  had  been  before  :  but  O  the  Loixl  remem- 
bered his  poor  unworthy  servant,  and  gave  me  many  bles- 
sed moment^  when  riding  alone.  O  the  woi  th  of  an  invis- 
ible, kind,  infinite  and  uneliangeable  friend. 

10th.  The  people  heard  I  was  come  in,  and  therefore 
were  ready  to  attend  the  gospel.  I  preached  a  sermon, 
and  the  Lord  was  kind,  and  gave  a  blessing.  1  found  there 
some  sincere  christians,  who  knew  the  voice  of  the  gospel, 
and  rejoiced  to  hear  it,  and  blessed  God  that  he  had  sent  me. 

11th.  I  CROSSED  the  river  to  Amherst  point,  and 
preached  there  in  the  evening  ;  I  found  many  there,  who 
were  rejoicing  to  hear  the  gospel,  and  God  was  kind  to 
them,  and  blessed  their  souls  by  me.  O  that  I  may  always 
love  to  serve  God  and  his  children. 

12th.  Blessed  be  God  I  am  what  I  am,  and  ai^i  safe- 
ly conducted  wherever  I  go,  and  blessed  with  all  1  need  of 
this  world's  good,  and  some  blessings  the  world  knows  no- 
thing of.  O  the  sweetness  of  the  mercies  of  God,  when  it 
is  seen  and  felt  in  all  the  movings  of  his  hands.  O  that  I 
could  live  under  a  continual  sense  of  his  love  and  goodness, 
O  how  happy  should  I  be  i 

13th.  I  RODE  to  Fort  Lawrence,  and  preached  there 
in  the  evening,  and  God  was  there.  O  what  liberty  my 
soul  felt  to  proclaim  my  Redeemer's  name  and  his  gospel  ; 
Avhich  I  then  thought  and  still  think,  is  a  favourable  symp- 
tom of  God's  intended  goodness.  Many  people  both  chris- 
tians and  sinners  were  there  ;  and  that  night  the  work  of 
God  began.  The  christians  were  not  only  rejoicing  but 
many  sinners  were  taken  hold  of  by  the  Spirit  of  God. 

14th»  O  how  little  do  I  know  ai;i  enjoy  God  to  what 


I  had  bid 

I  as  £0on 
that  night, 
m,  but  the 

• 

sland,  and 
hat  people 
nd  seemed 
id  my  own 
was  God's 

II  my  soul  1 
0  miles  to 
inge  place, 
•I'd  remem- 
many  bles- 
of  an  invis- 

d  therefore 
a  sermon, 
found  there 
the  gospel, 
ad  sent  me. 
point, 
there,  who 
^as  kind  to 
may  always 


nd  aiii  safe- 
lU  I  need  of 
I  knows  no- 
od,  when  it 
,  O  that  1 
d  goodness . 

Lched  there 
liberty  my 
his  gcspel  ; 
•able  symp- 
;  both  chris  - 
he  work  of 
ijoicing  but 
of  God. 
od  to  what 


LIFE  A*'D  JOURNAL. 


135 


ard 


J  ought '.  I  am  amazed  that  any  one  day  can  be  spent  as 
this  was,  with  so  little  sense  of  divine  things  :  yet,  blessed 
be  God,  I  long  for  the  more  sweet  enjoyment  of  him. 

1 5th.  Tiiia  day  being  Sabbath  day,  such  a  number  of 
people  attended  that  I  was  obliged  ta  preach  in  the  open 
field.  O  it  was  a  day  of  God*s  powers  especially  amon%- 
the  christians,  who  began  to  travail  foi  souls.  My  own 
soui  had  also  a  blessing  granted  to  it. 

1 6th.  I  WENT  up  the  river  and  preached.  1  found  tiio 
Lord  still  with  me,  who  blessed  my  labours,  ihit  ah  I  havt: 
reason  to  be  ashamed,  that  I  have  no  more  love  and  grat- 
itude, when  I  am  so  much  indulged.  O  that  my  whole 
soul  was  awake.    . 

17th.  O  SHALL  I  say  that  I  walked  with  God  this  day., 
and  tliat  my  soul  was  conversing  with  him  as  v/itli  a  father. 
Yea,  happy  moments  my  soul  enjoyed  in  the  love  of  Jesus, 
O  that  1  could  live  with  him  thus  all  my  days.  In  the  c- 
vening  I  preached  again  in  the  fields. 

18th.  I  WENT  over  to  Fort  Lawrence,  found  my  soul 
a  live  in  God,  and  he  blessed  my  labours.  O  the  sweetness 
of  heavenly  joys  I  little  does  the  world  know  what  chriri- 
tians  enjoy  in  their  God.  Lord  ever  more  give  me  Xhm 
bread. 

19th.  I  PREACHED  this  day  near  the  garrison.  Some; 
of  the  officers  came  to  hear,  and  a  great  croud  of  people  of 
all  sorts.  And  O  what  a  desire  I  had,  yea  a  longing  desire 
that  God  woul  give  me  success  ;  and  I  trust  the  day  waa 
not  wholly  lost.  Some  were  blessed  with  light,  and  some 
with  love. 

20th  I  PREACHED  at  Mrs. ,  and  it  was  a  c\ay  of 

tiod's  pov/er.  The  people  thronged  with  hungry  souls  to 
hear  the  word.  The  glorious  gospel  of  Jesus  is  getting  a 
good  name  here  ;  and  let  me  serve  him  witli  all  my  soul. 

2fst.  I  PREACHED  this  day  at  2  o'clock  in  the  after- 
noon, and  then  rode  some  distance  and  preached  again  at  7 
in  the  evening.  I  enjoyed  this  day  some  happy  moments, 
and  some  trying  ones.  O  that  I  had  more  light,  love  and 
humility,  and  liberty  in  the  gospel. 

22d.  I  PREACHED  two  scrmons  this  day,  and  God  was 
kind  to  me  and  to  others.  Methinks  I  feel  willing  to  preach 
and  labour  until  I  die,  if  I  could  but  have  my  soul  at  the 
time  alive  with  God,  and  humbled  at  his  feet. 

23d.  I  RODK  much  this  day  and  preached  often,  and 


:i' 


iii 


13G 


»EV.  HtNRY  ALLXNE*S 


almost  every  sermon  to  those  who  had  heard  me  before,  and 
God  was  kind  to  me  and  to  the  people  and  a  blessing  at- 
tended by  labours  almost  at  every  sermon.  May  Jesus 
have  the  praise. 

24th.  Blp:ssed  moments  I  enjoyed  part  of  this  day, 
especially  wlien  preaching;.  But  ()  I  had  many  a  battle 
>vith  the  old  man  and  past  through  many  storms  ;  but  Je- 
j«us  my  Lord  was  kind  and  gave  me  the  victory.  And  one 
day  I  hope  and  trust  to  obtain  the  victory  fully,  yea  the  final 
conquest,  and  see  my  Captain  face  to  face  in  everlastinp;  joy. 

25th.  1  WKNT  with  some  cln'isUan  friends  to  Mci^iam- 
cook,  wh<n*c  there  was  a  boat  provided  for  us,  and  went  for- 
ty miles  the  same  day  up  the  river  Petit, Codiack,  intend- 
ing to  preach  in  all  the  villages  when  wc*return.  In  the 
evening  the  people  attendedi  a  sermon  and  God  gave  a 
blessing  to  some  souls. 

26th.  I  PREACHED  this  morning  to  tlcse  people  to 
whom  I  preached  last  evening :  then  went  ciown  the  river 
with  five  or  six  boats  in  company  ;  and  in  the  afternoon  I 
preached  again,  then  dismissed  the  people  and  appointed  a 
meeting  at  ten  at  night ;  when  they  almost  all  attended  a- 
gain,  and  seemed  hungry  for  the  word.  O  what  blessings 
my  soul  enjoyed  in  God  my  saviour,  yea,  and  he  blessed 
*me  with  a  longing  desire  to  spend  and  be  spent  in  his  bless- 
ed cause. 

>  *  27th.  I  ROSE  by  break  of  day  on  account  of  the  tide  j 
"we  sung  and  prayed  and  refreshed  our  bodies,  and  set  out 
to  go  lower  down  tlie  river,  and  stopt  at  the  lowest  village, 
Vvhere  J  liad  promised  to  stop  as  I  returned.  The  people 
were  chiefly  Germans,  Init  they  universally  attended,  and 
many  were  taken  hold  of  by  the  word.  Most  of  them  could 
understand  English  and  \vould  not  take  a  denial,  but  I  must 
visit  them  again  if  I  lived :  which  I  promised  I  would,  if 
ever  I  came  to  the  county  again.  ()  the  kindness  of  my 
God.  What  reason  have  1  to  love  him  for  his  goodness  to 
.me  and  to  others. 

28th»  i  GOT  three  men  more  to  go  with  me  to  Shepody.. 
'  1  enjoy<,^d  happy  moments  on  our  way.     We    would  often 
*ing  and  pray,  while  in  the  boat  and  God  was  with  us. 

29th.  SABBATifday.  The  people  being  informed  I 
was  come,  attended,  and  God  was  pleased  to  give  a  bless- 
ing. I  endeavoured  to  labour  and  pray  with  them,  the  lit.^ 
lie  time  I  was  there,  and  it  was  not  in  vain.     The  people 


LIFX  AND  JOURNAL. 


isr 


before,  and 
lessing  at- 
lay   Jesus 

this  day, 
y  a  battle 
i  but  Jc- 
And  one 
?a  the  final 
lusting;  joy. 
0  Mci^am- 
:1  went  for- 
:k,  intend- 
1.  In  the 
od  gave  a 

people  to 
5  the  river 
iftcrnoon  I 
ppointed  a 
ttended  a- 
t  blessings 
le  blessed 
n  his  bless- 

f  the  tide  j 
ind  set  out 
:st  viilaj^e, 
'he  people 
inded,  and 
hem  could 
but  I  must 
would,  if 
ess  of  my 
;oodness  to 

3  Shepody* 
fould  often 
th  us. 
n formed  I 
ve  a  bless - 
m,  the  lit^ 
he  people 


seemed  very  glad  of  an  opportunity  to  hear  the  gospel,  in- 
treating  me  to  return,  if  possible,  and  see  them  again.  O 
may  the  seeds  sown  never  be  plucked  up.  Lord,  bless  them', 
redeem  their  souls,  and  get  all  the  glory  to  thy  blessed 
name. 

30th.  About  three  in  the  morning  after  singing  and 
praying  we  set  out  on  our  return  to  Meriamcook,  got  there 
about  twelve,  and  after  some  refreshment  of  body  I  preach- 
ed there.  God  was  pleased  to  water  his  gospel,  especially 
ampng  the  young  people.  We  then  left  boat  and  took  our 
horses.  O  let  me  rejoice  and  bless  God  for  what  I  have 
seen  of  his  goodness  to  me,  and  success  of  his  gospel  in 
that  dark  corner  of  the  globe.  1  now  left  some  young  men, 
that  went  with  us  to  manage  the  boat.  And  O  what  a  de- 
sire I  had  that  God  would  reward  them  with  a  portion  far 
better  than  this  world.  Some  of  them  appeared  very  much 
awakened,  and  blessed  be  God,  before  I  left  the  county  of 
Cumberland,  one  of  them  was  brought  to  the  knowledge  of 
Jesus  :  and  I  expect  to  see  him  one  day  in  the  Kingdom  of 
Glon\  O  may  the  others  be  brought  in  likewise.  I  rod« 
to  Sackfield  to  C.  D.  Esq* 

31st.  This  day  after  visiting  some  people  I  preached 
in  the  evening,  and  God  was  there  with  such  power,  that 
some,  who  had  known  the  truth  before,  were  almost  over- 
come with  ipy.     O  that  I  could  love  him  more. 
The  month  is  gone  ;  vHat  have  I  done 

For  my  dear  Saviour'a  name  ^ 
What  shall  I  say,  what  shall  I  do, 

That  will  advance  his  fame  ? 
My  coldness,  O  my  God,  forgive,. 
And  every  weak  desire  receive. 
AvovsT  1st.  O  might  my  soul  now  be  inspired  with  grace,, 
To  spread  good  news  unto  the  fallen  race. 
O  Jesus,  lead  me  in  thy  blessed  name,  , 
To  be  successful  in  thy  bleeding  fa\ne  : 
And  let  me  serve  thee  with  my  heart  and  soul 
As  long  as  mortal  hours  and  moments  roll. 
Then  receive  mp  to  thy  bles^'d  abode, 
Where  1  for  ever  shall  enjoy  my  God, 

This  was  a  good  day  to  me,  especially  when  I 
preached.     God  blessed  my  labours  to  some  poor  souls. 

2d.  After  singing  and  praying  with  my  friends  in 
that  part  of  the  town,  I  rode  with  a  christian  man  about 
15  miles  and  preached.    O  how  my  soul  longed  for  liber-- 


\   ■*■  ■■ 


m 


ElV.  HEKKT  ALL|!fE*!» 


I 


1,  ^ 


"I 


ty.  It  seemed  as  if  I  could  not  live  so  any  lonj^er  ;  for  t 
just  began  to  know  the  worth  of  liberty.  O  that  my  bles- 
sed Jesus  would  bless  my  soul  with  much  of  his  love  and' 
presence. 

3d.  God  gave  me  this  day  some  liberty  of  soul.  I 
preached  with  some  success  to  some  of  the  capital  men 
of  that  placC)  who  began  to  listen  to  the  gospel  ;  and  som& 
of  the  officers  of  the  garrison  were  very  attentive.  One 
of  them,  after  sermon,  invited  me  to  dine  >vith  him  the 
[Monday  next :  and  when  I  went  I  was  treated  with  great 
civility.  He  acknowledged  the  truths  of  the  gospel,  and 
promised  me  whatever  assistance  I  wanted,  while  travel- 
ling in  that  county,  as  he  was  the  chief  commander.  He 
told  me,  he  had  heard  I  had  been  abused  by  one  of  his  un- 
der officers,  which  he  was  grieved  for.  He  told  me  fur- 
ther, that  I  should  not  have  an  insult  from  any  in  the  gar- 
rison, but  their  help,  if  I  needed  it.,  And  thus  I  saw,  that 
God  is  able  to  cause  all  things  to  work  together  for  the 
good  of  his  children  :  for  this  very  officer  had  letters  from 
other  officers  against  me,  and  was  desired  to  take  me  up, 
aod  although  he  had  no  real  religion,  yet  he  could  not  op- 
pose, but  encourage  the  gospel. 

4th,  The  church  now  began  to  gather  together  .in 
gospel  fellowship,  without  any  bars  or  separation  about  dif- 
ferent sects  or  denominations,  but  whoever  loved  and 
brought  Christ  and  belonged  to  him  were  freely  received 
into  full  communion.. 

5th.  This  was  a  day  of  God's  power.  I  preached 
three  times,  and  some  souls  were  set  at  liberty  by  the 
blood  of  the  Lamb,  and  brought  from  the  borders  of  eter- 
nal ruin  to  rejoice  in  the  wonders  of  redeeming  love.  A 
great  number  of  people  attended,  and  many  of  the  capital 
men.  O  the  desire  I  had  to  be  a  blessing  to  them  that 
day. 

6th.  Spent  some  time  in  the  garrison,  and  then  rode- 
about  fix  miles  and  preached  in  a  large  barn.  And  I  be-~ 
lieve,  that  Jesus  was  there.  O  the  sweetness  ol  being  withi 
Jesus.  O  may  it  be  forever  my  lot  and  portion  to  enjoy 
him. 

7th.  I  COULD  not  find  this  day  that  liberty  my  soul 
longed  for»  My  soul  seemed  like  a  stranger  here,  and  was 
\g6pt  in  fetters  and  in  prison  against  |ny  will.  O  I  longed 
to  get  the  victory  over  sin,  and  could  say  with  Sampson,  O 


\ 


LIFE  ANn  JOUR*fAL. 


139 


r ;  for  t 
ny  bles- 
love  and' 

soul.     I 
:al  men 
nd  some 
B.    One 
him  the 
ith  great 
ipel,  and 
;  travel- 
er.    He 
f  his  un- 
me  fiir- 
the  gar- 
jaw,  that 
for  the 
ers  from 
e  me  np, 
i  not  op-- 

jether.in 
bout  dif- 
ved  and 
received 

^reached 
by  the 

of  eter- 
10  ve.  A 
capital 

;m  that 

len  rode- 

Id  I  be-. 

ig  withi 

enjoy 

ly  soul 

md  was 

longed 

)son,  O 


Lord,  give  me  strcnf^th  this  once,  that  I  may  be  avenged 
on  the  Philistines,  for  my  two  eyes  :  for  there  is  nothing, 
no  nothing  so  great  a  burthen  to  me  as  darkness  and  sin. 

8th.  This  morning  I  set  out  with  about  20  people  oi> 
horseback  to  the  Bay  Veid»  We  sung  and  prayed  on  the 
road,  and  when  v/e  came  there,  I  preached  in  the  after- 
noon and  in  the  evening,  and  God  gave  a  blessings  The 
people  desired  mt  to  remain  all  night,  and  preach  again  m 
tiie  morning,  which  I  did,  and  God  was  tlitre. 

9th.  After  I  had  preached  and  prayed,  we  took  leave 
of  the  people,  and  returned  back  to  Cumberland.  But  Q 
the  trying  hours  I  had  on  my  mind  this  evening  on  ac- 
count of  darkness. 

10th.  This  was  a  good  day  to  me,  especially  in  the 
evening,  when  being  wearied  in  body,  I  told  my  friends  I 
must  go  to  my  bed  as  soon  as  I  could  :  but  in  prayer  it 
pleased  God  to  come  with  such  power,  that  some  in  the 
room  who  before  had  been  careless,  were  takon  hold  oF 
and  roared  out  for  mercy  :  and  there  were  three  souls 
brought  out  rejoicing  that  night ;  oneof  which  was  a  young 
lady,  who  was  dressed  with  her  high  head,  and  other  su- 
perfluous ornaments,  who  was  taken  hold  of  with  such 
power,  that  she  never  ceased  crying  for  mercy  in  the 
greatest  agony  of  soul,  till  she  was  delivered,  and  I  think 
brought  into  as  great  Uberty  as  ever  I  saw  any  one  in  so 
short  a  time.  (And  although  the  powers  of  antichrist 
fight  hard  against  such  sudden  and  powerful  conversions, 
yet,  blessed  be  God,  I  was  naw  an  eye-witness  of  one 
brought  from  a  careless  state  to  the  triumph  of  faith  in 
about  two  hours,  and  as  I  have  known  her  since,  she  con- 
tinues toDe"a  remarkable  ornament  to  the  gospel  she  pro- 
fesses. Many  more  I  have  known  brought  through  very 
suddenly  (who  provf  cl  hy  their  christian  walk,  to  be  sin- 
cere) though  not  so  siidden  as  she  was  ;  but  I  believe  ma- 
ny have  been  more  instantaneous.)  And  O  what  a  bles*. 
sed  night  that  was.  Some  were  praying,  and  some  prais- 
ing with  a  loud  voice  and  sincerity  of  soul  all  the  nights 
As  for  my  own  part,  I  never  closed  my  eyes  to  sleep  rill 
the  next  day.  O  that  I  had  a  heart  to  give  the  glory  to  my^ 
blessed  master  I 

1 1th.  This  day  I  had  some  happy  moments  in  preach- 
ing, but  about  twelve  of  the  clock  at  night,  being  in  my 
bed-coom  alone,  I  heard  some  young  people  praying  and 


140. 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


* 


:M 


groaning  with  bitter  groans  for  meicy,  and  pleading  for  one 
drop  of  the  blood  of  Christ  to  wash  away  their  sins,  which 
so  affected  mc,  that  I  could  not  close  my  eyes  all  night  to 
irleep,  being  under  such  a  sense  of  the  deplorable  condition 
of  the  unconverted,  hearing  them  (as  I  went  out  of  the 
room)  express  their  miserable  danger  approaching,  and 
lost  and  undone  condition,  while  out  of  Christ,  in  so  great 
agonies  and  distress,  as  if  they  were  just  plunging  into 
eternity  and  ruin.  O  the  wretched  state,  that  sinners  are 
in,  and  do  not  know  it ! 

12th.  1  preached  three  sermons  this  day,  and  God 
brought  some  souls  to  Christ,  and  many  christians  to  re- 
joice in  great  liberty.  I'he  hearers  were  so  numerous, 
that  I  was  obliged  to  preach  in  the  fields.  O  how  my  soul 
travailed,  wliile  speaking,  when  I  beheld  many  groaning 
under  almost  insupportable  burthens,  and  crying  out  for 
mercy.  This  day  the  church  met  to  receive  members,  and 
according  as  I  had  advised  tliem,  no  mention  was  made,  of 
I  what  think  ye  of  Paul,  Apollos,  or  Cephas ;  but  what  think 
ye  of  Christ.  O  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost  that  was 
among  the  people  this  day.  A  number  joined  the  church, 
and  some  sinners  v,  ere  brought  to  re j nice  in  Jesus  Christ 
their  friend. 

14th.  O  THE  heavy  moments  I  went  through  part  of 
this  day,  mourning  the  absence  of  God  my  friend.  O  dark- 
ness, darkness,  how  can  I  bear  it  ?  when,  O  wtien  will  God 
^-eturn  ?  However  God  was  kind  to  me,  and  did  not  leave 
me  long  in  the  dark.  In  the  evening  I  rode  about  six 
miles  and  preached.  After  which  I  set  out  with  about  twen- 
ty people  on  horseback.  We  s\ing  as  we  were  riding,  then 
prayed  and  then  sung  again  ;  and  when  singing,  the  Lord 
was  pleased  to  set  one  mourning  soul  at  liberty,  who  was 
about  forty  years  of  age. 

15th.  I  RODE  with  a  number  of  people  to  Sackfield, 
but  did  not  enjoy  that  love  and  liberty  of  soul,  as  sometimes 
I  do.  O  what  a  grief  it  is  to  think  that  I  should  be  dark 
'4nd  cold,  when  I  am  in  the  cause  of  God,  and  the  Re- 
deemer's work  reviving.  O  how  can  I  be  so  cold  ;  why  is 
not  my  whole  soul  awake  with  love  and  gratitude  in  praises 
to  mv  God. 

16th.  This  day  the  church  met,  and  about  twenty 
were  added  to  it.  It  was  a  blessed  day  to  my  soul,  espe- 
cially at  about  eight  o'clock  in  the  evening  : .  when  speak- 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


Ul 


for  one 
,  which 
ught  to 
>ndition 
of  the 
ig,  and 
io  great 
mg  into 
lers  are 

nd  God 

is  to  re- 
merous, 
my  soul 
;roaning 
out  for 
)ers,  and 
made,  of 
lat  think 
that  was 
;  church, 
[S  Christ 

h  part  of 
O  dark- 
will  Cod 
not  leave 
about  six 
lOUt  twen- 
ling,  then 
the  Lord 
who  was 

Sackfield, 
ometimes 
Id  be  dark 
the  Re- 
l ;  why  is 
in  praises 


ut  twenty 
soul,  espe- 
li  en  speak- 


ing to  the  christians,  my  whole  soul  was  so  ravished  with 
the  love  of  Jesus,  thai  1  could  scarcely  speak  ;  yea, my  very 
heart  seemed  melted  with  love.  O  the  love,  the  infinite 
love  of  my  God  I  Hovt  is  my  soul  on  the  wing  when  1  have 
but  one  glimpse  of  that  sacred  love  :  and  if  one  glimpse  is 
so  great  and  transporting,  what  will  it  be  to  swim  forever 
in  the  infinite  ocean,  and  notliing  to  annoy.  O  my  Jesus, 
shall  I  ever  be  so  happy  ;  shall  1  one  day  awake  in  perfect 
joy  with  thee  ?  O  it  is  all  I  want,  and  all  I  need.  Give  it 
to  me,  O  my  God,  and  thine  be  the  glory,  for  ever.  Amen. 

17th.  Preached  at  five  in  the  morning,  and  God  was 
there  of  a  truth.  We  then  sung  and  prayed  in  the  street, 
after  which  I  left  the  people,  rode  ten  miles,  and  then 
preached  again.  And  O  what  shall  I  say  ?  my  heart  longs 
to  acknowledge  the  goodness  of  God  to  the  wretched  chil- 
dren of  men.  My  heart  and  soul  was  at  liberty,  and  some 
blessings  were  sent  by  mc.  I  then  rode  a  mile,  and  preach- 
ed in  the  evening  ;  and  the  Lord  still  continued  his  good- 
ness. After  sermon  my  heart  leaped  for  joy  to  have  an 
old  judge,  who  had  been  also  a  major  in  the  king's  service^ 
come  and  take  me  by  the  hand,  telling  me,  wifth  t^ars  in  his 
eyes,  I  am  happy  to  see  you  once  more.  I  repl.ed,  I  hope 
1  shall  be  so  happy  as  to  see  you  a  brother  in  Christ,  and 
enjoy  an  everlasting  day  with  you.  He  answered,  I 
kope  I  shall ;  for,  blessed  be  God,  I  am  now  convinced  that 
I  have  been  all  my  days  in  the  drirk,  and  that  this  is  the  on- 
ly way  to  eternal  life  and  happiness.  God  grant,  said  I, 
thai  you  may  be  brought  out  and  become  a  father  in  IsraeL 
1  hope  I  shall,  replied  he,  although  in  the  eleventh  hour. 

18th.  I  HAD  this  day  some  darkness  and  someUghtin 
my  own  soul.  O  what  on  uneven  walk  is  the  christian's 
walk  tlu'ough  this  wilderness  state.  O  what  a  mystery  1 
am  to  myself !  When  I  get  near  to  God,  I  can  hardly 
think  1  shall  see  such  times  again.  But  O  my  master 
changes  not.  I  preached  in  the  evening,  and  a  number 
more  joined  the  church. 

19th.  O  what  a  day  of  joy  was  this  to  the  christians  t 
The  church  partook  of  the  sacrament  of  the  Lord's  Sup- 
per. Many  of  them  were  as  full  of  love  as  they  could  con- 
tain, both  under  the  sermon  and  at  the  table,  and  seven 
souls  were,  I  believe,  born  to  Christ  this  day.  O  the  shout* 
of  praise  that  were  heard  among  the  christians,  both  old 
^d  young  !  Many  sinners  were  groaning  under  the  burthea 


X 


/ 


14) 


KKVr  IIENBV  ALLINK's 


- 

1*    . 

1 

1 

1 

I 

i-  ■ 

, 

f*  '1 

t 

I;      I 


'i!^ 


ii 


i 


M 


of  their  sins,  and  pleading  for  mercy,  and  for  the  blood  o^ 
Christ  with  unspeakable  agonies  of  soul.  O  may  Jesus 
bring  them  tli rough  to  share  with  us,  and  forever  join  ts 
glorify  his  blessed  name. 

20th.  I  uoDE  "with  fifteen  in  company  about  ten  miles, 
crossd  a  river,  and  preached.     I  found  God  still  working 
with  jyjwer.     Three  precious  and  immortal   souls  were 
brought  out  rejoicing,  and  many  more  begging  for  rzwcy. 
Publicans  and  harlots  enter  the  kingdom  before  the  phaii- 
sees.     One  who  had  been  an  officer's  wife,  was  brought 
from  deep  distress,  even  the  borders  of  despair,  to  rejoice 
in  the  blessed  Redeemer.     O  what  a  wonder  of  wonders  to 
see  the  offscourings  of  all  things,  who  have  long  been  wa!- 
iowing  in  wickedness,  married  to  the  spotless  Lamb  of  God, 
received  into  his  embraces,  rejoicing  in  his   smiles   and 
made  heirs  of  everlasting  love.     Yea  it  is  no  wonder  that 
scribes  and  pharisees  think  strange  (and  the  gospel  becomes 
a  stumbling  block  to   them)  to  see  such  wicked  creatures 
return  to  God  and  rejoice  in  his  love,  when  they  have  lived 
so  long  and  lalioured  so  much,  and  still  remain  strangers  to 
the  true  peace  of  conscience  and  joy  in  the  Holy  Ghotit. 
Yea,  when  those,  that  are  brought  from  such   a  life  of  de- " 
bauchery,   declare  what  they  have  found,   what  they  enjoy 
of  God,  and  v/hat  they  think  of  the  moralists  (as  young  con- 
verts are  very  apt  to  do)  how  hard  is  it  for  the  moralists  tO' 
believe  them >  who  have  been  so  lontr  members  of  churches, 
and  are  advocates  in  the  externals  of  religion.     What,  say 
they,  thou  wast  altogether  born  in  sin,  and  dost  thou  teach 
\is  ?   O  the  mystery  of  the  gospel,  and  the  blindness  of  the 
natural  man. 

2 1st.  I  PREACHED  a  scrmon  this  morning  to  a  large- 
number  and  bid  them  farewell.  I  think  their  souls  were  ' 
brought  to  rejoice  in  God,  and  the  christians  greatly  reviv- 
ed. As  for  my  own  part  I  was  so  filled  with  love  to  God  and 
to  his  childrea  (when  we  seemed  all  wrapped  up  in  unity 
of  the  Spirit  and  bonds  of  peace)  that  my  heart  was  ready 
to  burstj  and  sometimes  ready  to  cry  out  in  the  language 
of  the  spouse,  Stay  me  with  flagons,  comfort  me  with  ap- 
ples, for  1  am  sick  of  love.  A  nd  when  I  left  them,  I  eould 
hardly  speak,  although  not  with  grief,  for  I  could  leave 
them  freely,  but  was  so  affected  with  what  I  saw  and  felt 
©f  God*S  love  and  goodness  ;  and  to  think  I  should  one  day 
meet  them  in  glory,to  love  and  praise  my  God  to  all  etemi*  ' 


blood  oir 
y  Jesus 
join 


te 


n  miles, 
working 
Is  were 
r:''vcy. 
i  phari- 
brought 
rejoice 
iders  to 
en  >val- 
ofGod, 
les  and 
ler  ihut 
ccomes 
'eatures 
ve  lived 
igers  to 
Ghotit. 
;  of  de- 
y  enjoy 
ng  con- 
alists  to 
lUrchcs, 
lilt,  say 
u  teach 
3  of  the 

a  large' 
s  were 
r  reviv- 
iod  and 
1  nnily 
i  ready 
iguage 
ith  ap- 
I  eould 
leave 
nd  felt 
ne  day 
etemi* 


LIFK  AND  JOURKAl.. 


443 


ly,  bore  my  soul  above  the  world.  I  then  rode  to  Partritlgc 
Island,  and  O  the  happy  moments  I  had  on  the  way  1  Me- 
thinks  I  cowld  say,  1  conversed  with  God  as  with  a  friend. 

22d.  This  morning  about  break  of  day  I  was  called 
out  of  my  bed,  and  carried  on  board  a  privateer,  but  not  out 
of  any  ill  will  to  me,  only  they  found,  there  was  such  a  man 
there  with  a  horse,  and  they,  intending  to  take  some  vessels 
from  out  of  the  bason,  were  afraid  that  I  should  carry  back 
intelligence  to  Cumberland  before  they  had  got  ready  to 
sail  from  that  harbour.  When  I  came  on  board,  the  cap- 
tain told  me  I  should  suffer  no  injury,  but  have  whatever  I 
wanted,  and  be  put  ashore  again  as  soon  us  tlicy  could, 
which  accordingly  they  did  in  the  evening,  after  they  had 
tal^en  three  prizes.  Let  them  that  wish  well  to  their  souls 
flee  from  privateers  as  they  would  from  the  jawe  of  hell, 
for  methinks  a  privateer  may  be  called  a  floating  hell. 

23d.  I  ENJOYED  this  day  sonic  happy  moments  at  my 
pen  and  likewise  in  my  private  walks  about  the  Island,  X 
must  acknowledge,  the  kindness  of  God  to  me  is  great,  yea 
very  great,  and  his  tender  mercies  are  over  all  his  works. 
O  that  I  had  no  other  Gods  but  him,  and  could  serve  him 
with  all  my  soul,  and  enjoy  him  for  ever  ! 

24th.  O  THE  sweetness  of  trusting  in  God  t  We  often 
say,  we  trust  in  God  and  depend  on  him,  when  we  are  far 
from  it,  and  only  give  a  stupid  assent.  And  herein,  I  be> 
lieve  thousands  and  thousands  are  deceived  even  in  their 
own  salvation.  They  say  they  believe  in  Christ,  trust  in 
God,  depen<.  only  on  free  grace  and  the  blood  of  Christ, 
and  they  wait  for  the  mercy  of  God,  and  if  they  pericsh  they 
will  perish  at  Christ's  feet ;  and  at  the  same  time  it  is  only 
from  the  lips  outward  (if  I  may  vulgarly  express  myself) 
but  the  heart  knows  nothing  of  all  this,  and  remains  both 
ignorant  and  careless,  yea  and  many  go  down  to  the  grave 
with  those  expressions  in  their  months,  while  the  devil 
r«igns  in  their  hearts,  and  so  plunge  themselves  into  eter- 
nal ruin.  O  Lord,  undeceive  poor  precious  and  immortal 
souls. 

25th.  I  WAS  this  day  in  an  open  boat  put  across  the 
bason  to  Horton,  and  left  my  horse  behind  me  on  Partridge 
island,  the  ferry-boat  not  being  there. 

26th.  I  PREACHED  this  day  t\vic«  in  Horton  court-house, 
and  in  the  evening  at  the  house  of  major  H.  and  was  oftci\ 
blest  with  great  freedom^  in  proclaiming'\he  blessed  name 


\  % 


ii 


I; 


V:-r 


144 


lEV.  MKNRY   ALLINE's 


«f  ^csus,  and  his  glorious  gospel.     In  n^y  private  ho\irs  the 
Lord  was  all  my  joy. 

Jesus,  my  Lord,  I  call  thcc  mine  ;  '  -      * 

I  feci  thy  word  that  makes  me  thine. 
Now  on  me  gird  the  gospel  sword,  ^ 

AVith  ilie  whole  armour  of  thy  word,  ^ 

To  spreail  the  wonders  of  thy  grace  abroad,     j 

29th.  After  being  hi  Hortoii  three  days,  I  went  this 
day  to  Cornwallis,  wliere  I  stayed  seven  days,  and  happy 
days  they  were.  Many  of  the  christians  were  so  carried 
away  at  the  meetings,  that  they  coidd  not  contain  from  cry- 
ing out  ;  but  that  was  with  great  offence  to  the  Pharisees. 
O  that  they  would  throw  down  their  rebellion,  and  the 
weapons  thereof,  and  come  and  partake  with  us  the  glo- 
rious feasts  of  the  christians. 

September  5th.  I  went  to  Horton,  preached  there 
in  the  evening,  and  my  soul  and  those  of  others  were  fed, 
having  many  happy  moments  in  the  enioyment  of  God, 
and  the  presence  of  Jesus. 

6th.  This  day  I  went  to  Falmoutl  ^  ..ere  I  had  not 
been  for  some  time,  found  many  friends  well,  and  rejoicing 
in  the  Lord.  I  preached  the  same  evening,  when  a  num- 
ber of  ruffians  came,  some  under  the  >vindows,  and  some  in 
the  door,  howling  and  making  all  manner  of  noise  to  scoff 
at  and  ridicule  us.  After  sermon  a  yo»ing  discipte  of 
Christ  arose  and  spoke  to  them,  warning  them  in  the  name 
of  the  Lord  of  Hosts  (who,  he  told  them,  was  viewing  all 
their  conduct,  and  heard  their  blasphemy)  of  their  danger, 
telling  them,  that  it  was  not  the  people  they  were  scofTing 
'  at  ancl  despising,  but  the  spirit  of  the  meek  and  lov.ly  Je- 
sus, the  eternal  Son  of  God,  who  died  for  their  wretched 
souls,  that  they  were  making  a  mock  of  and  blaspheming. 
As  for  us,  added  he,  we  do  not  regard  how  much  you  des- 
pisg  and  reproach  us ;  but  for  your  sours  sake,  do  not 
make  a  mock  of  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ. 

8th.  I  went  to  Newport,  and  I  cannot  say,  but  I  en- 
joyed some  happiness  at  times  in  my  own  soul.  But  O 
what  hard  preaching  to  such  a  dead  people  I  Tho-  gospel 
seems  to  slip  by  them  without  any  more  impression  on 
them,  than  water  upon  glass.  A  large  place,  with  many 
inhabitants,  and  at  that  time  I  fear  but  about  five  or  six 
that  were  real  Christians  in  it.  O  what  a  miserable  con- 
dition to  the  gospel-hardened,  to  hear  the  gospel,  and  to 
consent  to  tlie  truths,  without  any  feeling  or  concern. 


CfF£  AND  JOtJRlfAI.. 


H6 


ours  the 


,vcnt  this 
a  happy 

0  carried 
rom  cry- 
Miarisecs. 

and    the 
the   glo- 

hed  there 
were  fed, 
;  of  God, 

1  had  not 
i  rejoicing 
en  a  num- 
id  some  iri 
se  to  scoff 
liscipte  of 
\  the  name 
iewing   all 
;ir  danger, 
re  scoffing 

lov/ly  Je- 

wretched 

pheming. 

you  des- 

|ke,  do  not 

but  I  en- 
il.  But  O 
|ht>  gospel 
•ession  on 
•ith  many 
ive  or  six 
irable  con- 
Lel,  and  to 
Icern. 


I3tii.  I  WENT  to  Windsor,  wliere  I  enjoyed  happy 
'moments  in  my  soul,  and  was  enabled  to  triumph  over  all 
my  trials,  and  rejoice  in  J<5sus  my  friend.  Blessed  be  God, 
when  at  Windsor,  I  had  the  happiness  to  see  a  woman, 
who  had  come  fourteen  miles  to  hear  the  gospel,  delivered 
from  the  bondage  of  sin,  and  the  borders  of  eternal  perdi- 
tion, and  brought  to  the  glorious  liberty  of  the  children  of 
God.  She  was  so  overjoyed,  that  she  could  not  contain, 
but  cried  out  in  divine  raptures,  with  shouts  of  praise  to 
God,  pnd  exhorting  souls  to  come  and  share  with  her.  I 
continued  preaching  and  visiting  my  friends,  with  whom  I 
-enjoyed  many  happy  days,  until  the  24th,  and  then  1  took 
leave  of  them  for  a  season,  intending,  if  Providence  per^ 
mit,  to  go  round  to  Cape  Orsue  and  Cape  Sable,  where  T 
never  had  been. 

24th.  I  WENT  to  Hortonand  preached  there  the  same 
evening  to  a  great  crowd  of  people  ;  staid  there  and 
.preached  again  the  iiext  evening.  O  the  sweetness  of  la- 
bouring in  Christ's  kingdom.  I  preached  twice  or  three 
times  almost  every  day.  The  more  I  preached,  the  mor« 
J  loved  it  and  longed  to  proclaim  the  name  of  Jesus  to  th« 
whole  world. 

26th.  I  WENT  to  Cornwallis  and  preached  there  inth« 
evening  to  a  crowd  of  people  :  for  my  custom  was  to  send 
word  what  hour  I  would  be  there. 

28th.  I  LEFT  Cornwallis,  and  rode  twenty  miles  of 
.my  way  to  Annapolis.  O  the  sweet  moments  1  enjoyed 
while  I  was  riding,  Jesus  has  so  often  blessed  me,  that  I 
^enjoyed  sometimes  I leaven  while  I  was  riding  on  earth. 
O  my  soul,  ever  love  and  adore  such  a  friend,  for  he  is  all 
my  life,  all  my  strength,  all  my  joy,  and  stands  by  me, 
wherever  I  go.  When  I  came  to  Wilmot,  I  stopped  and 
preached  there,  and  always  found  the  lovcof  God  free  and 
'his  spirit  ready,  whenever  my  heart  was  open  to  receive  it. 
Then  Lord,  with  all  my  soul  I'll  comTS 

And  cast  myselF  on  thee. 
O  lead  me  till  I  reach  my  home, 
From  sin  and  sorrow  n-ee. 

I  REMAINED  some  days  there  and  in  Annapolis  court* 
!ty  and  preached  often  to  great  crowds  of  people,  and  often 
«aw  the  power  of  God  among  the  hearers,  especially  a^ 
anong  the  christians,  who  were  very  lively,  and  many  c>{ 
«theHi  rejoicing  in  triumph, 

,  N 


i 


i46 


HIV.  KENRT  ALLINE^S 


October  10th.  I  rode  with  a  young  man  in  com- 
pany  as  far  as  Annapolrs  bason,  and  the  next  day  to  St. 
Mary's  bay.  There  I  found  a  disciple  of  Jesus  Christ*  I 
staid  one  night  with  him  and  his  wife  in  their  little  cot- 
tage, and  was  as  happy  with  them  in  it  as  in  a  palace.  The 
next  day  the  man  and  his  wife  went  with  me,  in  a  boat,  a- 
bout  twelve  miles,  where  I  expected  to  stop  and  preach, 
five  or  six  families  being  there.  When  I  came,  I  found 
there  two  of  the  dear  children  of  God.  I  thought  to  have 
gone  trom  there  before  the  Sabbath,  but  could  not,  for  the 
two  men  I  had  hired  for  that  |*irpose  disappointed  me, 
and  I  had  reason  to  bless  God  that  it  was  so,  for  I  preached 
the  more  among  those  poor  people.  Some  of  them  were 
greatly  awakenec,  and  in  a  >hort  time  there  were  three  of 
them  converted,  I  trust,  and  came,  out  rejoicing  in  God 
their  Saviour.  I  preached,  and  talked^  and  laboured  with 
the  people  all  the  time  I  was  there,  and  Gctl  blessed  my 
endeavours.  O  that  I  might  ever  live  under  a  sense  of  his 
goodness,  rejoice  iji  his  love,  and  proclaim  his  name. 

18th.  1  WKNT  in  a  small  boat  with    two  men  I   had 
hired  to  carry  me  to  Cape  Orsue.     We   went  but  about 
six  or  seven  miles  that  night,  and  staid  with   the  French. 
The  next  moming  we  set  out  early  with  a  fair  wind,  but 
when  we  came  to  a  mountain,  the  wind  was  so  high,  that 
the  men  were  afraid  to  go  round  the  cape.     I  told  them  I 
had  rather  undertake  to  travel  on  foot  than  wait  for  an  op- 
portunity to  go  by  water.     We  travelled  this  day  fourteen 
miles  :  the  next  moniing  one  of  the  men  was  taken  so  ill, 
that  he  could  not  travel  ;  for  we  were  obliged  to  leave  him 
in  the  camp,  while  the  other  man  went  with  me  to  the  set- 
tlements, and  returned  witli  things  for  him.     But  he  soon 
recovered.     I  travelled  that  day  until   it  seemed  as  if  I 
should  drop  dow'n  with  weariness  ;  for  it  was  some  of  ray 
first  travelling  on  foot.     I  was  so  wearied,  that   I   was  o- 
bliged  to  lean  on  the  man's   arm  as  I   walked.     I   could 
hardly  draw  my  feet  after  me,  and  we  had  nothing  with  us 
to  eat,  when  we  stopped,  for  we  leu  what  we  had  with  the 
sick  man,  expecting  we  should  get  in  before   we   should 
want.     />  s  I  was  thus  labouring,  a  remarkable  instance  of 
Providence  happened.     I  asked  the  man  how  far  we  had  to 
travel.     He  replied  nine  miles.     I  told  him  1   should  not 
get  in  that  night.     He  said  he  would  go  in  and  fetch  me  a 
hoi'se  for  the  rest  of  the  way.     Soon  after  he  had  spok« 


trFii  ANIX   JOURNAL. 


1 47 


these  words,  we  espied  five  or  six  horses  on  the  beach,  that 
had  come  out  so  t"ai»  from  the  the  settlements,  and  witit- 
much  trouble  we  caught  two  of  them,  with  an  intent  to  pay 
the  owners  for  the  use  of  them  when  we  got  in  ;  and  wc 
got  in  without  much  more  trouble.  When  we  got  to  Cape 
Orsue  I  found  the  people  very  dark,  and  most  of  them  op- 
posers  to  the  power  of  Religion.  The  minister  also  at 
Chibogue  came  out  and  raged  very  high.  Nevertheless 
there  were  doors  opened  for  me,  and  I  preached  often 
while  I  was  there,  and  some  were  awakened.  The  minis- 
ter raged  sO'to  my  face,  that  I  was  obliged  to  tell  him,  that 
allowing  I  was  ever  so  wroug,  and  was  going  to  destruction, 
it  was  certain  he  was  wrong,  for  he  had  discovered  a  mur- 
dering spirit  in  that  rage  and  wrangling,  which  I  told  him 
was  far  from  the  spirit  and  ways  of  Jesus  ;  and  at  last  liis 
passion  was  so  high,  that  he  left  the  house.  When  he  was 
gone,  his  deacon,  at  whose  house  I  was,  vas  so  convinced, 
that  '.  e  told  me  his  house  was  open  for  me  at  any  time«  I 
travelled  to  Argyle  and  had  some  happy  momeets  on  the 
way  in  the  enjoyment  of  Jesus  my  blessed  master.  When 
I  came  there,  many  of  the  people  seemed  to  be  afraid  of 
me  ;  but  God  soon  began  to  work  by  his  Spirit,  which 
caused  some  to  rejoice,  and  othera  to  cry  out  under  a  sense 
of  their  sins.^  O  my  soul  could  now  rejoice,  seeing  the 
work  of  God  beginning  in  that  dark  place.  Often  have  I 
rose  before  day,  and  walked  in  the  fields  with  joy,  and  I 
had  much  of  the  presence  of  God  in  speaking.  Some 
christians  that  had  long  been  in  captivity,  and  were  very 
dark,  were  enlivened,  came  out  in  public,  and  witnessed  for 
the  Lord  Jesus  Christ,  and  his  gospel.  O  the  happy  hours 
jny  soul  enjoyed  in.  that  place,  both  in  public  and  private. 
Ah,  I  can  say  that  I  am  in  heaven,  when  I  enjoy  Christ, 
Let  me  be  where  I  will,  he  is  my  life,  he  is  my  peace,  he 
is  my  joy  ;  yea,  he  is  all  that  can  be  enjoyed,  and  all  that  I 
ever  expect  or  desire  to  enjoy,  both  for  time  and  for  eter- 
nity. O  that  I  could  always  live  in  a  feeling  sense  of  his 
love  and  presence  all  my  days.  The  people  being  much 
engaged  and  awakened,  were  with  me  continually,  so  that 
I  was  preaching,  praying,  exhorting  or  discoursing,  almost 
all  the  lime,  frotn  early  in  the  morning,  till  twelve  at 
night. 

November  6th.  I  went  down  to  Barrington,  where 
I  found  the  people  very  dark,  yet  they  grv©  attention,  and 
soon  began  to  be  something  awakened. 


1 

'  '' 

f 

i-' 


}l' 


I      i 


n^ 


1^43; 


REV.  HENRY  ALUNE'S 


1  Itb.  I  WENT  on  board  of  a  small  schooner  to  go  tav 
Liverpool,  sailed  all  night,  and  was  taken  in  the  morning  by 
an  American  privateer,  carried  back  and  put  ashore  where 
ive  sailed  Irom,  which  afterwards  I  was  rejoiced  for.  I 
now  went  by  land,  and  so  preached  to  many  little  settle- 
ments, which  I  should  have  passed  by.. 

14th.  I  WKNT  to  port  la  Tore  and  preached  the  same 
evening.  From  thence  I  went  to  port  Rosaway  and 
preached  there  until  the  20th,  when  I  went  to  the  Ragged 
islands,  where  I  found  a  dear  cLild  of  God,  who  very  much 
rejoiced  at  hearing  tliC  gospel.  Some  sinners  vere  like- 
wise awakened,  and  I  enjoyed  happy  hours  in  my  own  soul. 

0  the  happiness  of  walking  with  Jesus  !•  What  can  be  com- 
pared with  one  moment  in  his  sensible  presence  ?  Lord, 
ever  keep  nigh  to  thee,  and  humble  at  thy  feet. 

22d.  I  WEKT  to  Sable  river,  where  1  found  a  very  dark 
people.  I  was  enabled  to  labour  with  them  both  in  public 
and  private. ,  O  that  they  would  consider  that  their  preci- 
ous souls  might  be  saved.  There  were  many  on  that 
shore,  that  had  not  heard  a  sermon  for  fourteen  years 
preached  unto  them.  Only  sometimes  one  of  their  readei's 
%vould  come  along  and  read  a  sermon  to  them.  O  the  dark 
miserable  state  of  poor  sinners  !  What  heart  that  has  felt 
the  woi  th  of  souls  can  forbear  to  weep  over  them.  O  Je- 
sus, send  thy  faithful  heralds  to  labour  for  their  salvation,, 
and  bring  them  to  thyself. 

By  thine  own  voice  call  forth  the  dead, 

And  feed  them  with  immortal  bread. 

Take  me,  O  Lord,  into  thy  blessed  arms, 
^         And' hold  me  up  to  teadi  the  world  thy  charms, . 
•  O  may  I  bear  thy  messages  of  peace 

To  wretched  souls,  till  mortal  hfe  shall  cease. 

December  \  1th.  I  landed  at  Liverpool,  where  I  found; 

a  kind  people,  but  in  midnight  darkness,  and  vastly  given 

to  frolicking,  rioting  and  all  manner  of  levity.     When  I 

first  preached  among  them,  I  had  but  little  encouragement. 

1  staid  among  them  until  the  I5th,  when  I  took  a  passage 
for  Port  Midway  and  Port  Levy,  where  I  found  great  atten- 
tion, and  I  myself  enjoyed  happy  hours  in  delivering  the 
messajjes  of  the  Lord  ;  but  there  was  not  one  that  appear- 
ed to  have  any  knowledge  of  Christ.  .  nd  O  how  many 
perish  after  being  awakened  by  restinp:  on  their  awaken • 
ipigs,  and  take  up  with  conviction  for  conversion. 

24th,,  I  RETURNED  to  PoFt  Midway  and  went  up  tht; 


%i 


'^Z  AND  JOURNAL. 


1      149 


A 


Falls  to  the  mills  and  preached  there  the  next  d^y.  Then 
travelled  through  the  woods  to  Liverpool,  where  I  preach- 
ed again  in  different  places,  and  found  some  little  movings 
among  the  people.  Some  began  to  fear  their  foundation 
to  be  wrong  who  had  been  professors  ;  and  the  Lord  gav» 
me  streng^th  and  liberty  to  declare  the  truths  of  the  gospel ; 
and  I  told  the  elders  and  members  of  a  church  that  was 
gathered  there  on  a  form,  my  mind  of  their  standing,  and 
t*he  Lord  shook  many  of  them. 

From  earthly  oharins»  O  Jesus,  set  me  free, 
^  '  No  muster  let  me  serve  and  know  but  thee. 

I  fain  would  spend'  my  life,  and  in  thy  naire 
To  the  wide  world  thy  boundless  love  proclaim. 
Ja  :uARY  1st,  1782.  I  traveled  to  the  Falls  in  a  vefy 
heavy  snow  storm,  where  still'  I  fonnd  souls,  whose  dis- 
course was  chiefly  on  their  lost  state,^  and  the  name  of 
the  Lord  Jesus  Christ,  while  others  where  opposing  and 
despising  the  grace  of  God.  I  preached  twice  every  day, 
and  the  houses  were  crowded.  M^ny  were  very  much  a- 
wakened  ;  which  was  such  a  new  thing  (neither  known  nor 
heard  of  among' them)  that  many  did  not'  know  what  ailed  ' 
tiiem  ;  but  still  thirsted  to  hear  me  speak  in  the  name  of 
Christ.  Many  woultl  hover  around  me  after  sermon,  who 
seemed  as  if  they  longed  to  speak  to  me  and  unfold  their 
ease^  but  dared  not  to  open  their  mouths,  for  it  was  new  and 
strange  to  them  and  to  the  whole  town ;  for  there  never 
Rad  been  such  a  talk  as  a  guilty  conscience,  a  burthened 
mind,  a  hard  heart  or  a  stubborn  will,  or  about  any  convic- 
tions or  conversions  ;  nor  of  the  love  of  God,  or  declaring 
what  he  had  done  for  their  souls  ;  but  only  if  any  one  had 
(as  they  say)  a  desire  to  be  religious,  or  had  lost  some  re- 
lation by  death  (which  is  the  cause  of  great  numbers  join- 
ing the  churches)  they  go  to  the  minister,  and  he  advises 
them  to  join  the  church,  Sec.  I  remained  in  Livei*pooi  and 
preached  in  different  parts  by  night  and  day. 

6th.  Being  Sabbath  day  I  preached  two  sermons  in 
the  day  ;  and  at  nighf  I  was  asked  to  preach  down  to  the 
Point.  When  I  came  there  the  house  was  crowded  in  eve- 
ry part  to  a  great  diegree.  And  I  think  I  had  the  greatest 
fi-eedom  to  argue  with  them  and  to  entreat  them, that  lever 
had  in  the  place.  My  soul  was  full,  and  the  truths  of  G«d 
seemed  to  pour  into  my  mind  faster  than  I  could  deliver 
them.   I  had  every  thing  to  say  to  the  people,  that  1  desired: 


150 


REV.   HXKRY  ALLIKE'S 


li, ' 


.      'U. 


^fli' 


Ml 


to,  and  the  hearers  were  greatly  taken  hold  on,  and  it  seemed, 
they  could  not  go  away.     Some  followed  me  to  my  lodging 
and  staid  their  till  midnight.     I  took  my  leave  of  them, . 
for  I  intended  to  sail  away  the  next  day,  if  the  wind  proved 
fair,  if  not  I  promised  them  to  preach  again  ;  but  the  wind . 
being  fair,  I  left  the  place,  leaving  many  of  the  people  in 
tears,     O  that  God  may  bless  them  with  redemption  and ; 
bring  the  poor  mourning  souls  to  Chnst.    We  went  out  of 
the  harbour,  and  the  wind  being  fair,  we  came  in  three . 
hours  to  Sable  river,  where  I'  had  intended  to  stop. 

8th.  I  PREACHED  at  Sable  river,  discoursed  with  the 
people,  bid  them  farewell,  and  then  travelled  about  three 
miles  the  same  evening. 

9th.  I  ENJOYED  some  happy  moments  this  day  while 
travelling,  but  my  body  was  almost  worn  out  by  the  exces- 
aive  cold,  and  the  fatigues  of  travelling,  being  obliged  to  go 
round  the  upints  and  heads  of  all  the  bays. 

1 1th.  T  STOPPED  at  the  Ragged  Isl^d^,  and  staid  and 
preached  three  .or  four  days.  Here  I  found  some  engag- 
ed for  the  Kingdom,  and  I  was  happ^y  to  spend  all  the  time 
I  was  there,  labouring  with  them  ;  and  I  enjoyed  much  of 
the  presence  of  the  Lord  while  I  was  there,  O  I  can  say 
I  am  at  home  and  happy  and  alt  is  well,  wherever  I  be, 
when  I  enjoy  the  presence  of  God^  Never,  never  can  I 
express  the  happiness  that  I  have  enjoyed  even  under  the 
greatest  fatigues  of  body..  O  my  Jesus,  thou  art  all  in  all. 
14th.  I  WENT  in  an  open  boat  to  Port  Roseway,  where 
t  staid' and  preached  until  the  17t.h,  and  then  went  to  Port 
Latore;  I  stopped  there  and  preached  one  day.  But  O 
the  darkness  and  hardness  of  the  people,. 

19th.  I  TRAVELLRD  in  the  rain  to  Barrington,  and 
preached  there  and  discoursed  with  the  people  night  and, 
day.  There  was-a-^reat  moving  of  the  Spirit  among  them, . 
and  many  were  under  very  heavy  convictions  ;  but  they 
seem  to  hang  there,  and  I  cannot  say,  that  there  were  any 
more  than  one  that  was  delivered,  while  I  was  there.  Ma- 
ny seem  near  the  Kingdom,  and  are  continually  labouring 
in  deep  distress,  But  O  that  unbelief,  that  destroys  its 
thousands.  O  that  the  poor  distressed  souls  might  be  de-, 
Mvered !  It  is  a  trial  to  me  to  leave  them,  but  I  must. 

Have  pity  on  them»  O  thou  bleeding  Lamb  ; 

And  let  them  taste  the  sweetness  of  thy  name. 

Lord,  raise  the  dead  and  cause  the  blind  to  aec, . 

And  let  the  weary  souls  find  re«t  i^  thee. 


Lifts.  A3^D  JOUUKAL 


I5i- 


say 
be,. 

Hn  I 
the 
all. 

Here 
ort 

to 

I  and 
land, 
iemj . 
|hey 
ny 
[a- 
fing 
its 
de-, 


3l5t.  I  TR  WELDED  ill  Company  wltli  two  men  from 
die  head  of  that  cape  round  the  sea  shore  as  fur  as  Coch- 
wit.  I  think  it  was  the  coldest  day  that  ever  I  travelled  in, 
in  my  life.  I  was  much  fatigued,  but  dared  not  stop  to 
rest,  but  a  few  Minutes,  for  fear  of  freezing.  I  often  had 
scales  of  ice  on*  my  face  and  eyes,  for  the  snow  blowed  very 
tliick  all  the  day  ;  but,  blessed  be  God,  we  got  before  night 
to  a  little  house,  wiiere  I  found  the  people  vastly  kind  ;  and 
I  am  sure  no  earthly  palace  was  ever  more  agreeable  to  me, 
t|>an  that  was.  Neither  of  us  was  touched  with  the  frost, 
and  by  the  next  morning  I  was  able  to  walk  again.  The 
two  men  returned,  and  the  man  of  the  house  went  with  me. 
The  severity  of  the  weather  was  abated,  and  I  had  but  a- 
bout  ten  miles  to  walk  that  day  and  came  to  Pubnico,  where 
I  preached  the  same  evening,  The  people  seemed  to  have 
hearing  ears,  and  the  man  that  came  with  iiae  seemed  to 
be  awakened  and  sensible  of  his  darkness. 

February  2d.  1  preached  early  in  the  morning,  when, 
the  society  seemed  all  attention,  D^d  some  in  great  distress 
for  their  souls.  I  then  travelled  with  twelve  or  thirteen  in 
company  (who  followed  me  to  hear  the  gospel)  as  far  as 
Strawberry  Point,  where  the  people  were  soon  gathered; 
said  I  preached  there  in  the  evening,  and  there  were  soul* 
that  appeared  nigh  to  the  Kingdom,  and  almost  all  their 
discourse  after  sermon  was,  what  shall  we  do  to  be  saved  ? 

3d.  I  PREACHED  early  in  the  morning,  and  then  trav- 
elled with  men,  women  and  children  in  company  up  to  the 
head  of  the  bay  ;  where  I  had  the  happiness  to  find  some 
souls  born  to  Christ  since  I  was  there,^  who  were  now  ex- 
■-  horting  others  to  go  to  Christ. . 

7th.  I  TOOK  my  leave,  of  the  people,  out  many  left  me 
with  a  heavy  heart,  and  travelled  with  six  men  in  company 
to  Chebogue,  where  was  a  bitter  opposition  and  many  op- 
posers  ;  especially  the  minister,  whose  religion  would  very 
easily  suflRgr  hlm^to  get  in  a  passion,  and  call  me  an  impu- 
dent fellow  ;  which  caused  me  to  tell  him,  that  he  shewed 
what  kingdom  he  belonged  to  by  his  rage  and  malice.  I 
preached  in  Chebogue  and  Cape  Orsue  some  days,  and 
there  appeared  an  Wakening  among  mai)y,  and  some, 
that  had  stood  off  and  scoffed,  began  to  hear.  Some 
of  them  opent  ^  their  doors  for  me  to  preach  at  their  houses. 
But  there  were  still  a  number  of  scoffers,  especially  at  Cape 
Ors(ue.     The  Lord  forgive  them  and  open  their  eyes,  be- 


.  m 


m 


-  'i 


Hf 


152 


R£y,  HENRY  ALLlNlt'S 


n 


I  '^% 


i  1 1 


fore  the  day  is  over,  and  they  eternally  gone.  I  remained' 
preaching  every  day  and  discoursed  much  (for  I  had  many 
came  to  see  me)  until  the  19th,  when  I  bid  them  farewell, 
and  rode  as  fiir  as  some  of  the  ontskirts  of  the  settlement 
to  forward  me  on  my  way,  and  to  have  the  less  to  walk. 
There  came  many  t©  tlie  house  where  I  preached  in  the 
evening,  and  a  happy  evening  it  was  to  me.  I  had  great 
liberty  in  addressing  thg  people  in  the  name  of  Jesus. 

20th.  1'  SKT  out  to  go  ©n  foot  with  two  men  in  com- 
pany. Part  of  the  way  we  could  walk  pretty  free  of  the 
woods,  and  part  ef  the  way  we  v/ere  obliged  to  keep  the 
woods.  And,  blessed  l)e  God,  1  can.  say,  a  great  part  of 
the  walk  was.  happy  to  me..  I  once  asking  a  blessing  at  re- 
fi-eshing  ourselves  on  the  beaeh,  had  such  a  sense  of  the 
love  of  God,  that  my  heart  was  ready  to  burst ;  and  the 
men  that  were  with  me,  being  poor  dark  souls,  knew  no- 
thing of  my  joy  and  heavenly  food  ;  so  I  took  my  morsel 
in  my  hand,  and  walked  on  my  journey,  rejoicing,  leaving 
them  to  overtake  me.  G  what  a  peaceful  and  happy  walk 
1  had.  I  thought  the  very  rumbling  of  the  ocean,  an'^ ' 
ing  of  the  surf,  spoke  for  the  wisdom  of  God  anc  .  ,^  ..- 
ness  in  a  most  striking  language  ;  and  I  could  say  all  was 
well,  and  it  was  a  heaven  whenever  or  wherever  I  enjoyed 
my  God.  We  travelled  1 8  miles,  and  then  encamped  in 
nn  old  camp  in  the  woods.  The  next  morning  we  left  our 
camp  and  proceeded,  but  as  there  wasmuch  snow  fallen  that 
night, it  was  more  heavy  travelling  with  our  snow  shoes,  but 
nevertheless  we  got  to  Martagon^  a  French  settlement,  be- 
fore night.  The  next  meming  I  hired  a  French  lad  to  go 
with  me  and  carry  my  portmanteau  as  far  a»  Gi&iboo,.  I 
stopped  there  a  few  day^  v  ith  the  English  people,  and  saw 
some  souls  groaning  under  sin  and  confessing  they  knew 
nothing  of  the  new  birth,  but  their  cr\'  was  to  be  taught,  I 
left  them  with  a  heavy  heart.  However,  Christ  is  there, 
and  there  were  some  christians  there,  who  I  hope  will  be 
a  blessing  in  the  hands  of  God.  I  stopped  so  long  there, 
and  at  Annapolis  bason,  that  I  did  not  get  to  Annapolis  un- 
til the  first  of  March. 

March  1st.  When  I  came  there  I  heard  that  the 
work  was  still  continuing.  I  had  the  happiness  to  see  and 
discourse  with  a  young  woman,  who  was  ^* wakened  in  the 
first  of  the  reformation,  who  had  turned  away  and  joined  the 
appears,  but  was  now  returned  again^  and,  I  believe,  was 


LFFE  AND  JOv'RNAt. 


t5l 


'emainetV 
lad  many 
farewell, 
ettlement 

to  walk. 
;d  in  the 
rtad  great 
esus. 

n  in  com- 
ee  of  the 

keep  the 
at  part  of 
sing  at  re- 
tise  of  the 
; ;  and  the 

knew  no- 
i\y  morsel 
ng,  leaving 
lappy  walk 
n,  an'' ' 

;ay  aU  was 
'  I  enjoyed 
icamped  in 
we  left  our 

V  fallen  that 

V  shoes,  but 
kment,  be- 
:h  lad  to  go 
Gisiboo..  I 
)le,  and  saw 

they  knew 
;  taught.  1 
St  is  there, 
lope  will  be 

long  there, 
inapolis  un- 

rd  that  the 
IS  to  see  and 
cened  in  the 
d  joined  the 
believe,  was 


ar  new  bom  soul.  O  how  affecting  was  the  language  of 
her  humble  soul.  I  rem.uned  in  Annapolis  county  about? 
seven  days  and  found  the  work  of  God  continuing  under 
the  labour  of  brother  Chipman.  I  was  likewise  informed  by 
a  letter  from  Cumberland,  Uut  the  Redeemer's  kingdom 
was  flourishing  there. 

8th,  1  WENT  tO'Cbrnwallis,  staid  there  but  a  few  days, 
and  then  went  to  Horton,  Falmouth  and  Windsor.  Mv 
friends  received  irie  as  almost  one  from  the  dead  :  for  the 
report  that  I  died  on  Oape  Sable  shore  was  so.believed,  that 
two  of  my  christian  brothers  went  through  to  see  how  it 
was,  and  to  get  my  writings..  I  enjoyed  happiness  with 
my  friends,  and  happy  days  until  the  first  of  April. 

April  1st.  I  Set  out  again  for  Annapolis,  as  the 
churches  liad  agreed  that  I  should"  go  with  delegates  from 
the  other  churches  to  separate  brother  Chipman  to  the 
work  v/hereunto  God  had  called  him.  I  stopped  and  preach* 
ed  at  Horton  and  Cornwallis,  and  then  we  rode  to  Annapo- 
lis, stopped  and  preached  to  the  scattered  on  the  road.  And 
a  happy  ride  we  had. 

24th.  Whe^  the  churches  were  met,  and  many  peo- 
ple, it  seemed  almost  like  the  day  of  Pentecost.  Some  of 
the  christians  were  so  carried  away,  that  they  were  almost 
past  speaking. 

25th.  The  churches  met  again,  and  a  vast  concourse  o£ 
people.  Brother  Pezant  preached  at  7  in  the  morning, 
and  then  a  stage  was  built  in  a  field,  where  the  delegates, 
the  candidate  and  myself  stood.  I  preached  a  sermon, 
and  then  dehvered  the  charge.  It  was  a  joyful  day  to  the 
christians.  Then  we  rose  up,  not  to  authorise  (as  manjr 
pretend)  but  to  bear  witness  and  bid  God  speed  to  one  that 
(iod  had  authorised  and  sent  forth.  There  was  exhorting 
of  sinners  and  praising  of  God  all  night. 

26th.  1  PREACHED  again,  and  then  made  what  speed  I 
coikld  to  Windsor,  expecting  an  opportunity  from  thence  to. 
St.  John's  river,  and  about  the  2'9th  1  left  Windsor  for  St. 
John's  river.  Being  calm  much  of  the  time,  it  was  four 
days  before  we  got  to  the  river ;  but  blessed  be  God,  I  had 
many  happy  hours  on  board,  and  got  all  the  people  to  at- 
txjnd  at  prayers,  although  I  do  not  believe  there  was  a 
christian  among  them.  But  I  can  say,  that  when  I  found- 
no  one  that  cQVild  talk  the  language  of  Sion,  Jesus  was  my 
jojr,  strength  and  qorapanion.    O  m>;  5QuI,  what  need  J. 


•'  ^' 


'V* 


■  •!'.■■: 


1 1 


1. 


,1 


■K  ' 


U' 


I 


154 


KKV*  BENRT  ALLINE's 


When  I  came  to  tlie  river,  the  vessel  did  not  go  np^ 
that  I  was  in  ;  but  God  gave  me  speed,  for  there  was  an- 
other vessel  just  going  over  the  falls  to  go  up  the  river,  so 
that  without  the  least  delay,  I  crossed  Pot-Ash,  and  went 
immediately  on  board,  and  had  the  happiness  to  find  the 
man  that  was  both  master  and  owner,  to  be  a  christian,  so 
that  I  had  one  to  discourse  with  on  the  things  of  the  king- 
dom.    O  the  happy  hours  I  enjoyed  in  my  soul  at  times,, 
blessed  be  God,  I   felt  myself  at  home  by  sea  or  by  land>. 
*ui  a  wilderness,  or  any  where,  when  I  give  my  heart  to 
him. 

O  may  I  speak  the  goodness  of  my  God, 
And  live  to  spread  Iiis  gracious  fame  abroad. 
Let  me  with  joy  wear  out  my  mortal  days, 
,  In  tourt'ing  sovils  to  celebrate  his  praise. 

I  REMAINED  on  the   river,  preaching  from    place   to 
place  among  the  peopte  almost  every  day,  and  often  twice 
a  day  until   the  26th   of  May,  during  which  time  I  had 
happy  days  and  much  of  the  spirit  of  God  moving  upon 
among  the  people.     Many  of  his  children,  who  had  been 
long  in  darkness  were  delivered,  and   some  sinners  were 
brought  to  God,  and  constrained  to  rejoice  publicly  in  the 
love  of  Jesus.     O  the  sweetness  of  that  love  ;  the  great- 
ness of  that  joy ;  which  the   soul  finds  in  Ghrist,  when 
brought  from  the  borders  of  eternal  despair.     As  for  my- 
self, I  went  through  many  trying  hours  in  my  mind,  but, 
blessed  be   God,.  I  was  delivered  out  of  them  all ;  and  I 
find  that  my  own  unbelief  is   the  cause  of  all  my  trials  ; 
which  some  will  think  strange  to  hear  come  from  a  man, 
who  declares  he  knows  the  time  and  place  of  his  conver-^ 
sion,  and  had  enjoyed   so  many  evidences  of  God's  love 
or  Christ's  love  since  his  conversion.     But  let  it  be  observe 
cd,  that  when  1  speak  o£  faith,  I  am  still  as  wide  from  the 
opinion  of  the  greatest  part  of  the  professors  of  Christianity, 
as  the  east  is  from  the  west.     For  in  the  first  place  some 
have  no  other  faith  than  what  they  have  from  history  and 
tradition.     They  have  so  often  read,  and  been  taught,  that 
a  certain  man  named  Jesus  Christ,  who  professed  to  be  the 
Son  of  God,  was  on  earth  about  seventeen  hundred  year* 
ago,  who  suffered  and  died  for  all  that  would  believe   in^ 
hiir.;  that  they  receive  this  as  a  true  saving  belief, and  when 
they  have  practised  sdHfie  duties  on  externals  (whith  they 
imagine  he  has  left  for  their  rule  tp  heaven)  and  haye  m* 


/  •* 


t  go  tips 
ivas  ati' 
river,  so 
lid  went 
find  the 
jtian,  so 
le  king- 
Lt  times,, 
oy  land,, 
heart  to 


N 


LIFE  XKD  lOURNAL* 


15$ 


place   to 

en  twice 

le  I  had 

ng  upon 

lad  becn- 

ers  were 

ly  in  the 

e  great- 

rt,  when 

for  my- 

nd,  but, 

;  and  I 

trials  ; 

a  man, 

conver* 

)d*3  love 

observ* 

from  the 

istianity, 

ce  some 

ory  and 

rht,  that 

o  be  the 

ed  years 

lieve   in= 

nd  when 

kh  they 

haresMB^ 


^ucd  themselves  into  a  belief,  that  that  man  satisfied  some- 
thing in  God  (which  they  call  his  incensed  justice)  and  ful- 
filled some  outward  law  that  was  against  them,  then  they 
imagine  that  all  is  well,  and  say,  they  have  faith  in  Christ ; 
when  at  the  same  time  they  know  no  more  of  the  new 
birth,  and  that  true  faith,  which  is  of  the  operation  of  the 
spirit  of  God,  than  Simon  the  Sorcerer :  and  living  and  dy- 
ing with  no  better  faith  than  that,  they  will  as  finally  be  lost 
as  God's  word  is  true.  O  that  such  people  would  have 
pity  on  themselves";  and  while  they  are  here  acting  for  a 
vast  eternity,  examine  well  what  they  are  doing,  and  what 
they  are  building  their  hopes  upon  before  their  dye  is  cast 
and  their  loss  irreparable. 

Unhappy  soul,  that  doth  with  full  sail  go  on, 
Feariess  till  sunk,  and  his  all  forever  gone. 

But  the  faith,  yea,  and  the  only  faith,  which  I  would 
attest  to  as  beneficial  to  the  fallen  race^  is  that  which  God 
declares  to  be  the  substance  of  things  hoped  for.  It  may 
be  observed,  that  he  doth  not  say,  the  shadow  or  represen- 
tation of  things  hoped  for,  but  the  substance.  And  when 
Christ  speaks  of  true  faith,  he  declares  that  if  a  man  had  a 
spark  as  a  grain  of  mustard-seed,  it  would  remove  the 
mountains  and  raise  the  dead  (or  things  of  the  same  na- 
ture.) So  that  is  an  infallible  truth,  that  whosoever  has  but 
one  spark  of  that  true  faith  in  exercise,  he  would  feel  the  ef- 
fects of  it,  in  the  removing  of  sin  ;  the  mountains  ot  sin, 
which  he  laboured  under ;  and  in  the  raising  of  his  dead 
mind  from  the  state '  of  death,  to  a  real  knowledge  and  ac- 
tivity in  a  divine  hfe.  Therefore,  let  others  believe  and  say 
what  they  will  of  their  faith  in  Christ,  and  expectation  of 
heaven,  without  this  felt  knowledge  to  the  soul,  1  utterly 
renounce  any  pretended  faith,  hope  or  confidence  for  the 
redemption  of,  or  any  benefit  to  the  soul,  but  that. which  it 
by  the  operation  ot  the  Spirit  of  God  ;  which  removes  my 
disorders,  scatters  my  darkness  and  manifests  Jesus  Christ 
to  my  soul  at  the  very  time,  which  gives  me  a  degree  of 
the  real  enjoyments  of  heaven  ;  for  Chnst  is  God,  Christ  is 
life.  He  is  salvation,  rest,  peace  and  everlasting  joy  to  all 
his  saints  :  and  whenever  that  word  of  fal-h  is  in,  it  gives 
me  liberty,  and  causes  me  to  rejoice,  bows  my  will,  hum- 
bles my  heart  and  bears  me  away  above  created  good,  to 
enjoy  and  converse  with  spiritual  and  eternal  things,  yea, 
to  converse  with  God  within  the  vail.     And  it  ought  to  Ixr 


.t 


h!> 


f'  ' 


,  ;  m  '■  ii 


t56 


REV.  KKNRY  ALLINE's 


•observed  1jy  all  that  profess  faith  in  Christ,  that  in  alinosfe 
all  the  miracles  he  wrought,  he  told  them  beforehand, 
how  far  he  could  help  them  ;  for  he  would  say  ;  be  it  unto 
thee  according  to  thy  faith  ;  or  even  as  thou  wilt.  As  if 
he  had  said,  so  far  as  you  believe,  so  far  I  can  help  you  i 
and  therefore  be  it  unto  thee  according  to  thy  faith.  It 
ought  also  to  be  observed,  that  the  effect  of  that  fuilh  was 
immediate  ;  the  miracle  was  wrought  and  f;:lt  at  the  very 
instant  that  the  faith  was  acted.  They  did  not  say,  <i3  thou- 
sands of  poor  dark  souls  now  do  under  the  gospel,  1  have 
faith  in  Christ ;  but  it  has  not  pleased  God  to  give  ir.e  an 
answer  yet  ;  but,  say  they,  I  'have  faith  that  he  will  answer 
me  some  time  or  other  :  not  considering,  that  iheir  faith,  if 
true,  would  bring  an  answer :  for  it  is  by  faith  that  the  whole 
is  wrought  and  therefore  I  must  conclude  and  declare,  that 
when  there  is  nothing  .ftU  nor  clone,  there  is  no  true  fuilh. 
I  preached  this  day  to  a  large  number  of  people  in  the 
field  ;  and  it  beirg  the  last  Sabbath  I  expected  to  preach 
to  tliem  at  this  visit,  I  had  so  much  to  say  to  them,  and 
^hey  seemed  so  loth  to  part,  that  I  was  a'most  spent  before 
we  parted ;  and  then  1  went  ten  miles  down  the  river. 
But  after  I  had  refreshed  the  body,  I  preached  again  in  the 
evening  ;  and  it  was  an  evening  much  to  be  remeTnbtred. 
I  preached  al)out  Elijah's  translation,  and  I  had  such  a 
sense  of  lii* flight,  that  I  thought  I  was  so  bore  away  in  the 
same  flight,  that  1  tliought  1  should  almost  leu^e  the  body. 
O  the  sweet  and  ti'ansporting  attraction  that  my  soul  felt, 
\«rhich  carried  away  the  old  prophet  that,  stole  in  upon  my 
heart  with  unspeakable  joy  and  delight.  And  methinks  in 
a  degree  I  know  and  luive  experienced  the  nature  ixud  man- 
ner of  his  translatioru  Yea,  never  was  my  soul  before  so 
bore  away  t©  the  realms  of  eternal  feliciiy.  I  then  went 
down  the  river,  but  stopped  and  preaclied  in  diflercnt  pla- 
ces as  I  went  down,  then  we  came  to  the  mouth  df  the 
river. 

29th.  I  CANNOT  but  remark  the  goodness  of  God  in 
ibrwarding  me  in  the  way.  When  I  came  to  the  fort  at 
the  mouth  of  the  river,  there  appeared  no  passage  fioiu 
thence  ;  and  I  thought  I  could  not  content  myself  long  in 
that  dark  place  :  but  tlie  very  next  day  four  or  five  vesiseis 
came  in,  all  bound  for  Cumberland,  where  I  w  antt  !  to  go. 

JvnK  Sd.  We  sailed  for  Cumberland,  and  we  were 


LIFE  AND  JDURNAU 


15^ 


I  alinoafe 
trehand, 
t  it  unto 
.     As  if 
]p  you  ) 
lith.      It 
uith  was 
the  very 
as  thou- 

1  have 
i  n^.e  an 
1  answer 
'  faith,  if 
;ie  whole 
lure,  that 
ue  fuilh. 
I  in  the 
>  preach 
em,  and 
nt  before 
he  river, 
in  in  the 
jTi^btred. 
,d  such  a 
ay  in  the 
he  body, 
ioiil  felt, 
Lipon  my 

hinks  in 
ind  man- 
)efore  so 
en  went 

cnt  pla- 
of  the 

God  in 

fort  at 
e  from 
long  in 
i  vesseis 
to  go. 
e  were 


!?^mctime  t^olng  for  want  of  wind,  but  had  no  distressing 
time  at  all. 

1.  O  thou  my  God,  at  whose  command 
The  bellowing  oceans  rise  ; 

And  at  the  moving  of  thine  hand,    "  ^  ^ 

Again  the  tempest  dies. 

2.  O  ht  tliine  arm  of  pow'p  and  love 

'  My  constant  helper  stand  ;  ,  ' 

^    .      While  o'er  the  wat'ry  grave  I  rove 
Or  tread  the  desert  land. 

3.  Or  if  the  gapings  of  the  flood  *" 
Should  be  my  wat'ry  tomb  ; 

May  1  awake  with  thee,  my  God, 
And  find  my  peaceful  home. 

4.  There,  where  the  storms  no  more  shall  beaty 
Or  bellowing  oceans  roar,  ^  ; 

O  let  me  have  my  happy  seat. 
Thy   goodness  to  «dore. 

6th.  We  came  to  Cumberland,  where  I  found  somfe 
•christians  alive  to  God  ;  but  some  had  got  into  darkness  by 
disputing  about  principles.     I  preached  every  day  and  en* 
joyed  much  liberty  ;  and  the  Lord  blessed  my  labours  both 
^o  christians  and  sinners.     After  I  had  been  in  Cumberland 
about  a  fortnight,   I  went  to  Shepody  and  Petitcodiac.     I 
preached  often  there,  and  conversed  much  with  the  people-, 
and  they  seemed  to  have  an  hearing  ear,  but  no  one  at  that 
time  got  any  deliverance,  but  the  christians  were  something 
enlivened.  When  I  had  been  up  the  river,  and  had  preached 
in  almost  every  village,  I   returned  down  the  river  with 
twelve  men  in  company.     We  came  to  a  village  of  Dutch 
people  about  twelve  at  night,  where  I  intended  to  stop  and 
preach.     The  next  day  1  preached   two  sermons  and  the 
people  gave  attention,  but  -were  so  chained  down  to   the 
form  of  religion  or  godliness  without  the  power,  and  wer» 
so  strict  in  their  forms,  that  it  was  almost  impossible   to 
convince  them  that  they  were  no  christians  ;  or  that  they 
needed  any  thing  else*     But  there  was  a  young  fnan  a- 
mong  them,  who  was  brought  lo  the  knowledge  of  Christ, 
and  enjoyed  great  liberty  in  hrs  mind,  who  laboured  very 
much  with  this  people,  but  they  looked  on  him  as  one  un- 
vder  a  delusion .  because  he  told  them,  that  their  being  baptiz- 
ed and  goin^  to  the  Lord's  supper,  with  all  the  other  forms 
they  practised,  would  not  save  them,  and  that  they  would 
ibe  as  certainly  lost  as  if  they  had  never  practised   any  of 
5them  ;  telling  them,  that  they  must  know  what  it  was  to 

O 


1^ 


.   K 


151. 


REV.  HEMRT  ALLXNE's 


be  born  again  and  feel  it  in  their  own  souls,  exclusive  of  aM 
their  externals.  O  the  blindness  of  the  poor  wretched  race 
of  Adam,  while  in  an  unrepjenerate  state. 

Have  pitv  on  them,  O  my  God, 

Convert  them  by  lliy  blessed  word  : 

O  may  they  live  to  know  thy  grace, 

And  join  thy  glorious  name  to  praise. 
1  RETURNED  again  to  Sackfield,  in  Cumberland,    and 
preached  there,  and  the  spirit  of  God  was  among  the  people 
with  power. 

23d.  1  PREACHED  atGreenliill  to  a  great  numberof  peo- 
ple, and  in  the  afternoon  1  preached  in  a  field  near  the  fort 
in  hopes  that  it  might  draw  some  of  the  soldiers,  and  there 
were  many  that  attended  and  some  seemed  to  give  great 
attention,  but  before  sennon  was  over  the  officers  com- 
manded them  into  tiie  fort  ;  and  thus  it  is  with  many,  thty 
will  not  enter  the  kingdom  themselves,  nor  sufler  those 
that  are  entering  in,  to  enter. 

26th.  In  answer  to  a  request  sent  me,  I  met  a  ntmibcr 
ofbigotted  presbytcrians  and  mountain  mm  to  reason  on 
points  of  doctrine  and  principles  we  differed  in  :  a  vast  con- 
course of  peoi>le  attended  to  hear.     The  presbytcrians  and 
mountain  men  chose  three  men  to  speak  ;  which  I  consent- 
ed to  on  this  condition  that  they -should  speak  but  one  at  a 
time  :  we  discoursed  on  some  points,  which  I  w  as  desirous 
to  do   for  the  sifke  of  opening  the  eyes  of  many  of  the 
spectators  ;  but  when  they  found  themselves  confuted,  they 
would  not  acknowledge  it,  but  gii^w   warm,  and  not  only 
two  or  three  of  their  speakers  spoke  at  once,  but  also  some 
of  their  society,  and  they  began  to  cast  reproaches  and  r«- 
flections ;  1  told  tliem,  they  had  not  only  not  kept  their  word, 
but  also  discovered  by  their  spirit  what  kingdom  they  be^ 
longed  to.    Their  passion  grew  so  high,  that  they  broke 
through  the  croud  one  at  a  time  and  went  away.     After 
which  I  preached  a  sermon  to  the  auditory  ;  who  by   the 
discourse  and  the  spirit  these  people  discovered,  were  many 
of  them  convinced  that  the  people  called  n^w^  llg.hts  were 
rii>jit,  and  that  they  discovered  most  of  the  spirit  of  the  gos- 
pel.    Indeed  I  believe,   if  there  were  none  that  disputed  a- 
bout  the  name  and  the  doctrine  of  Christ,  but  tliosc   that 
had  the  spirit  of  Christ,  we  should  not  hear  one  dispute, 
where  now  we  hear    ten.     I   remained  in   Cumberland, 
preaching  to  and  visifing  the  people  until 

July  6th.  Aj?d  was  often   obliged  to  preach  in  tl>.e 
^Ws  on  account  of  the  ^reat  concourse  ol  the  people  :  W^jJ 


LtrZ  AVD  JOURWA'ti 


159 


many  happy  hours  I  enjoyed  in  proclaiming  the  name  of 
Jcsas.  O  the  life  and  sweetness  of  that  j«;ospel,  when  the 
soul  is  m.ide  a  partaker  of  it,  and  feels  it  to  be  the  wisdom 
and  power  of  God.  I  often  tiiink  what  a  hard  task  it  must 
be  to  the  poor  readers  and  iiirelings,  who  know  nothing  ok* 
this  spirit  and  love  to  reward  and  cheer  them  in  their  ia-^ 
hours  ;  and  let  them  pretend  to  have  ever  so  much  religion 
and  love  for  God  and  for  souls  ;  their  love  and  likewise  their 
reward  is  in  their  salary,  and  wordly  prospects  :  nor  can 
an  unconverted  preacher  be  excited  by  any  higher  motive. 
7ch.  I  uoDE  with  a  number  of  friends  to  the  Bay  Vest, 
intending  to  go  from  thence  to  the  island  of  St.  John's,  I 
preached  there  the  same  day,  and  my  company  returned  to 
Cumberland.  It  seemed  something  hard  parting,  but  wc 
had  tliis  to  comfort  us,  that  we  should  meet  again  where 
parting  hours  will  for  ever  cease. 

9th.  I  WKM  r  on  board  a  schooner  for  the  island  of  S*. 
John's,  and  we  had  a  quick  i)assage.  1  found  there  very  dark 
people,  and  indeed,  most  of  them  openly  profane.  I  preach- 
ed four  or  five  times  in  the  principal  towns,  where  some 
seemed  to  begin  to  be  fond  of  hwaring  these  strange  things, 
and  others  opposed  and  blasphemed.  One  evening,  when 
at  prayer  among  a  number  of  people,!  heard  a  cursing  and 
blaspheming  in  the  room,  when  I  expected  soon  to  be 
struck  by  them,  but  God  gave  me  strength  to  continue 
praying  without  even  looking  to  see  who  or  what  it  was  ; 
but  I  heard  them  go  out.  After  meeting  I  asked  the  peo- 
ple who  the  disturbers  were  ;  they  told  me  it  was  an  oflker 
who  came  in  and  drove  out  some  soldiers  which  were  there; 
who  began  to  be  something  thoughtful,  and  as  he  drove 
them  out,  he  damn'd  thtm,  and  swore  by  God,  that  that 
fellow  (meaning  me)  would  lead  them  all  to  hell  and  dam- 
nation. After  I  had  pi^eached  in  the  town  a  few  days,  I 
went  back  into  the  country,  and  at  a  place  called  St.  Peter's, 
I  found  two  christians,  and  I  had  found  one  in  the  town. 
These  three  were  the  only  ones  I  found  on  the  island.  At 
this  place  the  people  had  some  light,  and  gave  great  atten- 
tion to  the  gospel,  and  the  Spiritof  God  awakened  some  poor 
sinners  to  a  sense  of  their  danger,  and  to  begin  to  inquire 
after  Christ.  I  trust  the  gospel  was  not  sent  there  in  vain. 
O  that  those  awakened  souls  might  not  rest  until  they  found 
Jesus  Christ  their  resting  place.  I  returned  again  to  the 
town,  and  there  I  preached  again  four  or  five  times  ;  and 
that  one  christian,  whom  I  spcke  of  b<;fore>  was  much  re« 


M  1 


fu  T 


Hi 


Id9' 


I      : 


REV.  HINRY  ALLINf/s 


ill 


f           1 

'An 

V 

vived,  and  rejoiced  greatly,  that  ever  the  gospa]  was  sciU 
upon  that  dark,  iblaiid. 

23d.  About  eight  in  the  morning,  I  left  the 
island  in  a.  large  two-mast  boat,  which  1  had  hired  to  carry 
me  to  the  main.  We  sailed  all  day  and  most  of  the  night,and 
got  to  land  a  little  before  break  of  day,  and  in  a  few  hours, 
we  got  to  a  place  called  Picto,  where  1  had  no  thoughts  of 
making  any  stay,  but  finding  tlie  Spirit  of  God  to  attend  my 
preaching,  I  stayed  tl.ere  thirteen  days,  and  preached  in  all 
the  different  parts  of  the  settlement.  1  found  four  christians 
in  this  place,  who  were  greatly  revived,  and  rejoiced  that  the 
gospel  was  sent  among  them^  A  great  number  of  poor 
sinners  were  so  awakened,  that  they  crowded  night  and  day 
to  hear  the  gospel.  Indeed  it  was  hard  leaving  them,  when 
fio  distressed  and  desirous  to  hear  ;  but  such  were  my  press- 
ing obligations  to  other  places,  that  I  dare  stay  no  longer. 

August  5th.  in  the  morning  I  took  my  leave  of  the 
people,  and  set  out  with  a  young  man,  who  had  been  with 
me  about  two  months,  to  go  through  the  woods  to  Cobc- 
quid  ;  but  not  being  able  to  get  through,  we  were  obhged 
to  lodge  in  the  woods  on  the  ground,  with  no  other  shelter 
but  the  trees,  and  the.,  ethereal  cuuopy  ^  but  God  was  with. 
U5>  and  all  was  welL 

O  the  great  goodness  of  the  Lord  to  me  ! 

His  hand  supports  me  o'er  the  boist'rous  sea  : 
*■  ',      Or  ifi'm  c.ill'd  to  cross  t]»c  desert  lund, 

lin  still  protected  t}  his  present  hand. 
~       ■  O  Jcsiis,  melt  my  lieart  witii  love  divine, 

And  lot  my  days,  my  life  and  soul  be  thine. 
6th.  In  the  morning  about  eight  of  the  clock  we  tame 
in  to  the  settlements,  and  travelled  down  through  the  coun- 
try.    There  were  two  poor  dark  ministers  there,  who  in- 
formed the  people,  that  there  was  a  strange  impostor  from 
the  countries  up  the  bay,  who  they  heard  was  coming  a- 
mong  them  ;  who  was  neither  college  learned,  nor  authoriz- 
ed by  the  presbytery.  He  was  anpw  light,  he  ^\as  a  separ- 
atist, and  one  that  broke  up  their  churches.    The  poor  dark 
people  (most  of  them)  conceived  such  an  opinion  of  me, 
that  they  would   gaze  at  me,  as  I  passed  their  doors,  with 
as  much  strangeness,  as  if  I  was  one  the  antediluvians  ; 
and  when  1  came  down  to  the  public  house  I  was  even  re- 
fused a  bed  or  a  room  for  any  money.     I  sent   then  the 
young  man  that  was  with  me,  to  another  public  house,  and 
when  they  heard  my  name,  they  likewise  refused  to  tak«- 
me  in.    The  young  man  returned,  and  found  me  walking 


was  sent 

left  the 
d  to  carry 
night,  and 
ew  hours, 
oughts  of 
attend  my 
:hed  in  all 
christians 
;d  that  the 
r  of  pooF 
lit  and  day 
lem,  when 
my  press- 
longer, 
ve  of  the 
been  with 

to  Cobc- 
t  obhged 
ler  shelter 
i  was  witk 


LIFS  AND  JOURNAL. 


t6r 


we  came 
he  coun- 
who  in- 

stor  from 

oming  a- 

authoriz- 
a  separ- 

:)oor  dark 
of  me, 

orsj  with 
luvians  ; 
even  re- 
hen  the 

)use,  and 
to  take- 
walking 


\ 


in  the  street,  and  told  me,  that  he  believed  I  must  lie  in  the 
street  all  night ;  I  replied  I  could  do  it  without  reluctance  for 
the  name  of  Christ.  At  length  there  was  a  poor  old  man, 
who  said  he  would  willingly  receive  me,  if  he  had  a  bed  fit 
for  me  to  sleep^  in,  but  did  not  like  to  receive  me,  because 
he  was  so  poor,  but  he  directed  the  young  man  where  to 
find  a  house,  he  believed  i  might  get  entertainment  in  ; 
but  when  he  went  there,  the  man  at  first  refused,  saying  he 
had  heard  of  me,  and  did  not  like  to  receive  me,  or  any  sucli 
man  as  I  was,  into  his  house :  yet  after  some  discourse 
(when  the  young  man  told  him  that  it  was  hard,  that  a  man 
could  not  get  a  lodging  for  any  money,  where  they  called 
themselves  christians)  the  man  said  he  would  let  me  have 
a  room  and  a  bed,  and  sent  for  me  to  come.  When  I  came 
there,  he  led  me  through  the  house  to  my  room,  and  the 
people  looked  on  me  as  if  I  had  some  distemper,  that  was 
catching.  However  they  soon  began  to  shew  more  free- 
dom, and  some  of  them  hearing  me  sing,  knocked  at  the 
door,  and  asked  me  if  they  might  come  in  and  hear  mc 
sing;  I  replied  yes,  if  they  thought  it  was  safe  for  them. 
For  their  conceptions  had  been,  that  there  was  danger  of 
being  caught  with  that  spiritj  that  I  went  about  with.  But 
the  people  began  to  be  free,  and  the  man  of  the  house  called 
me  out,  and  desired  me  to  pmy  in  his  family,  and  numbers^ 
of  people  came  in^  However  my  design  was  to  deliver  my 
message  as  far  as  I  was  able,  if  it  was  in  the  street  (if  there 
was  no  door  opened)  before  1 1  t  the  place.  But  the  third 
day  I  was  there  I  was  desired  by  a  poor  man  to  preach  at 
his  house.  I  appointed  to  preach  there  at  four  o'clock  in 
the  afternoon.  The  minister  of  that  part  of  the  country, 
hearing  thereof,  wrote  me  a  note,  demanding  to  meet  hint 
and  his  elders  at  such  a  tavern  at  four  o'clock,  to  give  them 
a!i  account,  what  right  I  had  to  appear  in  the  capacity  of  a 
preacher  of  the  gospel.  I  wrote  him  an  answer,  informing 
him,  that  although  I  should  be  glad  to  meet  him  and  his 
elders,  yet  was  suiprised,  that  he  should  make  such  a  de- 
mand ;  as  for  the  hour  he  had  appointed,  1  could  not  meet 
him  at  that  time,  for  I  had  promised  to  appear  there  in  pub-  - 
lie.  At  four  1  preached  and  a  great  number  of  people  at- 
tended, so  that  the  house  could  not  contain  them.  After  I 
had  preached  I  received  a  second  note  from  the  minister, 
desiring  me  to  meet  him  that  evening.  I  returned  him  for 
^  answer,  that  I  was  then  in  company,  neither  was  it  thtn^ 

02 


*'. 


i42 


REV.  HENRT  ALLINL  S 


a- proper  time ;  but  if  he  would  be  at  the  place,  he  had  appoint- 
ed, the  next  morning  at  nine  o'clock,  that  I  would  meet  him 
then  there.     T  met  them  accordingly,  and  a  number  of  the 
people.     I  told  them  I  was  then  ready  to  answer  any  ques- 
tions they  should,  ask  me,  either  the   minister,  elders  or 
deacons  ;  and  that  I  should  expect  to  have  the  same  liberty 
allowed  me,  to  ask  them  some  questions  :  for  since  I  was 
sent  for  and  knew  the  strange  conceptions  many  had,  and 
how  many  were  kept  in  darkness,  I  was  determined,  if  God. 
gave  me  strength,  to  discover  where  the  darkness  was,  and 
if  it  was  in  me.     We  then  began,  and  continued  for  about 
three  hours  *,  on  the  call  aud  qualifications    of  a  minister  ; 
the  door  into  the  ministry  ;.  the  power  of  ordination  •:  and 
original  sin.     At  which  some  of  them  got  so  fettered  with 
their  own  darkness,  that  they  left  the  room.     The  minister 
likewise  got  up  and  broke  off  from  tha  discourse.     But  the 
eyes  of  the  people  began  to  be  opened,  for  after  it  was  donq, 
the  man  with  whom  I  boarded,  being  present,  declared  they 
were  satisfied, and  that  now  they  saw  and  were  astonished  at 
what  prejudice  and  false  reports  had  done-    And  from  that 
hour  I  had  more  houses  open  to  me  than  I  could  supply. 
Thus  the  enemies  of  Christ,  by  theii'  endeavouring  to  shut 
the  door  against  the  gospel,  were  the  means  of  opening  it. 
I  PREACHED  three  or  four  days  in  Truro,  and  then 
crossed  the  river  to  Onslow  where  I  preached.     1  not  only 
preached  often,  but  discoursed  also  with  the  people,  whO' 
often  filled  my  room,  and  staid  until  twelve  at  night,  impa- 
tient to  hear  the  name  of  Jesus,  and  what  they  mu  st  do  to 
be  saved.     One  man,  who  was  before  a  member  of  one  of 
those  churches,  was  convinced  and  converted :  but  there 
■were  yet  many  of  the  pharisees  opposing  the  work,  and  la- 
Jt)ouring  to  turn  away  the  people  from  the  faitli. 

20th,  I  SET  out  with  some  company  to  leave  that  part 
and  proceed  down  the  bay,  but  was  obstructed  by  a  sudden 
turn  of  illness,  which  seized  me  in  a  moment,  and  they  laid 
me  on  a  bed,  so  I  was  detained  that  week  by  my  illness. 
But,  blessed  be  God,  I  recovered  strength,  so  that  I  was  a- 
ble  to  preach  on  Satuwlay  and  likewise  on  the  Sabbath  day  ; 
when  the  house  was  filled  with  people  from  eleven  in  the 
moring  until  twelve  at  night,  and  there  were  but  a  few  that 
were  not  under  some  movings  of  the  Spirit.  O  the  infinite 
goodness  of  my  God  and  master  to  the  sons  of  men,  and  t© 
nie  his  poor  unworthy  servant.  He  is  my  Uiider  and  my 
itrength  j  my  joy  and  my  resting  pl^e. 


L7F£  AJCD  JOfRNAL. 


163 


i  appoint* 
neet  him 
er  of  the 
Jiy  ques- 
ilders  or 
le  hberty 
ce  I  was 
had,  and 
Id,  if  God. 
was,  and 
or  about 
ninister ; 
ion  .;  and 
red  with 
minister 
But  the 
^^as  dono, 
ired  they 
nished  at 
from  that 
i  supply. 
^  to  shut 
ning  it. 
and  then 
not  only 
•pie,  whO' 
It,  impa- 
1  St  do  to 
fone  of 
It  there 
and  la- 
hat  part 
sudden 
hey  laid: 
illness, 
was  a- 
ith  day  ; 
in  the 
ew  that 
infinite 
,  and  t0 
nd  mjfi 


Where'er  I  rovA,  while  here  below ,  * 

My  Christ  is  all  the  joy  1  know. 
Mvj  leads  me,  when  thru' glooms  I  tread, 
And  whea  discourug'd  lifts  my  head. 
O  let  me  stilV  his  love  proclaim, 
While  I  with  mortals  bear  a  name. 
27th.  I  RODE  with  sjvoji  or  eight  in  company  td  a* 
9-m.dl  village  where  I  preached.     Alter  which  the  minister 
of  Londonderry  (wlio  had  rod^   twenty  miles,   to  get  the 
diors  shut  against  ni^i,  but  cam;i  too  late)  began  immediate- 
ly, being  in  a  great  rwige,  to  rail  at  me  ;  which  caused  all 
tiie  people,  bcia^  surprised,  to  stop,  and  not  leave  their 
places.     I  told  him  h;;  was  like  the  man,  who  was  among 
tiie  tom^is,  cutting  hinvself  ;  for  that  spirit  he  was  of  would 
torment  him ;  and  that  1  shoLild  not  enter  iiito  one  argu- 
ment with  him,  until  that  spirit  was  chained  or  cast  out.    I 
likewise  told  him,  that  his  own  spirit  and  conduct  discover- 
ed what  kingdom  he  was  of  and  belonged  to,     I  then  said 
no- more,  the  p;iople  likewise  were  all  silent,  but  the  minib- 
ter  continued  his  rage  and  throwing   reflections,  until  he 
found  that  I  would  not  answer  him,  and  then  he  sat   still, 
and  endeavoured  to  lay  a  restraint  upon  himself.  At  length, 
speaking  something  more  mildly,   he  told  me,  he  did  not 
like  my  principles.     I  asked,  him  to  point  out  any  of  them 
in  particular,  and   I  would  discourse  with  him   about  it. 
Then  one  error  he  pointed  out,  was  original  sin  j  as  I  held 
it,  that  all  mankind  were  really  guilty  in  Adam,  and  there- 
fore the  word  imputation  never  need  to  be  used  in  that  mat- 
ter ;  for  how  could  that  be  imputed  to  a  man,  which  he  was 
guilty  of  himselL    But  he  held  that  God  was  making  souls 
now  in  these  days,  and  made  a  soul  for  every  body,  when 
the  body  was  once   conceived  in  the  womb,  and  after  he 
makes  the  soul  and  sends  them  into  the  bodies,  he  imputes 
Adam's  guilt  to  them.  And  thus  he  declared  that  thousands 
and  thousands  of  souls  that  were  made  pure  and  innocent, 
were  under  eternal  condemnation  for  a  sin  which  was  com- 
mitted thousands  of  years  before  they  had  any  being.  How- 
ever, I  was  enabled  to  discover  the  inconsistency  of  such  a 
principle  before  his  people,  and  many  were  convinced.  The 
next  point  we  discoursed  on  v/as  election.     Hf.  declared 
that  God  fore -ordained  whatsoever  comes  to  pas&,  which  I 
soon  proved  to  be  impossible  ;  for  God  could  neither  be  the 
autlior  of  sin  nor  decree  a  thing  against  his  own  nature 
The  third  point  we  discoursed  on  was  God*s  incarnation. 
And  when  he  declared  his  sentimentj  it  was  strange  even 


,  i'i 


16* 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE'S 


;i 


I.;  ■ 


to  his  own  people  anr\  church,  that  were  present :  and  that 
v/as  that  God  made  Christ,  And  when  I  did  insist  that  he 
should  give  out  his  own  sentiments,  or  else  he  had  no  right 
to  oppose  others,  I  asked  him  what  God  made  Christ  of: 
he  said,  that  his  body  was  made  of  the  elements  (which  I 
did  not  oppose)  but  that  his  soul  was  made  out  of  nothing. 
Out  of  nothing,  I  replied,  why  then  he  may  return  to  no- 
thiug.  Besides,  if  that  be  the  case,  then  he  is  but  a  crea- 
ture, which  once  was  nothing,  and  is  this  the  Christ  you 
worsliip,  and  expect  to  worship  forever  ?  I  then  told  him 
the  Saviour  I  worshipped  was  the  eternal  Son  of  God,  and 
that  God  had  declared  that  the  Word  was  God,  and  that  the- 
Word  was  made  flesh,  and  that  that  very  infant  that  was 
born,  was  declared  to  be  the  everlasting  Father,  the  Prince 
of  Peace,  and  therefore  he  was  not  a  created  man,  but  God 
manifest  in  the  flesh.  And  then  1  told  him  that  I  believed 
his  people  never  knew  before  now,  that  their  mipister  be- 
lieved tiiat  Christ  was  made  out  of  nothing ;  and  that  I  was 
glad,  he  had  discovered  himself.  He  then  rose  up  in  a  pas- 
sion ?,nd  left  the  house,.  The  people  staid  and  heard  it  all, 
and  many  began  to  get  their  eyes  opened  to  see  where  the 
darkness  was  ;  and  entreated  me  to  visit  them  again,  if  pos- 
sible. After  this  t  rode  down  to  the  lower  settlements,  and 
preached  amongthem*  I.then  went  in  a  boat  to  Partridge 
Island,  where  I  found  a  schooner,  and  went  in  her  to  Horton. 
September  l«t.  I  came  to  Horton  and  preached 
three  sermons  the  same  day.  The  next  morning  I  preach- 
ed again  at'sun-nse  ;  and  a  blessed  morning  it  was  to  many. 
Some,  who  had  been  long  in  bondage,  were  delivered . 

.O  J,csu9;  give  me  strength  divine, 

To  spread  this  lovely  name  of  thine. 
While  mortal  life  remains  ; 

Then  shall  I  make  thy  name  my  song-j        ^    v 

Amongst  the  blest  immortal  throng,  ' 

In  heav'n's  exalted  strains. 
Sd.  I  RODE  to  Falmouth,  found  my  friends  well,  and 
enjoyed  happy  days  with  them  in  the  love  of  Jesus.  I 
went  also  to  Windsor  and  Newport  ;  preached  often  in 
both  places,  conversed  much  with  the  people  there,  and 
fourd  some  still  pressing  on  for  the  immortal  prize.  And 
after  I  had  been  there  c^  while,  I  went  to  Horton  and  Corn- 
wallis,  where  I,  often  preached  eai-ly  in  the  morning,  and 
was  rejoiced  to  see  how  the  people  would  crowd  to  meeting 
so  soon  and  so  early  in  the  morning.  O  the  sweet  hours 
that.  1  have  enjoyed,  proclaiming  my  master's  love  to  th* 


LITE  AND  JOVRNAI:. 


ICS 


fcimgry  souls.  I  remained  in  Cornwallis,  preaching  tv^icci 
and  sometimes  three  times  a  day,  until  the  lust  day  of  Sep« 
tcmber  ;  when  1  went  to  Annapolis,  where  I  preached  of- 
ten and  saw  blessed  days.  Many  of  the  people  of  God 
seemed  to  live  much  of  their  time  on  the  Mount.  O  the 
happiness  of  living  near  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ  !  After  I 
had  met  the  church,  and  pueached  through  all  the  county 
of  Annapohs,  1  set  out  in  company  with  brother  Chipman, 
a  servant  of  Christ,  to  go  to  Cape  Orsue.  We  stopped  and 
preached  at  Annapolis  bason,  and  likewise  at  St.  Mary*B 
b-iy,  where  I  found  some  souls  converted,  since  I  was  there 
last.  We  then  rode  on  our  way,  were  obliged  to  lay  one 
night  in  the  woods,  where  it  rained  all  night.  When  we 
came  to  the  settlements,  we  preached  every  day,  and  saw  a 
>vork  of  God  among  the  people  there.  Some  brought  out 
from  deep  distriisa,  to  joys  unspeakable  and  full  of  glory. 

0  the  glorious  and  joyful  light  to  see  souls  come  out  of 
midnight  darkness  rejoicing  in  God,  and  shouting  forth  the 
\vonders  of  his  love. 

October  13.  Brother  Thomas  Handley  Chipman 
parted  from  me,  and  took  passage  for  the  river  St.  John*s,as 
we  had  designed  the  first  opportunity  presenting..  I  re^ 
mained  ♦lu'ee  or  four  days  preaching  in  those  parts;  and 
then  went  to  Argyle  ;  where  the  people  v/ere  so  engaged, 
that  almost  all  in  the  place  both  old  and  young  attended 
night  and  day  ;  and  the  Spirit  of  the  Lord  wrought  with 
such  power,  that  many  were  constrained  to  cry  out  in  the 
mcieting  ;  some  with  joy,  and  others  in  the  deepest  dis- 
tress of  soul.  I  preached  there  early  and  late  ;  until  about 
the  2Jd.  I  preached  in  the  evening,  after  which  about  IQ 
o'clock  at  night,  1  went  on  board  a  large  boat  to  go  dowa 
to  Harrington.  God  favoured  and  forwarded  me  with 
wind  and  weather,  antl  we  got  to  Cape-Island  before  day- 
break. I  preached  every  day  in  difi'erent  parts  of  Bar- 
rington,  and  there  *>4)peared  much  moving  among  sinnera> 
and  inquiring  after  Christ,  but  none  evidently  dehvered. 
As  fpr  my  own  travels,  they  were  changeable.  Some- 
times I  was  rejoicing  in  the  Lord,  and  strong  in  his  Spirit ; 
but  at  other  times  I  was  under  great  trials  of  mind,  and 
many  times  remarkably  delivered  from  my  bondage. 

'Tis  unbelief  that  keeps  me  down  so  low, 

1  And  is  the  cause  of  all  my  grief  and  woe. 

When  I  believe,  I  feel  all  trials  move  ;  , 

Tken  I  can  triiiniph  t»»  my  maitcr's  luvG. 


V' 


WG6 


*u 


RET.  HENRY  ALLINK'S 


m 


't'^'if 


AfTER  I  had  preached  awhile  in  Barringlort,  I  wferit^ 
through  tlie  woods  with  six  men  in  company  to  the  upper 
Cape  Negro  ;  where  I  preached  two  or  three  days,  found 
the  people  attentive,  and  found  one  christian  among  them  ; 
then  1  went  through  with  some  company  to  Port  Rosaway, 
wliere  I  likewise  found  some  movings  of  the  Spirit  of  God  ; 
but  the  poor  souls  lingered,  and  none  appeared  to  give  up 
all  to  Christ.'  O  that  the;,  may  not  linger,  until  their  day  is 
over.  Have  mercy  on  them,  O  my  God,  and  shak«  them  off 
from  all  their  hopes,  and  bring  them  to  give  up  all  to  thee. 
O  Jesus,  send  by  me  thy  lore, 

To  bring  poor  souls  to  thee  ; 
Let  mourners  feel  their  (^ lilt  remove. 
And  taste  thy  grace  wiih  me. 

"  I  THEN  went  to  the  Ragged  Islands,  where  I  hope 
some  have  been  brought  to  taste  the  love  of  Jlsus.  There 
1  preached  and  enjoyed  happy  days.-  All  their  discourse 
while  1  staid  there  was  about  Jesus  and  his  love.  When 
1  left  that  place,  I  went  with  four  or  five  in  company,  who 
Were  thirsting  after  th©  gospei.-  The  people  at  Sable  Ri^ 
Ter  gave  attention,  but  in  general  it  is  a  very  dark  people. 
I  believe  there  were  some  ot  them  awakened,  and  1  hope 
will  not  rest  till  they  have  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ. 

November  20th.  I  went  to  Liverpool  in  an  open  boat; 
the  wind  was  fair,  but  being  considerably  high,  we  had  like 
to  have  filled  in  the  midst  of  the  breakers  at  some  distance 
from  the  land.  Both  the  irons  of  the  rudder  broke,  and  the 
rudder  was  gone  in  a  moment,  but  the  hand  of  God  was  with 
us,  and  the  boat  did  not  turn  till  we  got  out  an  oar,  and  then 
continued  to  run  before  it  till  we  had  reached  the  harbour. 

Lord,  may  such  favours-of  thine  hand, 
Awake  my  heart  to  love, 
*'  And  lead  me  still  0*er  sea  or  land,  ^' 

While  thro*  this  world  I  rove. 

When  I  came  to  Liverpool,  I  had  the  happiness  to 
meet' a  number  of  my  friends  on  the  wharf,  who  informed 
me  of  the  glorious  work  of  God,  that  had  appeared  ever 
since  I  left  them,  and  was  stilf  going  on  in  the  place.  The 
minister,  whom  they  had  tried  often  to  get  removed  en 
account  of  his  hard  drinking,  was  so  enraged  against  hi» 
people  for  their  holding  up  separate  meetings,  that  he  dt- 
sired  a  dismission,  rather  expecting  that  it  would  be  the 
means  of  their  returning  to  him, '  and  that  when  the  trial 
came  they  would  not  dismiss  him.  But  the  people  em- 
braced the  opportunity,  and  gave  him  his   disnussion  j 


i 


MTE  AK?)  JOURNAL. 


16T 


which  seemed  to  open  the  way  still  more  for  the  work 
of  God,  as  he  wusa  great  opposer.     Almost  all  the  town 
assembled  togethrr,  and  some  that  were  lively  christians 
prayed  and  exhorted,  and  God  was  there  with  a  truth.     I 
preached  every  day,  and  sometimes  twice  a  day  ;  and  the 
houses  where  I  went  were  crowded  almost  all  the  time. 
Many  were  brought  out  t)f  darkness  and  rejoiced,  and  ex- 
horted in  public.     And  O  how  aifecting  it  was  to  see  some 
young  people  not  only  exhort  their  companions,   but  also 
take  their  parents  by  the  hand,  and  entreat  them  for  their 
soul's  sake  to  rest  no  longer  in  their  sins,  but  fly  to  Jesus 
.Christ  while  there  was  hope.     One  young  lad  (who  turned 
out  to  be  a  very  bright  christian)  I  saw,  after  sermon,  take     • 
his  father  by  the  hand,  and  cry  out,  O  father,  you  have 
been  a  great  sinner,  and  now  are  an  old  man  :  an  old  sin- 
ner, with  grey  hairs  upon  your  head,  going  right  down  to 
destruction.     O  turn,  turn,   dear  father,  return  and  fly  to 
Jesus  Christ :  with  jnany  other  such  like  expressions  and 
entreaties,   enough  to  melt  a  stony  heart.     The  work  of 
God  continued  with  uncommon  power  through  almost  all 
the  place.     But  the  small  number  that  did  not  fall  in  with 
the  work  were  raging  and  scoffing,  and  some  blaspheming. 
A  man,  who  «at  one  evening  near  under  the  pulpit,  looked 
up,  as  I  was  delivering  the  truths  of  the  gospel  of  the  Lord 
Jesus  Christ,  and  cried  out,  that  is  damned  foolishness.     I 
looked  upon  him,  and  charged  him  to  cease,   and  likewise 
to  remember  wh?t  his  doorn  would  be,  that  dares  to  blas- 
pheme the  gospel  of  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ ;  and  he  wa« 
awed  to  silence,  and  said  no  more.     O  that  he  and  othef 
such  might  yet  return  before  their  day  is  over,  and  they    . 
eternally  ^one  1 

December  2d.  I  took  a  passage   to  Petit-Riviere, 
where  I  preached  every  day,  but  none  came  out  in  the  lib-  • 
erty  of  Christ'r.  children,  though  many  seemed  to  be  awak- 
ened.    I  then  went  witli  five  or  six  in  company  to   Male- 
gash,  where  I  preached  the  short  time  I  staid  there.     But 
O  the  darkness  of  that  people  1  Almost  all  of  them  are  set- 
tled on  a  form  of  religion,  but  are  strangers  and  enemies  to  > 
the  power  of  it.     There   were  however   some  awakener $ 
and  began  to  enquire  after  Christ  ;   the  others  raged,  and 
opposed  publicly.     I  returned   and   stopped  again  at  Petit-    , 
Riviere,  and  then  went  to   Pott  Midway,  where  I  found' 
«ome   souls  awakened,  p.nd   ca^'iiestly  inquiring  what  tliey 
shall  do  to  be  saved.    ()  Lord  J-'oiiti  Christ,  deliver  them  by  V 


Its 


»EV.  HENRY  ALLWTE'S 


I 


'  t;H 


Mi 


thy  Spirit,  and  give  the  poor  unhappy  souls  rest.  But  &h 
thou  art  willing,  and  it  is  their  own  wills  and  unbelief  that 
keep  them   in  the  dark,  and  bar  them  all  *'rom  thy  love, 

0  those  fatal  bars  of  unbelief . I  What  crowds  are  eternally 
ruined  thereby.  For  because  of  unbelief,  they  could  not 
enter  in. 

December  24th.  I  came  again  to  Liverpool,  wher«  I 
found  the  people  still  vastly  engaged  in  religion,  and  pres- 
sing into  the  kingdom  :  and  almost  all  their  discourse  was 
about  the  wretched  state  of  man,  and  the  glorious  recovery 
by  Jesus  Christ  ;  and  many  rejoiced,  as  it  were,  in  a  new 
world  ;  and  I  would  hear  exhoi'tations  after  every  sermon, 
inviting  others  to  taste,  and  see  that  God  was  gracious. 

January  1st,  1783.  Iwetjt  on  board  of  a  schooner, 
to  go  to  Halifax,  promising  to  i-eturn  again,  if  God  per- 
mitted. When  I  came  there,  I  preached  in  different  parts 
of  the  town,  and  have  reason  to  believe,  that  there  were 
two  or  three  souls  that  received  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ. 
But  the  people  in  genei'al  are  almost  as  dark  and  as  vile  as 
in  Sodom.  Lstaid  tliere  about  ten  days,  and  returned 
again  to  Liverpool,  where  I  still  found  the  waters  troubled, 
and  souls  stepping  in.»  O  the  happy  days  which  I  there 
enjoyed,  not  only  in  my  own  soul,  but  to  see  the  kingdom 
of  God  flourishing.  When  I  went  to  preach  at  the  meet- 
'4ng-house,  at  the  hour  appointed,  the  people  were  crowding 
to  hear  ;  and  when  the  sermon  was  over,  I  was  obliged 
to  stop  many  hours  in  the  broad-alley,  to  discourse  with  the 
people  ;  for  it  seemed  as  if  they  could  not  go  away.  While 

1  was  there  this  last  time,  the  christians  gatheied  together 
in  fellowship,  by -telling  their  experierecs  and  gettirg  fel- 
lowship one  for  another  ;  and  so  joined  in  a  body,  separat- 
ing themselves  from  the  world, 

February  I7th.  I  left  Liverpool,  stopped  and  preach- 
ed at  Port  Midway,  Petit-Riviere,  Lehave  and  Malegash. 

1.  O  God,. may  I  directed  be,  .  ' '' 
While  here,  to  follow  none  but  ibee.   ^ 

Be  this  iry  tbeire,  where'er  I  rove, 
To  tell  the  world  of  Jesus  love. 

2.  Then  when  this  mortal  life  shall  cease, 
,              I  shall  awake  in  realms  of  peace  ; 

Where  I  with  my  dear  God  shall  be  ;  '     '    u   * 

And  give  the  glory,  Lord,  to  thee.  \\     ■ 

27tli.  I  SAILED  from  Malegash  to  Halifax,  where  1 
staid  and  preached  until  the  13th  day  of  March,  and  thc« 
J. set  out  for  the  country,  where  I  found  my  friends  well. 


LIFE   AND  JOURNAL. 


16§ 


sf  that 

rnully 
Id  not 

iher«  I 

1  prts- 
se  was 
c  every 
a  new 
ermcn, 
us. 

ooner, 
d  per- 
il parts 

2  were 
Christ. 

vile  as 
jturned 
iubled, 

theye 
jgdom 

meet- 
(vding 
)bliged 
;iihtbc 
While 


W 


ther 


W% 


fel- 


[parat- 

reach- 
Igash. 


ere 


th«a 
well, 


and  the  christians  growing  in  strength  and  ahve  to  God.  O 
the  liappy  hours  which  1  enjoyed  there,  when  Jesus  was 
among  us  of  u  truth.  I  went  and  preached  in  the  dificrent 
towns  until 

March  26th.  Being  then  at  Windsor,  I  was  takerk 
so  ill,  that  my  life  was  despaired  of ;  but  blessed  be  God, 
I  was  so  blessed  with  divine  strength,  that  I  was  enabled  to 
triumpli  over  deatli  and  the  grave.     And  by 

April  1st,  I  was  so  far  recovered,  that  I  rode  as  far 
as  Horton,  after  which  the  illness  of  my  body  increased. 
But  O  the  happy  hours  which  I  enjoy tid,  even  when  my 
life  was  almost  exhausted.  Jesus  was  my  joy,  my  life, 
my  strength,  my  all.  O  what  shall  I  or  can  1  say  of  such 
great  and  most  infinite  goodness  ol  tlie  Lord. 

In  Christ  I  triumph  over  death  and  hell ; 
In  death  I  lire  ;  in  sickness  I  am  well. 

I  REMAINED  apparently  on  the  confines  of  the  grave, 
and  it  was  thought  by  almost  every  one,  that  I  should  scon 
quit  this  mortal  stage.     But  as  for  my  own   mind  ;  under 
the    greatest   symptoms  of  death,  I  still  retained  a   hope 
that  I  should  yet  go  out  again  in  the  name  of  Jesus  to  poor 
perishing  sinners  ;  which  was   all  I  desired   health    for. 
Yea,  and  oftentimes  when  I  was  triumphing   over   death 
and  the  grave,  my  soul  was  in  a  divine  rajnure,  with  no 
more  doubt,  that  if  I   departed,  I  sho'uld  awake  in  glory, 
than  I  doubted  that  there    was  a  state    of  glory  :  yet  so 
great  was  my  thirst  to  spread  the  kingdom  of  Christ,  and 
l)e  the  means  of  bnnging  precious  and  immortal  souls  to 
him,  that  I  longed   far  more   to   return,  even   if  1  went 
"through  ever  so  many  difficulties  and  troubles,  than  to  de- 
part and  go.      O  how  1  thirsted  for  a  lew  more  days  to  go 
^ut  with  Jesus  with  me,  to  bring  poor  starving  souls  to  the 
courts  of  his   grace,  that  they  might  for  ever  sha'e  v/ith 
"me  in  the  wonders  of  his  love.     After  I  had  been  iu  Hor- 
ton a  while,  I  seemed  to  regain  a,  little  strength,  when  niy 
'  friends  urged  me  to  ride  to  Falmouth,  winch   I   did,  and 
still  remained  very  ill  in  the  body,  but  had  happy  days   ia 
my  mind.     I  spoke  every  Sabbath  a  few  words  in  public, 
which  were  greatly  blessed.     I  had  christian  company  all 
the  time,  and  the  na*me  of  Jesus  was  all  our  theme  :  and 
indeed  we  enjoyed  happy  days.     Almost  every  day  I  re- 
covered strength  again  of  body  so  astoridc  to?Iorton,  where 
I  preached,  and  the   people  attended  in   great  numbers, 

V 


li 


ft' 


hi  ■ 


170 


KSY.   HEVRY   ALLIN£*S 


But  my  disorder  was  flattering  and  changeable.  I  was  very 
ill  agaiH)  so  that  many  of  my  friends  gave  me  over  for 
death.  However  I  was  continued  through  the  goodness  of 
God,  and  I  never  lost  my  senses  in  all  my  sickness,  j 
rode  to  Falmouth  again  with  company  to  help  me.  I  re- 
mained very  ill,  and  sometimes  in  the  greatest  racks  and 
anguish  of  body,  that  could  be  endured,  but  I  think  I  can 
say,  God  gave  me  so  much  strength  to  endure  it,  that  I  was 
never  heard  to  groan  under  all  my  pain.  And  indeed  I 
look  on  it  not  only  a  sin,  to  give  away  to  groaning  and  re- 
pining under  trials,  sickness  or  pains,  but  it  has  a  tenden- 
cy likewise  to  increase  the  trials  and  augment  the  dis- 
eases :  when  on  the  contrary  1  firmly  believe,  that  if  the 
christians  endeavour  to  throw  their  sickness  and  pain  out 
of  their  minds,  and  to  keep  their  minds  soaring  above,  fix- 
ed on  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ,  and  contemplating  divine 
truths,  and  the  state  of  their  souls,  it  would  not  only  enable 
them  in  a  great  measure  to  triumph  over  the  fear  of  death 
and  the  grave,  but  in  some  degree  repulse  the  rage  of  the 
disorder.  Yea,  and  when  enjoying  a  present  Christ,  it  even 
lifts  them  up  above  the  sense  of  their  pains;  Besides,  I 
have  this  to  say,  that  if  any  one  enjoys  the  love  and  the  life 
ot  God  in  their  souls  (while  sick  in  body)  they  can'^ot  find 
heart,  time  or  cause  to  groan  under,  or  ponder  on  their 
bodily  distempers  and  pains.  And  1  am  sure,  if  they  do 
not  feel  and  enjoy  the  life  and  the  love  of  God  in  their  souls 
in  such  trying  hours,  they  have  really  a  thousand  times 
more  reason  to  ponder  on,  and  groan  under  the  miserable 
state  of  their  souls,  than  the  pain  and  disorder  of  the  body  : 
ior  the  soul,  which  is  the  essential  part  of  the  man,  stands 
in  far  the  greatest  need  of  help.  1  remained  in  Falmouth 
with  my  friends,  and  was  very  happy  to  find  the  christians 
so  much  alive  too  as  they  were.  And  as  for  my  own  part, 
blessed  be  God,  I  never  enjoyed  so  great  a  sense  of  divine 
things,  and  the  presence  and  love  of  God,  for  the  length  of 
time,  since  I  knew  the  Lord,  as  when  I  was  sick.  Surely 
I  can  say  that  Jesus  was  my  all,  and  my  life  in  the  midst  of 
death.  He  was  to  me  as  the  shadow  of  a  great  rock  in  a 
weary  land.  Often  did  he  cause  me  not  only  to  triumph  o- 
ver  death  and  the  grave  ;  but  to  forget  my  pains,  and  to  lose 
the  sense  of  my  sickness. 

Thefullo'iaivg  are  ajeiv  lines,  that  lurote  one  morning  at  that  time. 
ALL  IS  WELL  WITH  THE  CHRISTIAN. 
L  Ye  Pilgrims,  bound  to  perfect  bliss, 
Your  Saviour's  goodnes»  teU : 


,/ 


as  very 
i^er  for 
ness  of 
ess.     I 

I  re- 
:k8  and 
k  I  can 
It  I  was 
deed   I 
md  re- 
tenden- 
he  dis- 
L  if  the 
lain  out 
»ve,  fix- 
j  divine 
r  enable 
af  death 
;  of  the 
,  it  even 
asides,  I 
the  life 
'^.ot  find 
on  their 
they  do 
iir  souls 
»d  times 
liserable 
le  body : 

stands 
al  mouth 
iristians 
wn  part, 

divine 
:ngth  of 

Surely 
midst  of 
)ck  in  a 
amph  o- 
d  to  lose 

bat  time. 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL. 


171 


I 


,/ 


If  he  Is  yours,  and  you  are  his, 
Rejoice,  for  all  is  well. 

2.  You've  found  the  only  stream  of  joy, 
Wliere  solid  pleasures  dwell : 

Tho'  hell  may  rage,  and  earth  aanoy, 
Christ  lives  and  all  is  well. 

3.  When  foes  invade,  you  mount  above  ^ 
To  joys  unspeakable, 

,  .  Your  trials  swcet'iwd  al!  with  love,  / 

Then  surely  all  i»  well.  • 

4.  Sinners  may  lose  their  greatest  joy, 
And  find  their  Dagon  fell  : 

But  nothing  can  your  lives  destroy  ; 
Then  sing,  for  all  is  well. 

5.  Christ  is  your  joy,  your  life  and  peacc^ 

There  all  your  treasures  *lwell.  « 

Let  ev'ry  other  helper  cea&e. 
He  lives,  and  all  is  well. 

6.  Mount,  my  triumphant  soul,  abov* 
This  cold,  this  gloomy  celt. 

Long  as  I  feel  immortal  love, 
I  must  say,  all  is  well. 

7.  I'd  ever  live,  where  Jcsui  reigns. 
And  never  more  rebel : 

'^  And  soon  on  heaven's  immortal  plaint, 

I'll  shout,  ah  all  is  well. 

I  STILL  seemed  to  regain  some  strength,  but  very 
slowly,  and  as  I  bad  promised,  and  was  determined  to  go 
to  New-Englsmd  this  summer  (if  God  pleased)  I  thought,  as 
low  as  I  was,  I  would  attempt  it.  And  when  some  of  mv 
fi'iends  told  me,  that  I  was  very  imprudent  to  undertake 
such  fatigue*  in  my  very  low  state  of  health,  and  that  they 
imagined  I  was  in  a  consumption,  I  told  them,  that  if  I 
knew  that  to  be  my  case,  it  would  urge  me  the  more  on, 
for  I  never  desired,  nor  intended;,  if  God  gave  me  strength, 
to  yield  up  to  sickness,  or  the  bed,  as  long  as  I  could  possi- 
bly help  it,  and  therefore,  as  I  had  preached  almost  all  over 
this  country,  if  I  was  in  a  consumption,  I  would  go  and 
proclaim  my  Master'^s  name,  where  I  never  had  preached, 
as  long  as  I  could  riJe  or  stand,  if  it  was  even  to  the  last 
expiring  breath.  Which  determination  I  still  feel,  if  God 
be  with  me,  and  give  me  strength. 

Accordingly  on  the  27th  of  August  I  left  Windsor 
to  go  to  New-England.  It  was  something  hard  parting 
with  vast  numbers  of  my  friends,  who  gave  way  too  much 
to  nature :  but  some  did  so  triumph  over  the  flesh  and 
self,  that  they  bid  me  go  in  the  name  of  the  Lord,  telling 
pie  that  souls  were  as  precious  in  one  place  as  another. 


W3 


REV.  HEKRY  ALL1HI.'». 


iM 


1/ 


I 


My  af^ed  parents,  who  set  too  much  by  mc,  and   I  often 
loiind  it  hard  for  one  to  leave  them,  when  I  was  well,  were 
alive  to  (iod,  and  engaged  for  the  good  of  souls,  that  they 
seemed  to  get  above  llie  affections  and  weakness  of  nutuiT, 
ami  tcld  nie,  that  although  my  heultli  was  so  very  low,  yet 
they  never  parted  with  me  so  easily  before,  and  ulthougli  I 
was  so  lov,  tliey  had  faith  to  believe,  that  1  should  be  yet  a 
blessing  to  some  souls,  before  my  departure  out  of  the  bo- 
dy, saying  that  if  I  went  and  wore  out  my  days  in  the  eause 
of  Christ,  and  was  the  means  of  bringing  any  poor   souls 
into  his  kingdom  all  was  well ;  if  they  never  should  see  my 
face  more  in  time.     It  gave  me   great  satisfaction  to  see 
them  so  strong  in  the  Lord,  as  to  overcome  the  affections 
'of  nature,  and  that  far  U  .ter  love  and  affections  reigned  in 
their  place,  the  heavenly  and  divine  love  in  Christ,  who  had 
made  us  one  in  the  bands  of  everlasting  love  in  such  a  man- 
ner, that  distance  of  body,  nor  death  itself  can  ever  separate.. 
Go  with  me.  Lord,  where  thou  wouldst  have  me  go, 
And  give  me  strength  tJie  gospel  trump  to  blow. 
Bring  home  poor  dinners,  O  my  God,  by  me. 
To  sound  thy  fame,  and  ever  reign  with  thee. 

August  27th.  I  left  Windsor.  The  vessel  sprurg- 
her  mast,  so  that  we  were  obliged  to  put  into  St.  John's  i  i- 
ver  for  a  new  one.  I  preached  once  while  I  was  there ;  but 
U  was  hard  preaching  to  such  hardened,  careless  hearers. 

September  7thc  We  left  Fort  Howe  on  St.  John's 
river  ;  but  the  \  'nd  not  being  fair,  the  voyage  was  tedious 
for  me,  who  was  very  low  in  body  still..  But  God's  provi- 
dence was  such,  that  a  head  wind  caused  us  to  go  into  Jones*- 
river ;  when  I  told  the  captain,  that  I  would  leave  the  vessel, 
buy  a  horse  and  get  along  by  land  ;  which  turned  out  very 
■well,  for  I  found  a  far  larger  country  than  I  expected  so  far 
east.  I  staid  and  preached  a  few  days  in  Bristol  among  a 
vt  ry  dark  people  ;  but  some  were  awakened  under  the  gos- 
pel, and  began  to  inquire  after  Jesus  Christ. 

1 5th.  I  WENT  with  three  men,  that  bore  me  company, 
to  Booth -bay,  where  I  staid  andpreac\'?d  about  a  week.  I 
likewise  found  the  gospel  to  take  hold  of  some,  and  some 
that  were  awakened  at  Bristol,  came  over  to  every  sermoa 
that  I  preached  in  Booth-bay  :  and  even  some  women  with 
children  in  their  arms  travelled  on  foot.  So  great  was  their 
desire  to  hear.. 

22d.  I  RODE  about  four  miles  wHh  \v  dliam  Mecola, 
Esq.  (with  whom  I  had  boarded)  wheie  I  stopped  at  one 
Colonel  Emerson's,  and  preached  there,  the  ne:.t  day  tQ.,» 


f 


LIFE  AND    JOURNAL. 


n: 


'.  often 
1,  were 
vt  they 
nuturc, 
w,  yet 
oui;!^  I 
c  yet  a 
the  bo- 
e  tause 
r   souls 
see  my 
to  see 
'cctions 
|:!;ncd  in 
ho  had 
a  nian- 
:parate.. 
go,. 


sprur  g- 

hn's  1  i- 

re;  but 

irers. 

John's 

edious 

provi- 

Jones*- 

vessel, 

ut  very 

d  so  far 

Tiong  a 

le  gos- 

mpany, 
ek.  I 
some 
ermoa 
n  with 
s  their 

VIecolj, 
at  one 

y  ta.» 


" 


p-eat  number  of  people.  They  seemed  muc^  alarmed  by 
the  gospel,  and  some  so  awakened,  that  I  trust  they  will 
never  rest,  until  they  have  foimd  Christ.  O  that  they 
might  once  be  brought  to  an  union  with  Christ,  without 
which  there  is  no  safety  or  happiness. 

24th.  I  RODE  with  Col.  Emerson,  who  accompanied 
me  up  the  river,  intending  to  goto  the  ferry  at  Sheep's  (iut 
that  night.  But  when  I  came  to  sec  so  many  inhabitants 
on  Amesscotty,  I  told  him  that  my  mind  was  not  easy,  to 
go  by  them  ;  L  therefore  stopped  and  preached  on  both 
sides  of  the  river,  and  trust  it  was  not  in  vain  ;  for  some 
christians  were  greatly  revived,  and  some  sinners  much  a- 
wakened.  O  that  they  might  never  rest  until  they  find  the 
true  rest.  Lord  Jesus,  have  mercy  on  their  poor  burdened 
souls,  that  are  wandering  in  a  wilderness  and  know  thee  not. 

29th.  I  RODE  over*  to  the  other  river,  and  the  next  day 
I  preached  there,  and,  blessed  be  God,  I  trust,  it  was  not  in 
vain :  and  seeing  the  people  so  engaged,  made  me  stay 
longer  and  preach  again  ,  when  I  still  saw  some  more  mov- 
ings  amongst  the  people  ;  though  many  were  very  much 
hardened.  I  endured  vast  pains  and  anguish  of  body  al- 
most every  day,  and  was  many  times  scarcely  able  to 
preach  ;  but  I  endiwed  it  without  much  complaining,  for  I 
enjoyed  health  of  soul,  and  was  very  happy  at  times  in  the 
Lord  Jesus  Christ.  But  as  I  had  just  got  into  that  part  of 
the  vineyard,  and  saw  the  fields  as  it  were  white  unto  the 
harvest,  1  had  intended  (if  Providence  permitted)  to  blow 
the  gospel  trumpet  through  that  vast  country,  and  I  could 
not  bear  the  thoughts  of  leaving  the  world  ;  although  I  was 
happy  and  had  not  the  least  doubt  of  ray  salvation  :  for  I 
longed  more  than  tongue  can  express,  to  be  the  means  of 
bringing  some  of  those  poor  souls  to  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ. 

October  5th.  I  preached  at  Sheep's  Gut,  and  saw 
much  moving  of  the  Spirit  of  God.  Indeed  some  were  in 
such  distress,  they  could  hardly  contain  themselves.  O  that 
God  might  bring  them  to  himself? 

Monday  morning-the  Selectmen  of  the  town  sent  me 
a  request  for  to  stay  longer  ;  but  I  could  not  find  it  my  du- 
ty, being  under  pressing  obligations  to  visit  other  parts, 
that  stood  in  as  great  a  need,  and  yet  it  was  hard  :o  leave 
the  poor  awakened  sinners. 

Monday  I  went  to  an  island  called  Squam,  where 
tiiere  had  been  a  work  of  God;  and  I  found  some  lately 

P2 


174 


HtY.  HENRY  ALLINR*S 


l(:!|  if 


'II 
I  . 


born  to  Christ.     But  O  how  common  it  is  in  a  time  of  re- 
vival, for  many  to  be  deceived,  fend  to  take  up  with  some- 
thing short  of  Christ.     I  remained  in  Squam  until  Satur- 
day, and  then  rode  to  Woolwich,  where  I  preached  on  the 
Sabbath,  and  saw  much  of  the  power  of  God.    But  O  how 
apt  are  young  chnstians  to  be  led  astray,  being  so  fond  of 
every  thing  that  appears  like  the  power  of  God,   that  they 
receive  almost  any  thing  that  has  a  zeal,  not  considering, 
that  when  God  is  at  work,  that  then  is  the  time  for  the  de- 
vil to  covmterfeit.     I  heard  men  exhori,   that  had  nothing 
of  the  Spirit  of  Christ,  but  many  of  the  christians  thought 
them  certainly  right,  because  they  Seemed  to  have  a  great 
zeal.     I  love  to  see  preachers  zealous,  yea,  and  I  believe,  if 
they  have  the  spirit  of  God,  which  brings  meekness,  love 
and  humility  with   the  zeal,   and  solemnizes  the  person 
speaking,  it   will  not  be  all  ovei"  as  soon  as  they  have  done 
speaking  in   public,  but  will  go  Wxth  them  :  when  those 
who  have  nothing  but  a  spirit  of  self,  and  a  false  zeal,  will 
appear  to  speak  light  and  airy,  and  lifted  up,  and  v/hen  hav- 
ing been  in  a  great  zeal^  it  will  be  soon  over,  and  have  no 
solemnizing  sense  abiding,  but  grow  careless  and  light,  and 
easily  and  soon  lead,,  or  be  led  into  vanity  and  sin. 

Monday,  I  rode  about  three  miles,  and  then  preached 
to  a  small  number  that  were  living  christians  ;  though 
there  were  sinners  among  them,  yet  it  was  easy  preach" 
ing  and  a  happy  day  it  was  to  many. 

October  16th.  I  preached  at  Bath,  and  the  next 
day  rode  over  to  Brunswick,  where  I  staid  three  days,  and 
found  son\e  sincere  christians,  but  not  much  moving  among 
sinners.  O  the  wretched  state  of  careless  sinners  !  My 
heart  aches  for  them,  and  fain  would  be  a  means  of  help- 
ing them  ;  but  what  shall  I  say,  or  what  can  be  done  for 
tliem?  The  spirit  of  God' doth  labour  with  them,  and  be- 
seeches them,  and  if  they  reject  that,  what^  O  what  can 
^  help  them  ? 

21st.  I  RODE  down  to  Harrislcket,  where  the  people 
were  almost  all  in  a  deep  sleep  with  hardly  a  form  of  reli- 
gion. 1  was  so  ill,  when  I  first  got  there,  that  I  was  scarce- 
ly able  to  ride  ;  but  I  appointed  a  lecture,  and  when  I  came 
to  sp.ak,  God  gave  me  strength,  and  the  people  great 
attention.  The  Sabbath  following,  I  saw  so  much  of  a 
moving  among  the  people,  that  I  was  greatly  encourage^, 
and  concluded  to  stay  another  week  :  I  preached  lectures 
on  the  week-days,  and  had  the  happiness  to  see  some  cf- 


i 


r 


t 


I 


LIFE  AND  JOUnNAf.. 


<  5 


of  re- 

some- 

Satur- 

)n  the 

3  how 

bnd  of 

t  they 

lering, 

he  de- 

lothin^ 

loii^ht 

great 

ieve,  if 

>s,  love 

person 

^e  done 

1  those 

al,  will 

m  hav- 

lave  no 

^ht,  and 

'cached 
though 
:^reach" 

le  next 
lys,  and 
among 
i  !  My 
f  help- 
one  for 
ind  be- 
lat  can, 

people 
:)f  reli- 
scarce- 
I  came 
e  great 

h   of  IK 

iragea, 
xtures 
ne  ef- 


I 

I 

I 


fects  of  the  gospel.  There  were  two  that  I  believed  re- 
ceived Christ,  and  could  tell  of  his  love  ;  and  others  were 
groaning  under  a  sense  of  their  danger,  while  out  of  Christ.. 
I  hid  a  great  desire  to,  stay  longer  v>vth  them,  but  thought 
it  my  duty  to  proceed.  Othat  God  would  out  of  his  love 
and  power  carry  on  the  work  in  those  mourning  souls  I 

I   STAID    there  until  the   3d  day  of  November,   and: 
preached  among  the  people,  and  I  have  reason  to  hope  that 
it  was  not  in  vain,  for  there  were   some  that  I  discoursed ; 
with  after  sermon,  that  manifested  some  movings  in  their 
minds  ;  biit  the  people  in  general  were  settled  down  on  a 
form  of  religion,   and  some   not  even  on  that,  but  all  at 
peace,  and  but  here  and  there  one  among  a  great  crowd 
of  professors   that  know   any  thing  of  the  v/ork  of  God  in 
their  souls.    O  the  shocking  and  irretrievable  loss  they  will, 
meet  with  when   tliis  poor  miserable  life  is  at  a  period. 
They  go   sleeping  to.  the   gi^ave,  with  an  expectation  of 
awakening  in  heaven,  when  they  have  that  nature  in  them, 
in  their  own  souls,  that  will  be  a  hell  to  them  for  ever  :  and . 
this  is  the   shocking  mistake,   that  thousands  make  a  de- 
pendance  upon  Ciod  to  save  them,  and  to  keep  them  out  of 
hell,  and  beg  that  they  may  not  go  so  hell,  but  do  not  think  . 
'  of  their  being  already  in  hell,  nor  make  it  their  concern  to 
have  their  naturesx:hanged  from  that  nature  of  hell,  to  the 
nature  of  heaven* 

3d.  I  RODE  to  the  tov/n  below,  where  I  preached  ;  and! 
I  think  they  were  the  most  careless,  hardened  people,  that 
I  had  found  on  that  eastern  shore  ;  Lord  what  will  their 
end  be  !  O  that  they  might  consider  and  be  awakened  be- 
fore their  day  is  over  !  I  then  went  to  New-Casco,  wl^ere 
I  preached,  luid  the  people  gave  great  attention,  and  there 
began  to  be  some  movings.  I  staid  and  preached  there 
some  days.  The  minister  of  the  place  was  very  free,  and i 
rejoiced  to  see  some  movings  among  his  people. 

On  Wednesday  the  1 2th,  I  preached  at  a  wedding, . 
and  had  the  happiness  thereby  to  be  the  means  of  exclud- 
ing carnal  mirth  ;  and  the  young  people  seemed  more  fond 
after  sermon  of  gathering  round  about  me  to  hear  me  dis- 
coursing on  religion,  and  to  give  them  advice,  than  to  be  in 
the  other  company.  And  when  I  went  ^.way  they  likewise 
scattered  and  went  home.  O  Lord  Jesus,  follow  them 
with  thy  blessing,  and  let  not  the  least  impression  on  their 
mind  be  lost. 

13th,  I  RODE  over  to  one  Mr.  Brown's,  preacliedthe 


(li 


'"d- 


I  i 


REV.  HENRY  ALLINE's 


t  !i 


\i 


h\ 


il ! 


\ ; 


Sabbatli  there,  and  I  think  the  Lord  spoke  to  the  hearts  of 
some.     And  as  for  my  own.  part,  blessed  be  God,  my  soul 
was  ahve,  and  my  tongue  at  Hb'jriy  to  plead  with  poor  sin- 
ners in  the  name  of  Jesus.* 

17th.  I  RODE  to  Falmouth,  ^\here  one  Mr.  Dean  was 
minister.  I  pvea':hed  once  in  the  week  and  once  on  the  Sab- 
bath in  his  meeting-house  to  a  great  crowd  of  people. 

Monday  I  rode  to  the  next  parish  where  one  Mr* 
Lancaster  was  minister.  As  for  my  bodily  illness,  it  was 
still  so  great  and  heavy  on  me,  that  I  was  scarcely  an 
hour  free  from  pain,  excepting  when  asleep  ;  but,  blessed 
be  God,  he  was  the  supporter  and  comforter  of  my  mind. 

Here  ends  Mr..  Alline'3  journal,  sickness  preventing 
his  proceeding  further  in  it. 

In  the  foregoing  pages  Ave  have  had  a  pai'ticular  ac- 
count of  ti  e  dealings  of  God  with  the  pious  Mr.  Henry 
Alline  frora  his  childhood  and  youth,  up  to  w'thin  a  little 
better  than  two  months  of  his  death  ;  viz.  of  Gcd's  dealings 
with  him  under  his  conviction  ;  of  his  conversion,  his  call 
to  t'.e  ministry,  his  engaging  therein,  of  his  success  in  the 
ministry  ;  of  the  abuses  and  persec.uiions  he  met  with  in 
k  ;  and  niany  more  particulars  relating  to  him. 

We  have  but  Httle  account  of  hif>  travels  and  preach- 
ing from  the  time  he  discontinued  hit/  journal  by  reason  of 
his  sickness  and  pains  till  about  a  fortnight  before  his- 
death,  which  happened  on  the  2d  of  Fthrnary,  1784,  be- 
tween thixie  and  four  o'clock  in  the  morning,  at  the  Rev. 
Mr.  M*Clure'^,  minister  of  North-Hampton^,  in  the  state  of 
New- Hampshire. 

An  account  of  his  glorious  and  triumphant  death  is 
given  by  the  Rev.  Mr.  M'Clure  in  the  two  following  letters 
wrote  to-Mr.  William  Alline  of  Falmouth,  thcfkther  of  the 
deceased; 

SIR, 

Soon  after  the  death  of  yom'  son  T  wrote  you  by  a  ves- 
-.2I  which  sailed  from  Newbury -Port,  informing  vou  of  the 
melancholy  Providence.  The.letter  was  inclosed  to  Mr. 
liewolf,  of  Windsor,  which  I  hope  you  have  received  ;  but 
as  it  may  have  miscarried,  bejng'now  in  Boston,  from 
whence  there  are  frequent  oppoK'tunities  of  conveyance  to 
Nova-Scmi;i,I  shall  leave  this  to  bc.Turwarded  by  your  neph- 
ew, ^Mr.  Henry  Alline..  i 

TiiK  following  extracts  from  some  minutes,  which.  I 
kept  of  your  son's  sickness  and  death,  \  now  send  you,  con- 


LITE  AND  JOURNAL. 


irr 


r.Q^ 


/ 


V  ■ 


cludinpj  it  will  be  satisfactory  to  his  bereaved   parents,  to 
know  the  particulars  of  the  last  day^  of  so  pious  a  son. 

January  22d.  He  arrived  at  my  house  accompaniedby 
the  Rev.  Mr.  McClintock,  very  feeble,  to  appearance  in  the 
last  stage  of  a  hectic,  and  much  oppressed  with  the  asthma. 

25th.  Hk  rode  to  the  meeting  house,  and  preached 
from  Luke  19th  c.  5th  v. 

26th,.  To  day  had  a  faint  sinking  turn  oppressed  at 
his  stomach,  too  weak  to  proceed  on  his  intended  journey  to 
his  friends  in  Boston. 

27tb.  Confixed  to  day  to  his  bed. 

28th,  Last  night  an  abscess,  which  had  been  for  some 
days  gathering,  broke  and  discharged  a  quantity  of  putrid 
blood  and  water,  which  has  lessened  his  pain,  and  he  is  able 
to  sit  up. 

29th.  Still  growing  weaker,  )iis  feet  swell,  and  his 
cough  severe.  Expecting  death  approaching,  he  commit- 
ted to  my  care  his  papers  and  effects,  with  direction  to  be 
paiticularly  careful  of  a  number  of  hymns,  which  he  had 
prepared  tf)  be  published,  with  directions  to  write  to  his 
Iriends  in  Nova-Scotia,  concluding  his  brother  would  come, 
to  take  care  of  them. 

30th.  This  morning  worse,  had  no  sleep  last  night ; 
kept  awake  by  tlie  asthma,  cough  and  fever.     He  told  me^. 
he  found  hinaself  goings  The  symptoms  of  death  upon  him,, 
and  said  none  but  Christ,  none  but  Christ,.    Yesterday  the 
doctor,  who  had  attended  him  from  the  time  of  his  arrival,, 
asked  him  how  he  did?  he  answered,  1  have  nothing  to 
promise  myself  with  regard  to  life.     I  am  going  and   will- 
ing to  go.     Willing,  not  because  I  must  die  ;  but  because 
1  hixvc  a  friend,  who  will  support  me  in  death. 

Satuiidav,3  1st.  He  told  me  he  had  a  wearisome  night 
with  his  bodily  pains.  One  asked  him  how  he  did,  he  said 
I  am  in  terrible  distress,  but  yet  I  am  well.  He  would  oft- 
en say,  that  he  had  sweet  hours.  Such  views  of  divine 
things,  as  made  him  almost  forget  all  his  pains. 

Restless  without  sleep  all  day  ;  the  nurse  constantly 
holding  him  up  in  the  bed  in  the  day  time,antl  this  the  great- 
er part  of  the  night.     His  strength  decays  very  rapidly. 

He  desired  me  to  sit  down  and  write   some  things  he 
ahould  tell  me,  respecting-h'is  life  ;  having  a  desire,  he  said,, 
that  poor  sinners  should  be  made  acquainted  with  some  re- 
markable providences  of  God  towards  him,  but  he  was  too. 
weak  to  converse,  and  said  he  must  put  it  off. 


178 


lEV,  KFNRY  ALLINE's 


r 

I 


It  seems  he  preached  every  Sabbath  from  the  time  he 
left  Nova-Scotia.  He  toM  me,  it  had  pleased  God  so  far  to' 
bless  his  labours,  particularly  among  the  young  people  at 
Harrisicket,  that  he  has  no  reason  to  be  sorry  that  he  had 
undertaken  the  journey,  although  m  so  much  weakness. 
He  frequently  expressed  in  his  prayers  and  conversation 
most  benevolent  wishes  for  the  spiriluul  welfare  of  his 
friends,  particularly  in  Nova-Scotia,  and  for  the  churches 
which  he  was  connected  with.  He  was  about  to  send  foi*^ 
some  of  his  friends  in  Boston  to  come  and  see  him,  but  con- 
cluded it  would  be  too  late.  He  chose  to  converse  on  no  sub- 
jects but  Christ  and  the  love  God  in  our  redemption. 

February  1st.  Sabbath  morning.  No  sleep  the  last 
night ;  his  fever  high ;  he  has  his  reason  well ;  distress- 
ed for  breath,  patient  in  his  distress,. and  resigned  to  the  will 
of  God.  I  said  he  was  fast  approaching  to  the  end  of  his 
wearisome  journey,  and,  as  1  trusted,  to  his  entrance  in  a 
glorious  rest.  He  said  with  great  earnesmess  ;  O  I  long 
for  it,  I  long  for  it;  I  observed  to  him  that  the  promises 
of  the  gospel  were  a  divine  support  to  all  who  love  our  Lord 
Jesus.  O  yes,  said  he,  but  the  promiser  is  greater  than  the 
promises,  and  he  is  with  me*  Going  to  meetmg  he  desir- 
ed a  remembrance  in  our  prayers,  and  said,  O  tell  all  my 
friends,  that  the  blessed  gospel,  which  I  have  preached  to^ 
th6m  is  true,  in  *vhich  they  must  believe  in  the  lively  belief 
of,  and  in  which  they  will  be  safie  in  death.  Sir,  O  preach; 
that  blessed  gospel.^ 

By  reason  of  his  great  bodily  pains  and  longing  to  be 
with  Christ,  he  would  sometimes  check  himself,  fearing  he 
was  too  impatient  to  be  gone.  I  desire,  says  he,  to  wait 
God*s  time.  He  said,  he  had  begged  of  God,  that  he  might 
not  outlive  his  usefulness.  O  I  long,  said  he,  that  poor  sin- 
ners should  have  such  views  of  the  Lord  Jesus>  as  I  have. 

He  wouM  frequently  exhort  spectators  to  get  an  in- 
terest in  Christ,  assuring  them  that  none  but  Christ  would 
answer  for  them,  when  thev  came  to  die. 

In  the  afternoon  he  told  me  he  was  afraid  he  should 
lose  his  reason,  but  hoped  that  God  wou'd  continue  to  him 
that  blessinor. 

In  the  evening  I  observed  to  him  that  Christ  was  now 
his  only  help,  .he  said,  I  need  not  to  be  told  of  that,  he  is 
iww  my  only  desire.  His  distress  increased,  and  he  longed 
to  depart.  I  observed  to  him,  that  I  trusted  he  would  soon 
obtain  the  gracious  fulfilment  of  the  promises.     I  have  n« 


'I  / 


^' 


LIFE  AND  JOURNAL, 


179 


/ 


H/ 


v. 


■doulot,  said  lie,  r.ot  one,  no  more  than  if  I  was  now  there. 
He  lay  in  great  distress,  groaning  and  reaching  for  breath  ; 
iuitil  aijoiit  midnight  he  said,  his  thoughts  began  to  be  con- 
fused ;  ily.'X  he  was  not  in  a  condition  to  pray  ;  desired  me 
to  go  to  prayer  ;  and  at  the  close  he  repeated  a  loud  and 
joyful  amen.  It  was  evident  soon  afier,  that  his  reason  was 
going,  and  his  broken  sentences  were  the  breathings  of  a 
soul  swallowed  up  in  God. 

In  this  state  he  lay  about  two  hours  in  great  distress 
for  breath,  and  the  last  intelligible  sentence  he  spoke  was 
in  the  strain  of  his  geneaal  conversation  in  these  word«. 
Now  I  rejoice  in  the  Lord  Jesus. 

And  between  three  and  four  o*clock  in  the  morning  he 
breathed  out  his  soiU  into  the  arms  of  Jesus,  with  whom 
he  longed  to  be.  Such  was  his  peaceful  end.  The  righ- 
teous hath  hope  in  his  death.  Happy  the  man  who  dieth 
the  death  of  the  righteous,  and  whose  last  end  is  like  his.  O 
Tnay  the  living  lay  it  to  heart,  and  be  excited  by  the  speak- 
ing example  of  lively  truth  and  holy  fortituae  in  death  to 
redouble  their  diligent  efforts  to  secure  the  unfading-prize 
of  immortal  life. 

THE  FUNERAL. 

The  Height Jirrlng-  minister*  were  requested  to  attend,  and 
they  accordingly  came  and  walked  as  bearers. 

Feburay  3d.  The  corps  vas  carried  from  my  house  to  the 
meetiiijg-house.  The  Rev.  Dr.  Langdtm  made  a  orayer  adapted 
to  ihe  solerenity,  and  a  funeral  hymn  was  sung-.  It  was  then  con- 
vejed  to  the  burying-yard,  preceded  by  s'x  underbearers,  includ- 
ing  the  deacons,  ami  deposited  in  a  grave  near  to  that  of  the  Rev. 
Mr.  Gookin,  ibrincr  pastor  of  the  church. 

BEARERS. 
Rev.  Mr.  Noble,  of  St.  John's       .  trj    Rev.   Mr.   Buckminster,  ot 

River,  Nova-Scotia.  ^  <^    Portsmouth,  N.  Hampshire. 

Rev,  Mr.  McClure,  of  North-     fri  ^|    Rev.  Mr.  Thayer,  of  Hamp- 

ampton,  New-Hampsliire.       ^    •'  ton,  do. 

Rev.  Mr.  McClintock,  of  Green-^    _    Rev.Dr.  Langdon.of  Hamp- 
landjdo.  jij  ton  Falls,  do. 

Tkk  eflects  which  he  has  left  are   principally    a   horse  and 
sleigh,  hid  apparel  and  about  twelve  dollars  in  money. 

As  I  doubt  not,  Sir,  from  your  worthy  son's  frequent  mention 
of  you,  that  you  and  his  honoured  mother  have  long  walked  with 
God,  tliat  it  might  afford  you  unspeak.ible  sutisfaction,  that  you 
have  hern  blessed  with  such  a  son,  and  hare  the  triumphant  hope 
of  speedily  meeting  him, no  more  to  part,  in  the  bright  region  of 
eternal  day. 

I  AM,  Sir,  with  great  esteem,  your  verv  obedient  and  sincere 
friend  and  servant,  DAVID  McCLURE. 

North- Hampton,  New-Hampshire,  April  29th  1784, 
Mr,  William  Alline. 


!80 


R£V.   HENRY  ALLIKE's 


!  i 


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I; 


M, 


DEAR  SIR, 

Yesterday  I  had  the  satisfaction  to  receive  a  letter  from  yon, 
elated  the  18th  of  May,  on  the  melancholy  subject  of  the  deatli  of 
your  late  pious  and  worthy  son.     I  had  long  been  waiting  with  ilic 
expectation  of  hearing  trom  you,  or  seeing  one  of  your  sons  here  « 
which  was  the  expectation  of  the  deceased,  to  see  about  his  pa- 
pers and  dffects  ;  but  my  letters  to  3  on  have  unfortunately  mis- 
carried.    I  wrote  you  about  three  weeks  after  your  son's  decease, 
by  a  small  vessel  belongiwgto  the  river  St.  John's  from  Newbury- 
port.     The  letters  were  put  on  board  by  the  postmaster.     The  let- 
ter to  you  was   inclosed   to  Mr.   Low  ran   Dewolf  of  Windsor. 
About  the  begiiniing  of  May  I  wrote  aiyain  from  Boston  to  you, 
giving  a  more  particular  account  of  the  triumphant  exit  of  your 
fcon,  together  w  ith  the  most  remarkable  occurrences  of  liis  life 
during  liis  confinement.     That  letter  I    left  to  the  care  ol  your 
kinsman,  Mr.  Henry  Alline,  of  Boston,  and  liope  that  one  or  both 
of  the  above  have  C(ime  lo  your  hands  before  this  time.     Your  son 
giive  me  a  particular  charge  with  respect  to  a  number  of  hymns, 
which  it  wus  his  desire  should  be  published,  for  the  benefit  more 
especially  of  his  friends  in  Nova  Scotia.     He  had  begun  to  draw 
oM  the  journal  of  his  life  in  a  legible  hand,  but  had  proceeded  but 
a  little  way  in  it.     He  expressed  a  desire  to  have  the  remarkable 
providences   of  God  towards  him  made  public  for   the   good    of 
^ouls.     And  if  some  judicious  person,  who  is  ac([uainted  v.^th  the  ' 
characters  in  which  he  u  rote,  would  undertake  it ;  something  well 
worthy  of  the  attention  of  the  i)»iblic,  and  which  might  be  very  ben- 
eficial, might  be  collected.     He  appears  to  have  been,  by  what  I 
ean  gather  Irom  his  journals,  a  burning  and  shining  light  in  Nova 
Scotia  and  elsewhere,  and  that  many  souls  rejoiced  in  his   light. 
And  his  christian  virtues,  zeal,  fortitude,  fiith,  hope,  rjatience  and 
resignation  shone  bright  as  the  lamp  of  life  burnt  down  into  the 
socket.     And  we  trust,  he  is  now  united  with   s*eraphs  and  saints 
in  their  pure  ardours  oi'  holy  love  ajnd  c^-erlasting  joy.     From  the 
time  of  his  landing  on  tlic  eastern  ^horc,  until   his  arrival  at  Fal- 
mouth, his  journal  is  continued  ;  after  that  his  infirmities  prevent- 
ed his  continuing  it  ;  although  they  prevented  not  his  preaching, 
which  seems  to  have  been  attended  with  j)ower  to  the  consciences 
of  sinners  in  almost  all  the  eastern  shore,  where  he  bestowed  his  la- 
hoiu's.    May  it  please  the  Author  of  all  gracious  influences  to  che- 
rish the   seed  sown  there,  and  cause  it  to  bring  forHi  fruit  which 
t'hall  be  to  the  praise  of  redeeming  love,  and  a  crown  of  joy  to  him 
tie  faithful  labourer. 

In  my  letter  to  you,,  I  gave  an  account  of  your  son's  effects, 
and  agreeable  to  your  directions  shall  forward  them  together  with 
his  papers,  to  your  nephew,  Mr.  Henry  Alline  at  Boston,  to  be  by 
I»im  forwarded.  Wishing  you,  dei'r  sir,  and  your  worthy  partner 
the  divine  consolations  m  tlie  vale  of  life,  and  a  happy  meeting  with 
our  friend,  your  dear  departed  son,  and  the  best  of  Heaven's  bles- 
sings to  }()ar  family,  I  s\ibscribc  my  sell",  dear  Sir,  your  sympathiz- 
ing, allectionate,  though,  unktiown  friend  and  servunt, 

DAVID  IM'CLURS. 
Nonh-Hampton,  New- Hampshire^  Aug.  3d.  ir84. 


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